Philomythie or Philomythologie wherein Outlandish Birds, Beasts, and Fishes, are taught to speake true English plainely. By Tho: Scot ... The second edition much inlarged |
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AN IRISH BANQVET, OR THE Mayors feast of Youghall. |
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 | Philomythie or Philomythologie |  |
AN IRISH BANQVET, OR THE Mayors feast of Youghall.
Tales many haue been told by men of yore,
Of Giants, Dragons, and of halfe a score
Worthies saue one, of Castles, kings and knights,
Of Ladies loues, of Turnaies, and such sights
As Mandeuile ne're saw; yet none like this
Which my Muse howles: then listen what it is.
Of Giants, Dragons, and of halfe a score
Worthies saue one, of Castles, kings and knights,
Of Ladies loues, of Turnaies, and such sights
As Mandeuile ne're saw; yet none like this
Which my Muse howles: then listen what it is.
Saturne grew old, and the gods did agree,
That Ioue should him depriue of Soueraigntie,
And become chiefe himselfe. A solemne day
Appointed was, when all the Gods most gay,
Attired in mantles faire, and truses strange,
Came to behold this Lecher-like lou'd change.
The frie of all the Gods was there beside,
And each his bastard had, his Whore and Bride.
The milk-white path which to Ioues Pallace leades,
In comely order all this rich troope treades.
Ceres threw wheate vpon Ioues face most daintie,
Presaging and forespeaking future plenty.
The well-instructed swine did follow after,
And for the wheat left something that was softer,
Ciuet, like Irish sope. Sweete naturde beasts,
Fit waiters at such ciuill solemne feasts.
At length the traine reach't the high Hall of Ioue.
The Gods sat downe, the Goddesses then stroue
For place and state: but Iuno most demurely,
Plac'de and displac'de that day, as pleasde her surely,
The tables stood full crownde with dainty dishes,
Enough to satisfie the idle wishes
Of longing Wiues, or Maids grown green and sickly,
With eating fruit, and doing nothing quickly.
Huge hands of butter not yet fully blue,
With quiuering custards of a doubtfull hue.
Stewde prune, and bread that passeth Malahane.
And honny sweeter farre then sugar cane.
Greene apples and such plenty of small Nuts.
That therewith safely one might fill his guts,
Though he were sure the Cookes were Irish sluts.
The goblets sweld with pride, themselues to see,
So full of French and Spanish wines to be.
Nectar-like Vsqua-bath, or Aqua-vitæ,
And browne Ale growne in yeeres and strength most mighty
Was there as plentifull a Bonniclabbar,
That euery guest his cleane lickt lips might slabbar
In full satiety, till they were crownde
With Bacchus wreathes, and in still slumber drownde.
The fidling Spheeres made musicke all the while
And riming Bardes braue meeter did compile
To grace this feast: when Phœbus standing vp
Tooke in his greasie fist a greasier cup
And drunke to Daphnes health. Bacchus replide
And straightway quaft another to the bride
Of Mulciber. This health past all along.
Then Mars his feather wagde amongst the throng
Carowsing Pallas health (braue wench and wise)
Which draught cost bonny Cupid both his eyes,
Straining to pledge it. Maias sonne stood still,
And stilly mark't how Ganimed did fill
The seuerall healths, which swiftly past around
Till all the Gods, and Goddesses had bound
Their browes with wreathes of Iuy leaues and vines,
And each his forehead to his knee enclines.
Apollo then slipt thence, and being halfe drunke
His burning bonnet doft, and slily sunke
His head in Thetis lap. So heauen lost light,
And cheerefull day was damp't with irksome night.
Ioue yet disposde to mirth, bad Iuno spread
Her Starry mantle or'e the worlds blacke head.
But she inrag'de with plumpe Lyeus iuice,
And mad with iealousie, without excuse
Refusde to guild the then vnspangled skie,
With th'eyes of Argus her cow-keeping spie.
And aided by Necessitie, and Fate,
And all the shrewder Goddesses, Ioues state
She durst assume, and boldly presse as farre
As all the Gyants in their ciuill warre.
They first bound Ioue, then all the other Gods,
Who were constrain'd by darknes, drinke, and th'ods
Of this conspiracie, to condescend
To hard conditions for a quiet end.
Ioue granted Iuno power of all the ayre,
Her frowne or smile makes weather fowle or faire.
His thunderbolts and lightning she may take,
And with her tongue the worlds firmes axtree shake.
From hence do women their free charter hold,
To rule gainst reason, or else cry and scold.
Proserpina obtained of her Pluto,
That such should only speed, who she-saints sue to:
That all affaires of man in state or purse
His wife should sway, or women that are worse.
From whence this custome springs in towne and city,
The wife growes rich, the bankerout begs for pitty.
Venus got leaue to lie with all that loue her.
And that no sawcy god should once reproue her:
That Mars and she might dally, whil'st Don Vulcan
Should freely to their pleasures drinke a full can.
Frō whence this vse proceeds, that wiues once wātons
Wage seruants, as the French the Swizzers Cantons.
You that are Statists looke vnto this geare,
Do not Tyrone and his rash striplings feare;
Feare not Tirconnel, nor those Galliglasses
That cut, and hacke, and carue men as it passes:
Feare those which all these feare, those fathers holy
Which make the whole world their sole monopoly:
That crowne & vncrowne Kings, when as they please,
Play fast and loose like Iuglers with slight ease;
Dissolue all othes, though made with hand and heart,
those they ioyne with, lest too late
We finde our Ile an Amazonian state,
Where none but women, Priests and Cocknies keepe
As close as young Papirius, and as deepe,
And none but these state mysteries may know,
Lest they to more fooles then themselues should show
The treasons, stratagems, and golden fables
Which are proiected at their Councell tables.
If this aduice be good, crie, Ioue be thanked,
And with that short grace close my Irish banquet,
That Ioue should him depriue of Soueraigntie,
And become chiefe himselfe. A solemne day
Appointed was, when all the Gods most gay,
Attired in mantles faire, and truses strange,
Came to behold this Lecher-like lou'd change.
The frie of all the Gods was there beside,
And each his bastard had, his Whore and Bride.
The milk-white path which to Ioues Pallace leades,
In comely order all this rich troope treades.
Ceres threw wheate vpon Ioues face most daintie,
Presaging and forespeaking future plenty.
The well-instructed swine did follow after,
And for the wheat left something that was softer,
Ciuet, like Irish sope. Sweete naturde beasts,
Fit waiters at such ciuill solemne feasts.
At length the traine reach't the high Hall of Ioue.
The Gods sat downe, the Goddesses then stroue
For place and state: but Iuno most demurely,
Plac'de and displac'de that day, as pleasde her surely,
Enough to satisfie the idle wishes
Of longing Wiues, or Maids grown green and sickly,
With eating fruit, and doing nothing quickly.
Huge hands of butter not yet fully blue,
With quiuering custards of a doubtfull hue.
Stewde prune, and bread that passeth Malahane.
And honny sweeter farre then sugar cane.
Greene apples and such plenty of small Nuts.
That therewith safely one might fill his guts,
Though he were sure the Cookes were Irish sluts.
The goblets sweld with pride, themselues to see,
So full of French and Spanish wines to be.
Nectar-like Vsqua-bath, or Aqua-vitæ,
And browne Ale growne in yeeres and strength most mighty
Was there as plentifull a Bonniclabbar,
That euery guest his cleane lickt lips might slabbar
In full satiety, till they were crownde
With Bacchus wreathes, and in still slumber drownde.
The fidling Spheeres made musicke all the while
And riming Bardes braue meeter did compile
To grace this feast: when Phœbus standing vp
Tooke in his greasie fist a greasier cup
And drunke to Daphnes health. Bacchus replide
And straightway quaft another to the bride
Of Mulciber. This health past all along.
Then Mars his feather wagde amongst the throng
Carowsing Pallas health (braue wench and wise)
Which draught cost bonny Cupid both his eyes,
Straining to pledge it. Maias sonne stood still,
And stilly mark't how Ganimed did fill
The seuerall healths, which swiftly past around
Their browes with wreathes of Iuy leaues and vines,
And each his forehead to his knee enclines.
Apollo then slipt thence, and being halfe drunke
His burning bonnet doft, and slily sunke
His head in Thetis lap. So heauen lost light,
And cheerefull day was damp't with irksome night.
Ioue yet disposde to mirth, bad Iuno spread
Her Starry mantle or'e the worlds blacke head.
But she inrag'de with plumpe Lyeus iuice,
And mad with iealousie, without excuse
Refusde to guild the then vnspangled skie,
With th'eyes of Argus her cow-keeping spie.
And aided by Necessitie, and Fate,
And all the shrewder Goddesses, Ioues state
She durst assume, and boldly presse as farre
As all the Gyants in their ciuill warre.
They first bound Ioue, then all the other Gods,
Who were constrain'd by darknes, drinke, and th'ods
Of this conspiracie, to condescend
To hard conditions for a quiet end.
Ioue granted Iuno power of all the ayre,
Her frowne or smile makes weather fowle or faire.
His thunderbolts and lightning she may take,
And with her tongue the worlds firmes axtree shake.
From hence do women their free charter hold,
To rule gainst reason, or else cry and scold.
Proserpina obtained of her Pluto,
That such should only speed, who she-saints sue to:
That all affaires of man in state or purse
His wife should sway, or women that are worse.
From whence this custome springs in towne and city,
Venus got leaue to lie with all that loue her.
And that no sawcy god should once reproue her:
That Mars and she might dally, whil'st Don Vulcan
Should freely to their pleasures drinke a full can.
Frō whence this vse proceeds, that wiues once wātons
Wage seruants, as the French the Swizzers Cantons.
You that are Statists looke vnto this geare,
Do not Tyrone and his rash striplings feare;
Feare not Tirconnel, nor those Galliglasses
That cut, and hacke, and carue men as it passes:
Feare those which all these feare, those fathers holy
Which make the whole world their sole monopoly:
That crowne & vncrowne Kings, when as they please,
Play fast and loose like Iuglers with slight ease;
Dissolue all othes, though made with hand and heart,
those they ioyne with, lest too late
We finde our Ile an Amazonian state,
Where none but women, Priests and Cocknies keepe
As close as young Papirius, and as deepe,
And none but these state mysteries may know,
Lest they to more fooles then themselues should show
The treasons, stratagems, and golden fables
Which are proiected at their Councell tables.
If this aduice be good, crie, Ioue be thanked,
And with that short grace close my Irish banquet,
| Philomythie or Philomythologie | |