112. CHAPTER CXII.
THE SINGULAR INVITATION TO THE BARON'S WEDDING.
About three days after the transactions which we have just recorded, the
admiral received a call from his friend, the attorney, and that call had a
double object.
In the first place, the man of law wanted to tell him how he was
proceeding, as regarded the Quaker, and there they had a great tussel about
what was to be done, for, when the attorney said to him,
"Now, admiral, as regards this assault upon Mr. Shepperd, all that can be
done is to let him prove his case, and then come up for judgment, and move in
the court in mitigation. I dare say, you will dragged up to Westminster Hall
for judgment, and I should not at all wonder, but you will get off with a fine
of six-and-eightpence."
"What do you mean," said the admiral, "by letting him do what he likes?"
"In effect, it is the same thing as pleading guilty, you know, to a
charge brought against you, and, by so doing, you, to a great extent, disarm
justice."
"Guilty!" roared the admiral; "guilty! You will be a long time, indeed,
in convincing me that there is any guilt in kicking a Quaker, and especially
such a Quaker as Mr. Shepperd. Why, I'll do it again, and think it, as I do
now, a meritorious action."
"Yes; but you misunderstand me. It's called guilt, you know, in law, to
do anything contrary to law; and, by pleading guilty, you do no more than just
admit the fact that you have kicked the Quaker."
"That's quite another thing. I have no objection to the fact, whatever,
but don't call it being guilty, for that's all moonshine, and I won't have it,
at any price. Guilty be hanged! I think I see it. Guilty of kicking a
Quaker, indeed; I have half a mind to go and kick him again, just on purpose;
and I don't know but what I may do it yet."
"Well, well, admiral, now that we have settled that knotty point, I have
got something else to tell you, of a more agreeable nature."
"Out with it—out with it."
"It is this. You recollect that, upon the marriage of Miss Flora
Bannerworth with your nephew, Mr. Charles Holland—"
"The marriage feast, you mean, for, as far as the marriage was concerned,
they all got the better of the old man."
"Yes; the marriage feast. You recollect that, upon that occasion, you
gave me leave to invite a number of persons, all of whom were very grateful,
and thought very highly of you and the honour of coming into your company."
"A devil of a sensible fellow this lawyer is," thought the admiral.
"It's enough to make one take to lawyers, I'll be hanged if it ain't. Go
on—go on; what of all that? I am sure I was as well pleased to see them all
as they were to see me."
"Well, sir, it appears that some of these persons, and especially a
family of the name of Clark, have been exceedingly anxious to bestow some
civility upon you in return; and, as they have been invited to a wedding, they
wish to prevail upon you to go with them, as it will be a very stylish
affair."
"Well, I don't mind," said the admiral. "Where is it?"
"It's as far as twenty miles off, at a place called Anderbury, and it is
wished that you should bring anybody you like with you, upon the occasion."
"Well, it's civil, at all events, and I don't mind, if Henry and Charles
and Flora like it, going. But, when you mention Anderbury, I'll be hanged if
I don't think it's the very place that Jack Pringle has gone to, to get a
sight of the salt water, for the benefit of his health."
"Well, sir, it will have none the less recommendation to you, I dare say,
that it is close to the sea."
"You are right there, and, I can tell you, I was thinking of going
myself, because you know, what suits Jack, in those respects, is pretty well
sure to suit me; and I thought, as that vagabound was enjoying himself down by
the sea coast, I might as well go and do so likewise."
"Well, sir, then I may consider I have your full consent to the
arrangement, and I am sure it will be received by the parties with a great
deal of satisfaction, indeed."
"Well, well, somehow or another, you talk me over to things, so I'll go,
without making any more fuss about it; and I will take Henry with me, and
Charles, and Flora, and I'd take old Varney, the Vampyre, too, if we had him
here. It would be a good bit of fun to take such a fellow as that to a
wedding."
"He would not be the most welcome guest in the world."
"No; I should think not. But who are our invitations to come from?"
"They will come from the bride's mother, as the people I have told you
are so anxious to take you with them are friends of hers."
"Very good—very good; so, as it's all right, I will speak to Henry
about it, and Flora, and, I dare say, we shall all manage to get there
comfortably enough. Let me see; it's just two stages for post-horses. Well,
well, lawyer, you may look upon it as decided; it is to be, and there is an
end of it."
In due course, on the following day, there came a note to Admiral Bell,
enclosing a card, on which was said,
"Mrs. Williams requests the honour of Admiral Bell's company, with his
party, to breakfast, on the 10th instant, at two o'clock, on the occasion of
the celebration of the nuptials of Miss Helen Fedora Williams with the Baron
Stolmuyer of Saltzburgh, a., a., at Anderbury-on-the-Mount."
"The devil!" said the admiral. "This is an odd affair—something
slashing, and out of the way, I should say. Breafast at two o'clock!
that's the d—dest piece of humbug in the whole affair. Who the devil is to
wait for their breakfast till two o'clock? I never heard anything better than
that; but I suppose there will be something to eat, so I shall take the
liberty of having my breakfast at seven in the morning, and calling that my
dinner, and my lunch I will manage to get at some inn on the road."
With this card of invitation in his hand, the admiral went to Flora, and
laid it before her, saying, —
"Here will be fine fun, Flora, for you. This is the invitation I spoke
to you of, and they are going to have breakfast at two o'clock, lunch, I
suppose, at five, dinner at nine, a cup of coffee at about twelve, supper at
four o'clock in the morning, and I suppose they will get to bed at about
daybreak."
Flora laughed as she perused the card, and then she said,—
"It certainly promises to be quite a fine affair, uncle; and, at all
events, as we are only guests, we shall be able fully to enter into the
amusement of the affair, if there be any, and I am inclined to think there
will be, by the rather pompous reading of the card of invitation which has
been so civilly sent to us."
"If they are ridiculous people," said the admiral, "we will laugh at
them, and they cannot expect but that we should; and if they should turn out
to be otherwise, they may become very pleasant acquaintances, you know."
"Assuredly; and it will not do to judge of people always by such a
trivial piece of evidence as a card of invitation can afford to one; so I will
endeavour to go to the wedding with an impression that they are agreeable
people—an impression which, considering the complimentary manner in which
they have invited us, we ought to cultivate."
"Very good; and do you speak to Charles about it, for I have not had an
opportunity of so doing; and as the people have invited us handsomely, I think
we ought to go in a manner so as to do them as much credit as possible; and,
therefore, I should say that a coach and four, with postilions, will be the
plan, and look rather stylish."
"Oh, uncle, you will be mistaken for the bridegroom."
"Shall I? Very well, I am quite willing that I should be, always
provided I may chance to admire the bride; but if I do not, you may be sure
that I shall take pretty good care to explain the error."
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