University of Virginia Library


171

Travellers and Tourists.

------I, demens! et sævas curre per Alpes,
Ut pueris placeas & declamatio fias.
Juvenal.

Go, thou insane man! rush o'er the wild Alps, that children may be amused, and yourself become the subject of declamation.


From traveller Mandeville, liar surnam'd,
To moderns at shooting the long-bow far fam'd,

172

On par with romancers we justly may class,
Since stomach's capacity nought can surpass:

173

For on palfrey I've known worthy gentleman ride,
To a soil which, if gain'd, must be o'er Neptune's tide,

174

While the distance some twelve hundred leagues he has banter'd,
Since his palfrey the route hath in eighteen hours canter'd.
But to treat now of travellers staunch in the cause,
A Bruce long discredited claims high applause;

175

Whose bold perseverance at length reap'd requital,
Of public ingratitude—shameful recital!
Thus ultimate pity too late was his doom,
His merits allow'd when he slept in the tomb.
As dauntless in courage and bold in pursuit,
To hardships inur'd, of perception acute;

176

With equal regret must I quote Mungo Parke,
Whose end is obscur'd in fate's mystery dark.
Macartney's great earl with rich presents and suite
To China repair'd, but the dogs, too discreet,

177

Took all:—then discarded us; knowing full well,
If John Bull got an inch he wou'd soon seize an ell.
A Wilson on wonders of Egypt hath written,
Recorder of Boney—and pyramid bitten;
While Porter, not ranking with artists a Ker,
On theme of the North has made wonderful stir;
Who wedded to princess now rules mighty Don,
While no stranger to Russia comes also Sir John,

178

Knight-errant of pocket-book blazon'd afar,
For visiting regions in travelling Carr.
On masterly touches of Moore we now glance,
Depicting correctly Italia and France;
And vamp'd up by scribe, paid for labour, is seen
Research in Crimea of fam'd Margravine;

179

While deck'd with choice plates Lord Valencia comes next,
With ocean of margin and streamlet of text.
Home tours of a Gilpin alike we must note;
Colonel Th—nt—n, long shooter as ever yet wrote,

180

Whose Tours, yclep'd Sporting, re-echo one cry,
'Tis Ego the Colonel—fam'd I myself I;
Renown'd for displaying of valour such dint,
The steel caus'd no fire though oppos'd to a Flint;

181

For reason thus simple, all sports he'll delight in,
Save facing a bullet, and there's no sham-fighting.
But to wind up of tourists poetical samples,
By the Lord, a book-vender affords us examples
Of scenery grand, and exploits in the North,
Which was cook'd in the Poultry, true publisher's broth.
 
Lo! here's another set to pen
Works that entrance the minds of men;
I mean my travellers in legions,
That coin rare tales in foreign regions,
And vie with Pliny when they dash,
That tells ye snake built nest in ash;
Or prate of men who just can see
As well as him of Sicily,
Who we are told by writer sage,
Cou'd from Lilybium see Carthage;
Whose naked optics did not fail
To view each ship from harbour sail.
Others there are that will hatch lies,
And coin long journeys in studies;
Amuse the fools with wond'rous stories,
Of seas, woods, deserts, promontories;
Who ne'er budg'd farther from their houses,
Than lambkin from its ewe that browses.
And of this crew that made great stir,
I needs must quote fam'd Dambergher,
Who wrote concerning Afric's deserts,
And men that never put on clean shirts;
Of things whom you might see as soon
As man discover in the moon;
In short, 'twas marvellous and rare
As he cou'd make it—not being there;
And rais'd a stir which was not sated
Till lie full oft had been translated:
When, lo! the writer by confession
Made known 'gainst truth his sad transgression.
I've still a race of connoisseurs
In travelling—who publish tours,
That have not recourse to earthquakes,
But rest contented with some lakes,
Meand'ring streams, rocks, woods, and glades,
A few old walls, dried up cascades, &c.

For the truth of this assertion, let the reader refer to Pliny, where he will find this miracle avouched; while Cowley, in his poetical Treatise of Plants, inserts these lines:—

But that which gave more wonder than the rest,
Within an ash a serpent built her nest,
And laid her eggs; whence once to come beneath
The very shadow of an ash was—death.

A Sicilian called Strabo is reported to have seen objects at the distance of one hundred and thirty miles, with as much distinctness as if only removed to a few yards distance.

This most ingenious chamber-traveller was native of Germany, and a carpenter, who pretended to have explored the most remote regions of Africa, an account of which appeared in print, and was eagerly translated into French and English; when, lo! the writer's confession shortly after appeared, announcing to the public that the whole was a mere fabrication, the writer never having visited that part of the globe which constituted the narrative in question.

Insitû hominibus libidine alendi de industria rumores. Men having in them a natural desire to propagate reports.

If there existed gudgeons in the present century who swallowed Dambergher's bait, our ancestors, be it remembered, did not prove themselves less credulous; since the fictitious existence and code of laws pictured by Sir Thomas More in the Utopia, were long accredited as in actual being; and the learned Ludovicus Vives, his constant correspondent and friend, in speaking of the empire of China, writes—“That he wonders any man could spend his time about such trifles.”

See Webb's Antiquity of China, 8vo. 1678.

The unfortunate circumstances attending the fate of this persevering adventurer are sufficient to deter any spirited individual from encountering dangers under the hope of ultimately benefiting the human race. What must have been Mr. Bruce's feelings, after the perils he had manfully encountered, to find his narrative turned into ridicule, and himself held forth as the grossest impostor; and this too, by a set of hireling writers in their garrets, who never were five miles removed from the smoke of the metropolis? Unfortunately for Mr. Bruce, he did not survive the shock to hear detailed the researches of the French when in Egypt, which tended in every respect to validate the narrative of this most injured gentleman; since which, indeed, Mr. Bruce's integrity is universally allowed—but reparation comes too late. If we refer to the travels of this personage, the narratives are interesting in the extreme; and in that part of the work which details his passage over the burning sands, nothing can afford more amusement, combined with dread for the safety of the being so completely environed with horrors on every side. Let romancers delineate what they will, no fictitious embellishments can ever surpass these recorded truths of our gallant countryman.

The wonderful perseverance of Mungo Parke, like that of the last-mentioned traveller, is a convincing proof of the astonishing powers of the human mind when bent upon the accomplishment of any particular object; unfortunately for the world, there is too much cause to apprehend that the final discoveries of this most enterprising individual are for ever lost, as several of the latest accounts almost amount to a proof of his having perished by drowning while crossing a rapid stream to escape the murderous purpose of some savage pursuers.

The account of Lord Macartney's Embassy to China is extremely entertaming, and may be relied upon as a most faithful delineation, not only of the occurrences which transpired to his lordship and suite, but all the statements relative to the customs, manners, &c. of that extraordinary nation are detailed with a precision that bespeaks the veracity of every delineation which the work contains.

The account of Egypt by Mr. Wilson affords incontestable proof, that the writer was master of the subject he undertook to delineate. In narratives of this description, nothing is required but perspicuity of style, and the most implicit adherence to truth; in both which instances the writer has completely established his fame.

In addition to his acknowledged talent as an artist ,Mr. Ker Porter has not tarnished his fame by standing forth the literary delineator of Russia; a production rendered the more valuable, as from this gentleman's conjugal alliance it may naturally be inferred, that his opportunities of acquiring an intimate knowledge of every thing appertaining to the manners and customs of the country were greatly facilitated.

Though there is too much egotism in the pages of this gentleman, and his language is not sufficiently studied, yet his works are by no means divested of interest. Sir John, like many other people, has mistaken his talent: it is obviously his wish to be every where playful, and at times witty; whereas if he had been content to appear only the plain narrator of circumstances as they occurred, his volumes would have acquired a more sterling reputation with the lovers of literature.

Dr. Moore's Travels through France and Italy only afford a fresh proof of the sterling abilities possessed by this classical writer.

It is conjectured that the above lady committed notes to her pocket-book during the tour in question, which, upon her return to England, were methodized and put into their present trim by some author, whose leading object was a voyage to the Peruvian mines, rather than a ramble through the Crimea. Lord Valencia's tour is not divested of claims to some share of merit; but, unfortunately for the public, what with the splendid specimen of its typography, richness of the hot-pressed paper, and sumptuous pictorial embellishments, it is rendered so much a lordly book, that a man of middling fortune is not placed in a situation to peruse it.

The works of Mr. Gilpin have been very deservedly extolled by the public, and his picturesque accompaniments bespeak him intimately acquainted with the effect of light and shade in landscape scenery; and, although not recorded by Sir Noodle, I must here award no small portion of praise as justly due to Sir George Mackenzie, together with Messrs. Pinkerton, Gold, and Wakefield, who have ably laboured in their several literary vocations as descriptive and entertaining travellers.

This ci-devant Colonel of the West York Militia, who has for half a century back usurped the title of England's sportsman general, has given to the world a brace of Sporting Tours, containing feats of that description, which any personage may accredit whose powers in believing the marvellous are more capacious than the writer's. Our author, anxious at all times to place things to the best account, has not only kept his mistresses for domestic purposes, but transformed one into a jockey upon the race-course at York. His early friend and fellow-traveller through Scotland was the late Tom Mosley, who never acknowledged an acquaintance below the rank of His Grace my Lord Duke; in short, the colonel's associates have been of every rank and class in society, from the man of title down to the stable-boy: he has quarrelled with a branch of the blood royal, and entered into law-suits with artists, authors, and conveyancers; he has been horsewhipped on a public stand; in fine, he has performed such feats as justly entitle him to the appellation of the hic etubique colonel; and, as a finish to the portraiture, let it be remembered, that his wealth was never placed to any account whatsoever but the selfish gratification of his own inordinate pleasures.

Among booksellers and publishers, Mr. Mawman does not rank the only scribe; witness Sir Richard Phillips, whose publication, entitled The Office of Sheriff, is by no means divested of useful information. The late Mr. Gardiner, of Pall Mall, was also a dabbler with the press. Neither let Mr. Tegg, of the Apollo Library, Cheapside, be omitted, to whom we are indebted for the biographical sketch of Dr. Hugh Blair, inserted in Phillips's Public Characters.