 | [Ralph Roister Doister] |  |
Scæna. iiij.
Custance. Merygreeke. Roister Doister.C. Custāce.
What gaudyng and foolyng is this afore my doore?
M. Mery.
May not folks be honest, pray you, though they be pore?
C. Custāce.
As that thing may be true, so rich folks may be fooles,
R. Royster.
Hir talke is as fine as she had learned in schooles.
Looke partly towarde hir, and drawe a little nere.
C. Custāce.
Get ye home idle folkes.
M. M.
Why may not we be here?
Nay and ye will haze, haze: otherwise I tell you plaine,
And ye will not haze, then giue vs our geare againe.
C. Custāce.
In deede I haue of yours much gay things God saue all.
R. Royster.
Speake gently vnto hir, and let hir take all.
M. Mery.
Ye are to tender hearted: shall she make vs dawes?
Nay dame, I will be plaine with you in my friends cause.
R. Royster.
Let all this passe sweete heart and accept my seruice.
C. Custāce.
I will not be serued with a foole in no wise,
When I choose an husbande I hope to take a man.
M. Mery.
And where will ye finde one which can doe that he can?
Now thys man towarde you being so kinde,
You not to make him an answere somewhat to his minde.
C. Custāce.
I sent him a full answere by you dyd I not?
M. Mery.
And I reported it.
C. Custance.
Nay I must speake it againe.
R. Royster.
No no, he tolde it all.
M. M.
Was I not metely plaine?
R. Royster.
Yes.
M. M.
But I would not tell all, for faith if I had
With you dame Custance ere this houre it had ben bad,
And not without cause: for this goodly personage,
Ment no lesse than to ioyne with you in mariage.
C. Custāce.
Let him wast no more labour nor sute about me.
M. Mery.
Ye know not where your preferment lieth I see,
He sending you such a token, ring and letter.
C. Custāce.
Mary here it is, ye neuer sawe a better.
M. Mery.
Let vs see your letter.
C. Custance.
Holde, reade it if ye can.
And see what letter it is to winne a woman.
M. Mery.
To mine owne deare coney birde, swete heart, and pigsny
Good Mistresse Custance present these by and by,
Of this superscription do ye blame the stile?
C. Custāce.
With the rest as good stuffe as ye redde a great while.
M. Mery.
Sweete mistresse where as I loue you nothing at all,
Regarding your substance and richesse chiefe of all,
For your personage, beautie, demeanour and wit,
Sorie to heare report of your good welfare.
For (as I heare say) suche your conditions are,
That ye be worthie fauour of no liuing man,
To be abhorred of euery honest man.
To be taken for a woman enclined to vice.
Nothing at all to Uertue gyuing hir due price,
Wherfore concerning mariage, ye are thought
Suche a fine Paragon, as nere honest man bought.
And nowe by these presentes I do you aduertise
That I am minded to marrie you in no wise.
For your goodes and substance, I coulde bee content
To take you as ye are. If ye mynde to bee my wyfe,
Ye shall be assured for the tyme of my lyfe,
I will keepe ye ryght well, from good rayment and fare,
Ye shall not be kepte but in sorowe and care.
Ye shall in no wyse lyue at your owne libertie,
Doe and say what ye lust, ye shall neuer please me,
But when ye are mery, I will be all sadde,
When ye are sory, I will be very gladde.
When ye seeke your heartes ease, I will be vnkinde,
At no tyme, in me shall ye muche gentlenesse finde.
But all things contrary to your will and minde,
Shall be done: otherwise I wyll not be behinde
To speake. And as for all them that woulde do you wrong
I will so helpe and mainteyne, ye shall not lyue long.
Nor any foolishe dolte, shall cumbre you but I.
I, who ere say nay, wyll sticke by you tyll I die.
Thus good mistresse Custance, the lorde you saue and kepe,
From me Roister Doister, whether I wake or slepe.
Who fauoureth you no lesse, (ye may be bolde)
Than this letter purporteth, which ye haue vnfolde.
C. Custāce.
Howe by this letter of loue? is it not fine?
R. Royster.
By the armes of Caleys it is none of myne.
Fie you are fowle to blame this is your owne hand.
C. Custāce.
Might not a woman be proude of such an husbande?
M. Mery.
Ah that ye would in a letter shew such despite.
R. Royster.
Oh I would I had hym here, the which did it endite.
M. Mery.
Why ye made it your selfe ye tolde me by this light.
R. Royster.
Yea I ment I wrote it myne owne selfe yesternight.
C. Custāce.
Ywis sir, I would not haue sent you such a mocke.
R. Royster.
Ye may so take it, but I ment it not so by cocke.
M. Mery.
Who can blame this woman to fume and frette and rage?
Tut, tut, your selfe nowe haue marde your owne marriage.
Well, yet mistresse Custance, if ye can this remitte,
This gentleman otherwise may your loue requitte.
C. Custāce.
No God be with you both, and seeke no more to me.
Exeat.
R. Royster.
Wough, she is gone for euer, I shall hir no more see.
M. Mery.
What weepe? fye for shame, and blubber? for manhods sake,
Neuer lette your foe so muche pleasure of you take.
Rather play the mans parte, and doe loue refraine.
If she despise you een despise ye hir againe.
R. Royster.
By gosse and for thy sake I defye hir in deede.
M. Mery.
Yea and perchaunce that way ye shall much sooner speede,
For one madde propretie these women haue in fey,
When ye will, they will not: Will not ye, then will they.
Ah foolishe woman, ah moste vnluckie Custance,
Ah vnfortunate woman, ah pieuishe Custance,
Art thou to thine harmes so obstinately bent,
That thou canst not see where lieth thine high preferment?
Canst thou not lub dis man, which coulde lub dee so well?
Art thou so much thine own foe.
R. R.
Thou dost the truth tell.
M. Mery.
Wel I lamēt.
R. R.
So do I.
M M.
Wherfor?
R R.
For this thing
Bicause she is gone.
M. M.
I mourne for an other thing.
R. Royster.
What is it Merygreeke, wherfore thou dost griefe take?
M. Mery.
That I am not a woman my selfe for your sake,
I would haue you my selfe, and a strawe for yond Gill,
And mocke much of you though it were against my will.
As so to refuse suche a goodly personage.
R. Royster.
In faith I heartily thanke thee Merygreeke.
M. Mery.
And I were a woman.
R. R.
Thou wouldest to me seeke.
M. Mery.
For though I say it, a goodly person ye bee.
R. Royster.
No, no.
M. M.
Yes a goodly man as ere I dyd see.
R. Royster.
No, I am a poore homely man as God made mee.
M. Mery.
By the faith that I owe to God sir, but ye bee.
Woulde I might for your sake, spende a thousande pound land.
R. Royster.
I dare say thou wouldest haue me to thy husbande.
M. Mery.
Yea: And I were the fairest lady in the shiere,
And knewe you as I know you, and see you nowe here,
Well I say no more.
R. R.
Gramercies with all my hart.
M. Mery.
But since that can not be, will ye play a wise parte?
R. Royster.
How should I?
M. M.
Refraine from Custance a while now.
And I warrant hir soone right glad to seeke to you,
Ye shall see hir anon come on hir knees creeping,
And pray you to be good to hir salte teares weeping.
R. Royster.
But what and she come not?
M. M.
In faith then farewel she.
Or else if ye be wroth, ye may auenged be.
R. Royster.
By cocks precious potsticke, and een so I shall.
I wyll vtterly destroy hir, and house and all.
But I woulde be auenged in the meane space,
On that vile scribler, that did my wowyng disgrace.
M. Mery.
Scribler (ko you) in deede he is worthy no lesse.
I will call hym to you, and ye bidde me doubtlesse.
R. Royster.
Yes, for although he had as many liues,
As a thousande widowes, and a thousande wiues,
As a thousande lyons, and a thousand rattes,
A thousande wolues, and a thousande cattes,
A thousande bulles, and a thousande calues,
And a thousande legions diuided in halues,
He shall neuer scape death on my swordes point,
Though I shoulde be torne therfore ioynt by ioynt.
Nay, if ye will kyll him, I will not fette him,
I will not in so muche extremitie sette him,
He may yet amende sir, and be an honest man,
Therfore pardon him good soule, as muche as ye can.
R. Royster.
Well, for thy sake, this once with his lyfe he shall passe,
But I wyll hewe hym all to pieces by the Masse.
M. Mery.
Nay fayth ye shall promise that he shall no harme haue,
Else I will not fet him.
R. R.
I shall so God me saue.
But I may chide him a good.
M. M.
Yea that do hardely.
R. Royster.
Go then.
M. M.
I returne, and bring him to you by & by.
Ex.
| [Ralph Roister Doister] | |