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The Ingoldsby Legends

or, Mirth and Marvels. By Thomas Ingoldsby [i.e. R. H. Barham]

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MORAL.

This Legend sound maxims exemplifies—e.g.

1mo.

Should anything tease you, Annoy, or displease you,
Remember what Lilly says, “Animum rege!”
And as for that shocking bad habit of swearing,—
In all good society voted past bearing,—
Eschew it! and leave it to dustmen and mobs,
Nor commit yourself much beyond “Zooks!” or
“Odsbobs!”

2do.

When asked out to dine by a Person of Quality,
Mind, and observe the most strict punctuality!
For should you come late, And make dinner wait,
And the victuals get cold, you'll incur, sure as fate,
The Master's displeasure, the Mistress's hate.
And—though both may, perhaps, be too well-bred to swear,—
They'll heartily wish you— I need not say Where.

3tio.

Look well to your Maid-servants!—say you expect them
To see to the children, and not to neglect them!

170

And if you're a widower, just throw a cursory
Glance in, at times, when you go near the Nursery.
—Perhaps it's as well to keep children from plums,
And from pears in the season,—and sucking their thumbs!

4to.

To sum up the whole with a “Saw” of much use,
Be just and be generous,—don't be profuse!
Pay the debts that you owe,—keep your word to your friends,
But—don't set your candles alight at both ends!!
For of this be assured, if you “go it” too fast,
You'll be “dish'd” like Sir Guy, And like him perhaps, die
A poor, old, half-starved, Country Parson at last!
 

Animum rege! qui nisi paret, imperat.—Lilly's Grammar.