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A postscript to the new Bath guide

A Poem by Anthony Pasquin [i.e. John Williams]
Pasquin, Anthony (1761-1818)

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[dedication]
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POSTSCRIPT TO THE NEW BATH GUIDE.
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LETTER I. Horace Peery, Esq; to Bob Classic, at Oxford.
  
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The Man's Twenty Reasons for not doing as he was desired.
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LETTER II. Horace Peery, Esq; to Bob Classic, at Oxford.
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LETTER III. Horace Peery, Esq; to Bob Classic, at Oxford.
  
A CORPORATION DINNER.
  
CHRISTIAN ADMONITION.
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LETTER IV. Major General Firebrand, to Colonel Carbuncle, at the Horse-Guards.
  
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POSTSCRIPT.
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LETTER V. Horace Peery, Esq; to Bob Classic, at Oxford.
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LETTER VI. The Countess of Cockles, (a dramatic Author) to the Honourable Miss Fanny Fitzkickerly, in Portman-Square.
  
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THE BROWN JUGS.
  
POSTSCRIPT.
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LETTER VII. Horace Peery, Esq; to Bob Classic, at Oxford.
  
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THE OATH.
  
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LETTER VIII. Margery Cockney, to Agnes Blowzy, at Weymouth in Dorsetshire.
  
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POSTSCRIPT.
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LETTER IX. Horace Peery, Esq; to Bob Classic, at Oxford.
  
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An ELEGY written in Soho-Square, on seeing Mrs. Cornelys' House in Ruins.
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LETTER X. Phalim O'Shaughnessy, valet to Viscount Bandash, to his kinsman Bryan O'Geohegan, at Castle-Blunderbuss, near Cunnemara, County of Galway, Connaught, Ireland.
  
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THE FUTURE TENSE,
  
AN APOLOGY For not weeping over the Remains of a Female Friend.
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LETTER XI. Correggio Candid, to the celebrated Mr. Daniel, of Bath.
  
The Portrait-Painter's Golden Rules.
  
The POINT of ASTONISHMENT.
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LETTER XII. Horace Peery, Esq; to Bob Classic, at Oxford.
  
The BEAUTIES of BATH.
  
A CELESTIAL BILL OF FARE. MISS W*******N.
  
MISS C*****E.
  
MISS B***Y.
  
THE MISS J***S's.
  
THE MISS M***KS.
  
THE MISS W******KS.
  
ELIZA.
  
MISS FULLER.
  
VERSES TO THE WITTY AND BEAUTIFUL MISS ANNE FULLER.
  
POSTSCRIPT.
  
ELEGIACK VERSES ON THE DEATH OF THE LATE MARCHIONESS OF LANSDOWN.
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LETTER XIII. Alice Blowzy, to Margery Cockney, at Bath.
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LETTER XIV. Horace Peery, Esq; to Bob Classic, at Oxford.
  
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A COLLOQUY in the ROOMS.
  
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The Attorney and the Publican.
  
POETICK ADMONITION TO DOCTOR LONG OF BATH,

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The Man's Twenty Reasons for not doing as he was desired.

A TALE.

When Carolus Secundus, and his suite
Of Barons, Baronets, and Knights to boot:
With Lords and Lacqueys old and young,
Pass'd through some little corporated place,
'Twas keen observ'd by Buckingham's wild Grace
The Bells had not been rung.
Touch'd by the sentiment his minion spoke,
Voluptuous Charles, who lov'd a joke,
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With seeming anger call'd the Mayor before him,
And thus began to bore him:
‘What is the reason,’ said the merry King,
‘When I am present, that no bellmen ring?
‘Aye, by my scepter, friend, you well may stare:’—
“I'll give you twenty reasons,” said the Mayor,
“If I my mind may tell free:
“But first—we have no bells within the belfry.”—
‘I need no other reasons, you're so wise,’
Exclaim'd the King, with high-wrought mirth inspir'd,
Shaking his sides, he wip'd his tear-full eyes:
The Courtiers titter'd, and the Mayor retir'd.
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