University of Virginia Library

LETTER XV.

Dear Uncle Joshua — I guess by this time, its so
long since I writ home, you almost begin to think Jack
is sick or dead, or gone down to Quoddy long with uncle
Nat, or somewhere else. But you needn't think any
sich thing, for here I am sticking to Portland like wax,
and I guess I shant pull up stakes agin this one while.
The more I stay to Portland the better I like it. Its a
nation fine place; there's things enough here for any
body to see all their life time. I guess I shall tell you
something about 'em before summer's out. These Legislaters
haven't done nothin scarcely worth telling about
this most a fortnight. I've been in most every day jest
to take a squint at 'em. There was n't hardly a bit of
a quarrel to be heard of from one day's end to another.
They were all as good natured and loving as a
family of brothers, that had been living out all summer,
and had jest got home together at thanksgiving time.
They kept to work as busy as bees upon pieces of paper
that they called Bills. Sometimes they voted to read
'em once, sometimes twice, and sometimes three times.
At last the sun begun to shine so warm, that it made 'em

think of planting time, and at it they went, passing Bills
by the gross, [probably a mistake for to be engrossed, —
editor,] till they settled 'em away like a heap of corn at
a husking, before a barnful of boys and gals. And
they've got so near the bottom of the heap, they say
they shall brush out the floors in a day or two more, and
start off home. I spose they wont mind it much if they
do brush out some of the ears without husking; they've
had their frolic and their husking supper, and I guess
that's the most they come for. It seems to me, uncle
Joshua, it costs our farmers a great deal more to husk
out their law-corn every winter than it need tu. They
let tu many noisy talking fellers come to the husking.
I've always minded, when I went to a husking, that these
noisy kind of chaps seem to care a good deal more
about what they can get to eat and drink, than they du
about the corn; and them are that don't make much
fuss, are apt to husk the most and make the cleanest
work.

O dear, uncle, there's a hot time ahead. I almost
dread to think of it. I'm afraid there is going to be a
worse scrabble next summer to see who shall go to the
great State husking than there was last. The Huntonites
and Smithites are determined to have each of 'em a
governor agin next year. They've sot up their candidates
on both sides; and who in all the world should
you guess they are? The Huntonites have sot up Mr
Hunton, and the Smithites have sot up Mr Smith. You
understand what it means, I spose, to set up a candidate.
It means the same that it does at a shooting
match to set up a goose or a turkey to be fired at. The
rule of the game is that the Smithites are to fire at Mr
Hunton, and the Huntonites are to fire at Mr Smith.
They think it will take a pretty hard battle to get them
both in. But both parties say they've got the constitution
on their side, so I think likely they'll both beat.

They've been piling up a monstrous heap of ammunition

this winter, enough to keep 'em firing all summer;
and I guess it wont be long before you'll see the smoke
rising all over the State, wherever there's a newspaper.
I think these newspapers are dreadful smoky things;
they are enough to blind any body's eyes any time. I
mean all except the Daily Courier and Family Reader,
that I send my letters in; I never see much smoke in
them. But take the rest of the papers, that talk about
politics, and patriotism, and republicanism, and federalism,
and Jacksonism, and Hartford Conventionism, and
let any body read in one of 'em half an hour, and his
eyes will be so full of smoke he can't see better than an
owl in the sunshine; he would n't be able to tell the
difference between a corn-stalk and the biggest oak tree
in our pasture.

You know, uncle, these Legislaters have had some
dreadful quarrels this winter about a book they call the
constitution: and had to get the Judges of the great
Court to read it to 'em. They made such a fuss about it
I thought it must be a mighty great book, as big agin
as grandfather's great bible. But one day I see one of
the Sinneters have one, and my stars, it was n't so big
as my old spelling book. Thinks I to myself, if ax
handles will by one, I'll have one and see if I cant read
it myself. So I went into a store where they had a nation
sight of books, and asked 'em for a constitution.
They showed me some nice little ones, that they asked
a quarter of a dollar apiece for. I was out of money,
so I told the man I'd give him four good white oak ax
handles, well finished, for one: and he said, being 'twas
me, I might have it. So now I've got a constitution of
my own, and if I find I can read it, I shall let you know
something about what's in it before a great while.