 | Once Upon a Time there were Two Kings |  |
Scene Second.
—A Wood.Enter Prince Brutus and Soldiers bearing a dead bear.
Prince.
“Another fine bear slaughtered,” as they say
At all the barbers' shops from day to day.
I've had great sport, and yet I don't feel sportful;
In vain with riot I have filled the Court full.
In vain throughout the realm I rule the roast,
And mind my father no more than a post.
I can't get rid of a sensation queer—
Of something always whispering in my ear.
“What did you with your baby brother do?”
It's no use answering, “What's that to you?”
I am so bored with the eternal query,
That I'm not jolly even when I'm beery.
Song—Prince—“I'm a Gent, I'm a Gent.”
At all the barbers' shops from day to day.
I've had great sport, and yet I don't feel sportful;
In vain with riot I have filled the Court full.
In vain throughout the realm I rule the roast,
And mind my father no more than a post.
I can't get rid of a sensation queer—
Of something always whispering in my ear.
“What did you with your baby brother do?”
It's no use answering, “What's that to you?”
I am so bored with the eternal query,
That I'm not jolly even when I'm beery.
I'm a prince, I'm a prince, though I'm not so well made
As some I have seen in full puff on parade.
If I'm not quite a swell from the top to the toe,
I've a bend in my back that should make me a beau!
And although I've a sort of a cast in my eye,
Wherever I cast it, in terror folks fly!
Then thus to be bullied by conscience 'tis hard;
I might just as well be a common blackguard!
I'm a prince, I'm a prince and vice regal my style!
Yet bored with the blues like a villain so vile.
If like vulgar rogues I at conscience must wince,
What the deuce is the use of one's being a prince!
As some I have seen in full puff on parade.
If I'm not quite a swell from the top to the toe,
I've a bend in my back that should make me a beau!
And although I've a sort of a cast in my eye,
Wherever I cast it, in terror folks fly!
Then thus to be bullied by conscience 'tis hard;
I might just as well be a common blackguard!
I'm a prince, I'm a prince and vice regal my style!
Yet bored with the blues like a villain so vile.
363
What the deuce is the use of one's being a prince!
I of my stepmother got cleverly rid,
I kidnapped my brother when quite a young kid!
By a pal I could trust he was artfully bagged;
And I've reason to hope he was decently—scragged!
I now of my father have bothered the gig,
And left him with scarcely a crown to his wig!
And after all this, ain't it rather too bad
I should ever feel even approaching to sad?
I'm a prince, I'm a prince, and vice regal my style!
Yet bored with the blues like a villain most vile.
If like vulgar rogues I at conscience must wince,
What the deuce is the use of one's being a prince!
I kidnapped my brother when quite a young kid!
By a pal I could trust he was artfully bagged;
And I've reason to hope he was decently—scragged!
I now of my father have bothered the gig,
And left him with scarcely a crown to his wig!
And after all this, ain't it rather too bad
I should ever feel even approaching to sad?
I'm a prince, I'm a prince, and vice regal my style!
Yet bored with the blues like a villain most vile.
If like vulgar rogues I at conscience must wince,
What the deuce is the use of one's being a prince!
Enter Perfidius cautiously.
Per.
Your—Highness!
Prince.
Well, what fresh game have you started?
Per.
Fair game—the dear—
Prince.
What deer?
Per.
Your dear departed.
Prince.
What do you mean by this mysterious mumbling?
Per.
The Princess Carpillona—
Prince.
I feel—tumbling!
Art sure?
Per.
Cock sure!
Prince.
And not made sure of her?
Per.
I was alone—she with a lover, sir.
Prince.
A lover! and you've left her with him living!
Per.
That you might have the pleasure, sir, of giving
The coup de grace; they follow close at hand,
So please your Highness here to take your stand,
And seize the deer—on the young fox we'll rush
Behind, and so be ready for a brush.
Music—Prince and two of the Huntsmen retire behind trees—Perfidius steals off with the rest, as Princess enters, followed by Corin.
364
Follow me not—I've told you my relations
Forbid our following our inclinations.
Cor.
You lead this heart, and I must follow suit.
Princess.
My father's will you'd not have me dispute?
Cor.
Yes, for he couldn't have been compos mentis
When such a will he made!
Princess.
That argument is
Opposed to every sense of filial duty!
Urge me no more.
Cor.
(passionately)
Thus, then, too cruel beauty,
I cast from out my breast the flow'ry token
Of promise made, like pie-crust, to be broken!
(taking nosegay of gilliflowers from his vest and flinging it from him)
Princess.
Rash Corin! Do not fling those flowers away,
There is a charm in them.
(as she runs to pick them up the Prince picks them up, intercepts, and seizes her)
Prince.
My charmer! stay.
Princess.
Brutus! Oh, Corin! I am lost!
Cor.
(fiercely)
Unhand her!
Prince.
(to his Men)
Seize him! the sauce for goose is sauce for gander:
Princess.
Fly! Corin, save yourself!
Cor.
Yes, with a hook! (branaishing his sheep-hook)
As I will you.
Prince.
(to the Men, who fall back)
Shrink from a shepherd's crook?
Look to the girl! This rascal's skull I'll crack.
(advancing on Corin)
Cor.
A crook in hand is worth two in the back.
(knocks down the Prince and belabours him)
Prince.
Oh! I'm an ass—assassinated man!
Cor.
One syllable of that believe I can.
Release her (to the Hunters who have seized Princess)
, or I'll serve you both the same.
365
Per.
Will you?
Cor.
Ah, knaves!
Per.
The last trick wins the game.
(to Prince, while raising him)
How fares your Highness?
Prince.
In a shocking state.
Head-broken and back beaten almost straight;
But joint from joint I'll have the traitor torn,
Or burnt alive, as sure as he is born.
And feast my ears in turn upon his groans—
(two Attendants support Prince)
Oh! gently, gently, pray! over the stones.
Music—They carry out Prince, followed by Perfidius with Corin and Princess, prisoners.
Enter Sublimus and Pastora.
Sub.
For help I heard a cry.
Pas.
Ah! woe on woe!
Our daughter carried off by Corin!
Sub.
No!
Pas.
I tell you yes; there they both go together.
Sub.
They do; but 'pon my life I can't tell whether
He's carried her off, or she's carried him,
For he is bound, and led by ruffians grim.
Pas.
And she's bound too; but whither she's bound to,
Who knows? and you stand there—
Sub.
What can I do?
Pas.
What can you do? Run after them, and stop 'em.
Sub.
It's easy to say run— (calling)
Ho! you, sirs, drop 'em.
Pas.
They mock our agony.
Sub.
They laugh outright at us.
Pas.
And see, one low-bred fellow takes a sight at us.
Oh! that I were a man!
Sub.
I wish you were,
For his sake only—not for mine.
Pas.
Despair
Inspire me now with forty-lion power!
And railroad speed of forty miles an hour!
I'll follow them in spite of all resistance!
Sub.
I'll follow you—at a respectful distance!
(Exeunt)
| Once Upon a Time there were Two Kings | |