University of Virginia Library

Actus Quartus

Scena prima.

Enter Barbarino & Machavil.
Bar.
He cannot counterfeit so much.

Mac.
I know not,
But if he do not surely he is mad;
What wild phantastick things he does, and talks
Of Eo, Meo, and Areo, names
Unheard i'th the Court before!

Bar.
Some Milain Counts
I warrant you he means by them.

Mac.
The strangest thing of all is the release
Of Brunetto, and his extraordinary love unto him,
Whom he hath caused richly to be clothed.

Bar.
And useth him as if he were his better.

Enter Horatio.
Mac.
Yonder's the man we talk of; what a change
We see! A prisoner but lately lockt up safe,
And now to be the wonder of the Court.

Hor.
Next Eo, Meo, and Areo, the Duke
Doth swear he loveth me; but who those are
I cannot tell nor learn: my Lords, good day,
Saw you his Highness lately?

Bar.
No sir.

Hora.
You speak as tho you were displeased.

Mac.
We are not well contented Sir.

Hor.
The Duke is noble, utter your grievances to him.

Bar.
So we will Sir.

Enter Trappolin
Mac.
And now Sir,
Know worthy Prince we are your loyal subjects,
And what we say is for your honour.

Trap.
If it be for my honour Ile hear you,
But be as brief as you will.

Mac.
Your Highness hath lately released Branetto.

Trap.
Tis a thing very certain.

Mac.
We doubt not but done out of clemency,
Not knowing why he lay there.

Trap.
Well, why was he put there?

Mac.

Even for your Honour sake (most Gracious
Sir) The Lady Prudentia your sister loves him.

Trap.

Say you so? So ho Puchanello, So ho!

Puch.

Who calls?

(Within.)
Bar.

His Highness; come hither presently.

Trap.

Bid the guard enter.

Enter Puchanello and the Guard.

You say Brunetto was put in prison because my sister
lov'd him, you think it good and fitting he were
there again.

Bar.

So please your Highness, yes.

Trap.

Puchanello take me these two Coxcombly
Lords into your Custody; they are never well but
when they are banishing some body, or doing some
mischief or other: Brunetto was laid in prison because
my sister lov'd him, and lay me these there

because I love them.

Mac.
Beseech your Highness not to deal so hardly
With us whom you have known so faithful to you.

Trap.

Puchanello, away with them I say: you of the
Guard see them in.

Bar.
Most worthy Prince be merciful, if we
Have done amiss twas out of ignorance.

Trap.
Sirra rogue away with them, or Ile lay up you too.

Puch.
Your Honours must have patience and walk.

Mach.
There is no remedy.

Bar.
The heavens be merciful to Florence;
VVhat ill malignant starre hath so depriv'd
Our wise and noble Duke of all his reason,
That he remembers not who are his friends?

Ex.
Hor.
The Gods be ever most propitious;
Great Sir, unto you, and continue long
Your life, chief honour of the Medices.

Trap.

Prince Horatio I am your servant, I pray you forgive
me my calling of you by your nick-name of
Brunetto; my sister hath told me you are the Son of
the Duke of Savoy, besworn unto you I am very
sorry I have not used you as befitted you, but it
was your fault that told me not who you were: I
have talked with Prudentia, and she loves you she
saies, which I am glad on, and Ile marry you as
soon as you will.

Her.
Sir, it is true I am Horatio,
Son of the Piemond Prince; but being his second,
I durst not think me worthy of such honours
As your Highness hath done me; and therefore told
None but your beauteous sister who I was.

Trap.
Enough my friend; and Prince Horatio,
Could you suppose I would deny my sister,
Though she were made of Gold and precious stones,
Unto your Highness, and to such a friend?
You do deserve a better wife then she;
She's not half good enough for you, and if
I had another sister, you should have them both.
My friend a Prince! I'm very glad i' faith,
But sorry that I did not know you such,
That I might have done you right: wood I were hang'd
If you are not far a better man then I.

Hora.
Great Prince, you do forget your self.

Trap.

Your Highness must pardon me, I do remember
my self well enough, yet Eo, Meo, aad Areo,
have made me something proudish, but howsoever
I am your servant, Prince Horat. i' faith I am
your very dutiful servant: how sa you now, the
Duke of Savoyes son! i' faith I am your poor servant
Lavin the Duke of Florence.

Hora.
I am amaz'd; he's mad:
Beseech your Highness leave, I pray you Sir.

Enter Mattemoros the Spanish Captain with petitioners.
Trap.

What have we here now, do's the Captain
bring us Morris-dancers? what lobs are these tro?

Mat.

So please your Highness, being importun'd much
these I have brought before you, that you might,
do justice.

Trap.

Captain Mattemoros, justice I'le do with all
my heart, but execution let do who will for me.

Calfshead.
Great Duke of Tuscany, vouchsafe to hear me,
For what I speak is out of conscience;
This fellow Mr. Bulflesh a Butcher, I saw
Verily with mine own eyes even yesternight
(When he was drunk) to kill my man, which he
Swore was good Beef, and he would sell it dear.

Bulf.

Sirra Puritan you are a base scoundrel, was
not I drunk in your company to make you merry?

Calfes.

But Mr. Bulflesh, you do know, and that full
well, that I praied you on my knees for your own
souls sake to drink no more, and profess'd to you
that it was a great abominable sin in you to fox
your self, or be foxed.

Bulflesh.

Goodman Calfeshead, you are a base scurvie
Companion; do you not know that for your sake
I killed your man, (yet I meant but only to beat
him soundly) because he pour'd not the wine into
your Codpiece? did not I do it out of friendship unto
you? did I not you puritan you, and you to complain?
O the ingratitude of Puritans!

Trap.

Peace both of you. Master Puritan hold your
tongue I say: wil not Calfeshead be drunk Bulflesh?

Bulf.

So please your Highness no, he will let a man

sooner hang him then make him drunk; Besides,
he is a fellow of strange opinions, and hath sent
his sonne to Geneva, to hear Iack Calvin preach.
He stole a Surpless to make his Amorosa a Smock
of; and hath writ a paultry Book against the Bishops,
printed at Amsterdam in Decimo sexto. He
will lie and steal without comparison; is both for
Boyes as well as Queans when he hath mony:
And like a true Italian Hypocrite, is for any sin or
mischief but our Drinking.

Trap.

Then know I very well how to do justice: Mr.
Calfeshead, you say the Butcher kild your man
when he was fox't, be you fox't when you will and
then kill him for't.

Calf.

Heavens defend, I nere was drunk yet, and
never will be.

Hora.

There is mad justice; he doth increase my
wonder.

Calfs.

Bless me, murther! I would not do it for the
world.

Mat.

This is strange justice, the Butcher doth very
wel deserve to be sent into the Gallies at Ligorn.

Trap.

I have done with you Mr. Puritan, you may be
gone to the Tavern; and Bulflesh you may get you
to the Shambles as soon as you will, for I have no
more to say to either of you.

Exeunt Calfsheead & Bulflesh.
I am ready for the next; speak therefore.

Barne.
Most excellent Prince, pity a childless father;
As yesterday my only Sonne did walk
Under an house, this fellow Gaffer Tiler,
Who was a working on it, did fall down
Upon my son, and kil'd him with his fall.

Tiler.

Mr. Barne be not so eager, you know I bore
your son no malice, and that it was a hundred to
one I broke not my own neck.

Trap.
This is an easie matter to conclude;
Friend Barn, you say this Gafter Tiler
Fell off a house, and so did kill your son;
I will be very upright in my justice,
Go you upon the house from whence he tumbled,
(And he shall stand beneath) and fall on him.

Mat.

And the Duke be not stark mad, I am to think
him so.

Barn.

So I may break my own neck.

Hor.

He strangely is distracted.

Trap.

Neighbour Barn, get you about your business,
for I have done with you.

Barn.

I must have patience.

Exeunt Barn and Tiler.
Trap.

Now let me make an end with these, and I
have done.

Mrs. Fine.
Daign, Noble Duke, to hear my just complaint,
I am a poor and an unfortunate widow;
This man Dick Whip, as the other day he drove
His coach, run over a little child of mine
That was playing in the street, and kild it.

Trap.
Sirra Whip, is this true?

Whip.
So please your Highness I confess it is.

Trap.

It doth not please me, nor displease me, for I

neither did it, nor was the child mine.

Whip.

It was against my will, a thing of chance,
Mrs. Fine cannot deny it.

Trap.

Mrs. Fine, you are a widow you say?

Mrs. Fine.

A poor unhappy one I am.

Trap.

You say that Whip the coachman hath kil'd
your child; and how he did it I have understood.

This is my justice, I will do you right;
Whip shall lie with you untill he get you another.

Mat.
Madder and madder.

Hora.
I cannot choose but smile.

Whip.

Most willingly, so please your Highness I am
well content to do her that satisfaction.

Mrs. Fine.

You shall be hang'd first, that you shall,
is thus my expectation fail'd?

Trap.

Mrs. Fine be rul'd, I will have justice done,
Whip shall lie with you; you may marry him
and you will: he kil'd your child, and he shall get
you another, I say but right, and Sirra Whip look
unto't, and you play the bungler and fail, you
shall to Ligorn and learn to row: Mrs. Fine be
contented, and you do not like him you might
have held your tongue, for I know no body that
sent for you, and so get you both gone.

Whip.
The Heavens preserve your Highness.

Exeunt.
Trap.
My friend and Prince Horatio, go unto
My sister, bid her to prepare her self,
I'le have you married within this day or two;
I long to see you both in bed together.

Hora.
Most willingly I will do such a message,
The Gods preserve you happily.

Exit.
Mat.
A strange discovery if true.

Trap.

Seignior Captain, I say I have done very
good justice, and in a little time too, I am not like
your scarlet coats that will do nothing without
mony; a company of fellows they are whose
beards and hearts agree not together.

Mat.

Your Highness doth dispatch things very
soon.

Trap.

Though I am the Duke yet I love to do no
hurt, as other men in authority would, I hate to
banish men as Machavil and Barb. ha done: alas
poor Trappolin, I hear they have banisht an honest
poor man cald Trap. what the Divel Seignior
Mat. came in their heads to send a poor fellow
away out of his country without any money?
though men may sometimes gather a reasonable
Sallet abroad, he shall get no oyle to eat it withall.

Mat.
Great Duke of Tuscany, our noble Master,
That Trap. of whom your Highness speaks,
Had little fault in him, (good faith) at all
Saving he was a most notorious coward.

Trap.

Why you Don of guns or pikes, do you think
every mans mind is given to the wars? Trap. was
addicted to the peace, a poor fellow full of courtesies;
one that will never deny to do a favour for
a friend: I will have a little sport with my Don
of the wars; O me, Sir Captain, look yonder: Eo,
Meo and Areo, I will put you off for a while, I

will try some conclusions.

Mat.
Your Highness! wher's the Duke gon I marle;
What Trappolin, art thou come again?
Faith many a wench in Florence will be glad;
Follow thy old trade, be a Pander still.

Trap.

Seignior Captain I am your humble slave, and
if I can do you any kindness at any time, i'faith
Don Mathemores you shall command me—and
if you have but a mind to any Beauty in Florence,
pay but me well for my pains, and her well for
hers, and I will not fail you; and Captain I can
give you a delicate poyson to dispatch any enemy
with whom you dare not fight.

Mat.
I see thou art resolv'd to be a rogue,
Tis pity that his Highness did repeal thee;
Next time I see him, sirra Pimp, I will
Make suit to have you sent into Ligorn.

Trap.

You Spanish coxcomb, go hang your self, do
your worst.

Mat.
Wer't thou a souldier I wood fight with thee,
Being a rogue thou dost deserve my foot;
Take this you rascal.

Trap.

I will presently be out of his debt—who's
yonder? it is the Duke or I am deceiv'd; Eo, Meo,
and Areo, on agen, my hat, my glass, and cloke,
sit close: how now sirra Captain, where are your
manners? what do you think of me, who am I
tro? I am not your Lieutenant am I? stoop and
take up your hat, and let me see if it will not become
your hand as well as your head in my presence.

Mat.

I did not see your Highness.

Trap.

Will you lie too? take that and learn to speak
truth.

Kicks him.
Mat.
Most Noble Prince, and my most royal Master,
Pardon the error which unwillingly
I have committed; in Tuscany there lives not
A man that freelier for your sake would lose
His life then I.

Trap.
Well, get you gone, I do
Forgive you; but my Don at armes, remember
The Duk's to be observ'd, he is the man
That doth maintain you.

Mat.
And most worthy Prince,
Did but occasion shew it self, I would
Venture and lose my life to do you service.

Exit.
Trap.

And my Father Conjurer would come into
Florence, I would make him the next man unto
my Highness; he is a good man, and it is great
pity that he should go to the Divel, as they say
Conjurers and Witches do: well, I am a brave fellow,
I love to see my self in my glass, I am the
Duke 'ifaith, the very Duke, I see me.

Enter Flametta.
Flam.

I will go and petition him agen.

Trap.

My rogue Flametta, I could kiss her to pieces,
bite off her lips, and suck out her eyes I love
her so well.

Flam.
The great Duke of Tuskany the gracious heavens
Prosper your Highness ever, I am the same
That lately did intreat for the repeal
Of my Beloved sweetheart Trappolin:
Most excellent Sir, pity my earnest suit,
And let me have my Trappolin recal'd.

Trap.

This is a very precious villain, how she loves
me! and I ever marry while I am a Duke by Eo,
Meo and Areo's leave I will have her,—your
name little maid, is Flametta, as I remember?

Flam.

So please your Highness, yes.

Trap.

You sue to have banisht Trappolin come
home?

Flam.

Most humbly, most excellent Sir, I do.

Trap.

Well 'tis all as please Eo, Meo and Areo, I
can do nothing without them, and (my young
Mistress) as long as they are in authority, I can
do little for you.

Flam.

Then by your Highness leave, do I wish Eo,
Meo, and Areo in the fire.

Trap.

Methinks they should be enough in that already,
for the Divel made them all; now I think
well on't, sometime when I have good opportunity
I will off with my things and have a little
sport with her: since, fair Maid, you are so earnest
for your sweetheart Trappolin, he shall come
home very shortly, he shall believe me, but upon
condition I will do it.

Flam.

On any condition except my honour Sir.

Trap.

That he shall lie with you.

Flam.

Were we but married, most willingly.

Trap.

If he gives you his oath to have you, will not
that suffice?

Flam.

I had rather we had married before.

Trap.

You need not fear, should he swear unto you
and break his oath, I would hang him, and
yet (though I nere mean to break my word with
her) I faith I should very hardly hang my self for
any thing; the rope is a very dismal thing.

Flam.

Shall he come home, say the word Noble
Prince.

Trap.

Well on my word he shall as soon as possibly
I can, but on that condition that you will accept
of him without marriage, upon his oath to
have you.

Flam.

I see his Highness is mad (as every body
saies) otherwise what should ail him to talk thus?
most excellent Prince, he and I would not disagree.

Trap.

Well here is my hand, he shall come home
shortly, now I must have a kiss and leave you: I
am very hungry, I ha been so long a doing justice
that I am very hungry, give me a buss sweetheart.

Kisses her.
Flam.

Heaven bless your Highness.

Exeunt severally.

sena secunda.

Enter Lavinio the great Duke, Isabella the Dutchess with Attendants.
Lav.
My hearts sweet solace, my dear Isabella
You are most welcome unto Florence;
Live according to your wishes happily,
And may I perish if I do not strive
In every thing to please you to my power;
I'm sorry at my coming home I find
Such strange and unexpected alterations,
That for to quiet them I must deprive
My self some houres of your company.

Isab.
Most Excellent Sir, I do account my self
Most highly blest, that am not onely married
Unto a Prince, but one that can
And doth vouchsafe his love unto me, being
Defective of those beauties should deserve it.
To your affairs betake you Worthy Sir,
I will expect you till your leisure serves.

Lav.
You are good unto a miracle
Sweet Isabella—attend the Dutches in;
Adieu my Love, some few but tedious minutes
Past over I will come unto you.

Isa.
I will await your leisure.

Exeunt with Isabella.
Lav.
What mad fantastick humours have possest
In general the heads of the Florentines?
They have amaz'd me, speak as if I
Had been with them before my Dutchesse came.

Barbarino and Machiavil appear in prison.
Bar.
You great commander of the Tuscan Cities,
Pity your subjects, and your loyal servants;
In what we sued for we had no design,
Neither the least intent for to offend.

Mac.
Be merciful therefore most gracious Prince,
Let not the noblest of the Florentines
VVear out their daies and thraldom in a Prison,
Being men not long ago high in your favour.

Lav.
I am lost within a Labyrinth of wonders,
I know not what to think, the chiefest of
The Florentine Nobility in prison,
And sue to me as if I had commanded
Them to this place; sure some ill spirit hath
Possest mens minds while I was absent: do you
Know me?

Bar.
Your Highness is the Duke our Master.

Lav.
Are you not called Barb. and you

Macha.
the Lords unto whom I left
The government of Tuskany in
My absence?

Mac.

We are your loyal subjects though your prisoners;
and were left your Deputies when your Highness
went to Milain.

Lav.
How came you there?

Bar.
Great Sir, you know most well,
At your command.

Lav.
I must be satisfied in this:
Puchanello so ho!

Puch.
Who calls? whats the matter I wonder.

Within.
Lav.
Release me the Lords presently, and send them
To me hither:
The more I think of these accidents,
The more I marvel how they come to pass;
The men whom I did leave here governours
Are prisoners (and which increaseth more
Amazement in me) they say it was I
That made them so; some unheard malady
Unknown unto the world before it seems,
Hath infected all my subjects with a frenzy.

Enter Barberino and Machiavil.
Bar.
He hath chang'd his humor it seems.

Mach.
And may he continue in this if it be a good one.

Lav.
I am astonished to see the things
I every minute do, especially
You two (to whom I left the weighty charge
Of rule) in prison; resolve me for heavens sake
How you came there.

Bar.
Sure he doth jest with us.

Mac.

Your Highness is disposed to be merry;
You know (most excelent Sir,) full well that none
except your self could do it.

Lav.

I do it?

Barb.

He doth things in his madness he remembers
not when he's in's right sences it seems.

Lav.
Florence I left a wise ingenious City;
But I have found it now at my return
Possessed with a strange unheard of madness:
Who put you in prison? collect your wits in't order
And answer wisely.

Mac.
I vow by the prosperity of Tuscany,
Your Highness.

Lav.
Most strange! Why did I so?

Bar.
Because we did (most gracious Sir) give notice
Unto you how the Princesse Prudentia,
Your machless beauteous sister lov'd Brunetto.

Lav.
Whom? what Brunetto!

Mac.
Your prisoner taken in the Mantoan warrs.

Lav.
My sister so forget her self! I am
Full of amazement: she that had refused
The youthfull Dukes of Modena and Parma,
Dote on a slave slighted by all the starrs!
My sister also so to lose her sences,
She that was wise, and honoured for her vertues!
Sure also this same strange infection
Of madness wood ha seis'd upon my self
If I had stayd at home. I will not now
So marvel at the common people, seeing
The most discreet of the Nobility,
And my own sister equally distracted.

Mac.

I hope he comes to himself again, he talks
something more wisely then of late.

Lav.
It is a frequent thing to see a City
Miserably groan under a heavy sickness,
To have the Plague, or fierce diseases full
Of danger, rage and even unpopulate places;
But such a general phrenzy to possess
And to distract all Florence, is a wonder,
A miracle unmach'd in historie.

Bar.

How he talks as if all we were mad, and he
had done nothing!

Lav.
Are you sure you are both in your right sences?

Mac.
Did once your Highness know us so?

Lav.
Yes.

Bar.
VVe are as free from any distraction
As ever yet we were since we were born.

Lav.

You must both of you tho give me leave to
think what I know.

Enter Mattemoros.

Ile trie an he be mad too. Cap. these Lords say I put
them in prison, how say you?

Mat.

So your Highness did—he's distracted another
way.

Lav.
Good Gods be merciful. Why?

Mat.
Because they spoke against Brunetto's liberty.

Lav.
He's in the same tale;
Though they are all deprived of their sences,
They do not differ.
But why (good Cap.) answer me a little,
Should I desire Brunetto's freedom, being
Beloved by my sister as they say?
Wood it not be a great dishonour, think you,
Unto the Family of the Medices,
That she should cast her self away upon one
VVe do neither know whom, or whence he is?
I pray you Captain, if that yet you have
Any small remnant of your wit remaining,
Reply according to it.

Mat.
And he be grown wise again, Heavens be praised.
It is a certain truth your Highness speaks,
That if your sister should bestow her self
(Being a Princesse meriting so much
For her unequal'd beauty, and her vertues)
Upon a man such as you pleas'd to mention,
It would be a great weakness in her; but you
Your self I heard (most excellent Sir)
To call Brunetto Prince Horatio,
The second Sonne unto the Duke of Savoy.

Lav.
How, I call him so! truth Captain you
Have heard these things which I did never say.

Bar.
You never heard him call Brunetto so.

Mac.
Never, this is the first time I ever heard of it.

Lav.
My wonder is so great, I do want words
VVhereby to give it vent; I see that all
My subjects being distracted think me mad.

Mat.
And more, so please your Highness, you did send
Brunetto, whom you Prince Horatio called,
Unto your sister, to bid her prepare
Her self; for you within a day or two
Would see them married.

Lav.
Enough,
Captain, I swear unto you by my Dukedome,
That rather I would send Brunetto (though
He were the Duke of Savoys second son)
To have his head struck off, then on that message
You say I did.

Mat.
He doth remember nothing.

Bar.
If the Duke be come to his right sences again,
I beseech the Gods keep him so.

Mac.
And I.

Enter Horatio and Prudentia.
Mac.
Beseech your Highness look, let your own eyes
Be witness of their mutual affection;
Behold the Princess your sister and Brunetto:
Let us withdraw where we may stand unseen,
And you shall hear them talk what I have said.

Hor.
Dear Lady, you have raised me to a fortune
So high, that when I look upon my self
I am amaz'd, and wonder at your goodness.

Pru.
Most noble Prince, let my unfeigned love
Excuse the weak expressions of my tongue;
I'm glad my Brother bears so noble a mind,
As to be willing to unite our bodies
As we have done our hearts.

Hora.
Not only willing, divine Prudentia,
But earnest for us; he doth seem to grieve
That two such faithful lovers as we are
Should live so long a sunder.

Prud.
It is a worthy nature in him.

Lav.
I can contain my self no longer: though this
Be out of madness done I will not suffer it.
Sister!

Prud.
Live long most worthy Brother happily.

Lav.
So should I wish for you, bore you a mind
Deserv'd your self.

Prud.
What mean you Sir?

Hor.
Good Heavens be kind, and do not now undo
What you have almost brought unto perfection;
I fear his madness that once favoured me;
Hath chang'd his mind to my undoing.

Lav.
I will but spend few words; are you a Son
Of the Duke of Savoys?

Hora.
Your Highness knowes I am his second.

Lav.
Whether
You are or no I care not; and if you be,
My sister once deserv'd a better husband,
And she shall rather in a Monastery
Spend all her future dayes then be your wife:
And be you what you will Sir, I will shew you
That you have wronged me, and I do not fear
The Duke of Savoy if he be your father.
Puchanello, Puchanello come hither.

Mac.
I like this.

Pru.
He's wonderfully distracted—most worthy Brother,
Be not so much unmerciful.

Lav.
Peace Prudentia, I never thought
You had so weak a reason.

Hor.
He's mad to my undoing; gracious Gods,
Soon make him leave this humour.

Bar.
I hope he's come unto himself.

Enter Pucchanello.
Lav.
Sirra, convey Brunetto into prison,
Lock him up close.

Puc.
Here's do and undo—Will our Duke nere be in his
Right sences again?

Prud.
My dear Horatio, love me still, for I
Unto thee will be constant though I die.

Hor.
Though I be tortured unto death my Dear.

Exeunt with Horatio.
Mat.
I know not what to think of these alterations.

Lav.
Thus (but the heavens assist) I hope to bring
Int' order from confusion every thing.

Exeunt Omnes.