University of Virginia Library

A merry Marriage: A Stratagem.

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Tune, Do but view this glass of Claret.

1

This new Song that I would sell you
Some suppose is very true,
Where 'twas done I may not tell you,
Time will bring it to your view;
What I mean now to reveal you,
Is both witty, queint, and new.

2

In a place as yet unplunder'd
An old Usurer did dwell,
Who took fifty in the hunderd,
Some can by experience tell;
But his son in Taverns thunder'd,
And did strow't abroad as well:

3

Young and handsome, bred a Scholar,
Never free from Tavern scores,
But his Father full of dolor
Turns my Gallant out of doors;
Swearing in a cruel choller,
That he spent his means with whores.

60

4

He besides him had a Daughter,
Young and lovely, fair and bright,
She was worth the looking after,
For her Portion was not light;
But the trick that's worth your laughter,
Will appear anon at night.

5

Not far off a Widow dwelt that
Was both pretty, young and wise,
This old fellow quickly smelt that
She would prove a golden prize;
In his clean Ruff, and his Felt Hat
He to her a wooing hyes.

6

Such good entertainment she made,
That he thought she was his own;
But the wanton son that he had
Came as soon as he was gone,
Told her plainly he should be mad,
If she would not hear his moan.

7

When she saw his youth and feature
To be confident and kinde,
She did covet much the creature,
But his wildeness chang'd her minde;
And contrary to her nature
Said he should no favour finde.

8

This did quite confound the Lover,
But her kinsman was his friend:

61

Who unto him did discover
What a plot he did intend;
I know what (quoth he) shall move her,
And shall gain her in the end.

9

Soon at night do you come hither,
If you will the Widdow wed,
You shall all night lye beneath her,
Close conveigh'd under her bed;
When you are so near together,
Ten to one you will be sped:

10

But before you come I'le swear you,
Though you lye upon the lurch,
That you honestly will bear you,
Till you both have been at Church,
Else revenge I vow shall tear you
Ten times more then brine and birch.

11

To this plot they both consented,
But another plot's in hand,
A poor Knight is discontented
For the morgage of his Land;
For it seems the devil sent it
Unto this old Miser's hand.

12

This Knight with money doth desire it,
But because the day is past,
This Curmudgeon doth require it
As a forfeiture at last;

62

But his Daughter doth admire
The patience of the Knight so crost.

13

She's in love and dares not shew it,
By her Brother she was betray'd;
For by him the Knight doth know it,
Who with love salutes the Maid;
She doth well consent unto it,
The Match at midnight must be made.

14

Therefore he doth thus advise her,
To the widows you shall go,
For your Brother will surprize her,
E're the morning comes I know;
Bring my Morgage, lest your wiser
Father plot our overthrow.

15

All is done, and now the morning
Through the widdows window peeps,
He provided 'gainst all scorning,
Out into her Chamber creeps;
She cryes out, whilst he is turning
To her to secure her lips:

16

There he vows if she will marry,
He'l become a civil man,
But if not, she shall miscarry
In her reputation;
For he swears he there will tarry,
Till her credit's quite undone.

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17

He calls up his Friend and Sister
To be witness to the Match,
Who but for this trick had mist her,
For he caught her on the Catch;
There before them all he kist her,
To the Church they all dispatch.

18

When the Usurer did hear that
He was cheated of his wife,
And his Daughter, he did swear that
He would strait reform his life;
Then he bids them joy, and prayes that
Their midnight Match may know no strife.