The Poet's Ramble after Riches or, a Night's Transactions Upon the Road Burlesqu'd; With Reflections on a Dissenting Corporation: Together, With the Authors Lamentation, in the time of Adversity [by Edward Ward] |
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Reflections on a Dissenting Corporation. |
 | The Poet's Ramble after Riches |  |
Reflections on a Dissenting Corporation.
The Town it is a Corporation,
Where Women all have Toleration
For Universal Copulation.
Where Women all have Toleration
For Universal Copulation.
Of what Degree so e'er, or Function,
The Females never want Conjunction,
Or that blest Ointment, Humane Unction.
The Females never want Conjunction,
Or that blest Ointment, Humane Unction.
Adultery, and Fornication
Are Licens'd through the Corporation,
As proper Means for Generation.
Are Licens'd through the Corporation,
As proper Means for Generation.
Cuckolds and Misers here are plenty,
Many Mechannicks, and few Gentry,
Whose Bags are full, as Skulls are empty.
Many Mechannicks, and few Gentry,
Whose Bags are full, as Skulls are empty.
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Honest Men pretious are as Rubies,
Their Mayors Successively are Boobies,
And Aldermen great Brawny Loobies.
Their Mayors Successively are Boobies,
And Aldermen great Brawny Loobies.
The Top o'th' Town are Petty-Foggers,
The Mean are Mercers and Corn-Jobbers,
The Lowest Common Whores and Robbers.
The Mean are Mercers and Corn-Jobbers,
The Lowest Common Whores and Robbers.
Their Justices, to speak the best on,
Are Country 'Squires, the People rest on;
But Fools enough, you need not question.
Are Country 'Squires, the People rest on;
But Fools enough, you need not question.
As for Religions, there are many
Profest, but few that practice any;
They'd deny God to gain a Penny.
Profest, but few that practice any;
They'd deny God to gain a Penny.
The Puny sort are kind of Franticks,
Who Pray and Prate on Stools, like Anticks,
Follow'd by Spiritual Pedanticks.
Who Pray and Prate on Stools, like Anticks,
Follow'd by Spiritual Pedanticks.
They Cackle Doctrine by the Spirit,
Who Lye, and say they shall Inherit
A Heavenly Kingdom, by the Spirit.
Who Lye, and say they shall Inherit
A Heavenly Kingdom, by the Spirit.
Yea and Nay's their Communication,
Swearing they hold's Abomination,
But Whoring, as a small Transgression.
Swearing they hold's Abomination,
But Whoring, as a small Transgression.
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For all their Canting, Pious Prating,
And Godly Humming at their Meeting;
Yet, Lawyer like, they live by Cheating.
And Godly Humming at their Meeting;
Yet, Lawyer like, they live by Cheating.
The Rest are Presbyter-Dissenters,
These are the Herd the Devil enters;
They are all Sinners, no Repenters.
These are the Herd the Devil enters;
They are all Sinners, no Repenters.
This is the Godly Tribe we read of,
Who Cut the Royal Martyr's Head off;
These are the Rogues the Devil has need of.
Who Cut the Royal Martyr's Head off;
These are the Rogues the Devil has need of.
So fixt, their Principles ne'er alter,
So Honest, each deserves a Halter,
So Learned, scarce one can Read his Psalter.
So Honest, each deserves a Halter,
So Learned, scarce one can Read his Psalter.
'Tis true, the Pastors of the Zealous,
Such Doctrines will in Tub reveal us,
You'd think 'twas Magick from Cornelius.
Such Doctrines will in Tub reveal us,
You'd think 'twas Magick from Cornelius.
At such deeping Notions they'll be reaching,
That all the tedious hours they're Teaching,
You'd think them Conjuring, not Preaching.
That all the tedious hours they're Teaching,
You'd think them Conjuring, not Preaching.
Their Lawyers, by Gods great Mercy,
Enough of Lattin can Rehearse ye,
To fill up Nov'rint Universi.
Enough of Lattin can Rehearse ye,
To fill up Nov'rint Universi.
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To give more ample Definition
Of these, the Wedges of Sedition,
We'll do't by way of Supposition.
Of these, the Wedges of Sedition,
We'll do't by way of Supposition.
They th'Benefit of th'Clergy needing,
I doubt, but few, for all their pleading,
Could save their Necks by their right Reading.
I doubt, but few, for all their pleading,
Could save their Necks by their right Reading.
The Top of these the Town Relies on;
I dare not say but he's a Wise Man,
And Honest as their Fat Excise Man.
I dare not say but he's a Wise Man,
And Honest as their Fat Excise Man.
What if they all were Fools, what then?
They may be Wiser, God knows when,
But Cuckolds still; Wives say Amen.
They may be Wiser, God knows when,
But Cuckolds still; Wives say Amen.
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