The poetical works of John Godfrey Saxe Household Edition : with illustrations |
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ODE TO THE LEGISLATURE.
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 | The poetical works of John Godfrey Saxe |  |
ODE TO THE LEGISLATURE.
ON THE EXPIRATION OF THE “HUNDRED DAYS.”
O wise Assembly! and O wiser Senate!
I much rejoice to pen it,—
The Hundred Days in which you lived in clover
Are gone and over!
Gone are the Legislators, great and small;
Clerks, Ushers, Porters, Messengers, and all
The crowd of country cousins in the hall!
Gone are the vultures, large and little;
Gone are the venders of cold victual;
Gone are the ladies, short and tall,
The virtuous and the vicious,
The meritorious and the meretricious,
Who follow their vocations
Where you resort;
In short,
The Apple-women, and the sort
With other appellations!
Gone is the patient, patriotic “Lobby”;
Some, who have bagged their game
Laden with wealth—and shame;
And others, leading home their lame
And ill-conditioned hobby,
A little leaner than it came!
I much rejoice to pen it,—
The Hundred Days in which you lived in clover
Are gone and over!
Gone are the Legislators, great and small;
Clerks, Ushers, Porters, Messengers, and all
The crowd of country cousins in the hall!
Gone are the vultures, large and little;
Gone are the venders of cold victual;
Gone are the ladies, short and tall,
The virtuous and the vicious,
The meritorious and the meretricious,
Who follow their vocations
Where you resort;
In short,
The Apple-women, and the sort
With other appellations!
Gone is the patient, patriotic “Lobby”;
Some, who have bagged their game
Laden with wealth—and shame;
And others, leading home their lame
And ill-conditioned hobby,
A little leaner than it came!
Gone, too, the Sharps and Flats who swarm
In secret sessions, and perform
“Feats of the Ring”
Unequaled elsewhere,—not the sort of thing
Where human features catch defacing blows,—
But meaner feats than those,
Degrading legislative Ayes and Noes!
In secret sessions, and perform
“Feats of the Ring”
Unequaled elsewhere,—not the sort of thing
Where human features catch defacing blows,—
But meaner feats than those,
Degrading legislative Ayes and Noes!
O famous Hundred!—
In which (while “rural districts” wondered)
Your little Tullys thundered,
Your Hectors blustered, and your Solons blundered,
And Buncombe—honest ass! was praised—and plundered!
To think! what wind and muscle were expended
(Mere money not to mention)
In quieting dissension!
What righteous bills opposed, and bad defended;
What Acts (and facts) were made and marred and mended
Before the Session ended!
In which (while “rural districts” wondered)
Your little Tullys thundered,
Your Hectors blustered, and your Solons blundered,
And Buncombe—honest ass! was praised—and plundered!
To think! what wind and muscle were expended
(Mere money not to mention)
In quieting dissension!
What righteous bills opposed, and bad defended;
What Acts (and facts) were made and marred and mended
Before the Session ended!
They say, O Legislature! in despite
Of all adverse appearances, you might
Have been much weaker.
(How? I have asked,—but all in vain;
None could, or would, explain!)
But this I freely own, —you had a “Speaker”
That justified the title, and could speak,
In speeches neither few nor weak;
And though he often pained us,—
When at his highest pitch of declamation,
The man's oration, and vocif-oration,
Were really Tremain-dous!
Of all adverse appearances, you might
Have been much weaker.
(How? I have asked,—but all in vain;
None could, or would, explain!)
But this I freely own, —you had a “Speaker”
That justified the title, and could speak,
In speeches neither few nor weak;
And though he often pained us,—
When at his highest pitch of declamation,
The man's oration, and vocif-oration,
Were really Tremain-dous!
Perhaps, O Legislature! since your pay
Is rather small
(I mean, of course, the regular per diem
And not the price of votes when brokers buy 'em),
You saw the Hundredth day
With pleasure, after all.
If so, I will not hint,—there 's little need,—
You and the people were, for once, agreed!
Is rather small
(I mean, of course, the regular per diem
And not the price of votes when brokers buy 'em),
You saw the Hundredth day
With pleasure, after all.
If so, I will not hint,—there 's little need,—
You and the people were, for once, agreed!
Farewell, O Senate! and Assembly, too!
Good-by! adios! a-Dio! adieu!
(I don't say au revoir!)
With common-sense I would n't be at war.
That Legislatures come, it needs must be,
And go, thank Heaven!) but when I see
Your Ways and Means, I think
Of what, upon a time, a person said
Touching an article we eat and drink:
If you 'd enjoy (quoth he) your gingerbread,
Or sip your sweetened coffee with delight,
Of sugar-making pray avoid the sight!
Good-by! adios! a-Dio! adieu!
(I don't say au revoir!)
With common-sense I would n't be at war.
104
And go, thank Heaven!) but when I see
Your Ways and Means, I think
Of what, upon a time, a person said
Touching an article we eat and drink:
If you 'd enjoy (quoth he) your gingerbread,
Or sip your sweetened coffee with delight,
Of sugar-making pray avoid the sight!
And thus, with greater cause,
Would we respect the Laws
(Which should be reverenced to be obeyed),
It is n't best to see them made!
Would we respect the Laws
(Which should be reverenced to be obeyed),
It is n't best to see them made!
| The poetical works of John Godfrey Saxe | |