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SATIR.

[Even like the chalking Vintners at the barre]

Even like the chalking Vintners at the barre,
That bids all welcome, what so e're they are:
So they passe quiet, in and out a doore,
And make no swaggering to discharge their score
I Satir, stand at entrance of this booke,
And each kind guest may for my welcome looke:
All pleasant humours I inuite come here,
And with these Epigrams make thē cheere:
Let Melancholie walke most dogged by,
All sprightly Poets doe the same defie,
To feast with wit he neuer had good tast,
I scorne to haue him at our Table plast.
Let him goe plod for leases, buy and sell,
And day by day his bags of money tell,
And grudge to giue himselfe a pint of Wine,
Out arrant Asse, he is no guest of mine.
But all mirths friends, I doe embrace most kind,
Better I wish, pray take such as you find.

SATYRS.

SATYR. 7.

[Liu'd the Philosopher Heraclitus]

Liu'd the Philosopher Heraclitus
In Troynouant, as once in Ephesus.
Were not Democrites liue, s-date full done,
But he with vs an's glasse some sand to runne?
How would the first, dry-weepe his watry eyes?
And th'others laughter eccho through the skies?
For while they in this world were resident,
Heraclitus for vertues banishment,
Perform'd a pensiue teare, complaining part:
Democrites, he laugh'd euen from his hart,
Spending his time in a continuall iest,
To see base Vice so highly in request.
Weepe Vertues want, and giue sad sighes to boote:
Vice rides on horsedacke, Vertue goes on foote:
Yet laugh againe as fast on th'others side,
To see so vile a scumme prefer'd to ride.
But what wilt helpe to sigh on flinty sin?
T'will not be mollifide as it hath bin:
Tis farre more highly fauour'd then before,
Sin's no beggar standing at the dore,
That by his patches doth his want dispute,
But a right welcome Sir, for's costly sute:
And maske about with such an ostentation:
World saies; Vice-haters loues no recreation.
You shall haue smooth-fac'd neate dissimulation,
A true What lacke ye? by his occupation:
Will (I in trueth, yes truely) shew you ware,
All London cannot with his stuffe compare:
Nay, if you match it (go from him to any)
Take his for nothing, pay him not a penny.
At this, my simple honest Country-man
Takes Trueth and Truely for a Puritan;
And dares in's conscience sweare he loues no lying
But that they deale for, he giues him the buying.
To let him haue a peniworth he is willing,
Yet for a groates worth makes him pay a shilling;
Giues goodman Trollop one thing for an other,
And saies, hee'le vse him as he were his brother:
But while his eares with brothers tearms he feeds,
He proueth but a Coosen in his deedes:
Brotherhood once in kindred bore the sway,
But that dates out, and Coosnage hath the day.
The foregone ages that are spent and donne,
The old time past, that calls time present, Sonne;
Saw better years, & more plaine meaning howers
Then presently, or future following ours.
The world is naught and now vpon the ending,
Grows worse & worse, & fardest off frō mending
Seuen grand diuels bred and borne in hell.
Are grac'd like Monarchs on the earth to dwell:
where they comand the worlds whole globy roūd
Leauing poore Vertuous life no dwelling ground.
Pride is the first, and he began with Eue,
Whose cognisance still's worne on womens sleeue
He fits the humors of them in their kinde,
With euery moneth, new liueries to their minde:
A buske, a maske, a fanne, a monstrous ruffe,
A boulster for their buttockes, and such stuffe:
More light & toyish then the wind-blowne chaffe
As though they meant to make the diuell laffe.
The next that marcheth is the roote of euill,
Call'd Couetousnesse, a greedy rascall deuill:
To fill old yron barred chests, he rakes,
great rents for little Cottages he takes:
Hordeth vp corne, in hope to haue a yeere,
Fit for his cut-throat humor to sell deere.
Then is there a notorious bawdy feend,
Nam'd Lecherie, who all his time doth spend
In two wheeld Coach, and bason occupation
Making a vaulting house his recreation,
Vnto his doore in summer howerly marches,
And euery Tearme looke for him in the Arches.
Enuie's the fourth, a Diuell dogged sprighted;
In others harmes he chiefly is delighted:
His heart against all charity is steeld,
His frownes are all challenges to the field:
Though nothing crosse him, yet he murmers euer
He laughes at some mans losse, or els laughs neuer.
Wrath is the next, that swaggers, fights, & sweates,
In Fleetstreete brauely at it by the eares:
Parboild in rage, pepperd in heate of ire,
Hot liuerd, and as chollericke as fire.
Vitlers and Sergants are beholden to him,
Till halter destenie, of life vndo him.
Sixe lubberly gorbelled deuill great,
Is Gluttony, swolne with excesse of meate:
His belliship containes th'insatiate gut,
Paunch'd liquor proofe, an'twere a Malmsie-but,
Dulled with drinke: this is his vsuall phraise,
Yet one quart, and a morsell more, he saies.
The last is Sloth, a lazie diuelish cur,
So trust in Idlenesse, he scarce can stur:
Lumpish and heauy thoughts, of Sathans giuing,
That rather begs, then labours for his liuing.
These seuen are feends come forth of Hells darke
On earth seducing soules, misguiding men.