More Knaues yet? :: :: University of Virginia Library

The Ocean Monarch Neptune, in whose Pallace,
Thetis, with all her Mermaids made abode:
Mounted the crooked Dolphin for his solace,
And from his Court vnto the Shore he rode,
Where he encounterd with his lustfull eyes,
A richer beauty then was Paris prize.

Caneus, sweetest faire Thessalian mayd,
Her did his lust with rauishment defile:
As Tarquin delt with Lucrese, so he play'd.
The Dolphin was his pander: all the while,
To Iupiter shee did lament the rape:
And he transform'd her into manly shape.

The Picture of a Pirat.

My dwelling is vpon the raging waues,
My house by stormes is tost and carried still:
My seruants are a crew of theeuish Knaues,
To Neptunes rage I Tennant am at will,
My Neighbours are the Monsters of the Seas:
The great Leuiathan, and worse then these.

My life is spent in all outragious euils,
Vertue abhors the place of my abode:
My Ship is man'd euen with Incarnate deuils,
My heart (with Dauid's foole) denies a God,
And those same lavves (they say) he gaue to men:
My lawlesse nature keepes not one of ten.

When for a time I haue run on my race,
As former Pirates, my vngratious Fellowes:
I must expect a fatall dying place:
And make account to Anker at the Gallowes:
There like a Swan, to sing my dying hower,
That liu'd a Rauen, onely to deuoure.

To a Reprobate Pirat that hath renounced Christ and is turn'd Turke.

Thou wicked lumpe of onely sin, and shame,
(Renouncing Christian faith & Christian name)
A villaine, worse then he that Christ betray'd,
His Maister, for Gods Son, he ne're denay'd,
But did confesse him Iust and Innocent,
When with his bribe backe to the Priests he went.
Thou that art worse then deuils, they confest
Christ was the Son of God, thou Hellish Beast,
That hast liu'd cursed Theife vpon the Seas,
And now a Turke on shore dost take thine ease,
Like a deuouring monster in a den,
All that thou hast, being spoyles of other men.
Thou that doest serue both Turke, and deuill so well,
Thou seek'st to draw (as they doe) soules to Hell,
Hauing a garment ready in thy hall,
For him that next from Christian Faith doth fall,
Receiue this warning from thy natiue Land;
Gods fearefull Iudgements (villaine) are at hand.
Deuils attend, Hell fier is prepar'd:
Perpetuall flames is reprobates Re-ward.

The Fox taken, comming to take.

Strange is the strife, where Sathan is deuided,
Two theeues would haue a true mans cause decided
Betweene them twaine, for taking him at Seas,
Or else they swore each other to displease.
One would haue all the ready Coyne was found
For boarding first, were it ten thousand pound;
And then the other goods, equall diuide:
Quoth tother, first ile sincke euen by thy side.
So too't they goe with fierce and cruell fight,
Vntill the one of them was sonke downe right,
And tother had his men euen almost slaine:
And those sore wounded, did aliue remaine,
With that the prisoners being in the prize,
For their recouery, with themselues deuise,
And of a manly resolution, fall
Vpon the Pirats, and subdue them all.
Recouering that sea-losse they had before,
So brought them kindly to be hang'd a shore.
And the old ancient Prouerbe true did make,
Some Fox is taken when he comes to take.

Like will to Like.

Sea Theife, and Land Theife, met by accident,
Vpon the way: and so consorted went,
Vnto a Towne, where they together In me:
There talke in what great dangers they haue bin,
And in their cups comparisons did make:
Which of them did most danger vndertake.
I (quoth purse-taker) that doe liue a Land,
Prepare my foes to fight, in bidding stand,
Drawing my weapon like a Martiall man,
Hauing no woodden wals to hide me than,
And creepe into a Cabbin from a shot:
Quoth tother, slaue, my goods is manlier got
A thousand times, then such night-crowes and Owles,
That lurke in bushes, like hedge-creeping fowles,
And cowardly vpon a man will set:
Through fire and water I my liuing get,
By thundring shot and stormy raging seas,
When thou wilt picke a pocket at thine ease.
Pocket (quoth he) and stabs him sodainly:
Tother againe with ponyard did reply,
Each charging th' other for an arrant theife.
So Constable came in, and to be breife,
Wapping, and Tyburne chaunc'd to be their ends:
And so the hangman made them quiet friends.

Lightly come, Lightly goe.

Captaine, ti's we do make things cheape or deare,
As by our peny-worths it doth appeare.
A yard with vs is iust in length a pike:
To buy silkes so, what man is't will dislike,
Or say we vse our customers amisse?
Your London measure (friends) comes short of this,
Bee't three pile Veluet, Sattin, Taffaty,
A Souldiers Pike's the Ell we measure by.
Thus much for Mercers: next for Grocers trade,
Our weight is like vnto our measure made,
Our pound's a Cannon bullet, good downe vvaight,
In Spice, or Suger, this is no deceit.
Then for our wines (the squeaking Vintners Art)
We can affoord them for a penny a quarto.
Yea fill yon pintes euen by the bucket full,
But how can this be, faith some simple gull,
That neuer trauail'd out of Bow-bell sound?
Marry Sim-simple heare and stand thy ground.
That which we haue, we steale from friends and foes,
It comes good cheape, and so good cheape it goes.

When theeues fall out true men come by their goods.

When theeues fall out, it hath bin often known,
True men by their contention get their own.
A sharing sort, extreamely did fall out
For true mens goods, they long had been about
At seas (a theeuing) and being come a shore:
Some had too much, and others claimed more.
So 'mongst them all there was extreame adoe,
For that which none of them had right vnto.
To law they durst not goe about their claime,
Fearing 'twould out how they had got the same.
So in a furie euen as hot as fire:
To fight it out in field they had desire.
And being met in strange tumultuous sort:
Great companies to see them did resort,
Who (after many wounds) do part the fray:
And carry those that doe the hurt away.
They that were wounded made account to dye,
And therefore told the truth most willingly,
Of this contention how the quarrell grew:
So true men got their owne, and theeues their due.

All's Fish that comes to net.

These damned Dice (I thinke) if truth were known,
Are made of diuels horne, or Diues bone.
Aboue a hundred pound I lost last night,
But woe to them that next appeare in sight:
For whome they are, or whence so e're they bee,
My money double and their deaths Ile see.
Bring me a Canne of wine boy, quickly lad,
Put in Gun-powder, for ile drinke me mad.
Get cords and sticks to turne about their braines:
They'le ne're confesse vnlesse a man take paines,
And wring it out of them euen in despight:
Or burne their fingers ends with candle light.
Where they haue hid their money they'le denie:
What mercy to such villaines, that will lie
To gentlemen like we, that ventrous winne,
And haue no other trade of comming in?
I make as much account to kill a flea,
As rob my father if we meet at sea.
Be who it will, a stranger or my brother:
Conscience is one thing, stealing is another.
As Constables forget their friends in watch:
So weele know no man, when his goods we catch.

False Knaues will neuer be true.

Two wicked villaines of the cursed crue,
Did vow to be vnto each other true;
In all they got vpon the high-way side,
What ere it was, most equall to diuide.
Remaining sharers thus, too well they sped,
Till one of them fell sicke and kept his bed.
The partner theife, then took the trade alone,
And desp'ratly did venter, fearing none.
As phrase is vsd, without both feare or wit,
Many bold robberies he did commit,
And scapt them all, but yet with many a wound,
Meane time the other was recouered sound:
And comes to question with his fellow theefe,
Acquainting him with wants and money griefe:
Demanding of him by their league and vow,
The halfe that he had gotten to allow,
For fellow (saith he) we are bound by oath,
To share all purchase equall twixt vs both.
Tis true (quoth tother) Ile not be forsworne,
To breake my promise with thee, I do scorne.

So drawes a Bag of mony, and his sword,
And sayes behold, I meane to keepe my word,
There's halfe the mony for thee thou dost craue,
And come and take thee halfe the wounds I haue
We will be halfes aswell in th' one as th' other,
Ile bate you not a scar, good Theefe sworne brother,
When he had heard his resolution thus,
Pray' Iudas (quoth he) keepe the Bagge for vs,
Share wounds, I like not, thou maist sheath thy blade
Weele haue a Scriuener, when next match is made.

Curelesse, and Carelesse.

In cruell stormes at Sea, and great distresse.
The rage of Neptune seeming mercilesse,
Ship-wracke expected, each man full of greife,
A desp'rate fellow fell to eate salt Beefe:
Feeding so greedy that the rest admir'd,
And what might moue him therevnto requir'd?
Marry (quoth he) you see we must be drown'd,
And I doe feede vpon salt Meat, thus sound,
As the best victuals to cause thirst, I thinke.
For we in Sea shall haue but too much drinke.