LETTER XXXII.
TO MR. CHARLES DEIGHTON.
Hartford.
I AM really banished and rejected;
desired never more to think of the girl I love,
with a view of indulging that love, or of rendering
it acceptable to its object! You will perhaps,
dispute the propriety of the term, and tell
me it is not love, it is only gallantry, and a desire
to exercise it with her, as a favorite nymph.
I neither know, nor care by what appellation
you distinguish it, but it truly gives me pain. I
have not felt one sensation of genuine pleasure
since I heard my sentence; yet I acquiesced
in it, and submissively took my leave; though I
doubt not but I shall retaliate the indignity one
time or other.
I have taken possession of my new purchase,
an elegant and delightful residence. It is rendered
more so by being in the vicinity of my
charmer's native abode. This circumstance will
conduce much to my enjoyment, if I can succeed
in my plan of separating her from Mr.
Boyer. I know that my situation and mode of
life are far more pleasing to her than his, and
shall therefore trust to my appearance and address
for a reestablishment in her favor. I intend,
if possible, to ingratiate myself with her
particular friends. For this purpose, I called
last week at her mother's, to pay my respects to
her (so I told the good woman) as an object of
my particular regard; and as the parent of a
young lady, whom I had the honor to know and
admire. She received me very civilly, thanked
me for my attention, and invited me to call
whenever I had opportunity; which was the
very thing I wanted. I intend likewise, to court
popularity. I don't know but I must accept, by
and by, some lucrative office in the civil department.
Yet I cannot bear the idea of confinement
to business. It appears to me quite inconsistent
with the character of a gentleman; I am
sure it is, with that of a man of pleasure. But
something I must do; for I tell you, in confidence,
that I was obliged to mortgage this place,
because I had not wherewithal to pay for it. But
I shall manage matters very well, I have no
doubt, and keep up the appearance of affluence,
till I find some lady in a strait for a husband,
whose fortune will enable me to extricate myself
from these embarrassments. Do come
and see me, Charles; for, notwithstanding all
my gaiety and parade, I have some turns of the
hypo, some qualms of conscience, you will call
them; but I meddle not with such obsolete
words. And so good bye to you, says
