University of Virginia Library

[Scene II.

Filadin's Tent in the King's Camp.]
Enter Filadin, Monasin, and Cratoner.
Fil.
Lett us then of our mistresses discourse.

Mon.
You could not name a subject pleas'd mee worse.
Yes, I must hate them, for they have their Eyes
To move them still the handsome men to prize.
They have their Eares too in their numerous fits
To make them Love and doat upon the witts.
They have their fancies too, I my selfe know itt,
To make them love th'inventions of the Poett.
Nay, were all these Center'd in one, they then
Have their inconstancy to love all men.

Fil.
That which in them thou as a Vice doest grant
Is what I'de quarrel with them, did they want.
Their ficklenesse I thinke a virtue rare.
Long none I keepe, nor of none long dispaire.
In mee a greater trouble it wou'd breed,
If they still lov'd than if they never did.
Their kindnesse cannot be a Joy soe high,
As afterwards is their Inconstancie.
Such quitting mee is what I most esteeme.
They doe to mee what I wou'd doe to them.
Their Change for new Amours a way does make,
Ridds mee of her I tooke, brings her I'de take.
But if these truths, which I to thee have said,
Doe want the pow'r thy reason to persuade,
And that thou yet will to fix weomen try,
Which harder is than to fix mercury,
Then marry.

Mon.
Marry! that, all wise men say,
Is to unfix them the most certaine way!
Experience showes that Women are much more
Unfixt after their marriage than before.
All ties in Love but Love, that power doe want,
And even are defective in the grant.

Crat.
Marry! that is needlesse, for if Love Comands
Their hearts to Joyne, they need noe nuptiall bands,
And if Love does not, those will hold them ill.
They are or needlesse or weake fetters still,
Things which but fright such as want witt to see
They are noe substance but a mysterie.

Mon.
An Art found out by ugly men, or old,
Who, wanting naturall Charmes to take and hold
The young and handsome, by constraint did fail
To find out bands are artificiall.

Fil.
My worthy and good freinds, pray spare your paines!
I loath soe perfectly those horrid Chaines
That I had rather much you two to see
Thrice married than that once you shou'd see mee.

Crat.
Wee thanke you, Sir, but yet it has been said
You lately were faire Calanns to wedd.

Fil.
Because a man was nere being hang'd, is't fitt
To thinke that therefore he was pleas'd with itt?
Come! thinke on Daphnis.

Mon.
Shee's a witt, reads books,
And her words are more hansome than her looks.
That woman's brought to an unhappy passe
When that her tongue is the best part shee has.
I thinke to praise a Taverne is as fitt,
For having Water, as a Woman, Witt.
They doubtlesse shou'd with other charmes be grac'd.
I grant the thing is good, but there misplac'd.
Think on Amanta, shee is very rich.

Crat.
Her Gold may charme, her Eyes will ne'er bewitch!
Faith! shee's not old enough, for I esteeme
A womans midle age her worst extreame.
In every season else wish has some scope;
In Youth ther's certainty, in age ther's hope.
Shee's old enough ugly to be, I knowe;
And young enough too long to live soe too.
And to discribe her truly, that wc h frights
Is much more vissible than what invites.
Her wealth I love, her lookes that Love destroy.
The grapes are painted worse than is the boy.
Thinke then on Cloris, who does Lovely owne
A Maids cheife beautie is discretion.

Mon.
She vainly hopes her Lovers to persuade
By her discretion, now her beauties fade.
Love ugly Women makes discreet, I knowe,
Or rather uglinesse does make men soe.
To Uglynesse nature such strength imparts,
To make it tenable, it needs not Arts.
Thinke on Calione, shee's wondrous faire,
And carries in her face a Conquering ayre.

Fil.
Prethee, noe further in her praise proceed,
For on that aire shee'd have her servants feed.
My Love with that thinn diett shee did treate,
And when I begg'd some more substantiall meate,
The very naming it shee scarce endur'd;
Soe Love like agues was by starving cur'd.
Shee's a Platonick or at least a foole.
I prais'd her body, and shee prais'd her soule.

Mon.
Thinkst thou that a Platonick is a foole?
Knowe 'tis the subtlest sect in Cupids schoole.
She who does once resigne mee up her soule
All feares to misse her body does controle,
And by it many a well meaning Maid
Has, as I know, her body oft betraid.
'Tis but a veile, suspitious men to blind.
None feares to be a Cuckold of the mind.
Thinke then on Flora, shee sings sweet and cleare.

Crat.
Love enters at the Eye, not at the Eare;
But I can Love none, for the faire are wonne
By too much time; the rest are gain'd too soone.
My stomack's nice, and if too long I'me cross'd
In what I'de tast, my appitite is lost.
I loath food needs much Cooking; if the meat
Were ready when I'de have it, I could eate.
Thinke on Arthiopa, for in her face
Sadnesse has soe much Empire and such Grace
That I cou'd never tell whether her sight
Did more forbidd my Passion, or invite.

Mon.
Alasse! my freind, I did discover soone
Shee by approaches only cou'd be wonn.
And you well knowe what I in Love performe
Is not by teadious seiges, but by storme.
Her Coynesse made mee all her sex abjure.
Where kindnesse is not, reason is my cure.

Fil.
Come! lett's be going, for I shrewdly feare,
If those wee talk'd of, our discourse shou'd heare,
Reason from them will this beliefe require,—
Where there is soe much smoke there is some fire.

Mon.
Since they will have us tell lyes to their face,
Yet, when their backs be turn'd, let truth take place.
The Common proverbe too wee else shou'd breake,
By which the loosers still have leave to speake.

Enter Thrasolin.
Thras.
Is this a time to spend in merryment
When thrice the Generall has for you sent?
I have at least this houre been round about
The Campe, endeavouring to find you out.

Crat.
You needed not have fetch'd soe long a walke.
This is our usuall place to meet and talke.
But doe you knowe what 'tis we are to doe?

Thras.
I guesse, but knowe not if my guesse be true.
Soone after from the Generall you went,
There came one in disguise into his tent,
Who to him some Intelligence did give
From Mora, where his Mistresse now does live.
I saw him very Joyfull at the News,
And after on it hee a while did muse,
Hee with some Earnistnesse Commanded mee
To call all you to him imediatly.

Mon.
If this be the designe, who ever goes
For hop'd for honour will have certaine Blowes.
Our Generall will lead on like a Sprite,
When he does both for Love and honour fight.

Fil.
Good Man, he but for one wench fights, but when
Wee take the place, each of Us will have tenn!
When townes are conquer'd by the force of Warre,
Walls first are storm'd and then the Women are.

[Exeunt.