Rhymes on the rules of the Cheshire bowmen :: :: University of Virginia Library

Rhymes on the rules of the Cheshire bowmen

By R. E. Egerton Warburton

Egerton-Warburton, R. E. (1804-1891)

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RHYMES ON THE RULES.

TARGET RULES.

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RHYMES ON THE RULES.

RULES.
1.—That a Committee consisting of twelve members, three to form a quorum, be appointed at the General Annual Meeting, at the Royal George Inn, Knutsford, [OMITTED]

The right rule would be with Rule one to begin,
How our Sessions are held at the Royal George Inn;
But if ladies should listen, it only would bore 'em,
Were I, with sad want both of tact and decorum,
To lay what concerns our Committee before 'em,
How three men are needed to make up a Quorum!

Rule two, they would simply consider it rude

2.—That members be elected by ballot. [OMITTED] That one black ball in four shall exclude

To be told that one black ball in four can exclude;
I would rather declare
To each Candidate fair,
Be the ball white or black they can never intrude;
On the first and the second then wasting no word,

I proceed with permission at once to the third;

3.—That the Annual Subscription of each member shall be one guinea to be paid in advance on the first day of May; and in addition that every newly elected member pay two guineas upon his entrance, and five shillings for crockery.

Each member is free
For one golden guinea,
But, if newly elected he happen to be,
An additional two for his entrance fee
Will bring, if I'm right, the sum total to three;
Except that compell'd by the rules of our Cocker, he
Must also contribute five shillings for crockery.
Passing o'er the next two, I would earnestly fix

The attention of ladies on Rule number six;

6.—That a Lady where there is no Gentleman resident in the house may be admitted as a member on payment of one guinea per annum, without entrance. [OMITTED]

If they have not a Resident Gentleman, they
One and all will have twenty-one shillings to pay;

So get one—economy prompts the advice,
Get a Resident quickly, and come at half-price;
Advice which this further advantage conveys,
The odd ten-and-sixpence the Resident pays.

Let each Host and each Hostess read next number eight,

8.—That a Grand Target be held once in each year, when each member shall bring Provisions and Wine to a general Luncheon according to his party. [OMITTED]

There the arrows are forks, and the target a plate;
Not only, so far as their circle extends,
Let them count their relations, and number their friends,
But each appetite measure with accurate line,
And accordingly bring both provisions and wine;
For many, unpractis'd as Archers, are seen
To make up at the board for lost time on the green;
As Shooters, unfit to contend in the strife,
As Carvers they skilfully handle the knife;
As the Claret goes round the red circle they hit,
And make their gross score while at table they sit.

Our Club cannot prosper unless we emburse

(it is particularly requested that Members will pay their Subscriptions punctually, by Post Office order or otherwise; and if not paid on or before the first Grand Target day, the Secretary is authorized to send a Circular to each Member in arrear.)

The Treasurer's wallet,—nay, quite the reverse,
From bad we shall only be getting to worse,
For the bowstring is strung by unstringing the purse;
Then remember, I pray, your subscription to pay
Either on or before the first Grand target day;
If not,—as by Rule we are authorised then,
Defaulters we prick with the point of our pen;
That May day is pay day, we beg to remind 'em,
And a Circular print,
As a delicate hint,
That none who come here, leave their money behind 'em;
You by Post Office order, no doubt, are aware
When a Circular comes how to make it all square.