University of Virginia Library

Woodford [illeg.] wrote me, & I
answered; result, this arrangement:

5th Regular toast:
Woman — God bless her!
Response by Mark Twain.

You see, I never use any name but my
nom de guerre on public occasions.)

Woodford says that if President
aArthur is not on hand, I'll be No.
5 — otherwise I am to be No. 6. It
gives me the belly-ache to wait long with
a speech in my bowels.

I threw aside all my other sub-
jects — they were too solemn. As
this is to be my last speech, with the
exception of one next August which

is to fulfill a promise 3 years
old, I thought I would like to
wind up with an obituary
with the right amount of non-
sense in it.