University of Virginia Library

The second Satyr.

[As promise presse thine to show]

Paule.
As promise presse thine to show
my minde to thee at large:
Euen so t'obserue due order is,
belonging to my charge.
Har[illeg.] therfore (first) how Nummus doth
beguile eche kinde of men:
Howe it through force and vyle effect
doth noysome humor blen:
His beautie (first) and pregnant show,
and then his mighty force,
Enchaunteth so the peoples hartes:
that (voyde of all remorse)
They fawne & gape, they watch and prie,
they leaze and oft forsweare,
They worke the thing that wicked is,
they cursse, they ban and teare
The blessed name of great Iehoue,
and all to wyn the {fame}
They put {in} vre they practise still
to get the golden hame.

Men of Lawe.

And first beholde our men of law:
let them haue chiefest place,
Sith by the lawes, [illeg.] common weath
doth runne his nightfall race.
And for that Lawes accoumpted are,
eche where the chiefest staye:
Let Lawiers then be principall,
and first within my playe.

Iudges.

But as for Iudges now to iudge,
my iudgement will not saye:
I wote full well, their prayse was spread
by me this other daye.
And Trueth it is, our Iudgement seates
such Uyrent heades possesse,
As former dayes for men of choyse,
had neuer such I guesse.
What then? no sort, no one degree,
no place, no function so
Uprightly standes, but with the good
some wicked weede doth growe.
With vertues league, som vice doth lynk
and forme of godly vew
Oft equall makes with men of troth,
some Hypocrites vntrue.
I knowe friend Bertulph, fewe there be
whose hands regarde no meede,
Whose hartes Dye no deceypt at all,
from whome no harmes proceede.
And sure I am, when cause of troth,
before such men is tryde,
{VV}ith simple troth, they Iustice yeelde,
and iustly do decyde.
But nowe, although with these there syt
no one that doth dissent
Though all of them in publicque place
doo sing Amesine lentent
Yet vnderhande perhaps there are
that nowe and then deuoure
The sugred sappe that Iustice yeeldes:
And where they lyst to lowre
For spyte or gayne, or priuate wreke,
there Iustice course is stayde.
And where they lyst to smoother troth,
there, right is cleane dismayde.
Such such there be (or haue bin some)
who when they rule alone,
When scope & course hath hoyst them vp
and set them chiefe in Throne
From Censors sight, and priuate made
their swaye and supreme place:
Then then they wring & wrong the right,
then then they truth deface.
Ah Bertulph, be there not thinke you,
In place of Iustice sette
Some fained sortes of fawning Spreetes
that course of Iustice lette?
That frame a semblaunce sound and good,
that iuste and holy seeme,
And yet in harte are fraught with guyle,
and ofte vniustly deeme?
I feare I feare me falsehod lurkes
in lappes of learned syse
I feare me Nummus oft peruerts
in some that go for wyse:
So then, some chiefe and some besides
so smally ponder meede,
That where they syt in common swaye,
there, Iustice doth proceede.
But some againe where place hath made
their powres distinct, I feare
Of popish willes, through gruteh or gaine
with much enorme do beare.
And hence, from hence I feare me come
these cryes of common sort
That oft lament and oft affyrme
their Iudgement to be fort.
One here bewayles his wofull case
and wisheth him vnborne,
Another cryes with wringing handes,
alas, I am forlorne
My sute thus long depended hath:
The Lawe is on my syde,
And yet in harde delayes I lye
true Iudgement to abyde.
Another thus: be friended is,
the Iudge doth loue him well
And me (as poore and needie) they
doo dayly thus depell
Two hundreth myles and more I come:
My Wife at home (alas)
Lyes with my Children halfe forepynde:
(O lamentable case.)
My goods are spent, which labor brought,
through long and carefull toyle:
The Lawe hath lyckt vp all my wealth
for which I dyd turmoyle.
Oh, I can haue no Law nor right,
ne Money haue I nowe:
I must go beg, my goodes be gone,
to lyue I knowe not howe.
These eares of mine abhorred haue,
mine eyes haue wet my plants.
My hart hath yernd in Iudgement true,
to see such wofull wants.
Tys harde to saye, Ile holde my peace.
But if these playnts be true,
Syr Nummus swayeth there with some,
(a woorthy cause to rue.)
But vnto him that highest syts,
and sees eche secrete yll,
With prayer I commytte the same,
t'amende it at his wyll.

Practisers at the Law.

And nowe to Lawiers that do parle,
and pleade in cause of right,
To such as for syr Nummus wyll
turne darknesse into lyght,
And lyght into obscured sence,
and arsiuersie turne eche thing:
To such wyll I proceede as now,
and to my matter bring.
I wyll not speake of fine deuise,
nor fowle deceyptfull clause,
In Leases, wyls, and other lyke,
but wresting of the Lawes
And foding of the Clyent forth:
for though that fraude abound,
And though by falsely framing so,
eche where are beggers founde:
Yet I as nowe will blason forth,
and geue you well to see,
Howe these men ioyne in matters false,
retayned for a fee.
And so for Nummus long delaye
a poore and needy soule,
To fleese and flea the simple wretche,
to pylfer and to powle:
To shred him cleane from all his wealth,
and then perhaps relent,
And ware full colde to ayde his right,
when Nummus all is spent.
Yea lykewise tys in doubte with some,
when Nummus so doth fayle,
If they through brybe of {thother} syde,
let not the sute to quayle.
A Fee of Forma pauperis?
no no it hath no sent.
Such formall Fees finde smal reliefe
they buy no lande ne rent.
My friend (therfore) if you haue nought
wherewith to see me styll
But formes and showes, Take formes againe
for Counsayle if you wyll.
But what sayde I? was promise made
to paint such practise heere?
No no: If so, I must relent:
Great matter doth appeare
Therein: and therefore will I leaue
them to the worldly vewe:
I meane the false and subtil ones,
I speake not of the true,
Nor such as are affected well
(as many there are such
Although the false in number doo
exceede them very much.)
But well, go too: this gotten good
howe is it spent I praye?
Forsooth, no poore man must haue lande:
for so wyll they assaye
And practise, that in tyme they wyll
gette all into their handes.
And turne the poore men headlong forth
of all both house and landes.
A shame it were and great reproche
to see a poore man dwell,
Or haue a house not farre from theirs:
their Noses hate the smell.
And long (no doubt) their Noses be,
right mischeuous of Sent:
For that which once was lande demeasne,
is holden nowe for rent.
They smell it forth, though farre it be:
they haue a vengeaunce hooke:
Both Parsnage and ought besides
theyle haue by hooke or crooke.
Their Princely Places stately be,
their houses buylt for aye,
Their Turrettes vp aloft are raysde,
foundations deepe they laye,
So thus (no doubt) and farre more yll,
they let syr Nummus wagge,
Reseruing still some mightie Masse
to rust within the bagge.
And here you see what wayte they laye
and eke what wayes they vse
To get this pelfe: and gotten, see
how they the same abuse.

Attorneyes and Petypractisers.

The next are Petypractisers
and Petyfogging mates:
Yea, Clarkes, Attorneyes, such of them
as lyne of lewde debates,
Eache honest calling towardes Lawe,
so pressed is from Sise,
That hardly can an honest man
with honesty aryse.
And twise as hardly may he stande,
to stoppe eche strayned shyfte.
Such force hath falsehood, more thē truth,
so deadly can they lyfte.
What crewes of greedy griping crowes,
what fowle infecting rowte.
Good Lord, what store of gleaning Iacks
dispersed are through out?
Can Lawes reliefe be easily got,
or gotten, can't do ease,
Where such great troupes of bribing fists
must fyrst syr Nummus cease?
Of trueth such traines, of truthles mates
such heapes of monsters dwell
Tweene playnts and fynall Iudgements seate,
that greater woes in hell
If hell were as the Poets wryte,
I thinke coulde not be felt.
Eare Soles haue ende, such chardge, such toyle,
as make my harte to melt.
But whence aryse these rauening rowtes?
whence spring they? Sure from guyle
And of disdaine to vulgare state,
wherein their Parents toyle.
Well, these be they, that what for tale
and what for falsehod great,
Doo taynt the Realme with stryfes, & stop
the waye to Iustice seate.
That make the iuyce of Iustice sowre,
that turne the Lawes to wreake,
That make true Iudgemēt taste like gall,
that nought but falsehod speake.
That liue and lustily lashe out
in purchase or in pride
More largely then of Countrey States
doth any State beside.
But here to shew what prowling means,
what pranckes this pylfring sort
Doo vse to gette syr Nummus with,
and so holde vp their porte:
This this to doo, were to to harde.
Naye, this were such a woorcke
As if one only man should prease
to fight against the Turcke.
But greater, yea farre greater t'were
to clense this Chanell cleane.
I thinke Augæus Oxestalles were
to this a worcke but meane.
I knowe good Iudges haue begoonne
and waded verie farre
I knowe that some, to helpe these hurtes,
right godly carefull are.
But new found Clerckes and Officers
so prease with might and mayne,
That (Hydra like) one head cut of,
for eary head springs twayne.
Good Lord, & shall these wandring Spreets
aye walcke abroade at wyll?
Shall Numus no where start, but streight
these Catchpolles catch him styll?
Shall no mannes eye that lyues this day,
beholde a better state?
Ah, out alas, and shall this rowte
feede alwayes of debate?
Why then, what man shall lyue in peace?
whose porcion shall be fast?
Whose land and lyuing shall be free
where these men once are plast?
And where almost, or in what Soyle
do not these Monsters swarme?
What coast frend Bertulph can you name
where these men do not harme?
I knowe in thissame calling are
a sort of seemely Wights
That lyue in peace, and further peace,
that so their Countrey dights
With sounde examples of good life,
with Iustice and with truth,
That scarce from any state of men
a better lyfe ensuth.
And in this speache of mine, I meane
and eke do comprehende
Not only Clerckes and Practisers
But also do intende
That Counsaylers haue equall praise
and higher praise in deede
By howe much they in higher place
and higher thinges proceede.
But these, all these are nowe so matcht
and ouerswayde with swarmes:
That seeld and seldome can they helpe
to keepe the good from harmes.
I wishe to God some Theseus
might giue a choppe or twayne
And rather then these heads should stand,
to choppe and choppe againe.
Nowe, wheras Bertulph here perhaps
you looke I should declare
How this great Rabble rakes for coyne,
and howe they Nummus snare:
I tell you as I tolde you earst,
this is too much for me:
The pennes of twenty skilfull men
for this would needefull be.
In briefe, yet thus I dare affyrme
that these superfluous traynes
In Lawyers state, vse fowle deceytes
t'inlarge their priuate gaynes.
Which gotten once, is lewdly spent
in pompe and prowde araye,
To whose fowle rapine seely wightes
are ofte and ofte a praye.
I leaue them as I lefte the rest,
I touche and go my wayes.
This short discourse shewes well enough
howe here syr Nummus swayes.