 | Close of play |  |
1
[If hours in nets and hours in games]
If hours in nets and hours in gamesare added truthfully together,
i must have run twelve thousand miles
in loyalty to solid leather.
loaning his legs some forty years
to cricket till their worth is ended
should help a man to worry less
about the job that can't be mended.
2
OUT OF SEASON
April's here, and frankly warming
Lambs along their little spines.
Primrose families are swarming
Where, above anemones,
Many aldermanic bees
Drone in search of honey-mines.
April's fair for maids that seek
Southern violets near a thicket.
Blest are they! But what of lads
That hunger for a pair of pads
And other implements of Cricket?
Lambs along their little spines.
Primrose families are swarming
Where, above anemones,
Many aldermanic bees
Drone in search of honey-mines.
April's fair for maids that seek
Southern violets near a thicket.
Blest are they! But what of lads
That hunger for a pair of pads
And other implements of Cricket?
Cuckoo's here, and loudly stating
Lesser folk should build at speed,
Since his wife is ruminating
Where to lodge, in briar or quick,
First the egg, and then the chick
Servantbirds will have to feed.
April's fair for celandines
Squandering gold in Surrey ditches.
Blest are they! But how can that
Be first-class pleasure to the Bat
Deprived so very long of pitches?
Lesser folk should build at speed,
Since his wife is ruminating
Where to lodge, in briar or quick,
First the egg, and then the chick
Servantbirds will have to feed.
April's fair for celandines
Squandering gold in Surrey ditches.
Blest are they! But how can that
Be first-class pleasure to the Bat
Deprived so very long of pitches?
3
Game of Glory! come to kindle
Lad in hut and lad in hall
Now that apprehensions dwindle,
Now that doting lovers quit
Carpet crease and Centuries hit
Dreamwise from a ghostly ball.
April's fair with loveliness
Lent to man by almond branches.
Blest is man! But what of those
Big Yorkers that, from friendly foes,
Come down in May like avalanches?
Lad in hut and lad in hall
Now that apprehensions dwindle,
Now that doting lovers quit
Carpet crease and Centuries hit
Dreamwise from a ghostly ball.
April's fair with loveliness
Lent to man by almond branches.
Blest is man! But what of those
Big Yorkers that, from friendly foes,
Come down in May like avalanches?
4
THE MASTER
Overhead a sky of speedwell,
Pampered yards of green below;
Girls to flutter each Brightonian
Substitute for Romeo;
Tents with beer for barleycorners
Husky at the luncheon hour;
All of these are proof that Cricket's
Bursting fiercely into flower.
Pampered yards of green below;
Girls to flutter each Brightonian
Substitute for Romeo;
Tents with beer for barleycorners
Husky at the luncheon hour;
All of these are proof that Cricket's
Bursting fiercely into flower.
Hove is where I breathe contented
Now that lilac in array
Publishes the white and purple
Masterpieces due to May.
Here I puff a cloud and wonder
What decrees of darkling Fate
Govern heroes soon to tackle
Every subterfuge of Tate.
Now that lilac in array
Publishes the white and purple
Masterpieces due to May.
Here I puff a cloud and wonder
What decrees of darkling Fate
Govern heroes soon to tackle
Every subterfuge of Tate.
Sinfield neck-and-crop to Langridge,
Nothing but a leg-bye scored!
Enters now the dreaded Hammond,
Gloucester County's overlord.
Deeper, Cover Point! and deeper,
You that guard the boundaries there!
When she comes you won't have even
Half a tick of time to spare!
Nothing but a leg-bye scored!
Enters now the dreaded Hammond,
Gloucester County's overlord.
Deeper, Cover Point! and deeper,
You that guard the boundaries there!
When she comes you won't have even
Half a tick of time to spare!
5
Thud! She's made a fat civilian
Scuttle to preserve the bone
Threatened by a bomb of leather
Wensley could but leave alone.
Thud! She's squandered twenty schoolboys
Rolling in a general laugh.
How the antic figures caper
Furious on the Telegraph!
Scuttle to preserve the bone
Threatened by a bomb of leather
Wensley could but leave alone.
Thud! She's squandered twenty schoolboys
Rolling in a general laugh.
How the antic figures caper
Furious on the Telegraph!
This is almost youth recovered!
Keen I quiver in my chair,
Even sensing those electric
Crackles common to the hair.
This is England for the English,
Now that Hammond, come in May,
Drives his flock of Fours, presenting
Ringside hearts with holiday!
Keen I quiver in my chair,
Even sensing those electric
Crackles common to the hair.
This is England for the English,
Now that Hammond, come in May,
Drives his flock of Fours, presenting
Ringside hearts with holiday!
6
A VETERAN
Had Fate
In handsome mood permitted me to bowl
As well as Maurice Tate,
I should have felt remarkably elate.
In handsome mood permitted me to bowl
As well as Maurice Tate,
I should have felt remarkably elate.
That verve!
Where green is overhung by cornflower blue
His courage, muscle, nerve
Supply the double gift of Length and Swerve.
Where green is overhung by cornflower blue
His courage, muscle, nerve
Supply the double gift of Length and Swerve.
I sit
Glad-hearted on a bench and note
How Sussex vim and grit
Make red-rose Lancaster decline to hit.
Glad-hearted on a bench and note
How Sussex vim and grit
Make red-rose Lancaster decline to hit.
To-day
Is watching weather of the golden sort,
And I propose to stay
As long as lads are authorized to play.
Is watching weather of the golden sort,
And I propose to stay
As long as lads are authorized to play.
Should damp
Arrive to-morrow from the deuce knows where,
My set of bones will tramp
Pavilionward with Hope beneath a gamp.
Arrive to-morrow from the deuce knows where,
My set of bones will tramp
Pavilionward with Hope beneath a gamp.
7
For bowls,
And what appears to be a crafty plan,
With eighteen little holes,
For goading men to jeopardize their souls,
And what appears to be a crafty plan,
With eighteen little holes,
For goading men to jeopardize their souls,
I care
With fully ten times less the warmth I feel
If cricket-driven where
The use of turf is use beyond compare.
With fully ten times less the warmth I feel
If cricket-driven where
The use of turf is use beyond compare.
Had Fate
In frank goodhumour settled long ago
To bracket me with Tate,
I should have felt astoundingly elate!
In frank goodhumour settled long ago
To bracket me with Tate,
I should have felt astoundingly elate!
8
FINE FEVER
His look is like the look of one
Demented by superfluous sun
At mischief in the brain.
What frets him is a tricky ode
For issue in The Starlit Road
About the crime of Cain.
Demented by superfluous sun
At mischief in the brain.
What frets him is a tricky ode
For issue in The Starlit Road
About the crime of Cain.
Do what he will, some fancies rove
Toward the weathered bench at Hove
Where yesterday he sat;
And boyhood bubbles up in play
To fizz till he can slip away
To watch his County bat.
Toward the weathered bench at Hove
Where yesterday he sat;
And boyhood bubbles up in play
To fizz till he can slip away
To watch his County bat.
I know how fast the pen will tear
Along his lines, as if a hare
Were sprinting on the sheet,
With dogs, ferociously inclined,
Not nearly far enough behind
That locomotive meat.
Along his lines, as if a hare
Were sprinting on the sheet,
With dogs, ferociously inclined,
Not nearly far enough behind
That locomotive meat.
The rumpled fashion of the mop
Of foliage on his clever top
Denotes a bothered bard.
To tackle for a lengthy time
With stanzas any sort of crime
Is labour; and it's hard.
Of foliage on his clever top
Denotes a bothered bard.
To tackle for a lengthy time
With stanzas any sort of crime
Is labour; and it's hard.
9
But comma, semi-colon, dash,
With other signs producing cash
From journalistic Jove,
No longer persecute a head
Deprived of cricket. Work is dead,
And Hove is doubly Hove!
With other signs producing cash
From journalistic Jove,
No longer persecute a head
Deprived of cricket. Work is dead,
And Hove is doubly Hove!
10
TWO
Daffodils in plenty,
Glorious in a jug,
Set me scoring twenty
Boundaries on the rug.
Piccadilly trumpets,
Some of sovereign hue,
Some as pale as crumpets,
Seem to publish you,
Cricket!—the Upholder
Lads rejoice to love,
Loosing arm and shoulder,
Buttoning a glove.
Glorious in a jug,
Set me scoring twenty
Boundaries on the rug.
Piccadilly trumpets,
Some of sovereign hue,
Some as pale as crumpets,
Seem to publish you,
Cricket!—the Upholder
Lads rejoice to love,
Loosing arm and shoulder,
Buttoning a glove.
Though the Age of Reason
Dawdles on the way,
Since the Cricket Season
Cannot come till May,
Golf, the ever ready,
Over league and league
Fascinates the heady
Scorner of fatigue.
Day by day assemble
Near a tiny pit
Harlequins who tremble
When they dare the hit.
Do not think I blame them
Loosely for the sins
Causing me to name them
Here as harlequins.
Even rosy Flappers
Deprecate the use
Made of various wrappers,
Crocus, violet, puce.
Super-roomy knickers—
Probably Plus Eights—
Move to sudden snickers
Joans and Sues and Kates.
Why, in tints surpassing
Rainbow's colour-plan,
Scorch the fairway, glassing
Woman in the man?
Dawdles on the way,
Since the Cricket Season
Cannot come till May,
Golf, the ever ready,
Over league and league
Fascinates the heady
Scorner of fatigue.
Day by day assemble
Near a tiny pit
Harlequins who tremble
When they dare the hit.
11
Loosely for the sins
Causing me to name them
Here as harlequins.
Even rosy Flappers
Deprecate the use
Made of various wrappers,
Crocus, violet, puce.
Super-roomy knickers—
Probably Plus Eights—
Move to sudden snickers
Joans and Sues and Kates.
Why, in tints surpassing
Rainbow's colour-plan,
Scorch the fairway, glassing
Woman in the man?
Cricket seldom offers
Yards of over-bright
Pabulum to scoffers
Wincing at the sight.
Though at times a gazer
Jibs at what he sees
Flaunted by a blazer
Fit for chimpanzees,
Less of feminizing
Marks the Golden Game
Year by year devising
Supplements for Fame.
Cricket's round the corner,
April wellnigh dumb.
Many a supple Horner
Longs to pick the plum
Coveted by wristy
Batsmen, quick of pose,
Dealing with the twisty
Venom of their foes.
Century plum!—the Beauty
Swelling in our sight;
Century plum!—the fruity
British-born delight.
Yards of over-bright
Pabulum to scoffers
Wincing at the sight.
Though at times a gazer
Jibs at what he sees
Flaunted by a blazer
Fit for chimpanzees,
Less of feminizing
Marks the Golden Game
Year by year devising
Supplements for Fame.
12
April wellnigh dumb.
Many a supple Horner
Longs to pick the plum
Coveted by wristy
Batsmen, quick of pose,
Dealing with the twisty
Venom of their foes.
Century plum!—the Beauty
Swelling in our sight;
Century plum!—the fruity
British-born delight.
Welcomers of creases,
Proud to be alive,
Shed your winter fleeces,
Rush toward the Drive!
When at last the roller
Yields to sinewy play,
When at last the bowler
Proves that May is May,
Nobly flaunt the fashion
Hidden for half a year
While the winter's passion
Kept us runless here.
Look! The Circle, rounded,
Clad in crimson, comes
Ready to be pounded.
Pound it till it hums!
Proud to be alive,
Shed your winter fleeces,
Rush toward the Drive!
When at last the roller
Yields to sinewy play,
When at last the bowler
Proves that May is May,
Nobly flaunt the fashion
Hidden for half a year
While the winter's passion
Kept us runless here.
Look! The Circle, rounded,
Clad in crimson, comes
Ready to be pounded.
Pound it till it hums!
13
WHO?
Out of the cool pavilion comes,
His face a trifle Flemish,
At twelve o'clock by Benjamin,
A Bat without a blemish.
For tingling lads and greying dads
And girls as keen as mustard
He's England in a pair of pads,
Dark, competent, unflustered.
His face a trifle Flemish,
At twelve o'clock by Benjamin,
A Bat without a blemish.
For tingling lads and greying dads
And girls as keen as mustard
He's England in a pair of pads,
Dark, competent, unflustered.
Into the cool pavilion comes
While four o'clock is chiming,
Amid a gale of London cheers,
This overlord of timing.
Beside his name upon the frame
That telegraphs the story
Two never-beaten hundreds flame
As stars for Madam Glory!
While four o'clock is chiming,
Amid a gale of London cheers,
This overlord of timing.
Beside his name upon the frame
That telegraphs the story
Two never-beaten hundreds flame
As stars for Madam Glory!
14
TESTWARD
All hail the Sixteen Names! We clearly see
That each selected man is fit to be
Where what are known to us as Bumper Gates
Let vivid banter voice in broad-flung States
Colonial ringside Doric, barbed to show
That slang is quick when figuring is slow
Upon the Telegraph. What thousands roar
At Rip Van Winkle and his sleepy score!
That each selected man is fit to be
Where what are known to us as Bumper Gates
Let vivid banter voice in broad-flung States
Colonial ringside Doric, barbed to show
That slang is quick when figuring is slow
Upon the Telegraph. What thousands roar
At Rip Van Winkle and his sleepy score!
We honour all the names, the one not least
Of him whose homes are England and the East.
But all are noble in this noble quest
Of what was torn from England by the best
Australian type of grit. Below, on deck,
Each Argonaut will shuffle ways to wreck
Bradmanian skill, and every dreaming head
Will catch or bowl or run him out in bed.
Of him whose homes are England and the East.
But all are noble in this noble quest
Of what was torn from England by the best
Australian type of grit. Below, on deck,
Each Argonaut will shuffle ways to wreck
Bradmanian skill, and every dreaming head
Will catch or bowl or run him out in bed.
15
But what of Captaincy? Our Leader's brain
And smouldering fire are signals of a strain
In rigid keeping with the sport that hurled
A hardened ball of leather round the world.
In crisis, come what will, he never serves
The Golden Game with aught but iron nerves,
And never falters when prevailing odds
Are such as seem the malice of the gods.
And smouldering fire are signals of a strain
In rigid keeping with the sport that hurled
A hardened ball of leather round the world.
In crisis, come what will, he never serves
The Golden Game with aught but iron nerves,
And never falters when prevailing odds
Are such as seem the malice of the gods.
All hail the Sixteen Names! We think them those
Of likely lads to force down-under foes
To bear the second place, yet cheer the band
Returning laurelled to the Motherland.
'Twas bellying canvas lifted to the foam
That curls along the ceiling of his home
Imperial Neptune; but a steamer might,
With Ashes, bring the salty God in sight!
Of likely lads to force down-under foes
To bear the second place, yet cheer the band
Returning laurelled to the Motherland.
'Twas bellying canvas lifted to the foam
That curls along the ceiling of his home
Imperial Neptune; but a steamer might,
With Ashes, bring the salty God in sight!
(1932)
16
DOWN AND UP
“This 'ere is wot I'd do,” said he,
“If I was you an' you was me,
I'd grin, an' rummidge in my fob
Or trousis pocket for a bob,
An' frank a down-an'-outer through
The turnstile, Guvnor, same as you,
To blow a cloud an' take a squint
At Robins on the sprint.”
“If I was you an' you was me,
I'd grin, an' rummidge in my fob
Or trousis pocket for a bob,
An' frank a down-an'-outer through
The turnstile, Guvnor, same as you,
To blow a cloud an' take a squint
At Robins on the sprint.”
“Upon my word, I feel you would,
Without a murmur, if you could.
There's cricket in your face, or so
A stranger thinks who ought to know.
As silver's lazy in my fob,
Suppose a florin gets the job
Of buying what you call a squint
Of Robins on the sprint!”
Without a murmur, if you could.
There's cricket in your face, or so
A stranger thinks who ought to know.
As silver's lazy in my fob,
Suppose a florin gets the job
Of buying what you call a squint
Of Robins on the sprint!”
17
A REBUKE
Let be! Let be!
Our Cricket Team is chosen
For the Testing oversea.
Why call Selectors donkey-men
Because you miss a name or two?
In other words, old Grumbler,
Let me recommend to you
Less vinegared a view.
Our Cricket Team is chosen
For the Testing oversea.
Why call Selectors donkey-men
Because you miss a name or two?
In other words, old Grumbler,
Let me recommend to you
Less vinegared a view.
Let be! Let be!
The men have proved their fitness
To the sovereign M.C.C.
I question if the Motherland
Has finer all-round worth to send.
In any case, Old Grumbler,
It is sporting to defend
The Team you cannot mend.
The men have proved their fitness
To the sovereign M.C.C.
I question if the Motherland
Has finer all-round worth to send.
In any case, Old Grumbler,
It is sporting to defend
The Team you cannot mend.
Agree! Agree
To join me in a gamble
For a little L.S.D.!
A paper pound against a pound
In paper that our heroes bring
The Ashes back, Old Grumbler,
From the fifth and final Ring
To England in the Spring!
To join me in a gamble
For a little L.S.D.!
A paper pound against a pound
In paper that our heroes bring
The Ashes back, Old Grumbler,
From the fifth and final Ring
To England in the Spring!
18
MISS VENUS
Between the day for starting
On our Cricket Season here
And mid-September's parting
From the best of all the year
A sugared hussy, little,
And as wayward as a dream,
Began to prove how brittle
Was the Tranton Valley team.
On our Cricket Season here
And mid-September's parting
From the best of all the year
A sugared hussy, little,
And as wayward as a dream,
Began to prove how brittle
Was the Tranton Valley team.
If ever Venus fashioned
For the bringing of defeats
A Beauty over-rationed
In regard to fatal sweets,
This girl, intent on spooning
Wheresoever she might be,
Provocative of mooning,
Most undoubtedly was she.
For the bringing of defeats
A Beauty over-rationed
In regard to fatal sweets,
This girl, intent on spooning
Wheresoever she might be,
Provocative of mooning,
Most undoubtedly was she.
The rot began when Merton,
Who was Captain of the side,
Because the maid from Girton
Seemed the shadow of a bride,
At lunch, with bleak insistence,
Thrust away his half-and-half
And glared upon the distance
Like a puzzled orphan calf.
Who was Captain of the side,
Because the maid from Girton
Seemed the shadow of a bride,
At lunch, with bleak insistence,
Thrust away his half-and-half
And glared upon the distance
Like a puzzled orphan calf.
19
He won her pledge. She jilted
With an air of unconcern
Our Captain. How he wilted
When his brother took a turn!
This blast of variation
Was destructive too of Ned.
In short, the ruination
Whirled along from A to Z.
With an air of unconcern
Our Captain. How he wilted
When his brother took a turn!
This blast of variation
Was destructive too of Ned.
In short, the ruination
Whirled along from A to Z.
Full fifty years will wither
Into nothingness before
Our memories cease to dither
In the cold of what we bore
When Tranton Valley, duffered
By the singeing of that Flame,
Throughout the season suffered,
Twice a week, repulsive shame!
Into nothingness before
Our memories cease to dither
In the cold of what we bore
When Tranton Valley, duffered
By the singeing of that Flame,
Throughout the season suffered,
Twice a week, repulsive shame!
20
TENTH
His trousers, they were gloomy, his shirt was old and coarse,
His braces gleamed as yellow as a head of flowering gorse.
His walk toward the wicket showed an agricultural lurch
Seen commonly in cornfields, and less commonly in church.
Arriving tenth, in such a rig, he seemed the sort of loot
Ungenerous Chance assigns to those that need a Substitute.
Well,
You never can tell.
His braces gleamed as yellow as a head of flowering gorse.
His walk toward the wicket showed an agricultural lurch
Seen commonly in cornfields, and less commonly in church.
Arriving tenth, in such a rig, he seemed the sort of loot
Ungenerous Chance assigns to those that need a Substitute.
Well,
You never can tell.
Refusing all directions that an umpire loves to name,
He thrust his forelock backward and at last disposed his frame
So bumpkinly that each of us, too confident of luck,
Believed his contribution could be nothing but a Duck;
For such a garb and such a pose seemed likely to forbid
The whole of what, in point of fact, this Boanerges did.
Well,
You never can tell.
He thrust his forelock backward and at last disposed his frame
So bumpkinly that each of us, too confident of luck,
Believed his contribution could be nothing but a Duck;
For such a garb and such a pose seemed likely to forbid
The whole of what, in point of fact, this Boanerges did.
Well,
You never can tell.
21
Maliciously it happened, by a cunning freak of Fate,
That Captain Thomas Sillery—he thinks himself a Tate—
Was destined to deliver what he hoped would be the ball
Adroit enough to bring about the beefy stranger's fall.
The circle flew. Its resting-place was difficult to fix,
But what the umpire's signal meant undoubtedly was SIX.
Well,
You never can tell.
That Captain Thomas Sillery—he thinks himself a Tate—
Was destined to deliver what he hoped would be the ball
Adroit enough to bring about the beefy stranger's fall.
The circle flew. Its resting-place was difficult to fix,
But what the umpire's signal meant undoubtedly was SIX.
Well,
You never can tell.
The Substitute, without a grin of satisfaction, hitched
His waistband higher, regardless of the leather he had ditched,
But Thomas, greatly rattled, stood and gnawed upon his thumb
While waiting for the cheers to stop, the pounded ball to come.
Anew he galloped twenty yards, and, smarting from the stain,
He slung her down, a thunderbolt! She cost him SIX again.
Well,
You never can tell.
His waistband higher, regardless of the leather he had ditched,
But Thomas, greatly rattled, stood and gnawed upon his thumb
While waiting for the cheers to stop, the pounded ball to come.
Anew he galloped twenty yards, and, smarting from the stain,
He slung her down, a thunderbolt! She cost him SIX again.
Well,
You never can tell.
22
What followed was a pestilence of horrifying slogs.
The fielders ran like prairie fires and puffed like winded dogs.
Our Captain, red as beetroot first, and then, as paper, white
So bogged himself in panic that the Cup went out of sight!
For not till eighty-seven runs, the crop of many a clout,
Had overworked the Telegraph was Gloomy Trousers out.
Well,
You never can tell.
The fielders ran like prairie fires and puffed like winded dogs.
Our Captain, red as beetroot first, and then, as paper, white
So bogged himself in panic that the Cup went out of sight!
For not till eighty-seven runs, the crop of many a clout,
Had overworked the Telegraph was Gloomy Trousers out.
Well,
You never can tell.
23
SHE
Think of her value! She's a ball,
Not very large, not very small.
Not very large, not very small.
Year in, year out, she does for Peace
Far more than millions of police;
Far more than all the vexing herds
Of politicians drunk with words;
Far more than Missions sent to bless
The heathen soul with Godliness;
Far more than all the cheaper mass
Of never-ending Conference gas;
Far more than what is but a League,
Its backbone sagging in fatigue,
Less able than a farmyard cat
To nip—and crunch—a poisonous rat.
Far more than millions of police;
Far more than all the vexing herds
Of politicians drunk with words;
Far more than Missions sent to bless
The heathen soul with Godliness;
Far more than all the cheaper mass
Of never-ending Conference gas;
Far more than what is but a League,
Its backbone sagging in fatigue,
Less able than a farmyard cat
To nip—and crunch—a poisonous rat.
Give her a handclasp! She's the ball,
Not very big, not very small,
That signalizes every day,
At Home, or half the world away,
Fond England's Masterpiece of Play.
Not very big, not very small,
That signalizes every day,
At Home, or half the world away,
Fond England's Masterpiece of Play.
24
SAFETY FIRST
Let London wait! Your round of bread
Need never be more thickly spread
With butter's leading line.
Give gold a miss! At Hove to-day
The cracks of Kent and Sussex play
The game that's trebly fine.
Need never be more thickly spread
With butter's leading line.
Give gold a miss! At Hove to-day
The cracks of Kent and Sussex play
The game that's trebly fine.
Confound the cash! Your eyes disclose
The daily nearness of your nose
To documents in Town.
Give greed a rest! To-day at Hove
Decline to be a City Jove
At odds with fret and frown.
The daily nearness of your nose
To documents in Town.
Give greed a rest! To-day at Hove
Decline to be a City Jove
At odds with fret and frown.
Your bagging cheeks, your dulling lips,
Are danger-signals of eclipse
To gloom a bilious fate.
Financial sceptre? Toss it by,
And underneath a wealthy sky
Neglect the glittering bait!
Are danger-signals of eclipse
To gloom a bilious fate.
Financial sceptre? Toss it by,
And underneath a wealthy sky
Neglect the glittering bait!
How often, very long ago,
When runaways from Cicero,
We knew athletic peace!
A shilling was our talisman
For demi-gods. With them we ran
In thought from crease to crease.
When runaways from Cicero,
We knew athletic peace!
A shilling was our talisman
For demi-gods. With them we ran
In thought from crease to crease.
25
Stiff-jointed, colourless as paste,
You sit in Town and run to waist,
A man unmanned by gold.
With boyhood stirring in the mind,
Let Cricket help your heart to find
The lad you were of old.
You sit in Town and run to waist,
A man unmanned by gold.
With boyhood stirring in the mind,
Let Cricket help your heart to find
The lad you were of old.
Pavilionward! Why slave to greet
The stethoscope of Harley Street?
Be dead to office rule,
And, rolling roycily along
The tarmac, hum that clinking song
You learnt at Harrow School!
The stethoscope of Harley Street?
Be dead to office rule,
And, rolling roycily along
The tarmac, hum that clinking song
You learnt at Harrow School!
26
THERE AND BACK
From seven to twelve I had a rage
For staring at the printed page.
For staring at the printed page.
With mental legs how fast I ran
To be an English Mohican
Along the trail of Do and Dare,
A barnyard feather in my hair!
To be an English Mohican
Along the trail of Do and Dare,
A barnyard feather in my hair!
Nancy and Oliver were friends
For whom I treasured candle-ends,
And, kneeling by the bed at night,
Went red with love and pale with fright.
For whom I treasured candle-ends,
And, kneeling by the bed at night,
Went red with love and pale with fright.
My Mother, fondness in her eyes,
Was glad to feed me with surprise
And brace me when I fell among
Such words as daunted lip and tongue.
Was glad to feed me with surprise
And brace me when I fell among
Such words as daunted lip and tongue.
Then suddenly I burst away
From healthy print to healthier play.
No more at Coilantogle Ford
I stood and kept me with my sword.
From healthy print to healthier play.
No more at Coilantogle Ford
I stood and kept me with my sword.
I seemed to hear a voice cry, “Look!
The Bat is mightier than the Book.
Be Uncas, Hereward, Rob Roy,
Horatius after Cricket, Boy!”
The Bat is mightier than the Book.
Be Uncas, Hereward, Rob Roy,
Horatius after Cricket, Boy!”
27
Imagine me the supple serf
Of two-and-twenty yards of turf
For season after season, till
Age led me quietly downhill!
Of two-and-twenty yards of turf
For season after season, till
Age led me quietly downhill!
I did not join, as some do then,
The cranky League of Withered Men
That sit and add to bygone scores
Unwarrantable Threes and Fours,
The cranky League of Withered Men
That sit and add to bygone scores
Unwarrantable Threes and Fours,
But, pithless, I renewed my rage
For staring at the printed page.
For staring at the printed page.
28
“SEPPY”
I cannot say
That I would frequently consent to play
With Septimus Dundreary on my side.
He loves to lag;
He seems affected by a general sag
Of blazer, trousers, collar, waist-line, bag.
That I would frequently consent to play
With Septimus Dundreary on my side.
He loves to lag;
He seems affected by a general sag
Of blazer, trousers, collar, waist-line, bag.
His ready purse
Prevents official tongues from being terse
When Seppy blinks and potters in the field.
What runs we lose
At times because those duffing hands refuse
The service delegated to his shoes!
Prevents official tongues from being terse
When Seppy blinks and potters in the field.
What runs we lose
At times because those duffing hands refuse
The service delegated to his shoes!
In vain I hint
That even his rotundity would sprint
A little better for a touch of pride.
Well-pleased to hug
Incompetence, he answers with a shrug,
And goes on functioning as a human slug.
That even his rotundity would sprint
A little better for a touch of pride.
Well-pleased to hug
Incompetence, he answers with a shrug,
And goes on functioning as a human slug.
His single bound
Is when the caterer's bell begins to sound
A notice that the various pies are due.
Then, quaffing malt,
He liquidates a shallow sense of fault,
And ends by feeling worth his Cricket salt!
Is when the caterer's bell begins to sound
A notice that the various pies are due.
Then, quaffing malt,
He liquidates a shallow sense of fault,
And ends by feeling worth his Cricket salt!
29
BAFFLED
When lunch was over, John and Jake, being truly startled men,
Linked arms, to hold each other up while walking round the field,
And spoke in undertones of what had happened in the tent
To mystify the pair of them. No wonder that they reeled!
“The fellow's not a mortal; he's a blinking demi-god,”
Said John in consternation. “You can bet your income, Jake,
The like of this has not been known since oily Aaron's rod
Completely flummoxed Pharaoh by its appetite for snake.”
Linked arms, to hold each other up while walking round the field,
And spoke in undertones of what had happened in the tent
To mystify the pair of them. No wonder that they reeled!
“The fellow's not a mortal; he's a blinking demi-god,”
Said John in consternation. “You can bet your income, Jake,
The like of this has not been known since oily Aaron's rod
Completely flummoxed Pharaoh by its appetite for snake.”
“My single satisfaction is the thought that if I bat,
And chance to send the ball to him, I'm bound to score a run;
For miracles are out of date, and if he quickly stoops
To gather and return her, then a miracle is done.
It's not alone his flourishes with salad, pastry, cheese,
And nearly half a cottage loaf that made me gasp and stare.
Good Lord! he wolfed three helpings of a steak-and-kidney pie
And fifteen new potatoes, for I counted them with care.”
And chance to send the ball to him, I'm bound to score a run;
For miracles are out of date, and if he quickly stoops
To gather and return her, then a miracle is done.
It's not alone his flourishes with salad, pastry, cheese,
30
Good Lord! he wolfed three helpings of a steak-and-kidney pie
And fifteen new potatoes, for I counted them with care.”
Jake wobbled on the turfing for a moment. Then he said,
“Perhaps he snored in bed too long and had to take the road
Without his fill of sausages. That trouble would explain
Your demi-god's ability to bite an over-load.
We found at School that Hercules, when nasty jobs were done,
Was such a trencherman as shook beholders to the core;
But even he could scarcely hope, if cricketing to-day,
To equal anywhere on turf this hefty luncheon score.”
“Perhaps he snored in bed too long and had to take the road
Without his fill of sausages. That trouble would explain
Your demi-god's ability to bite an over-load.
We found at School that Hercules, when nasty jobs were done,
Was such a trencherman as shook beholders to the core;
But even he could scarcely hope, if cricketing to-day,
To equal anywhere on turf this hefty luncheon score.”
Imagine how we stood about with pipes and cigarettes
Beneath a sky of Oxford blue to note our famous pair!
Imagine how we chuckled when the demi-god sent down
Three wides, then stamped a savage foot and tugged a hank of hair!
Amusedly we saw him rush to sling along the next,
Believing we were hand in glove, because of food, with Luck.
The next arrived. The next returned, as if a red grenade
To blow the trundler off the field. He grabbed her, and she stuck!
Beneath a sky of Oxford blue to note our famous pair!
31
Three wides, then stamped a savage foot and tugged a hank of hair!
Amusedly we saw him rush to sling along the next,
Believing we were hand in glove, because of food, with Luck.
The next arrived. The next returned, as if a red grenade
To blow the trundler off the field. He grabbed her, and she stuck!
How tragic was the sequel! I defy an acrobat
To utilize on any stage his arms and legs and hips
So well as he that blunted there a Century of jokes
By fury at the bowling crease and sinew in the Slips.
When John, a dismal victim of the only ball he had,
Returned to us, he whispered, as he crumbled in a chair,
The blighter wolfed three helpings of a steak-and-kidney pie
And fifteen new potatoes, for I counted them with care.
To utilize on any stage his arms and legs and hips
So well as he that blunted there a Century of jokes
By fury at the bowling crease and sinew in the Slips.
When John, a dismal victim of the only ball he had,
Returned to us, he whispered, as he crumbled in a chair,
The blighter wolfed three helpings of a steak-and-kidney pie
And fifteen new potatoes, for I counted them with care.
32
BIG BROTHER
Don't apologize for turning
From the Latin you are learning
To the Oval! Go on burning
To become a Surrey Bat!
Kept in funds by being single,
I'm prepared with yours to mingle
Cash to subsidize the tingle
You demand. So that is that.
From the Latin you are learning
To the Oval! Go on burning
To become a Surrey Bat!
Kept in funds by being single,
I'm prepared with yours to mingle
Cash to subsidize the tingle
You demand. So that is that.
All my cronies in committee
Vote to save you from a gritty
Set of Chambers in the City
And my partner does the same;
For we want that pair of shoulders,
On a greener Green than Golders,
Soon to mesmerize upholders
Of the game that's twice a game.
Vote to save you from a gritty
Set of Chambers in the City
And my partner does the same;
For we want that pair of shoulders,
On a greener Green than Golders,
Soon to mesmerize upholders
Of the game that's twice a game.
None has ever seen a fitter
Boy to broaden and to glitter
As a neck-or-nothing hitter
With a quantum of defence;
But, remember that a body
Quickly turns to human shoddy
If the soul's a dud. Well, Roddy,
Can you bank on Sober Sense?
Boy to broaden and to glitter
As a neck-or-nothing hitter
With a quantum of defence;
But, remember that a body
Quickly turns to human shoddy
If the soul's a dud. Well, Roddy,
Can you bank on Sober Sense?
33
Right! The Colt who would be colting
Is a youngster now revolting
From hexameters and jolting
Julius Caesar on the point.
Far from booky Rome and Greece's
Verbs that have so many pieces,
Here he dedicates to creases
Every sinew, every joint.
Is a youngster now revolting
From hexameters and jolting
Julius Caesar on the point.
Far from booky Rome and Greece's
Verbs that have so many pieces,
Here he dedicates to creases
Every sinew, every joint.
Off you go!—a flannelled rover
Till the Cricket Season's over,
When our business branch at Dover,
Rightly famous in the Port,
Will disclose the worth of bending
Grave above your desk and spending
On a job in need of mending
Care as though itself a sport.
Till the Cricket Season's over,
When our business branch at Dover,
Rightly famous in the Port,
Will disclose the worth of bending
Grave above your desk and spending
On a job in need of mending
Care as though itself a sport.
34
A SUGGESTION
Why not? For queerer things occur
Upon our planet every day;
Produce a big or little stir,
And wither in the usual way,
As anybody knows.
Remembering this, I fail to see
The reason why there cannot be,
Perhaps in Nineteen forty-three,
A Test at Kennington between
Eleven Umpires, fat or lean,
And twenty Eskimos.
Upon our planet every day;
Produce a big or little stir,
And wither in the usual way,
As anybody knows.
Remembering this, I fail to see
The reason why there cannot be,
Perhaps in Nineteen forty-three,
A Test at Kennington between
Eleven Umpires, fat or lean,
And twenty Eskimos.
Why not? This couldn't be more odd
Than playing quoits with Sadducees,
Or Polo at the Cape of Cod,
Or Duplicated Bridge with Crees,
Whose forcing bids are knives.
For fans of Frolic, what a boon
To see in either May or June
The scorer wearing a harpoon,
As though to indicate dispatch,
Should Northland fail to win the match,
Of several Surrey lives.
Than playing quoits with Sadducees,
Or Polo at the Cape of Cod,
Or Duplicated Bridge with Crees,
Whose forcing bids are knives.
For fans of Frolic, what a boon
To see in either May or June
The scorer wearing a harpoon,
As though to indicate dispatch,
Should Northland fail to win the match,
Of several Surrey lives.
35
Why not? The simple truth is this,
Dislike it starkly as we may:
Too many games are good to miss,
And others even worse than they,
If Red or White the Rose.
Consider him who can't be brought
To field because his merrythought
Is not behaving as it ought!
Besides, a fleck or two of sleet
Would never terrorize the feet
Of manly Eskimos.
Dislike it starkly as we may:
Too many games are good to miss,
And others even worse than they,
If Red or White the Rose.
Consider him who can't be brought
To field because his merrythought
Is not behaving as it ought!
Besides, a fleck or two of sleet
Would never terrorize the feet
Of manly Eskimos.
36
THE DREAM
One night the Three Selectors
Came and stood beside my bed.
I found it hard to credit
Their belief in what they said.
They begged of me to captain
The Team prepared to go
Across the sea to Bradman,
And I countered them with No!
Immediately the spokesman
Of the Three began to shout
Confoundedly, and scatter
Certain adjectives about.
Came and stood beside my bed.
I found it hard to credit
Their belief in what they said.
They begged of me to captain
The Team prepared to go
Across the sea to Bradman,
And I countered them with No!
Immediately the spokesman
Of the Three began to shout
Confoundedly, and scatter
Certain adjectives about.
On hearing that Old England
Was determined (this was odd)
To elect me for a season
As a sort of Cricket god,
I began in turn to colour
Like a beetroot, and to shout
Consumedly, and sprinkle
Other adjectives about.
Was determined (this was odd)
To elect me for a season
As a sort of Cricket god,
I began in turn to colour
Like a beetroot, and to shout
Consumedly, and sprinkle
Other adjectives about.
I told them I was busy
With an Epic in the West.
Instanter those Selectors
Were a mass upon my chest.
Surrendering, I bolted
To the Liner with a bat
And drove for four along the deck
The Steward's yellow cat.
With an Epic in the West.
Instanter those Selectors
Were a mass upon my chest.
37
To the Liner with a bat
And drove for four along the deck
The Steward's yellow cat.
When flannelled in Australia,
How I bruised the willow-wood!
How I punished Clarence Grimmett
As an English Captain should!
The total score of Bradman
When our enterprise was done—
The Ashes in my kitbag—
Was an egg denoting None.
How I bruised the willow-wood!
How I punished Clarence Grimmett
As an English Captain should!
The total score of Bradman
When our enterprise was done—
The Ashes in my kitbag—
Was an egg denoting None.
What luck! The heart of England
Would be more than peacock-proud.
My fancy heard the cheering
Of the Homeland, long and loud,
And tried to count the faces
Of the thousands come to roar
In volume, that the welkin might
Oblige, as heretofore.
Her demi-gods had silvered
Afresh the rusted shield,
Had shaken hands with Glory,
Had thunderously appealed.
The battle won, they longed to hear
The roar of London pride
Repay them for the total sum
Of handicaps defied
In honour of the deathless game
That Hambledon supplied.
Would be more than peacock-proud.
My fancy heard the cheering
Of the Homeland, long and loud,
And tried to count the faces
Of the thousands come to roar
In volume, that the welkin might
Oblige, as heretofore.
Her demi-gods had silvered
Afresh the rusted shield,
Had shaken hands with Glory,
Had thunderously appealed.
38
The roar of London pride
Repay them for the total sum
Of handicaps defied
In honour of the deathless game
That Hambledon supplied.
Well, Hope was but a cripple,
And Fancy but a cheat,
And Justice little else than rind
Of what is sour to eat.
The Dream, so patriotic,
So bewildering, so glib,
Turned out to be as duddy
As a saturated squib
Refusing to be tempted
By a gambol in the sky
When starlit merrymakers roast
Their tipsy-looking guy.
And Fancy but a cheat,
And Justice little else than rind
Of what is sour to eat.
The Dream, so patriotic,
So bewildering, so glib,
Turned out to be as duddy
As a saturated squib
Refusing to be tempted
By a gambol in the sky
When starlit merrymakers roast
Their tipsy-looking guy.
Imagine how at Waterloo
It went against the grain
To find that not a single soul
Had come to meet our train!
It went against the grain
To find that not a single soul
Had come to meet our train!
39
ENTANGLEMENT
To do my best
With bat and ball
From twelve o'clock
Till evenfall;
Maintain a length,
Avoid a blob,
Is what I call
An English job.
With bat and ball
From twelve o'clock
Till evenfall;
Maintain a length,
Avoid a blob,
Is what I call
An English job.
When days are gold
And turf is prime,
When Fours are hit
In summertime,
My head, as though
The game were done,
Begins to rhyme
For me in fun.
And turf is prime,
When Fours are hit
In summertime,
My head, as though
The game were done,
Begins to rhyme
For me in fun.
Though Captain Work
Must have me wear
Afresh for him
That pinchy pair
Of breadtime shoes,
Remembrance comes,
To sweeten care,
With sugarplums.
Must have me wear
Afresh for him
That pinchy pair
Of breadtime shoes,
Remembrance comes,
To sweeten care,
With sugarplums.
40
Do what I will
To disarray
The mental sprites
I cannot stay,
These bring the match
Not rightly due
Till Saturday,
And play it through!
To disarray
The mental sprites
I cannot stay,
These bring the match
Not rightly due
Till Saturday,
And play it through!
41
HUNGER
He was very near the Oval
When I caught his starving look.
Was he Empty Purse on holiday,
Or dole-defended crook?
I passed, then turned upon my heel
To front him, bleak and sad.
The build of head, the eyes, the chin
Were such as made me glad.
“Anything the matter, lad?
In pain?
Would a bun and cup of cocoa
Give you confidence again?”
When I caught his starving look.
Was he Empty Purse on holiday,
Or dole-defended crook?
I passed, then turned upon my heel
To front him, bleak and sad.
The build of head, the eyes, the chin
Were such as made me glad.
“Anything the matter, lad?
In pain?
Would a bun and cup of cocoa
Give you confidence again?”
He had learnt that Hobbs was nearly
At the hundred mark once more.
Of a sudden came the leather-lunged
And rolling Surrey roar.
Though sixty, I had never seen
Devotion thus employ
Beside a fence at Kennington
A starrier flash of joy.
“How about a shilling, boy?
It's yours!
Run along and watch the Master
Help himself again to Fours!”
At the hundred mark once more.
Of a sudden came the leather-lunged
And rolling Surrey roar.
Though sixty, I had never seen
Devotion thus employ
Beside a fence at Kennington
A starrier flash of joy.
“How about a shilling, boy?
It's yours!
Run along and watch the Master
Help himself again to Fours!”
42
REFLECTED GLORY
Timothy and I, we are capital companions,
Glad to be together, with a thousand tales to tell
Full of fun belonging to the various grades of Cricket,
Schoolboy, Town Club, Country House, and even Dingley Dell.
Fondly we remember how a pair of horses drew us,
Village after village, on our way to find a green
Dotted with the canvas tents that served as gay reminders
Of England's simple fashion when her Ruler was a Queen.
Glad to be together, with a thousand tales to tell
Full of fun belonging to the various grades of Cricket,
Schoolboy, Town Club, Country House, and even Dingley Dell.
Fondly we remember how a pair of horses drew us,
Village after village, on our way to find a green
Dotted with the canvas tents that served as gay reminders
Of England's simple fashion when her Ruler was a Queen.
Timothy and I, we are heart-to-heart companions
Bending over Long Ago to welcome in our zest
Rural Deans with ponytraps and chubby farmers bringing
A rivalry of lasses to adorn the local Test.
Rambling down the bygone, we recall how Billy Farmer
Scored a chimneypot-and-six one day at Horsted Keynes,
Where Sheffield Park in person, highly tickled by the damage,
Presented half a sovereign to the Slogger for his pains.
Bending over Long Ago to welcome in our zest
Rural Deans with ponytraps and chubby farmers bringing
A rivalry of lasses to adorn the local Test.
Rambling down the bygone, we recall how Billy Farmer
43
Where Sheffield Park in person, highly tickled by the damage,
Presented half a sovereign to the Slogger for his pains.
Timothy and I, we are cronies in a corner,
Turning over records of the days of win and lose.
Here we dote on what we did when supple in the Twenties,
Here at times a hand steals down in fancy to a bruise.
Surrey, Kent, and Sussex were the playing grounds when summer
Freckled us and bronzed us in our passion for The Game.
Bursting into Father's room to tell of laurels gathered
Forcibly as batsmen or as bowlers—that was fame!
Turning over records of the days of win and lose.
Here we dote on what we did when supple in the Twenties,
Here at times a hand steals down in fancy to a bruise.
Surrey, Kent, and Sussex were the playing grounds when summer
Freckled us and bronzed us in our passion for The Game.
Bursting into Father's room to tell of laurels gathered
Forcibly as batsmen or as bowlers—that was fame!
Timothy and I, in the hours of recollection,
Hear the shift of harness creaking noisy in a lane;
Note the yellowhammer with his little nervous sallies
Disappear in greenery, to come to sight again.
Pleasant was the journey to the creases of our foemen,
Pleasanter the homeward ride, with Mother at the gate
Fluttering her handkerchief, and wearying to kiss us,
And asking what on earth had kept her pair of boys so late.
Hear the shift of harness creaking noisy in a lane;
44
Disappear in greenery, to come to sight again.
Pleasant was the journey to the creases of our foemen,
Pleasanter the homeward ride, with Mother at the gate
Fluttering her handkerchief, and wearying to kiss us,
And asking what on earth had kept her pair of boys so late.
Timothy and I, we are mellow in the thewless
Wintering of muscle that has faded from the prime.
Down with black behaviour! for to envy lads upholding
England at the block-hole is to tweak the nose of Time.
Innings after innings was permitted, and he gave us
Verve in double handfuls, till he had no more to spare.
Now he nods goodhumouredly to athletes of remembrance
Snug upon a hearthrug. How we bless him for his care!
Wintering of muscle that has faded from the prime.
Down with black behaviour! for to envy lads upholding
England at the block-hole is to tweak the nose of Time.
Innings after innings was permitted, and he gave us
Verve in double handfuls, till he had no more to spare.
Now he nods goodhumouredly to athletes of remembrance
Snug upon a hearthrug. How we bless him for his care!
45
THE COMING CROP
Let men with tiny sons
So train them early that they long for runs;
And let them give potential County Caps
Convenient surfaces,
However far from smooth, on which to learn
The game that ought to be their chief concern.
So train them early that they long for runs;
And let them give potential County Caps
Convenient surfaces,
However far from smooth, on which to learn
The game that ought to be their chief concern.
For who of us can say
What star is lit for England in this way?
Three crooked lines of chalk upon a fence,
Together with a chunk
Of planking cut to shape a bat, can be
Of signal service to the M.C.C.
What star is lit for England in this way?
Three crooked lines of chalk upon a fence,
Together with a chunk
Of planking cut to shape a bat, can be
Of signal service to the M.C.C.
Some small professors hint
At coming glory with a rounded flint.
Observe! Applaud! Inspire them! Stop to help,
With all the help you have,
Such lads as may be destined to delight
Pavilions critical of spin and flight!
At coming glory with a rounded flint.
Observe! Applaud! Inspire them! Stop to help,
With all the help you have,
Such lads as may be destined to delight
Pavilions critical of spin and flight!
46
RUN OUT
To Cricket played without a crease,
Its scorers, umpires, and police,
A harrowing farewell!
All that I had to sing is sung,
And now, being very far from young,
I have no more to tell.
Its scorers, umpires, and police,
A harrowing farewell!
All that I had to sing is sung,
And now, being very far from young,
I have no more to tell.
To other pens I leave the gay
Repose of quitting work for play
Of measurement and chime,
That winged a thousand hours and kept
Me humming while the neighbours slept
In ignorance of rhyme.
Repose of quitting work for play
Of measurement and chime,
That winged a thousand hours and kept
Me humming while the neighbours slept
In ignorance of rhyme.
Though often fretted by a fix,
Merry I moved among the tricks
Of shaping nimble verse,
Sorry at times to do no better
For what had made me long a debtor,
Glad to have done no worse.
Merry I moved among the tricks
Of shaping nimble verse,
Sorry at times to do no better
For what had made me long a debtor,
Glad to have done no worse.
| Close of play | |