University of Virginia Library

Scene IV.

—The outside of the Castle; Wilhelm serenading with a fiddle.
WILHELM.
This is her window. All are still as mice.
How beautiful is Elspeth—yea, how nice!
And, oh! her dimples, when they slyly come,
Dear heart, they are enough to strike one dumb.
In our short petticoats we were attached,
And once I blubbered when her nose was scratched.
I gave her all my gingerbread and candy,
And one small lock of hair, so nice and sandy;
But now she's been admired, and gone to service,
She laughs at me, and makes me very nervous.
In music, now, I'll tenderly upbraid her,
And if my nerves permit I'll serenade her.
This fiddle once, I'm told, I fingered neatly,
And it discourses music—very sweetly.
[Wilhelm sings; air, “Summer Night” (Don Pasquale.)

[Wilhelm hides.
BARON.
Bless me! I've always heard the place was haunted!
Such frightful howling—not that I am daunted.
[Comes out on the stage.
Some shocking stories I can recollect.
'Tis right we should be very circumspect;
No doubt strange characters are now about,
Such as my bumptious friend, Old Water-spout;
And when such ugly customers are going,
Who may pop in upon us there's no knowing.
Hush!—hist! What voice was that? What sudden shade
Popped out behind me? Bless me! Who's afraid?
[Sees Wilhelm going off.
Hullo! you thief! your swallow-tails I'll riddle.
Here's a nice concert of a cat and fiddle.
Ah! now I see it all—a pretty frolic.
Bless me! the fright has given me the colic.
Donner und blitzen! But he got a fright:
He'll scarcely be in tune again to-night;
I'll have a drop to warm my good old nose.
Oh, my lumbago! Oh, my gouty toes!

[Baron goes into the house; Wilhelm comes back.
WILHELM.
Alas! I'm in a tremble. It was frightful;
And I was singing to her quite delightful!
Perhaps 'twas fancy, only superstition,
That hideous, wrinkled, bloated apparition.
Oh, Elspeth! what I ventured for your sake!
My gentle fiddle shall once more awake.

[Wilhelm sings; air, “Buy a Broom.”
I've come here to-night, dear, in pitiful plight, dear,
Through danger and fright, dear, a singing to you.

Elspeth
appears at the window and sings.
I'm sick of enduring your vile troubadouring,
You don't look alluring. Poor sweetheart, adieu!
Good-bye now.

WILHELM.
Don't fly now.

ELSPETH.
Good-bye now.

WILHELM.
Don't fly now.

ELSPETH.
(Duet.)
The household you'll waken. Poor sweetheart, adieu.

WILHELM.
(Duet.)
Don't leave me forsaken, a singing to you.
Still fiddling I'll keep, dear; I'll sing you to sleep, dear;
Till morning does peep, dear, I'll sing and I'll sigh.

ELSPETH.
Your sighs are no use, sir; you're not worth abuse, sir.
Now, don't be a goose, sir. Poor sweetheart, good-bye.
Good-bye now.

WILHELM.
Don't fly now.

ELSPETH.
Good-bye now.

WILHELM.
Don't fly now.

ELSPETH.
(Duet.)
The household you'll waken. Poor sweetheart, adieu.

WILHELM.
(Duet.)
Don't leave me forsaken, a singing to you.

[Elspeth disappears; the door opens. Wilhelm rushes into the Baron's arms.
BARON.
Come, sir, give me up your fiddle, you made such a horrible rout
You've given my wife the night-mare, and aggravated my gout.

Enter Frau.
FRAU.
Good gracious me! why, Baron, what means this outlandish row?
Come, wretch, give up your fiddle: I dreamed they were killing the sow.

WILHELM.
I can't give up my fiddle. Oh, pardon, good woman, I beg.

FRAU.
Yourself, young man, and your fiddle we'll certainly lower a peg.

BARON.
Begone, rash youth, forswear these mad night capers:
Take your old fiddle, and take to your scrapers.

FRAU.
And if you can't resist your tuneful failing,
You must reserve your music for the railing.

[Exeunt L. and R.