University of Virginia Library

3. CHAP. III.

Having travelled this day without
any remarkable occurence, and puting
up at an inn in the evening, Duncan
had taken care of the horse, in having him
well rubbed down, and having seen his oats
given him, and the rack well filled with hay.
A gentlemen had also that evening put up
at the inn, and whose servant had been engaged
at the same time with Duncan, in
taking care of his respective master's horse.
This valet, whether from reading Thomas
Paine's Age of Reason, which had been
published about this time, or to the sceptical
conversation of some one in his way,
was far from being orthodox in his notions
of religion; or rather was sceptical with
regard to religion altogether; and had not
been accustomed to the strictest propriety
in the choice of his expressions; which became
apparent, in a short time, from his
use of suppletives that are common with
pro-

profane men, when they would enforce
what they have asserted; or when prompted
by passion, they are carried beyond the
bounds of decorum, in imprecations on
themselves or the incidental cause of their
injury. Whether the horse had not maintained
a proper position in currying him,
or that the valet thought he did not, is uncertain;
but so it was, that in the course
of his labour he broke out into occasional
sallies of ill humour; or perhaps, from mere
habit, and without any cause at all, he began
to damn the soul of the beast. Duncan
could not avoid taking notice of it, and
reprimanding him for his profanity. The
other gave him no other thanks than to
damn his soul also; which language began
to raise the blood of Duncan; but he repressed
his resentment for the present, and
was silent until they both came to sit down
to supper in the kitchen of the public
house, the gentlemen above having already
supped; when Roderick, for that was the
name of the valet, began to eat, not having
first said grace. At this Duncan losing
all patience, broke out upon him. Sirrah,
said he, I could make an excuse for your
damning the soul o' your beast; because I
dinna believe he has a soul, and in that
cafe
case ye were doing nothing mare than
making use o' a bad expression; but ha' ye
na mare decency, than to fall to your meat
without asking a blessing on what is set before
you; more than your horse i' the stable,
when he falls to his oats? what could
ye expect frae a dumb beast? but with ane
o' the shape o' a Christian creature, it favours
o' infidelity. Ha' ye na sense o' religion?
Did ye never see the Confession o'
Faith; or the Larger or Shorter Catechism?
Are ye na afraid, the devil will get
power o'er you, and make ye hang yoursel.

Hang the devil, said Roderick. I am
not afraid of the devil; I could kick him,
and cuff him, and play hell with him.

Guid deliver us! what blasphemy, said
Duncan; I am afraid young man, ye may
get a trial o't, you'l see then wha o' ye
will be uppermost. I'll lay my lug for it,
ye dinna stand him twa shakes, for a sae
stout as ye are. Ye had better seek the Lord,
and be out o' the reach o' Satan.

I never saw any greater devil than myself,
said Roderick; nor do I believe there
is any, I wish I saw this Satan of yours; I
would take a knock with him; I would
bite, and gouge him, and,—

This he said jumping to his feet, ſtretching

out his hands towards Duncan, and
grinning at the same time.

Duncan could sustain it no longer, but
making his escape from the kitchen, ran
to the chamber where the Captain was with
the gentlemen, taking a glass after supper:
Exclaiming with great vehemence, he gave
them to understand that the muckle deel
himsel was in the house below stairs. I did
na just see his horns, and his cloven foot,
said he; but I ken him right weel by his
way o' talking, when he was i' the stable
wie the gentleman's horse, rubbing him
down, he cursed, and swear'd like a devil;
and when he came to sipper, he could
na bide the blessing, but when I spake o'
grace, he brake out into profane language;
and at last fairly acknowledged that he was
the deel himsel. Guid guide us, that we
should hae the devil among us! I wad na
be astonished if he has the kitchen aff in a
flame o' fire, before we gae to bed yet. I
hae Satan's invisible kingdom discovered
wi' me, in my bags. It gies great account
o' thesethings. The like happened at Drumalawrig
ance before; and the guid folk
had a great deal o' wark to get the muckle
thief out o' their sight again.

The Captain and gentleman were at a loss
to

to understand this rhapsody; and could
only in general collect from it, that he
conceived himself to have seen the devil.
Where is this devil? said the Captain. Can
ye shew him to us, Duncan? I can soon
do that, said Duncan. I left him i' the
kitchen at his meat; but I trow he does na
eat muckle. It is a' a pretence, to pass for
one o' us. But gin ye sing a psalm, or
pronounce a verse o' the Bible, or gae about
prayer, I sall warrant ye sall soon see
him in his proper figure, wi' his horns and
his cloven foot girnning at ye, just as he
had come out o' hell about an hour ago.

Let us see him, Duncan, said the Captain,
and examine into these circumstances.

The Captain and the gentleman had
supposed that some wag, amongst the servants
of the public house, had been attempting
to amuse himself with the credulity
of Duncan, having discovered him to
be of a superstitious cast of mind; and that
with some kind of vizor to the face, and
uncouth dress to the person, he had assumed
a frightful form, and imposed upon him
the idea of a demon. Under this impression
they went forward, Duncan with fear
and trembling, lurking behind, and eyeing
ing

carefully the scene as they approached.
Entering the kitchen, Duncan started,
and exclaimed, The Lord deliver
us! there he is, eating at his meat, as if
he was a creature above ground, though
ye may all see that he has the physiognomy
of Belzebub. Of whom do you speak, said
the Captain? of that muckle chiel there,
said Duncan, i' the blue jacket, and the
lang breeks;—(it was a pair of overalls);—
that Satan-luking fallow, continued he,
wha puts the bread in his mouth, and sits
wi' his backside on a stool, as if he were
ane o' oursels; and had na been i' the
bottomless pit these twelve months. But
gin ye speak till him, I sall warrant ye
sal soon hear him talk the dialect of hell,
and curse and swear like a fiend, and girn
like the deel himsel; and shew his cloven
foot very soon, tak my word for't.

Why that is my servant, said the gentleman.

Ay, ay, said Duncan, I dinna doubt
that; he may hae passed himsel for your
servant. But that does na hinder him to
be the de'el. Dinna ye hear what the apostle
says, “he can transform himself into
an angel o' light.” It canna be a great
trouble then to take the shape o' a waiting
man,

man, and sit before a pair o' saddle bags.
If ye read Satan's invisible kingdom discovered,
which I hae in my portmantles,
ye sal find that the devil can make himself
a minister, and gae into the pulpit, and
conduct himself very weel, aye'till it comes
to the prayer, and then off he gaes thro'
the window, or takes the gavel o' the house
wie him. It happened once at Linlithgo,
that he tuke the shape o' a guid auld
man, the reverend doctor Bunnetin, and
undertook to preach the action sermon at
a sacrament; but gaed awa in a flight o'
fire, just as he came to gie out the text.
Ah, sirrah, said he, addressing himself to
Roderick, are ye there yet? ye think because
the folk here in America dinna ken
ye, no ha'ing Satan's invisible world discovered
among their printed bukes, that
for that reason, I wad na ken ye. I ken
ye weel enough, auld Reeky. Gae back,
to Scotland, and take the shape o' muckle
dogs there, whare there are guid foks
that dinna sear ye; and no come o'er the
burn till America, where the gospel is na
yet planted, and there is na need for ye.

What have you been doing to this man,
said the gentleman to Roderick, that he
has conceived you to be the devil.No.

Nothing more said the valet, than that
when we sat down to eat he insisted on
saying prayers first, and talked like a fool
about religion. I was hungry, and did
not like to wait for prayers. He talked
about the deel. I told him I was the devil
myself. He took me to be in earnest,
I suppose; that is all.

Aye, and ye are the deel, said Duncan.
Put out your foot here, and let us see if it
hae a cloven place i' the middle o't, or be
like a christian's foot; or try if ye can stand
till I say the Lord's prayer; though I wad
na wish to say it, as I dinna ken but ye wad
take the man's house wi' ye, and leave the
Captain, and this gentleman without a
chamber to gae to bed in. PshaDuncan, said
the Captain; how can such ideas come into
your brain? I see nothing, but the gentleman's
servant. It is the prejudice of your
education, to suppose that the devil can
take the shape of men, or tangible substance;
at least that he can eat food, and
converse with a human voice, You will
come by and bye to have a better sense of
things. In the mean time we must excuse
your revereis, as you are but a late emigrant.
This valet may be indiscreet, or
as you would say, profane, in his expreſſsions;

a thing of which I will venture to
say this gentleman, whose waiting man
he is, does by no means approve. Nevertheless,
I cannot think he is Apolyon,
or Belzebub, or Satan, or the great
arch devil of the infernal regions I do
not even believe that he is one of your
inferior devils, that has assumed the shape
and function of a valet, and has sat down
here to eat his supper in the kitchen.

I am not one one of those, said the gentleman,
that approve of profane language,
or the undervaluing the religious ceremonies
of a conscientious, though weak
man; but it would appear to me that this
is but an affair of humour on the part of
my valet, who by the by is but hired with
me as a waiting man, and I have no controul
over him, farther than to dismiss him
for improper conduct. He is a merry fellow;
but I have always found him faithful,
and of good temper; so that I will venture
to say, that if Duncan, for that I understand
is the name of this North Briton, will take
supper, and go to bed with him, he will receive
no injury whatever.

I wad na take the whole town o' Perth,
to sit down wie him, said Duncan; nor a'
the kingdom of Scotland to sleep wie him
ae

ae night. I should expect nothing else but
to be i' the lake o' brimstane before the
morning.

I will be damn'd said Roderick, if I do
you any damage. I am no devil more than
yourself. It was to get quit of your long
prayers before victuals, that led me to talk
as I have done.

Do you hear him, said Duncan? would
any body but the deel, acknowledge himself
willing to be dam'd, or talk about it
in sae light a manner. He confirms by ae
breath, what he denies by the other. He
is the deel, as sure as ever Mitchel Scot
was in Scotland, or if he is na the deel;
he is as bad as the deel, and it gaes against the grain wi' me to hae ony communication
wi' him. Let him gae to hell for me
by himself. He sal not hae my company.
I wad na trust but that he wad hae an
hundred witches here about the house, before
the morning, and put every one o' us
on a broomstick to ride along wi' him, taking
the taps aff the trees, and dinging
floon houses, as he gaes along; the auld
woman turning themselves into cats, as
they like, or taking the shapes o' hares, or
swimming o'er rivers in their egg-shells.

The Captain finding that it was in vain
to

to attempt by direct means to overcome the
force of prejudice, changed his language,
and affected to suppose that the valet might
be the devil, and proposed to examine the
extremity of both limbs, to see whether he
had a cloven foot. The valet, summitting to
the jest, agreed to be examined. His
boots and stockings therefore being stripped
off, his feet were examined, and no sissure
appeared more than in a common
foot. Now, said the Captain, if he can
stand the recital of a prayer, will you not
acknowledge that he may be a human person.
Ay, if 'twere a minister, said Duncan;
but I dinna ken, if the prayer o' a layman,
can affect him much. But it does
na matter muckle, whether he is the devil
or not; he is amaist as bad as the devil,
as you may distinguish by his conversation,
and I dinna care to ha muckle more to do
wie him.

That is, devil or no devil, said the
Captain, you will neither eat nor sleep with
him.

Just the short and the lang o' it, said
Duncan. I will take a bit o' bread and
beef in my hand, and creep into some
nuke by mysel, if it should be i' the stable
with the horses, rather than wie this wicked
crea

creature, that if he is not Satan, has a great
resemblance o' him.

With this the Captain and the gentlemen,
left them to themselves, and returned
to the chamber.