University of Virginia Library

Vol. I. Ballads on the condition of England in Henry VIII's and Edward VI's reigns, (Including the State of the Clergy, Monks and Friars,) On Wolsey and Anne Boleyn.

The Image of Ypocresye.

I. [PART I.—AGAINST THE CLERGY GENERALLY, THEIR HYPOCRISY AND VICES.]

Vpon [the hipocrysye?]
of the Cruell C[ler]gy,
And the pro[u]de prelacy [?],
that now do looke so hie,
as though that by and by
they wold clymbe & fflye
vp to the Clowdy Skye:
wher all men may espye,
by fals hipocrysye
Thei Long haue Blered the Eye
of all the world well nye;
Comytting Apostacie
against that verytye
That thei can not Denye:
in which how shamlessly
They do [cavil?] and lye,
ther concyens testyfye,
The poppe[?] [OMITTED] Res
Curtezens & [?] [OMITTED]
The Rest of Balam Markes, [?]
That be heresyarkes,
Which do Comy[t?] ther warkes,
As one that in the Darke ys,
And wotes not wher the marke ys,
Do take the kites for larkes.
suche be owr primates,
Our bisshopps and prelates,
[Our par]sons and [curates,]
With other like estates
that were shaven pates;
As monkes white and blacke,
And Channons that cane chatte,
Glottons ffayre and fatte,
With ffriers of the sacke,
And brothers of the bagg,
As nymble as a nagg,
That cane bothe prate and bragg,
To make the pulpett wagge
with Twenty thousand lyes,
Do make the blind Eate flyes,
and blere our symple Eyes,
To make vs to beleve
God morowe is god eve;
for pleynly to be breve,
so nye they do vs dreve,
That we, to our great greve,
Must sey that white is blacke,
Or elles they sey we smacke,
And smell we wote not what:
But then beware the Catt;
for yf they smell a Ratt,
they grisely chide and chatt,
and, haue him by the Iack,
A fagott for his backe,
or, Take him to the Racke,
And drowne hyme in a sacke,
Or burne hyme on [a] stake!
lo, thus they vndertake
The trothe false to make!
Alas, for christ his sake!
is the sonne-light darke,
Or ignoraunc[e] a clarke,
bycawse that thei hath powre
To send men to the towre,
the Simple to devowre?
if they Lyst to Lowre,
ys Suger therfor Sowre?
dothe five and three make ffour?
As well, I durst be bolde,
To sey the ffier were colde.
But yet they worke muche worse,
when they for blissinge cowrse;
for father friska Jolly,
And pater pecke a lolly,
That be all full of folly,
Doo fayne them seem holy,
For ther monopoly,
And ther private welthe
That they haue take by stelthe
And in the churche they lurke,
As ill as any turke,
so proudely they vsurpe,
Besyde the spritt of christ,
The office of a pryste
in any wise to take,
As thoughe it were a iape,
To Runne in att the Rove;
for some of them do Prove
To clyme vpp ere they knowe
The doore from the wyndowe;
They may not stope alowe,
But backe bend as a bowe;
they make an outwarde showe,
And so forthe one a rowe,
As dapper as a Crowe,
And perte as any pye,
And lighte as any ffly.
At borde and at table
They be full servysable,
Sober and demure,
acquayntans to allure,
wher they may be Sure
by any Craft or trayne
To fyshe for any gayne,
or wayt for any wynnyng,—
A prestly begynnynge!
for many a hyerlinge,
With a wilde fyerlinge,
whan his credyte is most,
with mikell brag and bost
Shall pryck owt as a post,
Chafy[n]g lyke myne hoste,
As hott as any toste,
And Ride from cost to cost,
And then shall Rule the Rost.
And some avaunced be
for ther Auncente,
Throughe ther Antiquitye,
Be all innequitye;
yett be they called
To the Charge of the fald,
Because they be balled,
And be for bisshopps stalled.
And some kepe ther stations
In owtwarde straunge natyons,
Lernynge invocatyons,
And craftye in-Cantatyons;
And so by inchantement
Gette theyr avauncement.
And some by fayned favour
for honour or for havour,
By voyses boughte and solde,
for sylver and for golde,
for lande, for Rente or ffee,
Or by Authoritye
Of menn of hye degree,
Or for some qualitye,
As many of them bee,
for ther Actyvitee,
ther practyse and Industrye,
Sleyght, Craft, and knavery,
in matters of bawdery,
Or by helpe of kynne,
An Easy liffe to wynne.
I swere by saincte mary,
He that thus dothe cary
is a mercenary,
Yea, a sangunary,
A pastore for to pull
Of bothe skynne and wolle.
Thoughe christ be the doer,
They force not of his looer,
They sett therby no stoore;
Ther stody is for moore:
And I tell youe therfore
That they ther tyme temper
with a provisoo semper
An other wey to enter,
for love of wordely good,
Not forcinge of the fflode
Of hyme that bledd the Roode;
It is not for ther moode.
they make Deambulacyons
With great ostentations,
And loke for salutations
On every mannes face,
As in the merkett place
To saye, god saue your grace!
Thus in churche and chepinge,
Wher they may haue metinge
With lordes and with ladyes,
To be called Rabyes:
Nowe god saue these dadyes,
And all ther yonge babyes!
The holy worde of god
Is by these men forbod;
Pater noster and Creede
They vtterly forbeede
To be said or songe
In our vulgar tonge.
Ohe lorde! thou hast great wronge
Of these that shoulde be trustye,
Whiche sey the breade is musty,
And with ther lawe vnlusty
Make it Rusty and dusty!
But I do thinke it Rustye
for lacke of exercyse:
Wherfore they be vnwise
That will the lawe despise,
And daylye newe devyse,
So Dyvers and so straunge,
Which chaunge and rechaunge
Of fastinges and of feestes,
Of bowes and behestes,
With many of ther iestes,
As thoughe lay men wer bestes;
As many of vs bee,
That may and will not see,
Nor ones cast vpp an Eye,
These Iugglinges to espye;
for this that nowe is vsed
Is efte ageyne refused,
Chaunged or mysvsed,
That we be still abused:
The lawe that servethe nowe,
Ageyne they disalowe.
Thus forthe and backe,
With bryve and with bull
They dayly plucke and pull,
And yett be never ffull;
for wher one bull makes,
An other bull forsakes;
The thyrde yett vndertakes
To alter all of newe:
Thus none will other sue.
Wherfore, by swete Iesu,
I thinke they be vntrewe
That iuggle tyme and tyme
To gett thyne and myne;
Yea, thoughe the worlde pynne,
No man wyll they spare,
So they ther pelfe prefarre,
The lawes to make and marre,
To bynde vs nere and farre;
Wherto may be no barre
In peace tyme nor in warre;
for none ther is that darre
Replye ageyne or speake,
This Daunce of thers to breake;
The trouthe it is so weeke:
They make all men cry creake,
Or fry them to a steake,—
Adieu, Sir huddy-peake!
lo, peters barge is leake,
And redy for to synke;
Beware yett least youe drinke;
God dothe not slepe nor wynke,
But sethe lande and brynke;
And yf ye take the chynke,
I feare me ye will stynke,
And Corrupt your vnctyon
With An iniunctyon;
Your pride and presumption,
In abvsing your functyon,
Will breade a consumtion,
And make a resumption,
To bringe youe to compunction;
Youre lawes falsely grounded,
that hath the world Surounded,
By trouthe shalbe Confounded.
Thoughe ye be lordes digne,
Ye shoulde no man maligne,
But ever be benyngne;
And namely in suche Case
Wher god his gyfte or grace
lyst to plante or place:
The poore man, or the Riche,
Is To his pleasure lyche;
for christ, our derest lorde,
That made the full accorde,
As Scripture dothe Recorde,
Betwyxt god and man,
Suppressynge Sattan
and all his kingdom, whan
Vpon the holy Roode
he shadd his blissed bloode,
As muche for one as other,
Exceptinge not his mother,
made every man his brother,
As many as ther bee
In faythe and charitee.
But nowe by fals abvsyon,
The Clergy by Collution,
Without good Conclution,
haue broughte vs to Confution,
And made An illution:
By great inyquytie,
Avaunt them selfes to be
No lesse then godes, yee,
of equall authorytye;
Whiche, by Ipocrysye,
to exalt ther dignytye,
Call vs the leude lay ffee,
men of temporalitee;
But they pretend to bee
A people Eternall,
of powr Supernall:
I fere me, infernall;
for they that be carnall,
Idolaters to Baall,
And nothinge gostely at all,
Be named spirituall;
for so we must them Calle,
As we Aye do and shall,
What happe so ever falle.
Ther Successyon may not dye,
But lyve eternallye;
for, without question,
perpetuall Succession
They haue from one to other,
As childer of ther mother;
Yea, they kepe all in store
That other hadd afore,
And daylye gather more.
lo, thus the people rore,
As on a fistred Sore
of matter most vnpure,
that thei ar dryven to indure
Tyll god him Self send Cure!
That as youe be possessors,
So be yee Successors
Vnto your predecessors:
And yet ye be questors,
and hoorders vppe of testers;
ye daylye cache and gather
Of mother and of father,
And of no man Rather
Then of your poore brother,
And of euery other;
Yea, all that Comes is gayne;
youe passe of no mans payne,
Whiche ye all wey reteyne;
who ever grudge or playne,
It may not out agayne;
Noughte may be Remitted
That to youe is Commytted;
Ye be not so lighte witted.
The people thinke it true
That ye possession sue
To haue an Easy life,
Without debate or strife,
To lyve without a wife,
lordely and at Ease,
Without payne or disease,
your belly god to please,
And worldly welth to haue:
Ye do your heeades shave,
To make youe sure and save
in every wind and wave,
That wolde as sone Rave
As ones to chippe an heare
So farre aboue your Eare,
Or suche an habite weare,
With a polled heade,
To fayne your selves deade;
But for possessions sake
That ye suche Rules take,
And bynde youe to the brake,
That ye maye not forsake
Durynge all your lyves:
So well is he that thrives.
Thus be youe spirituall;
And yett ye do vs call
But lewde and temporall;
And that is for that we
So weake and simple be,
To put oure possession
from oure Succession
And heires lyniall,
Or kynne Collaterall,
That be menn temporall,
And so from lyne to lyne;
for ech man for his tyme
Sayes, “while it is myne,
I will give while I maye,
That, when I am away,
They shall both singe and saye,
And for my Soules helthe pray,
Tyll it be domes day:”
So, after this array,—
Alake and well a way!—
We oure landes straye,
And other goodes decay;
Wherat ye laughe and play:
And natheles allwey
We dayly pay and pay,
To haue youe to go gaye
With wonderfull araye,
As Dysardes in a play.
God wolde it were imprented,
Written and indentyd,
What youe haue invented!
So great Diversyte
nowe in your garmentes be,
that wonder is to se;
Your triple cappe and crowne,
Curtle, cope, and gowne,
more worthe then halfe a towne,
With golde and perle sett,
And stones well I-ffrett;
Ther can be no bett;
And for no price ye lett,
how far of they be fett.
Oh ye kynde of vipers!
Ye beestly bellyters,
With Raynes and cipres,
That haue so many miters!
And yett ye be but mychers.
Youe weere littell hattes,
Myters, and square Capps,
Decked with flye flappes,
With many prety knackes,
like turkes of Tartary,
Moores, or Men of Moscovye,
Or lyke bugges of arraby,
With ouches and bosses,
With staves and crosses,
With pillers and posses,
With standers and banners,
Without good life or manners:
Then haue youe gay gloves,
That with your hand moves,
wroughte with true-loves,
And made well, for the nones,
with golde and precious stones:
Ye blisse vs with your bones,
And with your Riche ringes,
That Quenes and kinges,
At your offringes,
Shall kisse with knelinges;
Which your mynykyns
And mynyon babbes,
Your closse chambred drabbes,
When masse and all is done,
Shall were at after-none.
Your Curtells be of sylke,
with Rochetes white as mylke;
Your bootes of righte Sattyne,
Or velvett Crymosyne;
Your shoes wroughte with gold,
To tredd vpon the molde.
Wandring, as vandals,
In sylke and in sandals,
Ye kepe your holy rules,
As asses and mules;
for on your cloven cules
Will ye never sytt,
But on a Rich carpett;
And nowe and then a fitt,
after the Rule of Bennett,
with dythmunia vennett,
a gaye a vott gennett,
with gill or with Iennyt,
wyth Cycely or Sare;
yf thei Come wher they are,
thei Lay one, and not Spare,
And never look behind them,
wher soever they ffynd them;
ffor whan that thei be hett,
and asmodeus Grett,
they take, as thei can gett,
all fyshe that comes to Nett,
ffor Lust fyndes no lett
tyll hys poyson be spett;—
be she fyne or feat,
be she white or Iett,
Long or short sett,
do she Smyle or Skowle,
be she ffayr or fowle,
or owgly as an owle;
ffor vnderneth a Cowle,
a Surplyse or an amys,
Can no man do amys.
Ye halse them from harmes
With blessinges and charmes,
While the water warmes,
In your holy armes,
broging in ther barmes,
Devoutly to clipe it,
To Caste her with a tryppytt,
With, lusty Sir Iohn, whip it
Vnderneth your tippitt,
Pretextu pietatis,
Quam contaminatis
Sub iugo castitatis,
Your Burning heate to Cease,
and expell your disease,
Vnder pretens of pease,
The paynes to release
Of poore sely Sowles,
That hide be in holes
As hote as any Coles.
Ye cappes haue, and capes,
With many other iapes,
To cover with your pates;
As hoodes and cowles,
like horned owles,
With skapplers and Cootes,
Courtbies and Copes,
White knottyd ropes,
With other instrumentes,
Straunge habilimentes
And wanton vestementes,
and other Implementes,
As Tyrantes haue in tentes:
But what therby ment is,
Or what they signifye,
I cane not tell, not I;
nor youe vndowbtedlye
Can Shew no Reason whie.
Ye make it herisy
And treason to the kinge,
Yf we speke any thinge
That is not to your lykynge:
The truth may not be spoken,
But ye will be wroken.
Yett marke and note this token!
Yf gods worde ones open,
which wyll er long perdye,
Then shall we here and se
In cristianitye,
whether youe or we
The very traytours be.
But, by the trynite,
It wonder is to me
To se your charite
And hospitalite
So littell to the poore!
And yet vpon a hoore
Ye passe for non expence,
As thoughte it non offence
Were in the sighte of god!
Youe fray not of his rod;
Youe loue your bely Cod!
for them that haue no nede,
Ye dayly feest and fede:
I thinke it be to dreede
lest here youe haue your mede.
Ye drawe and cast lottes,
In hattes and in pottes,
for tottes and for quottes,
And blere vs with your blottes,
And with your mery poppes:
Thus youe make vs sottes,
And play with vs boopepe,
With other gambaldes like,
To pill oure lordes sheepe,
Your honour for to kepe,
Vsinge great excesse,
Which I pray god represse,
And soone to sende redresse!
for no man can expresse
The wo and wretchednesse
Youe on oure neckes do lye,
By your grett tyrannye,
Your pride and surquedrye,
That ye do openlye:
But that youe secretly
practyse pryvylye,
May not be tolde:—and why?
lest it be herysye!
and than by and by
to Make a faggott ffrye!
for we can not deny,—
and trewth doth playne dyscrye,
and all wysemen Espye—
that all the falt doth lye
Vpon oure owne foly,
That ye be so iolye;
for with oure owne goodes
We fether vppe oure hoodes.
Youe sanguinolenty,
Your mony is so plenty,
That youe make no deynty
Of Twenty pound and Twenty,
So youe may haue entry;
And then youe laughe and skorne
To se vs were the horne,
Ridinge here and hether,
Goinge ther and thether,
Lyke cokold foles to-gether,
In colde, wynde, and in wether,
for woll, for ledd, and lether;
and yet do not Consydre
we wer an Oxes fether:
This is a prety bob,
Oure hedes for to gnob
With suche a gentill Iob!
And we oure selves Rob
Of landes temporall,
And Ivelles great and smalle,
To give youe parte of all
In almes perpetuall,
To make our heyres thrall
ffor your hye promotyon,
through our blynde devotion
and Small Intellygens,
But that our Conscyens,
[Be] Laden with offens;
And youe vs so incense,
when we be going hens,
To make soch Recompens,
by gyvyng yowe our pens,
our Land, goodes, and Rentes,
ffor that holy pretens,
havyng ffull confydens
that be a Safe Defens:
So Do we styll Dyspens
with all Remorse and Sens
of harty penytens.
This cane not be denyed:
Your Iugglynge is espied,
Your mayster is vntyed,
which is the prince of pride;
for you on neyther syde
Can suffre or abyde
To here the troth tryed,
Which ye intend to hide
With vehement desyre,
As hote as any ffire.

II. [PART II.—AGAINST THE BISHOPS, THE POPE, AND CARDINALS: WITH A PROTEST AGAINST THE EXCOMMUNICATION OF ENGLAND IN KING JOHN'S TIME.]

Alake, for christes might,
These thinges go not a-righte!
Oure lanterns give no lighte;
All bisshopps be not brighte:
They be so full of Spyte,
They care not whom they byte;
both frend and foo they Smyte
Wyth Prison, deth, and flighte;
So dayly they do fyght
To overturne the Ryght:
So we be in the plyte,
that, losing of owre Sight,
we know not black from whyght,
And be thus blinded quyte,
We know not day from nyght.
But, by my Syres Soule,
The true Apostell paule
Wrott, as we may see
In tyte and Tymothe,
who should a bisshoppe be:
A man of holy liffe,
the husbonde of one wiffe;
That vseth not to strife,
Or strike with sworde or knyff,
Nor that at any tyme
Suspected is of cryme;
But wise and provident,
Colde and contynent,
But never vynolent;
that when he eat or drinke,
Slepe, awake, or winke,
Doth styll on measure thinke,
And therof vse a messe
To put a-way excesse,
kepe hyme lowe and chast,
That he make no wast
By Prodigalite
or Sensualytye,
A waster for to be;
But, after his degree,
with liberallite
kepe hospitallite.
he must be sadd and sage,
vsinge non outrage,
But soberly with reason
To spende in tyme and season,
And so to kepe his meason.
he may in no wise streke,
But suffer and be meke,
Shamefast and discrete,
Temperat, dulce, and swete,
Not speakinge angerly,
But soft and manerly;
And, in any wise,
Be ware of covetyse,
The rote of all ill vice.
he must be liberall,
And thanke oure lorde of all;
And, as a heerde his sheepe,
his childer must he kepe,
And all his family
In vertu edyfy,
Vnder disciplyne
Of holsome doctryne,
With dew subiection,
That non obiection
be made vnto his heste,
Of most or of leste;
for thus he doth conclude,
As by simylitude,
howe he that cane not skill
his housholde at his will
To governe, Rule, and teche,
Within his power and reach,
Oughte to haue no speache
Of Cure and diligence,
Of suche premynence
Within the churche of god.
And eke it is forbode
That he no novice be,
lest with superbite
he do presume to hye,
And consequently
ffall vnhappely
into the frenesy
Of pride and of Evyll,
Lyke Lucyfer, the Devyll;
for he playnly writes,
That of these neophites
And pevishe proselites,
Springe vpp ipocrites.
A bisshoppe eke must haue,
his honesty to save,
Of all men such a name,
That his outwarde fame
Be clene from any blame,
Impeched with no shame,
To draw all people in,
They may repent of synne,
And so he may them wynne,
That thei fall not vnware
into the devils snare.
Thus paule, as ye may se,
Taughte Tyte and tymothe,
Who should a bisshoppe be.
And christ, oure maister dere,
While he lyved here,
full poorly did appere,
Mekely borne and bredd;
The bare Earth was his bedd,
for where to hele his headd,
Or where to lye and rest,
he had no hole nor nest;
But in great poverty
he lyved soberly,
his worde to multyply;
And thus did Edifye
his churche that is so holy,
Suppressinge Synne and foly:
But not with friska ioly,
As somme do nowe a dayes,
That haue so many wayes
all maner gaynes to Reape,
Ther tresures one a heap
to gather and to kepe,
By pillinge of his shepe,
Not forsyng who do wepe,
And to his flocke repayre
As it were to a ffayre;
To sit in peters chayer
With pride and ambition,
sowyng great sedition;
And by superstition
Blinde vs with remission,
By bulles vnder led,
To serve both quicke and ded;
And by that way pretend
To clyme vpp and ascend
That lucifer did discend.
I thinke that suche frykars
Be not christes vickars,
But crafty intrycars
and pryvy purse pykars;
for they that be sekars
of stores newe and olde,
May perceyve and beholde
howe euery thinge is solde
for Sylver and for golde:
The craft can not be told,
what is and hath bene done
by antychryst of Rome;
for thens the sourdes springe
of euery naughty thinge,
hide vnder-neth the whynge
Of the Sire of Synne;
At whom I will begynn
Somwhat for to speake,
And playnly to intreate
Of this farly freake,
That sitteth in his seat,
Devouringe synne as meatte,
Whiche he and his do Eate
as they may catch and geate:
They spare not to devower
Cyty, towne, and Tower,
Wherat no man may lower;
for be it swete or sower,
Or be it good or yll,
We must be muett still,
the lustes to fulfill
of that cocodryll,
which at his only will
May ech man save or spyll.
This wicked man of warr
So hault is, that he darr
(as he lyste) make and marr,
his owne lawe to prefarr
Aboue the worde of god!
it passeth godes forbod
That ever it should be;
A man to clyme so hy,
By Reason of his see,
To clayme Auctoritye
Aboue the deyte!
it is to hy a bost,
And Synne one of the most
Ageynst the holy gost,
That is not remissable.
for as for the bible,
he taketh it for a ridle,
Or as a lawles lible,
which, to the hy offence
of his Conscience,
he dare therwith dispence,
And alter the sentence.
for wher god do[th] prohibitt,
he doth leve exhibite,
and at his Lust Inhybyte;
And wher god doth Commaunde,
ther he doth Countermaunde;
After his owne purpose
The text to turne and glose,
like a welshe manes hose,
or lyk a waxen nose.
But wyse men do suppose
That truth shall Iudge and trye,
for lyars can but lye.
He is so hault and taunt,
That he dare hyme avaunt
All Erthly men to daunt;
And faynes to give and graunt,
In heaven above, or hell,
A Place wherin to dwell,
As all his lyars tell,
Which he doth dayly sell,
After his devise,
if men come to his prise.
it is his marchaundyse;
for, as ye will demaunde,
he can and may Commaunde
A Thowsande, in A bande,
Of Angells out of heaven,
To come throughe the leven,
And make all thinge even,
his biddinges to obey,
which beares the greatist swaye,
Your soules to Convey
frome all decaye
Out of the fendes wey;
But, provided alwey,
That ye first mony paye;
at the appoynted daye
ye present it, if ye maye;
then, vnder thi petycion,
thou gettest true remyssion,
From synnes the absolucion,
By this his owne Commyssion,
By bryve or els by bull:
To fill his Coffers full,
Ye may Aske what ye wull.
Alas, ye be to dull
To se this lorde of losse,
The fo of christes crosse,
This hoore of babilon
And seede of Zabulon,
The Enemy of christ,
The devels holy pryst
And very antechrist,
To revell and to ride,
like the prince of pride,
That of euery syde
Warres the worlde wyde,
Whom no streng[t]he may abide—
The devill be his guyde!
for loke in his decrees,
And ye shall finde out lyes,
As thik as swarme of byes,
That throughe the worlde flyes,
making parsemonyes
Of peters patrimonyes,
But great mercymonyes
Of his seremonyes,
To smodder vs with smoke:
for, when he wilbe wroke,
No man may bere his stroke;
So hevy is his yoke,
To christes full vnlike,
That saide ‘his yoke is swete,
his burthen lighte and meete
for all men that be meke,
To suffer and to bere
Without drede or fere:’
But popes after-warde,
That never had Regard
Which ende shoulde go forewarde,
haue drawen vs bakwarde,
And made the yoke so harde
By false invented lawes,—
As thoughe lay men were dawes,
And dome as any stone,—
With sivile and Canon
To serve god and mammon;
Righte and wronge is one.
Serche his decretalles
And bulles papalles,
Et, inter alia,
loke in his palia
And Bacchanallia,
With his extravagantes
And wayes vagarantes:
his lawes arrogantes
Be made by truwantes,
That frame his finctions
Into Distinctions
With cloutes of clawses,
Questyons and Cawses,
With Sext and Clementyn,
And lawes legantyne:
his County pallantyne
haue coustome colubryne,
With Codes viperyne
And sectes serpentyne:
Blinde be his stores
Of interogatores
and declaratores,
With lapse and relapse,
A wispe and a waspe,
A clispe and a claspe,
And his after clappes.
for his paragraffes
Be no Cosmograffes,
But vnhappy graffes
That wander in the warrayne,
fruteles and barayne,
To fede that foule Carrayne
And dignite papall;
with Iudges that scrape all,
And doctours that take all,
by lawes absynthyall
And labirynthyall.
his Tabellions
Be rebellions;
his laweres and scribes
Live only by bribes;
His holy advocates
And Iudges diligates
Haue robbed all estates,
By many inventions
Of sundry suspentions,
Subtile subventions,
Crafty conventions,
Prevy preventions,
And evell exemptions;
So hath his indictions
And his interdictions,
With croked Commyssions,
Colde Compromyssions,
Cursed Conditions,
hevy traditions,
Elvishe Inibitions,
And redy remissions.
Then hathe he inductions
And colde Conductions;
his expectatyves
Many a man vnthrives.
By his Constitutions
And his sub[s]titutions
He maketh institutions,
And taketh restitutions,
Sellinge absolutions,
And other like pollutions:
His holy Actions
Be Satisfactions
Of false Compactions:
He Robbeth all nations
With his fulminations,
And other like vexations;
As with abiurations,
Excomunycations,
Aggravations,
Presentations,
Sequestrations,
Deprivations,
Advocations,
resignations,
Dilapidations,
Sustentations,
Adminystrations,
Approbations,
Assignations,
Alterations,
Narrations,
Declarations,
Locations,
Collocations,
Revocations,
Dispensations,
Intimations,
legittimations,
Insinuations,
Pronunttiations,
Demonstrations,
Vacations,
Convocations,
Deputations,
Donations,
Condonations,
Commynations,
excusations,
Declamations,
visitations,
Acceptations,
Arrendations,
Publications,
Renunttiations,
fatigations,
false fundations,
And dissimulations,
With like Abbominations
Of A thowsand fasshions.
His holy vnions
Be no Communyons;
His trialitees
and pluralytyes
Be full of Qualitees;
His tottes and quottes
Be full of blottes.
With quibes and quaryes
Of inventataries,
Of Testamentaries,
And of mortuaries,
By sutes of appeales,
And by his ofte repeales,
He oure mony steales.
I speake not of his sessions,
nor of his confessions
Olde and avricular,
Colde and caniculer;
Howe the Cubiculer,
In the Capitular,
With his pylde spitler,
playde the knavyculer
Vnderneth a wall:
I may not tell youe all,
In termes speciall,
Of pardon nor of pall,
Nor of confessionall;
for I feare, yf he call
the sentence generall,
I mighte so take a fall,
And haue his bitter curse,
And yett be not the wurse,
Save only in my purse,
Because I shoulde be fayne
To By my state agayne
ex leno vell ex lena,
aut pellice obscena,
Res certe inamena:
Papisticorum scena,
Malorum semper plena;
for all the worlde rounde
he falsely doth confounde,
By lawes made and founde
by thyr devyse vnsownde,
With no steadfast grounde,
But with fayned visions
And develyshe devisions,
With basterde religions:
Thus this cursed elfe,
To avaunce his pelfe,
falsely fayne[s] hymeself
To be semideus.
No, youe asmeodeus!
Ye are amoreus,
The Sonne of chanaan!
O thou monstrous man,
And childe of cursed chan!
Arte thou halfe god, halfe man?
Gup, leviathan,
And Sonne of Sattan,
The worme letaphagus,
And Sire to Symonde magus!
O porter Cerberus,
Thou arte so monstrous,
Soo made and myschevous,
Proude and surquedrous,
And as lecherous
As heliogabalus
Or Sardanapalus!
Hatefull vnto god,
And father of all falsehoode,
The poyson of prestoode,
And deth of good knighthoode,
The Robber of riche men,
And murderer of meke men,
The turment of true men
That named be newe men,
The prince of periury,
And christes Enemy!
vnhappy as achab,
and naughty as nadab,
As crafty as Caball,
And dronken as naball,
The hope of Ismaell,
And false Achitofell,
The blissinge of bell,
And advocate of hell;
Thou hunter nembroth,
And Iudas Iscarioth,
Thou bloody belyall,
And Sacrifise of B[a]all,
Thou elvishe ipocrite,
And naughty neophite,
Thou pevishe proselite,
And Synefull Sodymite,
Thou gredy Gomorrite,
And galefull Gabaonite,
Tho[u] hermofrodite,
Thou arte a wicked sprite,
A naughty seismatike,
And an heritike,
A Beestely Bogorian,
And devill meridian,
The patrone of proctors,
And dethe of trewe doctours,
The founder of faytors,
And trust of all traytours,
The shender of sawes,
And breaker of lawes,
The Syre of serdoners,
And prince of pardoners,
The kinge of questors,
And rule of regestors,
The Eater of frogges,
And maker of goddes,
The brother of brothells,
And lorde of all losells,
The sturrur of stoores,
And keper of hoores
With gloriouse gawdes,
Amonge trusty bawdes,
The father of foles,
And ignoraunce of scoles,
The helper of harlettes,
And Captayne of verlettes,
The Cloke of all vnthriftes,
And Captayne of all Caytifes,
The leader of truwantes,
And chefe of all Tyrauntes,
As hinde as an hogge,
And kinde as any dogge,
The shipwrake of noye:
christ saue the and Saincte loy!
Arte thou the hiest pryst,
And vicar vnto christ?
No, no, I say, thou lyest!
Thou arte a cursed crekar,
A crafty vpp-crepar!
Thou arte the devils vicar!
A privye purse pikar,
By lawes and by rites,
for sowles and for sprites:
O lorde of Ipocrites,
Nowe shut vpp your wickettes,
And clape to your clickettes!
A! farewell, kinge of crekettes!
for nowe the tyme falles
To speake of Cardinalles,
that kepe ther holy halles
With Towres and walles.
Be they not Carnalles,
and lordes infernalles?
Yea, gredy Carmalles,
as any Carmarante;
With ther Coppentante
They loke adutante.
for soth, men say they be
full of iniquite,
lyvinge in habundance
of all worldly substance,
wherin they lodge and ly,
And wallowe beasteally,
As hogges do in a Stye,
Servinge ther god, ther belly,
with chuettes and with gelly,
with venyson and with tartes,
with confyctes and with fartes,
To ease ther holy hartes.
They take ther stations,
And make dyambulations
Into all nations,
for ther visitations,
Callinge convocations,
Sellinge dispensations,
Givinge condonasions,
Makinge permutations,
And of excomunycations
Sell they relaxacions;
for they, in ther progresse,
with katern, mawde, and besse,
will vse full great excesse,
withowt any redresse;
and all men they oppresse
In Syty, Towne, and village;
ffrom olde and yong of age
they robbe and make pyllage,
thyr lusts for to aswage,
which they extorte by mighte
As in the churches righte;
They may not lese a fether:
But god, that lyveth ever,
Graunt that they never
haue power to Come hether!
for wher they ones arive,
so cleane they do vs shryve,
thath I swere by my life,
The Contry ther shall thrive
Yeres tenn and ffive
After them the worse:
Men give them godes curse
To shute within ther purse;
Both lernyd and lewde
wolde they were beshrewed;
They never mighte come nere
for to visitt here,
Altho they haue sotch chere
As they cann well desyre,
And as they will requier;
for why, it doth appere,
the hartes ar sett on fyer
of chanon, mvnke, and fryer,
that daylye dothe aspyre,
By bulles vnder ledd,
how they should be fledd.
It is therfore great skill
that every Iacke and gyll
performe the popes will,
hys purse and panch to ffill;
for, as I Erst haue tolde,
there lyves not suche a scolde
that dare ons be so bold,
from shorne ne yet from polde,
Nor monye, meate, nor golde,
from soch men to withholde,
Ther favour boughte and solde,
That take a thowsand ffolde
More then that Iudas did.
The trouth can not be hid,
for it is playnly kid:
Iudas for his dispense
Sold christ for thirty pense,
And did a foule offence,
his lorde god so to tray;
And they in likewise say,
After Iudas way,
What will ye give and pay
(As the matter falles,)
for pardonnes and for palles,
And for confessionalles?
We may have absolucions
without Restytutyons,
And at oure owne election
passe without correction,
Besydes christes passion
To make satisfaction.
We feare for non offence,
So they haue recompence:
By great Audacitees
They graunt Capacitees;
For heaven and for hell
They mony take and tell:
So thus they by and sell,
And take therof no shame,
But laughe and haue good game,
To all oure soul[e]s bane.
God helpe we be to blame
Sutch lordes to defame!
Yett, by the Common fame,
Some bisshops vse the same,
In christes holy name
Soules to sell and bye:
my mynde is not to lye,
But to write playnlye
Ageynst ipocresye
In bisshopp or in other,
Yea, thoughe it were my brother,
my father or my mother,
my Syster or my Sonne;
for, as I haue begonne,
I will, as I haue donne,
Disclose the great outrage
That is in this Image;
for he that feles the pricke,
and theron groweth sycke,
May with the gald horse kike;
for, as I erst haue said,
oure bisshops at a brayd
ar growne so sore afrayde,
And In the world so wide
do vse sutch pompe and pride,
and rule on euery syde,
That none may them abide:
Of no prince, lord, nor duke,
They take will a rebuke;
All lay men they Surmount,
Makinge non accompte,
Nor cast no Reckonynge
Scarcely of a kinge:
This is a wonder thinge;
They stande so suer and fast,
And be nothinge agast;
for that blody Iudge
And mighty Sanguisuge,
The pope that is so huge,
Is ever ther refuge;
So be the Cardinalles
Ther suer defence and walles,
With whom they stifly stande
By water and by lande,
To gett the over hande
of all the world rounde,
Wher profitt may be founde:
They be so many legions,
That they oppresse regions
with boke, bell, and candell,
Any kinge to handell,
As they haue many one:
for triall here vpon
I take of good kinge Iohn,
Whom by the bitinge
Of ther subtill smytinge,
ffirst by acytinge,
And after interditinge,
By fulmynations
Of excommunications;
for by ther holy poores
They stored vpp stoores,
and kepte suche stvrre with hores,
And shut vpp all churche doores
for ther princely pleasure,
(they lyve so owt of measure,)
Till they might haue leasure,
Ther lieg lorde and kinge
So base and lowe to bringe—
which was a pyttevs thyng—
That he with wepinge yees,
Bowinge backe and thies,
And knelinge on his knees,
must render vpp his fees,
With kingly dignytees,
Septer, crowne, and landes,
Into ther holy handes.
Alas! howe mighte it be
That oure nobilitee
Could then no better se?
for theyrs was the fault
oure Prelates were so haulte;
Their strength then was to seke;
Ther liege lorde to kepe,
They durst not fight ne strike;
They feared of a gleke,
That, no day in the weke,
for any good or Cattell,
Durst they go to battell,
Nor entre churche ne chappell
In syxe or seven yere,
Before christ to appere,
And devine seruice here
In Any hallowed place,
for lacke of ther good grace;
Ther was no tyme nor space
To do to god seruice,
But as they wolde devise;
Their lawes be so sinystre,
That no man durst minystre
The holy Sacrementes
Till they hadd ther intentes
Of landes and of rentes,
By lawes and by lyes;
To inriche ther sees,
The blind men Eat vpp flees;
for by ther constitutions
They toke restitutions
Of cyties and of castells,
Of Townes and bastells,
And make ther prince pike wastells,
Till they rang out the belles,
And did as they wold Elles,
like traytours and rebelles,
As the story telles.
But Iesu christ hyme self,
nor his appostells twelffe,
vnto that cvrsyd elfe
did never teach hym so
In any wise to do;
for lucre or advayle,
ageynst thyr kyng to rayle,
and lieg lorde to assayle,
Within his owne lande
To put hym vnder bande,
And take brede of his hande:
The lorde saue sutch a flock,
That so could mowe and mock
To make ther kinge a block,
And eke ther laughinge stocke!
They blered hym with a lurche,
And said that he must wurche
By counsell of the churche;
Wherby they ment nothinge
But to wrest and wringe,
Only for to bringe
Ther liege lorde and kinge
To be ther vnderlinge.
Alas! who euer sawe
A kinge vnder awe,
Ageynst all gods lawe,
All righte and consience,
for doinge non offence
To make sutch recompence?
They gave ther lorde a laske,
To purge withall his caske,
And putt hym to no taske,
But as they wold hyme aske:
This was a midday maske,
A kinge so to enforce
With pacyence perforce.
Take hede therfore, and watche,
All ye that knowe this tatche,
Ye make not sutch a matche.
loke forth! beware the katche!
Ye fall not in the snatche
of that vngratiovs pacthe,
before the rope hym racthe,
or tyburne dothe hym strache.
but who so preache or prate,
I warne youe, rathe and late
To loke vpp and awake,
That ye do never make
Your maister nor your mate
to sytt withowt your gate.
Take hede, for christes sake,
And knowe your owne estate,
Or ye be tardy take;
yea, lest it be to late
To trust on hadd-I-wist
I-masked in a myst,—
As good to ly bypist:
for these hie primates,
Bysshops and prelates,
And pope-holy legates,
with ther pilde pates,
Dare conquer all estates:
They do but as they will;
for, be it good or ill,
We must be muett still:
Why lay men can not se,
It is the more pite!

III. [PART III.—AGAINST THE PREACHERS AND THEIR DEFENDERS (SIR THOMAS MORE, THE MAID OF KENT, ETC.)]

Of prechers nowe adayes
be many fariseyes,
That leue the lordes layes,
And preche ther owne wayes;
Wherof nowe of late
Hathe risen great debate;
for some champe and chaffe
As hogges do in draffe,
And some cry out a-pase
As houndes at a chase,
Whiche for lacke of grace
The playne truthe wold defase,
So busely they barke.
An other in the darke,
That is a busarde starke,
And cane not se the marke,
Wondereth at this warke,
And therfore taketh carke
By-cause he is no clarke.
Some be soft and still
As clappes in a mill;
And some cry and yell
As sprites do in hell;
Some be here and ther,
And some I wote not wher;
Some holde vpp yea and nay,
And some forsake ther lay;
Some be still and stey,
And hope to haue a daye;
Some wote not what to say,
But dout whether they may
Abide or rune away;
Ther wittes be so weake,
They say they dare not speake,
They be afrayd of heate.
Some be sycke and sadd,
for sorrowe almost madd;
I tell youe veryly,
Ther wittes be awry,
They peyne them selves greatly
To haue the trouth go by;
Some on bokes dayly prye,
And yett perceyve not reason whie;
Tho some affirme, some do deny,
With nowe a trouth and then a ly,
To say one thinge openly,
And an other prively:
“Here be but youe and I;
Say to me your mynd playnlye,
Is it not open heresy?”
Thus say they secretly,
Whisperinge with sorrowe
That they deny to morowe.
Ther tales be so dobble,
That many be in trobble,
And doubt which way to take,
Them selves sure to make.
A, lorde! it makes me shake,
for pyty that I quake!
They be so colde and horse,
That they haue no forse,
So they be prefarred,
Tho all the rest were marred.
Thus the people smatter,
That dayly talke and clatter,
oure preachers do but flatter,
To make them selves the fatter,
And care not thoughe the matter
Were clerely layde a watter.
Douse men chatt and chide it,
for they may not abid it;
The thomistes wold hide it,
for littera occidit.
Thus these sysmatickes,
And lowsy lunatickes,
With spurres and prickes
Call true men heretickes.
They finger ther fidles,
And cry in quinibles,
“Away these bibles,
for they be but ridles!
And give hem robyn whode,
To red howe he stode
In mery grene wode,
when he gathered good
Before noyes ffloode!”
for the Testamentes
To them, they sey, sente is,
To gather vpp ther rentes,
After ther intentes:
Wherby it by them ment is,
That lay men be but lowtes;
They may not knowe the Clowtes,
Nor dispute of the doubtes
That is in Christes lawe.
for why, they never sawe
The bagg nor the bottell
Of oure Arrestotle,
nor knowe not the toyes
Of Doctore averroyes;
It is no play for boyes,
Neyther for lay men;
But only for schole men,
for they be witty men,
As wise as any wrenne,
And holy as an henne.
for doctoure bullatus,
though parum literatus,
Will brable and prate thus;
howe Doctoure pomaunder,
As wise as a gander,
wotes not wher to wander,
whether to meander,
or vnto menander;
For of Alexander,
Irrefragable hales,
he cane tell many tales,
of many parke pales,
Of Butgettes and of males,
Of Candy and of Cales,
And of west wales.
But doctoure dorbellous
Doth openly tell vs
howe they by and sell vs:
And doctoure Sym Sotus
Cann goostely grope vs;
for he hathe rad Scotus,
And so the dawe dotus
Of doctour Subtyles;
Yea, three hundreth myles,
With sutch Crafty wyles
he many men begiles,
That never knewe an vnce
At full of master Dunce.
Then doctoure Bonbardus
Can skill of lombardus;
he wonnes at malepardus,
With father festino,
And Doctoure attamino,
Dudum de Camino,
With ther consobrino,
Capite equino
Et Corde asinino;
hij latent in limo
Et in profundo fimo,
Cubantes in Culino
Cum Thoma de aquino,
Tractantes in ima
De pelle Canina
Et lana Caprina.
Then doctoure chekmate
hath his pardoned pate,
A man yll educate;
his harte is indurate,
his heade eke edentate;
his wittes be obfuscate,
his braynes obumbrate,
Oure questions to debate;
for thoughe cam but late,
his cause is explicate
with termes intricate,
I note wherof conflate;
And therfore must he make
his bull and Antedate.
Then doctour tom-to-bold
Is neyther whote nor colde,
Till his Coles be solde;
his name may not be tolde
for syluer nor for golde;
But he is sutch a scolde,
That no play may hym holde
(for anger vnbepyst,)
Yf his name were wist;
Ye may Iudge as ye liste;
he is no acquiniste,
Nor non occanist,
But a mockaniste;
This man may not be myste,
he is a suer sophiste,
And an olde papist.
But nowe we haue a knighte
That is a man of mighte,
All armed for to fighte,
To put the trouthe to flighte
By bowbell pollecy,
With his poetry
And his sophestry;
To mocke and make a ly,
With quod he and quod I;
And his appologye
Made for the prelacy,
Ther hugy pompe and pride
To coloure and to hide;
he maketh no nobbes,
But with his diologges
To prove oure prelates goddes,
And lay men very lobbes,
Betinge they[m] with bobbes,
And with ther ow[n]e roddes;
Thus he taketh payne
To fable and to fayne,
Ther myscheff to mayntayne,
And to haue them rayne
Over hill and playne,
Yea, over heaven and hell,
And wher as sprites dwell,
In purgatorye holles,
with whote ffier and Coles,
To singe for sely soules,
With a supplication,
And a confutation,
Without replication,
havinge delectation
To make exclamation,
By way of Declamation,
In his debellation,
With a popishe fasshion
To subvert oure nation:
But this daucok doctoure
And purgatory proctoure
Waketh nowe for wages,
And, as a man that rages
Or over come with ages,
Disputith per ambages,
To helpe these parasites
And naughty ipocrites,
With legendes of lyes,
fayned fantasies,
And very vanyties,
Called veryties,
vnwritten and vnknowen,
But as they be blowne
from lyer to lyer,
Inventyd by a ffryer
In magna Copia,
Brought out of vtopia
vnto the mayde of kent,
nowe from the devill sent,
A virgyne ffayre and gent,
That hath our yees blent:
Alas, we be myswent!
for yf the false intent
were knowen of this witche,
It passeth dogg and bitche:
I pray god, do so mutche
To fret her on the itche,
And open her in tyme!
for this manly myne
Is a darke devyne,
With his poetry,
And her iugglery,
By conspiracy
To helpe our prelacy,
She by ypocresye,
And he by Tyranny,
That causeth cruelly
The simple men to dye
for fayned herisye:
he saythe that this nody
Shall brenne, soule and body,
Or singe his palanody
With feare till he pant,
To make hym recreante,
his sayinges to recante,
So as he shalbe skante
Able for to loke
In writinge or in booke,
That treatithe of the rote
Or of the base and fote
of ther abhomynation:
he vsethe sutche a fasshion,
To send a man in station
With an evill passion
To his egression,
Before the procession
Slylye for to stalke,
And solempeny to walke,
To here the preacher talke,
howe he hath made a balke;
And so the innocent,
for feare to be brent,
Must suffer checke and checke,
his faccott on his necke,
Not for his life to quecke,
But stande vpp, like a bosse,
In sighte at paules crosse,
To the vtter losse
Of his goode name and fame:
Thus with great payne and shame
he kepethe men in bandes,
Confiskinge goods and landes,
And then to hete ther handes
With faccottes and with brandes,
Or make them be abjure.
These thinges be in vre:
Youe leade vs with the lure
Of your persecution
And cruell execution,
That the fyry fume
Oure lyves shall consume
By three, by two, and one:
Men say ye will spare none
Of hye nor lowe degre,
That will be eneme
To your ipocrese,
Or to your god, the bele.
for who dare speake so felle
That clerkes should be simple,
Without spott or wrinkell?
Yett nathelesse alwey
I do protest and saye,
And shall do while I may,
I never will deny,
But confesse openly,
That punnysshement should be,
In every degre,
Done with equite.
when any doth offende,
Then oughte youe to attende
To cause hyme to amend,
A-waytinge tyme and place,
As god may give youe grace,
To haue hyme fase to fase,
his fautes to deface,
With hope to reconcyle hyme;
But not for to begile hym,
Or vtterly to revile hyme,
As thoughe ye wold excile hyme;
for then, the trouth to tell,
Men thinke ye do not well.
Ye call that poore man wretch,
As thoughe ye hadd no retche,
Or havinge no regarde
whiche ende should go forwarde:
ye be so sterne and harde,
ye rather drawe backwarde,
Your brother so to blinde,
To grope and sertche his mynde,
As thoughe youe were his frinde,
Some worde to pike and finde,
wherby ye may hyme blinde;
with your popishe lawe
To kepe vs vnder awe,
By captious storyes
Of Interrogatoryes:
Thus do ye full vnkindly,
To feyne your selves frindley,
And be nothinge but fyndly.
I tell youe, men be lothe
To se youe wode and wrothe,
And then for to be bothe
Th'Accuser and the Iudge!
Then farewell all refuge,
And welcom sanguisuge!
when ye be madd and angry,
And an expresse enemy,
it is ageynst all equitye
Ye shoulde be Iudge and partye!
Therfore the kinges grace
Your lawes muste deface;
for before his face
Youe should your playntes bringe,
As to your lorde and kinge
And Iudge in euery thinge,
That, by godes worde,
hathe power of the sworde,
As kinge and only lorde,
So scripture doth recorde;
for her[e] within his lande
should be no counterband;
But holy at his hande
we shoulde all be, and stande,
Both clerkes spirituall,
And lay men temporall.
But youe make lawe at will,
The poore to plucke and pill;
And some that do no yll,
Your appetites to ffill,
Ye do distroy and kill.
Lett godes worde try them,
And then ye shall not frye them;
yea, lett the worde of god
Be euery mannes rode!
And the kinges the lawe
To kepe them vnder awe,
To fray the rest with terroure,
They may revoke ther erroure!
And thus, I say agayne,
The people wolde be fayne
Ye prelates wolde take payne
To preache the gospell playne;
for otherwise certayne
Your laboure is in vayne;
for all your crueltye,
I knowe that you and we
Shall never well agree:
Ye may in no wise se
Sutch as disposed be
of ther charitye
To preach the verytye;
Ye stope them with decrees,
And with your veritees
vn-written, as ye saye;
Thus ye make them stay:
But god, that all do may,
I do desire and pray,
To open vs the day,
which is the very kaye
of knowledge of his way,
That ye haue stolen awaye!
And then, my lordes, perfay,
for all your popishe play,
not all your gold so gay,
nor all your riche araye,
shall serve youe to delaye
But some shall go astraye,
And lerne to swyme or sinke;
for truly I do thinke,
ye may well wake or wynke,
for any meat or drinke
ye geitt, without ye swynke.
But that wold make youe wrothe;
for, I trowe, ye be lothe
To do eyther of both,
That is, your-self to cloth
with laboure and with sweate
And faste till youe Eate
But that youe Erne and geate;
like verlettes and pages,
To leve your parsonages,
your denns and your cages,
And [live] by dayly wages:
God blesse vs, and Sainct blase!
This were a hevy case,
A chaunce of ambesase,
To se youe broughte so base,
To playe without a place.
now god send better grace!
And loke ye lerne a-pase
To tripe in trouthes trace,
And seke some better chaunce
your selves to avaunce,
With sise synke or synnes;
for he laughe[s] that wynnes,
As ye haue hetherto,
And may hereafter do.
yf ye the gospell preche,
As christ hym-self did teche,
And in non other wise
But after his devise,
ye may with good advyse
kepe your benefise
And all your dignite,
without malignite,
In christes name, for me;
I gladely shall agre
It ever may so be.
But this I say and shall,
what happ so euer fall,
I pray and call
The kinge celestiall,
Ones to give youe grace
To se his worde haue place;
And then within shorte space
we shall perceyve and se
howe euery degre
hath his Auctorite
By the lawe of christ,
The lay man and the prest,
The poore man and the lorde;
for of that monocorde
The scripture doth recorde;
And then with good accorde,
In love and in concorde
We shall together holde;
or elles ye may be bolde,
for heate or colde,
Say ye what ye will,
Yt were as good be still;
for thoughe ye glose and frase
Till your Eyes dase,
Men holde it but a mase
Till godes worde haue place,
That doth include more grace
Then all Erthly men
Could ever knowe or ken.

IV. [PART IV.—AGAINST ALL THE MANY ORDERS OF THE POPISH CLERGY, MONKS, AND FRIARS.]

Nowe with sondry sectes
The world sore infectes,
As in christes dayes
Amonge the pharisees,
In clothinge and in names;
for some were Rhodyans,
And Samaritans,
Some were publicanes,
Some were nazarenes,
Bisshops and essenes,
preestes and pharisees,
And so of Saducees,
prophetes and preachers,
Doctours and teachers,
Tribunes and tribes,
lawers and scribes,
Deacons and levytes,
with many ipocrites.
And so be nowe also,
with twenty tymes mo
Then were in christes dayes
Amonge the pharisees:
The pope, whom first they call
Ther lorde and principall,
The patriarke withall;
And then the Cardinall
with tytles all of pride,
As legates of the side,
And some be cutt and shorne
That they be legates borne.
Then Archebisshops bold,
And bisshops for the folde,
They metropolitannes,
And these diocysanyes,
That haue ther suffraganyes
To blesse the prophanyes.
Then be ther curtisanes
As ill as arrianes
Or domicianes,
Riall residentes,
And prudent presidentes;
So be their sensors,
Doughty dispensors,
Crafty inventors,
And prevy precentors,
With chaplaynes of honour
That kepe the popes bower.
Then allmoners and deanes,
That geit by ther meanes
The rule of all reames;
Yett be ther subdeanes,
With treasorers of trust,
And chauncelours iniust,
To scoure of scab and rust,
With vicars generalls,
And ther officialles,
Chanons and chaunters,
Thait be great avaunters;
So be ther subchaunters,
Sextons and Archedeakons,
Deakons and subdeakons,
That be ypodeakons,
parsonnes and vicars,
Surveyors and sikers,
Prevy purse-pikers,
Provostes and preachers,
Readers and teachers,
With bachilers and maysters,
spenders and wasters.
So be ther proctors,
with many dull doctors,
Proude prebendaryes,
Colde Commissaries,
Synfull secundaries,
Sturdy stipendaries,
With olde ordinaryes,
And penytencyaryes,
That kepe the Sanctuaries.
So be ther notaries,
And prothonotaries,
lawers and scribes,
with many quibibes,
Redy regesters,
pardoners and questers,
Maskers and mummers,
Deanes and sumners,
Apparatoryes preste
To Ride Est and weste.
Then be ther advocates,
And parum litterates,
That Eate vpp all Estates,
with wyly visitors,
And crafty inquisitors,
Worse then mamalokes,
That catche vs with ther crokes,
And Brenne vs and oure bokes.
Then be ther annivolors,
And smalle benivolers,
with chauntry chapleynes,
Oure ladyes chamberleynes;
And Some be Iesu christes,
As be oure Servinge pristes,
And prestes that haue cure,
which haue ther lyvinge sure;
with clerkes and Queresters,
And other smale mynisters,
As Reders and singers,
Bedemen and bell-ringers,
That laboure with ther lippes
Ther pittaunce out of pittes,
with bennet and collet,
That bere bagg and wallett:
These wretches be full wely,
They Eate and drinke frely,
withe salue, stella cely,
And ther de profundis;
They lye with immundis,
And walke with vacabundis,
At good ale and at wynne
As dronke as any swynne.
Then be ther grosse abbottes,
That observe ther sabbottes,
fayer, ffatt, and ffull,
As gredy as a gull,
And ranke as any bull,
with priors of like place,
Some black and Some white,
As channons be and monkes,
Great lobyes and lompes,
with bonhomes and brothers,
fathers and mothers,
Systers and nonnes,
And littell prety bonnes,
With lictors and lectors,
Mynisters and rectors,
Custos and correctors,
with papall collectors,
And popishe predagoges,
Mockinge mystagoges,
In straunge array and robes,
Within ther sinagoges;
With sectes many mo,
An hundreth in a throo
I thinke to name by roo,
As they Come to my mynde,
whom, thoughe they be vnkind,
The lay mens labor finde.
for some be benedictes,
with many maledictes;
Some be cluny,
And Some be plumy,
with cistercyences,
Grandimontences,
Camaldulences,
premonstratences,
Theutonycences,
Clarrivallences,
And basiliences;
Some be paulines,
Some be antonynes,
Some be bernardines,
Some be Celestines,
Some be flamynes,
Some be fuligines,
Some be columbines,
Some be Gilbertines,
Some be Disciplines,
Some be clarines,
And many Augustines;
Some clarissites,
Some be accolites,
Some be sklaveinytes,
Some be nycolites,
Some be heremytes,
Some be lazarites,
Some be ninivites,
Some be Iohannytes,
Some be Iosephites,
Some be Iesuytes,
Servi and servytes,
And Sondry Iacobites;
Then be ther helenytes,
hierosolymites,
Magdalynites,
hieronimytes,
Anacorites,
And Scenobites.
So be ther sophrans,
Constantinopolitanes,
holy hungarians,
Purgatorians,
Chalomerians,
And ambrosians;
Then be ther indianes,
And escocyanes,
lucifrans,
chartusyanes,
collectanes,
Capusianes,
hispanians,
honofrianes,
Gregorianes,
vnprosianes,
winceslanes,
with ruffianes,
And with rhodianes.
Some be templers,
And exemplers,
Some be spitlers,
And Some be vitlers,
Some be scapelers,
And Some cubiculers,
Some be tercyaris,
And Some be of St. marys,
Some be hostiaris,
And of St. Iohns frarys,
Some be stellifers,
And Some be ensefers,
Some lucifers,
And Some be crucyfers,
Some haue signe of sheres,
And Some were shurtes of heres.
Some be of the spone,
And Some be crossed to rome;
Some daunce and daly
In sophathes valley,
And in the blak alley
Wheras it ever darke is,
And Some be of St. markis
Mo then be good clarkes.
Some be mysiricordes,
Mighty men and lordes,
And Some of godes house
That kepe the poore souse,
Minimi and mymes,
And other blak devines,
with virgins and vestalles,
monkes and monyalles,
that be conventualles
like frogges and todes.
And Some be of the rhodes,
Sworde-men and knightes,
That for the [faith] fightes
With sise, sinke, and quatter.
But nowe never the latter
I intend to clatter
Of a mangye matter,
That smelles of the smatter,
Openly to tell
what they do in hell,
Whereas oure ffryers dwell,
everich in his sell,
The phane and the prophane,
The croked and the lame,
The mad, the wild, and tame,
every one by name.
The formest of them all
Is ther generall;
And the next they call
Ther hie provincyall,
With Costos and wardyn
That lye next the Gardeyn;
Then oure father prior,
with his subprior
That with the Covent Comes
To gather vpp the Cromes;
Then oure fryer douche
Goeth by a crouche,
And slouthfull ffryer slouche
That bereth Iudas pouche;
Then ffryer domynike
And ffryer demonyke,
ffryer Cordiler
And ffryer bordiler,
ffryer Iacobine,
ffryer Augustyne,
And ffryer incubyne,
and ffryer Succubine,
ffryer carmelyte
And ffryer hermelite,
ffryer mynorite
and ffryer ipocrite,
ffrier ffranciscane
And ffrier damiane,
ffrier precher
And ffrier lecher,
ffrier crusifer
And ffrier lusifer,
ffrier purcifer
And ffrier furcifer,
ffrier ferdifer
And ffrier merdifer,
ffryer sacheler
And ffryer bacheler,
ffryer cloysterer
And ffrier floysterer,
ffrier pallax
And ffrier fallax,
ffrier fugax
And ffrier nugax,
ffrier rapax
And ffrier capax,
ffrier lendax
And ffrier mendax,
ffrier vorax
And ffrier nycticorax,
ffryer Iapax,
ffrier furderer
And ffrier murderer,
ffrier tottiface
And ffrier sottiface,
ffrier pottiface
And frier pockyface,
ffrier trottapace
And ffrier topiace,
ffrier futton
And ffrier glotton,
ffrier Galiard
And ffrier paliard,
ffrier goliard
And ffrier foliard,
ffrier goddard
And ffrier foddard,
ffrier ballard
And ffrier skallard,
ffrier crowsy
And ffrier lowsy,
ffrier sloboll
And ffrier bloboll,
ffrier toddypoll
And ffrier noddypoll,
ffrier fflaphole
And ffrier claphole,
ffrier kispott
And ffrier pispott,
ffrier chipchop
And ffrier likpott,
ffrier clatterer
And ffrier fflatterer,
ffrier bib, ffrier bob,
ffrier lib, ffrier lob,
ffrier fear, ffrier fonde,
ffrier beare, ffrier bonde,
ffrier rooke, ffrier py,
ffrier flooke, ffrier flye,
ffrier spitt, ffrier spy,
ffrier lik, ffrier ly,
with ffrier we-he
found by the trinytye,
And frier fandigo,
With an hundred mo
Could I name by ro,
Ne were for losse of tyme,
To make to longe a Ryme.
O squalidi laudati,
fedi effeminati,
falsi falsati,
fuci fucati,
Culi caccati,
Balbi braccati,
Mimi mardati,
Lerui leruati,
Crassi cathaphi,
Calvi cucullati,
Curvi curvati,
Skurvi knavati,
Spurci spoliati,
hirci armati,
vagi devastati,
Devij debellati,
Surdi sustentati,
Squalidi laudati,
Tardi terminati,
Mali subligati,
Inpij coniurati,
Profusi profugi,
Lapsi lubrici,
Et parum pudici!
Oth ye drane bees,
Ye bloody fleshe flees,
Ye spitefull spittle spyes,
And grounde of herisees,
That dayly without sweat
Do but drinke and Eate,
And murther meat and meat,
vt fures et latrones!
Ye be incubiones,
But no spadones,
Ye haue your culiones;
Ye be histriones,
Beastely ballatrones,
Grandes thrassones,
Magni nebulones,
And cacademones,
That [eat] vs fleshe and bones
With teeth more harde then stones.
Youe make hevy mones,
As it were for the nones,
With great and grevous grones,
By sightes and by sobbes
To blinde vs with bobbes.
Oh ye false faytours,
Youe theves be, and tratours,
The devils dayly wayters!
Oh mesell mendicantes,
And mangy obseruauntes!
Ye be vagarantes!
As persers pennytrantes,
Of mischef mynistrantes,
In pillinge postulantes,
In preachinge petulantes,
Of many sicophantes,
That gather, as do Antes,
In places wher ye go;
With in principio
Runnynge to and ffro,
Ye cause mikle woo
With hie and with loo;
Wher youe do resorte,
Ye fayne and make reporte
Of that youe never harde,
To make foles a-ferde
With visions and dremes,
howe they do in hevens,
And in other remes
Be-yonde the great stremes
Of Tyger and of gange,
Where tame devils range,
And in the black grange,
Thre myle out of hell,
Where sely Sowles dwell,
In paynes wher they lye,
howe they lament and cry
Vnto youe, holy lyars,
And false fflatteringe ffriers,
for dirige and masses;
Wherwith, like very asses,
We maynteyn youe and your lasses;
But in especiall
ye say, the sowles call
for the great trentall;
for some sely Sowles
So depe ly in holes
Of ffier and brennyng Coles,
That top and tayle is hid;
for whom to pray and bid,
Thens to haue them rid,
ye thinke it but a foly;
Althoughe the masse be holy,
The fendes be wyly:
Till masse of scala cely,
At Bathe or at Ely
Be by a ffrier saide,
That is a virgine mayde,
These sowles may not away,
As all yow ffriers say.
So trowe I without doubte
These sowles shall never out;
for it is rara avis;
Ye be so many knaves!
I swere, by crosses ten,
That fewe be honest men!
So many of youe be
Full of skurrilite,
That throughly to be sought
The multitude is noughte:
Ye be nothinge Denty;
Ye Come among vs plenty
By coples in a peire,
As sprites in the heire,
Or dogges in the ffayre;
Where yow do repayre,
Ye ever ride and rune,
As swifte as any gune,
With nowe to go and Come,
As motes in the Sonne,
To shrive my lady nonne,
With humlery hum,
Dominus vobiscum!
God knoweth all and Some,
what is and hath bene done,
Syns the world begone,
Of russett, gray, and white,
That sett ther hole delighte
In lust and lechery,
In thefte and trecherey,
In lowsy lewdenes,
In Synne and shrodenes,
In crokednes acurst,
Of all people the worste,
Marmosettes and apes,
That with your pild pates
Mock vs with your iapes.
Ye holy caterpillers!
Ye helpe your well-willers
With prayers and psalmes,
To devoure the Almes
That christians should give
To meynteyne and releve
The people poore and nedy;
But youe be gredy,
And so great a number,
That, like the ffier of thunder,
The worlde ye incomber:
But hereof do I wonder,
howe ye preache in prose,
And shape therto a glose,
Like a shipmans hose,
To fayne your-se[l]ves ded,
Whiche nathelesse be fed,
And Dayly Eate oure bred
That ye amonge vs beg,
And gett it spite of oure hede.
It wonder is to me,
howe ye maye fathers be,
Your sede to multiply,
But yf yow be incuby,
That gender gobolynes.
Be we not bobolynes,
sutch lesinges to beleve,
whiche ye amonge vs dry[ve]?
Because ye do vs shrive,
Ye say we must youe call
fathers Seraphicall
And angelicall,
That be fantasticall,
Brute and bestiall,
Yea, Diabolicall,
The babes of beliall,
The Sacrifise of ba[a]ll,
The dregges of all durte,
fast bounde and girte
vnder the devils skyrte;
for pater priapus,
And frater polpatus,
with doctor dulpatus,
Suffultus fullatus,
pappus paraliticus,
And pastour improvidus,
Be false and frivolus,
proude and pestiferous,
pold and pediculous,
Ranke and ridiculous,
Madd and meticulous,
Ever invidious,
never religious,
In preachinge prestigious,
In walkinge prodigious,
In talkinge sedicious,
In doctrine parnicious,
haute and ambicious,
ffonde and supersticious,
In lodginge prostibulus,
In beddinge promiscuous,
In Councells myschevous,
In musters monstrous,
In skulkinge insidicious,
vnchast and lecherous,
In excesse outragious,
As sicknesse contagious,
The wurst kind of Edders,
And stronge sturdy beggers:
Wher one stande and teaches,
An other prate and preches,
Like holy horseleches.
So this rusty rable
At bourd and at table
Shall fayne and fable,
With bible and with bable,
To make all thinge stable,
By lowringe and by lokinge,
By powrynge and by potinge,
By standinge and by stopinge,
By handinge and by ffotinge,
By Corsy and by Crokinge,
With their owne pelf promotinge,
With ther Eyes alweyes totinge
Wher they may haue shotinge
Ther and here ageyne:
Thus the people seyne,
with wordes true and playne,
howe they Iest and ioll
with ther nody poll,
with rownynge and rollinge,
with bowsinge and bollinge,
with lillinge and lollinge,
with knyllinge and knollinge,
with tillinge and tollinge,
with shavinge and pollinge,
with snyppinge and snatchinge,
with itchinge and cratchinge,
with kepinge and katchinge,
with wepinge and watchinge,
with takinge and tatchinge,
with peltinge and patchinge,
with findinge and fatchinge,
with scriblinge and scratchinge,
with ynkinge and blatchinge;
That no man can matche them,
Till the Devill fatche them,
And so to go together
vnto their denne for ever,
wher hens as they never
hereafter shall dissever,
But dy Eternally,
That lyve so carnally;
for that wilbe ther Ende,
But yf god them sende
his Grace here to amend:
And thus I make an Ende.

The grudge of ypocrites conceyved ageynst the Auctor of this treatise.

The Awnswer of the Auctour.