 | The Bird in a Cage |  |
Actus III.
Scæna I.
Enter Guard.1.
Come Gentlemen, wee must watch still, that none run away
with the Princesse.
2.
He must haue an excellent stomacke, that can breake these
stone walles to come to her.
3.
Beside this moueable wall of flesh which we carry.
2.
One makes toward vs,—tis a Lady.
Enter Morello like a Lady.
Mo.
So, now am I as valiant as Hercules, when he turned
spnister, greate Iupiter, the patron of scapes, assist my petticote,
and at my returne, I will sacrifice my linnen-breeches to thee,—
here be the men, the men of mettle, now Venus I beseech thee,
and they bee men they will let a Lady enter without many questions.
1.
Saue you sweet Lady, your affaires this way?
Mo.
I goe but in to the Princesse.
1.
From whom?
Mo.
From the Dukes Grace.
1.
What may be your Ladiships name?
Mo.
I neuer thought to giue my selfe a name—my name is
Madam—um. My name is something an odde name, but—
I doe not stand vpon't—my name's Thorne.
1.
Indeed Madam Thorne, if his Grace haue sent you to such a
purpose, you must shew something for our discharge.
Mo.
Why hearke you it was but forgotten, of the Duke to
send his signet—but I ha brought some of his Highnesse deputies
wo'mee, I hope that will satisfie.
As he takes out mony discouers Breeches.
2.
By this gold, breeches
3.
No, they are but silke—here will be sport, I haue a hint already.
Say you so? 'Tis very well—but Madam, we are many,
and we would be loth to venture—deale ingeniously sweet
Lady, have you no more gold in your breeches?
Mor.
Not a doyt, as I am vertuous and sinfull.
1.
Passe—but d'ee heare—and you shud not be secret now.
Mor.
As I am a Gentleman.
3.
A Gentleman? do'st heare him? ile put him to't.
Mor.
I have left some Crownes with your fellow.
2.
Tush, that wo'not satisfie me.
Mor.
Indeed, I ha no more mony.
2.
You have commodity, hang this transitory gold—give
me—what's this?
Mor.
Nothing but a wart a'my little finger.
2.
A wart, let me see't.
Pulls off his Glove.
Mor.
'Tis a Diamond, 'twas my Mothers Legacy—or else
2.
Is it your will I should have it?
Mor.
It was my Mothers will I should weare it, her Ghost
will haunt me, and I should give it away.
2.
You know the way backe Lady.
Mor.
You will give me my gold agen.
1.
Not a doyt, as I am vertuous and sinfull, stand with him
for a toy, and know y'ave no warrant from the Duke, 'tis in our
power.
Mor.
D'ee heare Sir, and it were a Diamond of gold you shud have it.
2.
Lady, I kisse your hand.
Mor.
Y'ave kiss'd the Ring of a my finger Ime sure.
2.
Vse your fortune, passe.
Mor.
If I get to the Ladies, some body shall pay for this,
that's my comfort.
3.
Can you wrastle Madam.
Takes him by the shoulder.
Mor.
Ah—wrastle Sir, Ladies doe not use to wrastle.
3.
They are throwne downe with their good wills then,
come you and I will have about, I must hug your little body.
1.
Humor him, and y'are past danger.
Mor.
Wod you ha me teare my clothes?
1.
Ile perswade him.
3.
To tell you true Madam, this fellow is an abhominable
leapes all comes neare him, if your Ladiships modesty can dispence
with a private favour—you understand; for our parts,
we are satisfied otherwise, and our lips are sow'd up, take him
a 'toside, and see how you can mollifie him, hee's a Cocke at the
Game, and will tread you and you were ten Thornes.
Mor.
Mollifie him, doth he use Ladies so, he will molifie me.
2.
And you were his sister, all's one to him, the Divell is not
more hot and Robustious, where he finds opposition to the sport;
therefore the Duke made choyce of him, as suspecting some
Lord might come disguis'd a this fashion, to prevent dishonour
to the Princesse and Ladies—use your owne discretion.
Mor.
What will become of me, if he be such a Wencher he'll
ravish me, and discover all, what a Rascall was I to venture thus,
ile giue thee my Fan to perswade him—helpe, helpe.
3.
Nay then.
He throwes him downe, and discovers his Breeches.
Why how now? Breeches?
1.
This is a man.
2.
Sure 'tis a woman.
Mor.
To tell you true Gentlemen, I am neyther a man nor a
woman, I am an Hermaphrodite.
1.
How? an Hermaphrodite? What would you doe among
the Ladyes then.
2.
An Hermaphrodite.
3.
Let's search him.
Mor.
Ah.
1.
Stay let's be advis'd, if he be such a Monster, our best way
is to carry him to the Duke.
2., 3.
Agreed.
Mor.
I shall be undone—d'yee heare Noble friends 'tis
but a folly to dissemble, I am no such thing, I am no Hermaphrodite,
I am a friend of yours.
All.
Of ours.
2.
Your Name, I beseech you.
Mor.
I did but jest all this while, the Duke himselfe put
me upon't, to see whether I could cozen you, my Name's Morello.
1.
Signior Morello, 'tis not possible.
Mor.
As I am vertuous, I am, I am no Hermaphrodite, no
matter for the Gold or Diamonds tis your owne—ile acquaint
his Grace how carefull I found you, and if he doe not reward you
beside, ile say hee's the poorest Duke in Christendome: Ile tell
him presently.
Noble Signior wee'le waite vpon you to him.
Mo,
No, no, 'tis better for me to goe alone.
1.
Your pardon, you shall tell him how carefull you found vs
wee'le relate to him how cunningly you carried the businesse.
Mo.
Nay d'yee heare Gentlemen.
All.
It must be so Sir, come sweet effeminate Signior.
Exeunt.
Enter Fulvie, Embassador.
Emb.
Y'aue done me a noble office Signior in this
Discouery, where now liues her banished Louer?
Ful.
My kinsman liues in Florence, but 2. dayes since
I receiued letters from him.
Emb.
In Florence too?
Ful.
Sir you may censure me,
But my affection to the iniurd Lord,
And not without respect vnto the Honor,
Of your Master too, hath bin the cause of
My free Language.
Emb.
Trust me Signior
We are all ingag'd to study you a recompence,
But Mantua was iniust to banish him,
For being too much a Seruant.
Ful.
Sir, when Princes resolue to punish.
Emb.
Vertue shalbe Treason
'Twas tyranny,—why now is she thus cag'd?
Ful.
I can coniecture nothing but his jealousie
Which wilbe euer actiue, by that Loue
Wee enterchang'd at Pisa, when wee grew
Together in our studies—I coniure
Your Noblenesse to silence me.
Emb.
You will dishonor me by suspition:—I am charmd.
Enter Perenotto, Dondolo, Grutti.
Per.
My honord Lord.
Emb.
Signior Perenotto.
Ful.
My gentile sparkes.
Do., Gr.
Your seruants.
Ful.
You are all Courtship.
Per.
Is your Lordship for this wonder?
Emb.
What wonder my Lord?
These paire of Gentlemen haue discourst me into
admiration, there's one has vndertaken to goe invisible.
Emb.
Invisible?
Ful.
How?
Don.
With a tricke that he has.
Ful.
Doe you beleeve him, Gentlemen.
Grut.
You shall see't.
Don.
Wee were heretickes in that point, but our vnderstandings
are convinc'd, he did demonstrate.
Grut.
And because you shall know the truth of his
Art, he wilbe inuisible all but his hand, what thinke you of
that? the rarest fellow in Christendome.
Emb.
Nothing visible but his hand.
Don.
As sure as wee haue giuen him a 100. Crownes
in hand.
Emb.
Why is not the Duke presented with this noueltie.
Don.
Hee's trauailing to the Emperour
first, onely as he goes for our sake, he will shew vs a figgary
of his Art.
Here's Rolliardo, hee's somewhat costiue a tother side
wants Faith.
Roll.
Saue you nest of Courtiers, smooth faces, rich
clothes, and sublime complements, make you amorous in
sight of your Ladies. Donzell del Phebo, and Rosicleer
are you there? what pestilent diseases haue you got, that
you weare so much musk and ciuet about you. Oh for a
Priest of Cupid to sacrifice you now, how your breeches
would burne like incense, & your haire disguised in sweet
powder, leaue your bodies in a mist, while your bones
were inwardly consuming with the fire of Dame Venus altar.
Don.
The same humorist still.
Roll.
I heard say, wee shall haue strange apparitions i'th
aire and yet invisible wonders, a hand must appeare as fatall
to some as that hung o're the Capitoll; for there is a
suspition some purses wilbe iugled emptie, and as silent as
the Moone, no bright Sol appearing, nor a peece of pale
fac'd siluer in your silken Hemispheres.
He is an Infidell.
Roll.
Right Jehochanan, right, my precious Iew, wee
are all Infidell that wonot beleeve the Court catechisme—
my Lord Embassador you are welcome from Florence, does
the great Duke pick sallats still, I meane continue his assize,
returne into his Exchequer once in seauen yeares the
wealth of Tuscany. Vespasian was held couetous for ordaining
vesiels to receiue the beneficiall publick vrine, but
'tis Heathenisme among Christians not to hold Dulcis odor
Lucri è re qualibit.
Emb.
Hee's mad.
Roll.
Signior Perenotto, it has puzzled my vnderstanding,
how you can subsist at Court without making vse
of the common sinnes, flattery, and corruption; take heed,
y'are a great man, and 'tis ominous to dye in your bed, a
signe your children are like to inherite but weake braines,
thou maist goe to Heauen, but thy heire had rather thou
shouldest make a journey to Erebus, for the proverbe sake,
happy is that Sonne, whose Father goes to the Divell.—
Why when comes out my Don invisible, may be, hee's
heere already for wee cannot see him, what sayes my squirrill?
thou lookst dull and Phisicall me thinkes, the crownes
will returne agen invisibly, neuer feare it, and how does
my graue Gymnosophist whose ambition is to be registred
an honest Lord, though thou beest buried vpon almes,
carried to Church with foure torches, and haue an inscription
on thy marble worse then the ballad of the Devill and
the Baker, and might be sung to as vilde a tune too.—
Gentlemen, i'le invite you shortly to see my head cut off,
and doe onely entreat, you would not laugh at me when
I am dead, 'twill shew but poorely in you, and I shall reuenge
it with my Ghost walking.
Ful.
Either he is very confident to atchiue his designe
or late growne desperate, he talkes so wildly.
Enter Seruant.
Don.
I wonder, Signior Altomaro forgets vs. Now,
now, yee shall heare, this is his seruant I know he is not
Ser.
He is invisible—this Letter is directed to you.
Gentlemen
, that you may perceive I deale plainely with
you, I am now inuisible; all but my hand, and here it
is, you may with ease read euery line, as I promised vpon
the receipt of your Crownes.—his hand.
Ser.
I Sir, 'tis his owne hand I can assure you.
Omnes.
Ha, ha, ha.
Don.
He does not meane to serue vs so, thou dost but
iest, where is he invisible.
Ser.
Here I thinke, for I cannot see him, nor doe I
know when I shall, or where he wilbe visible agen, vpon
diligent search I found this paper, but my Master is not
to be found.
Ful.
Then he is invisible indeed.
Roll.
All but his hand. Ha, ha.
Grut.
I doe incline to beleeve, that wee are cheated.
Per.
With a tricke that he has. Ha, ha, ha.
Emb.
You were Heretickes in that point, till he did
demonstrate. Ha, ha, ha.
Roll.
I cannot containe my merry spleene. Ha, ha.
Ful.
Come my Lord, lets leaue them now, to be their
owne derision.
Exeunt Embassador, Fulvio.
Enter Guard with Morello.
Don.
Signior Morello, ha, ha, ha. How came he in a
Petticote.
Mor.
Carry me away quickly, they wil laugh me out
of my little wit.
Roll.
No, no, doe not Gentlemen, remember your
selues.
Grut.
Wee wonot then.
Per.
Morello? 'Ile waite vpon him to the Duke my
selfe.
Mor.
What wise man in Jtaly would be in my coate now.
Exit.
Roll.
I was costiue, and an Infidell, you are Christian
coxcombes, and so, while I see what will become of the
mirth, that is gone before, I leaue your wise Signiorships
a little time, to make your selves invisible indeed.
Fare you well.
Exit.
Dond.
Signior Grutti we are gull'd.
Gr.
I alwayes thought he would cheat us, what shall's
doe, to prevent more laughter?
Serv.
I am resolv'd—I shall get no more money by
him, Gentlemen be not head-hung, droope not, 'tis in this
Sconce, to revenge your selves, and it may bee, recover
your Crownes too.
Dond.
How prithee?
Serv.
My Master—
Dond.
Is invisible, we know't too well.
Serv.
What will you give mee, if I discover him to
your eyes agen, nay give him to your possession.
Give him mony.
Dond.
This.
Grut.
And this—oh quickly.
Serv.
Then first know, my Master is not that man you
tooke him for, no Altomaro he, but Bonamisco the decayd
Artist, he that made Properties, and grew poore for want
of Pictures, who for feare of h
is Creditors left his dwelling,
and in this quaint disguise, set up the Trade of cozening
such wise Gentlemen as you are.
Grut.
Dond. Bonamico!
Serv.
The same.
Dond.
Oh that we could reach him againe.
Serv.
Follow me close, and I will bring you within an
hayres bredth of his false Beard immediately.
Grut.
That will be excellent.
Dond.
Nimbly good Mercury, nimbly.
Exeunt.
Enter Eugenia, Fidelia, Mardona, Donella, Catarina, Cassiava.
Fid.
Madam you are too passive, if you bee deiected
what must we, whose hopes and blisses depend upon your
Fortune.
Don.
Oh liberty, liberty; are all the Roman spirits extinct?
Never a Brutus in Nature, to deliver poore Ladies
from this Captivity.
Cass.
Since there is no probability of our enlargement,
let's be merry, and despise our Sufferings, laugh, tell Tales,
Eug.
There are some thoughts that stick upon my
memory, I would faine discharge.
Cat.
Shall we try our Lutes Madam?
Eug.
And voyces if you please.
Don.
Yes you may try, they say Musicke built the wals
of Thebes, it were a greater myracle if you could charme
these to fall, I shall never indure to live an Anchorite thus,
and it were not for the happinesse that I doe sometimes
dreame of a man, I should leape the Battlement. Now
would I give all my jewels for the sight of a paire of Breeches,
though there were nothing in em.
This but feedes our dulnesse, shall we dance Madam
and stirre our selves.
Cass.
I am for that Musicke, we shall grow to the
ground and we use no more activity.
Eug.
With all my heart.
Don.
None a your dull measures, there's no sport but
in your Country Figaries, a nimble dance will heate, and
and make us merry.
They dance, which done, a Bell rings.
Eug.
Harke, the Bell.
Exit Donella, and enters againe with a letter.
Don.
Some newes from the Duke.
A Letter Madam and these iewels.
Eug.
Ha! whence—from Florence?
reades.
This is my fathers practise, ile peruse the Paper.
Exit.
Don.
I have an excellent hint Ladyes of a mirth,
Cannot but please the Princesse.
Fid.
What is't?
Don.
It will require every ones indeavour,
What if we play some pretty Commick Story,
Kat.
A Play?
Cass.
Shall we?
Wee? Doe not distrust your owne performance,
I ha knowne men ha bin insufficient, but women can play
their parts.
Mar.
I like it, t'wilbe new.
Don.
Wee will not present it to the Princesse
But ingage her person in the action,
We shalbe too few else, some pretty Enterlude
To square with our number—d'yee allow it.
All.
Willingly.
Don.
Come 'ile acquaint you with a plot, then instantly:
referre your selues to me for your parts, we can receiue
no disparagement, our spectators cannot jeere vs,
for weele speake but to the people in the hangings, and
they haue as much Iudgment, as some men that are but
Clothes, at most, but walking pictures.
Fide.
I shalbe ont.
Cass.
What part will you giue me, I'le be a King.
Kat.
Thou't play a Tyrant brauely.
Don.
Let me alone, Ile fit you all I warrant you.
Exeunt
Enter Dondolo, and Grutti.
Don.
Now our invisible Marchant is cag'd, wee may
redeeme our opinion and passe agen in the ranke of discrete
Courtiers.
Grut.
I thinke now to most of the beholders, he is invisible
all but his head, for he has but a small grate to look
out at.
Don.
He shall gull no more with his art I warrant him.
Grut.
Nay, he is like to lye by't, for I heare since, all
his Creditors, like so many Crowes haue light vpon him,
and they'le leaue him but a thin Carkasse.
Don.
Let 'em picke out his Eyes, what care wee.
Grut.
He sent me an Epistle to take pitty on him.
Don.
But I hope thou hast more wit then to shew thy
selfe a Christian to such a Rascall as he is.
Grut.
I returned him my Court complement, that I
was sorry I could not serue him: I would doe him any
office that strecth'd not to mine owne prejudice, that
our summes disburst, he might be enlarged.
Don.
Which is impossible.
Enter Bonamico braue.
Prethee let me see his Letter, in what submissiue language
the Rogue does beseech vs,—Most heroique Signiors,
—good—I throw my selfe at the feete of your mercy,
for to your Iustice, I beg I may not be made a Sacrifice—
nay, wee'll make him beg ere wee h'a done.
Grut.
At the grate.
Don.
I confesse I ha' done you wrong—does he so?
it shall not serve the turne—there is no hope I shall euer
satisfie you,—all the better, lye and rot—if I
be known a Prisoner to my Creditors, I am irrecoverably
lost, oh compassionate, a miserable man, who otherwise
must soone forfeite his day light, and dye in a dungeon.
Ha, ha, ha.
Bon.
Saue you noble Signiors.—
Grut.
—Ha.
Don.
Tis he.
Grut.
Did he not dye in prison, and his Ghost haunts
vs, braue!—'Tis not hee.
Bon.
When this eternall substance of my Soule, did
liue inprison'd in my wanton flesh, and so forth? and how
d'yee like Don Andrea Gentlemen; poore snake, but hee
has cast his skin, and recouered a new coate oth' destinyes
spinning. The Bird is flowne againe.
Don.
How the Diuell came he at liberty.
Grut.
And thus Gallant.
Bon.
The slaue does not beg of your Heroicke Signiorship,
a Court compassion, debts must be paid, there is
no danger of the grate as the case goes, nor of forfeiting
his daylight in a dungeon, if I mistake not, my illustrious
paire of widgens, my serene smooth-fac'd Coxcombes,
whose braines are curdled this hot weather: will your
neate worship sell your cloake, ha? or you that superfluous
double hatch'd Rapier, there be sommes in Nature to
lend you, vpon security that I shall like of.
Don.
He jeeres vs.
Would wee durst beate him.
Bon.
You see me now Gentlemen perfectly, what if
I should walke before you without a body, my head hanging
in the aire like a comet.
Enter Rolliardo.
Grut.
Would thou wer't hang'd any way.
Don.
Heere's Rolliardo too.
Let's be gone.
Bon.
Or shall I appoint you a day when I will be invisible
all but my hand?
Don.
No, I thanke you Sir, we haue some businesse at
this present.
Grut.
Let's to the prison, and know
the wonder better—Noble Signior.
Bon.
For your Crownes.
Don.
Wee are glad wee had 'em for you, deare Signior
talke no more on 'em.
Exeunt.
Bon.
Farewell Phantasmas then—ha? 'tis he, Sir.
Roll.
Keepe your way.
Bon.
You doe not know me
But I ha brought a life which by your meanes
Has bin preservd from wretchednesse, your Bounty,
Deserues you should dispose it.
Roll.
What are you.
Bon.
I was the obiect of a charity
Wee seldome meete in Mankind, from a prison
You sent a summe to free me.
Roll.
Prethee friend, if th'ast receiu'd a benefit, goe
home, and say thy prayers:—I would forget it.
Bon.
'Mong many whom your Noblenesse inlarg'd,
I came to make you tender of my service:
Despise not Sir my gratitude.
Roll.
D'yee mocke mee?
Bon.
May my soule want Heauens mercy then: to you,
Next my Creator, I doe owe my this Being
I haue a Soule is full of thankes, but name
Imployment to assure you, and you make me twice happy.
Roll.
I ha nothing to say to you.
Bon.
Then I ha something to say to you.
Roll.
How.
And you shall heare it too, and give me thankes
Y'ave sow'd your Charity in a fruitfull ground,
Which shall returne it tenfold; nay one hundred.
What you have done for me you shall acknowledge
I will deserve toth' height.
Roll.
Th'art liberall in language.
Bo.
Ile be active—off with this sullen face,
It scurvily becomes you, d'yee heare.
I studyed for you, since you payd my debts,
Ile doe you a courtesie and save your life,
Which your attempt upon the Princesse has
Left desperate, a happy fancy Sir,
If Heaven will please to prosper it, and you
Not be your owne enemy to refuse it.
Roll.
Ha, ha, ha, what mean'st?
Bon.
Nay you shall laugh and heartily ere I ha done w'e
The Duke does love his Daughter, sends her all
Rarities are presented to him.
Roll.
His soule's not dearer to him—what of that?
Bon.
Why then you shall be admitted into the Castle
of comfort, that's all; the conceipt is in my braine, and
would you could as probably get her consent, to untye her
Virgin Zone, as I dispose your accesse to her: it shall not
cost you much, if I fayle, instead of saying of my prayers,
Ile curse the Destinies and dye with you.
Roll.
D'yee heare, I ha bestow'd 300. Crownes already
to set your heeles at Liberty, if you doe mocke mee, it
shall cost me 500. but Ile ha'you clapt up agen, where you
shall howle all day at the Grate, for a meale at Night from
the Basket.
Bon.
You are in earnest now?
Roll.
Yes.
Bon.
By all that you have threatned, so am I, have but
the patience to walke and heare me.
Roll.
Can thy Art procure this?
Bon.
My Art? Why looke you, I made this Watch. Ile
bestow it on you.
Roll.
What to doe? to reckon the houres I ha to live.
It sha'not cost me so much trouble as that Toy did
to make you master of your wishes, still if Heaven prosper
it: come let's talke privately, you shall ha the plot.
Among the rest, one may reward them all.
I long to be discoursing it, pray lead the way.
Roll.
Provide agen you mocke me not—come on Sir.
| The Bird in a Cage | |