University of Virginia Library

11. CHAPTER XI.

THE old devil, having finished with the sec-
ond brother, went to Ivan the Fool. This time
he disguised himself as a General, the same as
in the case of Simeon, and, appearing before
Ivan, said: "Get an army together. It is dis-
graceful for the ruler of a kingdom to be without
an army. You call your people to assemble,
and I will form them into a fine large army."

Ivan took the supposed General's advice, and
said: "Well, you may form my people into an
army, but you must also teach them to sing the
songs I like."

The old devil then went through Ivan's
kingdom to secure recruits for the army, saying:

"Come, shave your heads [the heads of recruits
are always shaved in Russia] and I will give

each of you a red hat and plenty of vodki"
(whiskey).

At this the fools only laughed, and said:

"We can have all the vodki we want, for we dis-
till it ourselves; and of hats, our little girls
make all we want, of any color we please, and
with handsome fringes."

Thus was the devil foiled in securing recruits
for his army; so he returned to Ivan and said:

"Your fools will not volunteer to be soldiers.

It will therefore be necessary to force them."

"Very well," replied Ivan, "you may use
force if you want to."

The old devil then announced that all the
fools must become soldiers, and those who re-
fused, Ivan would punish with death.

The fools went to the General; and said:

"You tell us that Ivan will punish with death
all those who refuse to become soldiers, but you
have omitted to state what will be done with
us soldiers. We have been told that we are
only to be killed."

"Yes, that is true," was the reply.

The fools on hearing this became stubborn
and refused to go.

"Better kill us now if we cannot avoid death,
but we will not become soldiers," they declared.

"Oh! you fools," said the old devil, "soldiers
may and may not be killed; but if you disobey
Ivan's orders you will find certain death at his
hands."

The fools remained absorbed in thought for
some time and finally went to Ivan to question
him in regard to the matter.

On arriving at his house they said: "A Gen-
eral came to us with an order from you that we
were all to become soldiers, and if we refused
you were to punish us with death. Is it true?"

Ivan began to laugh heartily on hearing this,
and said: "Well, how I alone can punish you
with death is something I cannot understand.

If I was not a fool myself I would be able to
explain it to you, but as it is I cannot."

"Well, then, we will not go," they said.

"Very well," replied Ivan, "you need not
become soldiers unless you wish to."

The old devil, seeing his schemes about to
prove failures, went to the ruler of Tarakania
and became his friend, saying: "Let us go and
conquer Ivan's kingdom. He has no money,
but he has plenty of cattle, provisions, and
various other things that would be useful to
us."

The Tarakanian ruler gathered his large
army together, and equipping it with cannons
and rifles, crossed the boundary line into Ivan's
kingdom. The people went to Ivan and said:

"The ruler of Tarakania is here with a large
army to fight us."

"Let them come," replied Ivan.

The Tarakanian ruler, after crossing the line
into Ivan's kingdom, looked in vain for sol-
diers to fight against; and waiting some time
and none appearing, he sent his own warriors
to attack the villages.

They soon reached the first village, which

they began to plunder. The fools of both sexes
looked calmly on, offering not the least resist-
ance when their cattle and provisions were
being taken from them. On the contrary, they
invited the soldiers to come and live with them,
saying: "If you, dear friends, find it is difficult
to earn a living in your own land, come and
live with us, where everything is plentiful."

The soldiers decided to remain, finding the
people happy and prosperous, with enough sur-
plus food to supply many of their neighbors.

They were surprised at the cordial greetings
which they everywhere received, and, return-
ing to the ruler of Tarakania, they said: "We
cannot fight with these people—take us to
another place. We would much prefer the
dangers of actual warfare to this unsoldierly
method of subduing the village."

The Tarakanian ruler, becoming enraged,
ordered the soldiers to destroy the whole king-
dom, plunder the villages, burn the houses and
provisions, and slaughter the cattle.

"Should you disobey my orders," said he, "I
will have every one of you executed.''

The soldiers, becoming frightened, started to
do as they were ordered, but the fools wept
bitterly, offering no resistance, men, women,
and children all joining in the general lamen-
tation.

"Why do you treat us so cruelly?" they cried
to the invading soldiers. "Why do you wish to
destroy everything we have? If you have more
need of these things than we have, why not
take them with you and leave us in peace?"

The soldiers, becoming saddened with re-
morse, refused further to pursue their path of
destruction—the entire army scattering in many
directions.