University of Virginia Library

SCÆNA. II.

To them enter two Women Citizens.
1 Wom.
What pitty 'tis that such fine Ladies should
Have such untimely ends.

1 Cit.
D'you heare? The newes
Is certaine. They are burnt.

2 Cit.
I doe perceive it.
Pray Heark.

2 Wom.
They say Great people have their Destinies,
As well as Meaner. And they that are borne
Under a Watry Planet, to be drown'd,
Shall ne're dye in their beds.

2 Cit:
Are then, the Ladies
Drown'd, Gentlewoman?

2 Wom:
Not cast away by wrack, sir.
It seemes the Enemy way layd the Shippes
That carryed 'em, and sunke 'em.

1 Cit:
But is this certaine?

1 Wom:
Most certaine Sir, my Husbands Journey man
Came just now from the Port, and saw ten of
Their bodies swim downe with the Tide.

2 Cit:
And what
D'you heare oth' Enemies comming?

1 Wom:
They have sent
A most strange Message to the City, Sir.

1 Cit:
What is't, I pray?

1 Wom:
Why, Sir, that all rich Burgesses
Must put themselves in Tribes; And in their Chaines,
And scarlet Gownes, some three houres hence, must, in
A solemne, grave, procession, two, and two,
Your Officers before you, with their Maces,
T'enrich the entertainment, meet them at
Their Landing; where together with your Chaines,
Y'are to resigne the Keyes to all your Chests,

2 Wom:
And, then, for us; They do demand that all
Who are not rich, but yet have handsome Wives,
Shall yeild them up. How do you thinke, Sir, will
The Souldiers deale with us, like Women?

1 Wom:
I do
So feare their boisterousnesse. Will they, thinke you,
Strip us and leave us naked? Or be content
To ravish us, and let us goe?

2 Wom:
Looke, here
Doe's come my servant Pistoclerus; he
Enter Pistoc:
Can tell us more. What newes deare servant?

Pist:
Fly, fly,
The Prince is overthrowne; The Ladies are
All taken Prisoners; The Enemy is enter'd
Halfe way into the City; Your two Houses
By this are ransack't; I saw divers loads
Of Jewels, Plate, and Hangings, carryed out.

1 Cit:
But good, but good Sir, is this true?

Pist:
Is my
Name Pistoclerus?

1 Cit:
Yes, Sir.

Pist:
Then 'tis true.
Make haste and save your Daughters, or they'l else
Be put to ransomes for their Maiden heads.

1 Cit:
We thanke you Sir. Come Neighbour.

2 Cit:
Oh that ever
I did live to be rich, or see these Dayes.

Exeunt: Cit:
Pist:
Your husbands too are seiz'd on, And are threatned
To be put to the Racke, unlesse they will
Produce their Wives.

1 Wom:
Wee'l make haste to releeve them

2 Wom:
I take my leave; And shall be glad to see you
Sometimes ith' Suburbs Sir,

Pist:
I'le follow you.

Exeunt Women.
Pist:
This is call'd Comœdy, raised from Tragœdy.
Never was City in such tumult, as
I have put this into. The women want
Nothing but speares, circled with Ivy, to hold
A perfect feast to Bacchus. And to beate
Their Pans, and Kettles, up and downe the streets,
Instead of Drums, and Cymbals. The men have all
Armed themselves with what came next to hand.
I saw a Troope of Butchers marching downe
Their Shambles with their Cleavers. After them
Follow'd a Regiment of Taylors with
Their Yeards, and Bodkins. In the reare, a Company
Of Shoomakers with Awles. Each Trade takes Armes
Within its owne profession. Now will I follow
My Suburbe Mistrisse; whose husband is content
To make one oth' fifteene of us; And doth
Connive by turnes. The tamest fellow, and
So little owner of his owne Wife, that
He verily beleeves hee Cuckolds us
When he lyes with her. Amongst us there is One
Maim'd Souldier, with one legge, who still payes doubt;
And goes to bed to her with a stirrope? 'Tis
The common'st, and the prating'st Varlet, she
Cals me her Chærilus, I her my Lycoris.
She makes me tell her newes whole dayes together:
Which I, her spunge, do sucke up in my travels
From Company to Company, and doe
Enlarge with my Additions, and Notes politicke;
And then as severally disperse; And so
Draw Custome to her House; which she cal's pay.