University of Virginia Library

That is rather a lame excuse for a man who means to trot fair. What
is it but saying “my groom left the stable door open and somebody stole
my saddle?”—But what can WE do? will some of the legal branches of
our tree of knowledge let a small apple of advice fall into our lap? Seven
and sixpence we paid to a night-school-teacher to dig into one of our ministerial
imps, how to render an account current of the stuff into our vernacular.
We forbear to do more than to add the render—the get. Here it is!

“Cicero in Elysium—heathen E—next door to—vide Virgil:—

Taking his comfort,

L. L. D.—O. K., &c. &c. &c.

“Respectfully and profoundly,
“With sentiments of the highest consideration,
“Have the honor to be, &c.

“How much grief I have been cursed with, and how much enjoyment I
have been deprived of, both domestic and forensic”—then comes some
English—after that—“by that infernal break down of Grey Eagle on the
third heat, you being present and weeping—more Latin—`stadii functus
offico'—used up—then a little more English, to the word `course' inclusive,
then, in the first place read `IMPRIMIS'—which every body knows by
heart:—go on—`according to our fashion, my dear fellow.' The rest is
easy as losing a bet. Do you want to go on any thing privately? Put
up your currency. The dew will rust it. Peace, the swifest kind of horses
—a Westly Richards fowling piece of the last and most ample build, rod
and hooks lucky, and most of all a mistress true and beautiful be with you.”

That's pretty much the story. The note is rather familiar than modest.
But, as we said before, what can we do? Cicero writes, and we can't
lose a word of the letter. We shall call our next colt “Atticus,” after
ourselves.—Editors.