University of Virginia Library

Scen. V.

To them Eudemus.
[Elp. fals off.
Pyl.
Eudemus ! You are welcome; I forestall
Your business, you are come t'invite me to
Your Daughters Marriage.

Eud.
Call it not her Marriage,
It is her Death, her Execution.
You'd make a fitter Queen by far than she.

Pyl.
Nature, 'tis true, intended us for Queen;
And 'tis her wrong, not ours, that wee're neglected.

Eud.
I'd willingly promote your Cause, if that
I knew but how; he hath done you more wrong
By his Refusall, than he hath my Daughter
By's Cruelty. I wonder you'r so slack:
Do you not dream of your Revenge? doth not
Your sleep each Night prompt you to right your Self?
And ev'n that prove watchfull?

Pyl.
Alas! I
Have no Accesse; my Hate knows not to Reach him.
I might betray my Self by trying it,
Shewing an idle fruitlesse spight, and make
A Noise, not knowing where my sting might enter.

Eud.
Will you assist me with your Secresie
And help, fair Pyle?

Pyl.
Any thing, Eudemus,
Loving Eudemus, any thing.

Eud.
You shall
Procure a trifle only, I'l apply it;
Somthing to kill a Rat, or some such Vermin.

Pyl.
Now you do put m'in mind of such a thing,
I can most readily furnish you; you must
Be sure to give 't him e'r he go to th' Temple.
'Twill cast him in a sleep; as soon as ever
He doth begin to Nod (I'l be in readinesse.)
You shall conduct me to him, that I may
See how it works, and if it been't enough,
I'l second it. Let not your Daughter be
About him for a World: Walk in with me,
And I'l instruct you further. Wait you there
Till I return Elpidia.

[Ex. Eud. Pyl.
Elp.
Lord, to see
How many Husband's one may have that's rich!
They do swarm hither with their Veases, like
Town-Poets on some Lord's Son's Wedding-day.
Their Visits do save Oyl, and make the door
Turn easie. She (God bless her) 's cloy'd with 'em.
I've wash'd my face in Mercury water, for
A year and upwards; lain in Oyl'd Gloves still;
Worn my Pomatum'd Masks all night; each morning
Rang'd every Hair in its due rank and Posture;
Laid red amongst the white; writ o'r my face,
And set it forth in a most fair Edition;
Worn a thin Tiffeny only o'r my Breasts;
Kept Musk-plums in my Mouth continually;
Yet have not had one bite at all these baits,
But a poor single-sol'd thin meager Footman,
One that I could see through. I think I shall
Be sav'd by my Virginity, whether
I will or no, and lead an Ape in Heav'n.
Here she comes now with one of her Fopperies.

[Elpid. retires.