 | May Fair |  |
Yet, seated by an Edinbro' dame
Away at once goes all your fame:
In vain you've woo'd the classic muse,
You're nothing in the land of trews;
In vain before your Oxford quorum
You've worked the Typ: Barytonorum,
Or all your cerebellum puzzled
To find in logic reason muzzled,
While Davison the disputations
Made all your syllogisms fugacious;
In vain Darii and Bocardo,
Unless you've thumb'd our friend Ricardo;
Your Wisdom's in a genuine stew,
Unless you've read the last Review.
What know you of the safety-valve?
How schistus splits, or camels calve?
How modern population thickens?
How stoves increase the breed of chickens?
How nature in her human sluices
Makes gastric and th'et cetera juices?
How every blue-bell has its spouse,
True to its vegetable vows?
How hornstein, trap, and selenite,
Were made before earth saw the light?
How true philosophy exposes
The terrible mistakes of Moses?—
How cows communicate their thoughts?
How all the lights of Earth are Scots?
Away at once goes all your fame:
173
You're nothing in the land of trews;
In vain before your Oxford quorum
You've worked the Typ: Barytonorum,
Or all your cerebellum puzzled
To find in logic reason muzzled,
While Davison the disputations
Made all your syllogisms fugacious;
174
Unless you've thumb'd our friend Ricardo;
Your Wisdom's in a genuine stew,
Unless you've read the last Review.
What know you of the safety-valve?
How schistus splits, or camels calve?
How modern population thickens?
How stoves increase the breed of chickens?
How nature in her human sluices
Makes gastric and th'et cetera juices?
How every blue-bell has its spouse,
True to its vegetable vows?
How hornstein, trap, and selenite,
Were made before earth saw the light?
How true philosophy exposes
The terrible mistakes of Moses?—
175
How all the lights of Earth are Scots?
| May Fair | |