Satyres and Satyricall Epigrams: With Certaine Observations at Black-Fryers: By H: F: [i.e. Henry Fitzgeffrey] |
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Want
it for Women woe shu'd all be men.
I cannot present better instance, then
In yon Spruse Coxcombe, yon Affecting Asse,
That neuer walkes without his Looking-glasse,
In a Tobacco box, or Diall set,
That he may priuately conferre with it.
How his Band jumpeth with his Peccadilly,
Whether his Band strings ballance equally:
Which way his Feather wagg's: And (to say truth)
What wordes in vtterance best become his mouth.
Oh! Hadst thou yesterday beheld the Valour
I saw him exercising on his Taylour.
How, out of measure, hee the Ruscall beat,
Not fitting to his minde his Doublet.
Lord! how I laught to see the witlesse Noddy,
Durst not reply, he meant it to his Body.
See Villain, Rogue! (And in he shrinks his brest)
Oh Heauens! Too wide a handfull at the least,
Straight it is Cut! And then proues (being try'd)
As much too little on the other side.
But what skil't! Hee'l haue an attractiue Lace,
And Whalebone-bodyes, for the better grace.
Admit spare dyet, on no sustnance feed,
But Oatmeale, Milke, and crums of Barly-bread.
Vse Exercise vntill at last hee fit:
(With much adoe) his Body vnto it.
I cannot present better instance, then
In yon Spruse Coxcombe, yon Affecting Asse,
That neuer walkes without his Looking-glasse,
In a Tobacco box, or Diall set,
That he may priuately conferre with it.
Whether his Band strings ballance equally:
Which way his Feather wagg's: And (to say truth)
What wordes in vtterance best become his mouth.
Oh! Hadst thou yesterday beheld the Valour
I saw him exercising on his Taylour.
How, out of measure, hee the Ruscall beat,
Not fitting to his minde his Doublet.
Lord! how I laught to see the witlesse Noddy,
Durst not reply, he meant it to his Body.
See Villain, Rogue! (And in he shrinks his brest)
Oh Heauens! Too wide a handfull at the least,
Straight it is Cut! And then proues (being try'd)
As much too little on the other side.
But what skil't! Hee'l haue an attractiue Lace,
And Whalebone-bodyes, for the better grace.
Admit spare dyet, on no sustnance feed,
But Oatmeale, Milke, and crums of Barly-bread.
(With much adoe) his Body vnto it.
Hee'l not approach a Tauerne, no nor drinke ye
To saue his life Hot-water, (wherefore thinke ye,)
For heating's Liuer! Which some may suppose
Scalding hote, by the Bubbles on his Nose.
Hee'l put vp any publique foule disgrace,
Rather then hazzard cutting of his Face.
If in his Element you'd haue the (Foole!)
Aske him when he came from the Dauncing-school
Whereas much Leather he doth dayly waste
In the French Cringe, which Ieremy brought last.
And more, then Coriat (I dare maintaine)
In going to the Alpes and backe againe.
Whereof, that all the world may notice take,
See! euery step an Honor hee doth make
That Ladyes, may denote him with their Fan,
As he goes by, with a Lo: Hee's the man.
To saue his life Hot-water, (wherefore thinke ye,)
For heating's Liuer! Which some may suppose
Scalding hote, by the Bubbles on his Nose.
Hee'l put vp any publique foule disgrace,
Rather then hazzard cutting of his Face.
If in his Element you'd haue the (Foole!)
Aske him when he came from the Dauncing-school
Whereas much Leather he doth dayly waste
In the French Cringe, which Ieremy brought last.
And more, then Coriat (I dare maintaine)
In going to the Alpes and backe againe.
Whereof, that all the world may notice take,
See! euery step an Honor hee doth make
That Ladyes, may denote him with their Fan,
As he goes by, with a Lo: Hee's the man.
| Satyres | |