Collected poems :: :: University of Virginia Library

How much would end in mode abrupt,
If listeners might but interrupt!
Once in a corner of the lawn,
When none was stirring with the dawn,
Save Betty, who not less, alas!
Still lingered at her looking-glass,
A Tortoise of didactic habits
Addressed some half-a-dozen Rabbits.

It was a Tortoise who, 'tis said,
Contrived to break a wise man's head;
Since then the sect, report avers,
Have set up for Philosophers.

No harm in this one could be found;
He weighed so much; was so much round;
Not slower than his kin, or quicker
(Although his shell was somewhat thicker)
And wearing just that look of thought
Which speaks profundity,—or nought,

“My text (he said) is Promptitude.”
He stretched his throat, and thus pursued:
“In this discourse I hope to bring
Before you Promptitude the Thing;
Next, if my limits space afford,
I shall take Promptitude the Word;
Lastly, to make my meaning better,
I shall examine every Letter.

617

“And first, my Friends, however viewed,
How beautiful is Promptitude!
How are we quickened, roused, renewed,
By dwelling upon Promptitude!
In short, how much may we discover
By simply saying the word over!

“How much, too, in this vale below,
To this one quality we owe!
'Twas Promptitude the battles won
Of Cæsar, and Napoleon;
By Promptitude to-day we boast
The blessings of the Penny Post;
By Promptitude (I dare affirm)
The early bird secures the worm. . . .”

The Rabbits are a docile race,
And patient under commonplace;
But here, one rather puzzle-pated
In Gallic style “interpellated”:
“If Promptitude so much can do,
Why don't you try the practice, too?”

This was, as Hamlet says, “a hit”;
Clergy was posed by Mother-wit.
The Tortoise the horizon scanned;
He had no repartee at hand;
So, finding inspiration fail,
He drew his head in, then his tail.
His audience scampered off in glee:
Risu solvuntur tabulae.

1877.