 | The poetical works of Samuel Woodworth |  |
RAISING THE WIND.
It's ever been the study of mankind,
In every station, how to raise the wind;
And who attempts it with the least address,
Is oft rewarded with the most success;
As many a novice, by a lucky throw,
Has foiled the science of a veteran foe.
In every station, how to raise the wind;
And who attempts it with the least address,
Is oft rewarded with the most success;
As many a novice, by a lucky throw,
Has foiled the science of a veteran foe.
Raising the wind, however, I'll engage,
Is not confined to climate, sex, or age;
But is, in fact, the universal trade,
Of infant, parent, widow, wife, and maid.
Is not confined to climate, sex, or age;
But is, in fact, the universal trade,
Of infant, parent, widow, wife, and maid.
Young master Fretful, spoiled by fond mamma,
Espies a treasure in the sweetmeat jar;
And, if refused to taste the luscious store,
Tunes up his pipes to a melodious roar.
Espies a treasure in the sweetmeat jar;
And, if refused to taste the luscious store,
Tunes up his pipes to a melodious roar.
50
“Give him a rod!” the angry father cries;
“Nay, nay! my dear!” the tender spouse replies,
“You'll break poor Jacky's heart, or spoil his eyes;
'T is hard to cross so innocent a wish—
Here, Jacky, take some, on this china dish;
Here, deary, wipe your eyes—papa 's unkind”—
Jack smiles again—for he has raised the wind.
“Nay, nay! my dear!” the tender spouse replies,
“You'll break poor Jacky's heart, or spoil his eyes;
'T is hard to cross so innocent a wish—
Here, Jacky, take some, on this china dish;
Here, deary, wipe your eyes—papa 's unkind”—
Jack smiles again—for he has raised the wind.
Tom Rustic throws the hoe indignant down,
Assumes his Sunday suit, and comes to town,
Obtains employment in a dry-goods store,
And soon forgets whate'er he know before:
Commences dandy in his dress and air,
And learns to smoke and gamble, drink and swear;
Transformed in manners, dialect, and feature,
Till his own parents scarcely know the creature.
Assumes his Sunday suit, and comes to town,
Obtains employment in a dry-goods store,
And soon forgets whate'er he know before:
Commences dandy in his dress and air,
And learns to smoke and gamble, drink and swear;
Transformed in manners, dialect, and feature,
Till his own parents scarcely know the creature.
“I say—Ned—demme—where was you last night?
We 'd fun enough at Cato's—blame me tight!
I bilked the driver, too—ha, ha! keep dark,
Poor yellow Billy, down there by the Park:
You know that Hudson note—well, do n't you think,
The fellow took it—gave the change in chink;
The rascal certainly was drunk or blind,
But, ha! ha! ha! egad, I raised the wind.”
We 'd fun enough at Cato's—blame me tight!
I bilked the driver, too—ha, ha! keep dark,
Poor yellow Billy, down there by the Park:
You know that Hudson note—well, do n't you think,
The fellow took it—gave the change in chink;
The rascal certainly was drunk or blind,
But, ha! ha! ha! egad, I raised the wind.”
51
Sir Richard Rake, once lord of boundless wealth,
A bankrupt now, in fortune, fame, and health,
Becomes enamored of the widow Dash,
Possessed of many thousand charms—in cash;
His passion knows no bounds—he kneels and sighs,
While his whole soul is beaming from his eyes.
A bankrupt now, in fortune, fame, and health,
Becomes enamored of the widow Dash,
Possessed of many thousand charms—in cash;
His passion knows no bounds—he kneels and sighs,
While his whole soul is beaming from his eyes.
“Divine, angelic creature! Here I vow,
This bosom never glowed with love till now;
Oh, then, be kind, and grant my ardent prayer,
Nor doom a faithful lover to despair!
Your matchless charms”—
“Oh, fie! Sir Richard, hush!
Such high-flown praises really make me blush;
Fled are the trifling charms which once were mine,
Though, to be sure, I'm only thirty—nine.”
This bosom never glowed with love till now;
Oh, then, be kind, and grant my ardent prayer,
Nor doom a faithful lover to despair!
Your matchless charms”—
“Oh, fie! Sir Richard, hush!
Such high-flown praises really make me blush;
Fled are the trifling charms which once were mine,
Though, to be sure, I'm only thirty—nine.”
“Nay, hear me, dearest madame—though I prize,
Above all earthly good, those beauteous eyes!
It is your mental charms that touch my heart,
That cultivated mind, that heavenly part,
So high above the reach of flattery's art.”
Above all earthly good, those beauteous eyes!
It is your mental charms that touch my heart,
That cultivated mind, that heavenly part,
So high above the reach of flattery's art.”
“And do you really think so?” “Shall I swear?”
“Oh, no, I would not drive you to despair—
There—there 's my hand—I can not be unkind.”
'T is thus our fortune-hunters raise the wind.
“Oh, no, I would not drive you to despair—
There—there 's my hand—I can not be unkind.”
'T is thus our fortune-hunters raise the wind.
52
But time would fail me, and your patience too,
Should I this boundless subject thus pursue,
And show the various arts by which mankind,
Of every grade, contrive to raise the wind.
The quack effects it, when and where he pleases,
By advertising cures for all diseases;
The politician gives his friends a lift,
Then takes the fattest office in their gift.
The Wall-street broker shaves you in a note,
The humble showman, with a learned goat.
A more adventurous soul will raise a breeze
By seal-clad natives brought from over seas;
While lottery-venders, thinking fortune blind,
Assume her functions, and so raise the wind.
Should I this boundless subject thus pursue,
And show the various arts by which mankind,
Of every grade, contrive to raise the wind.
The quack effects it, when and where he pleases,
By advertising cures for all diseases;
The politician gives his friends a lift,
Then takes the fattest office in their gift.
The Wall-street broker shaves you in a note,
The humble showman, with a learned goat.
A more adventurous soul will raise a breeze
By seal-clad natives brought from over seas;
While lottery-venders, thinking fortune blind,
Assume her functions, and so raise the wind.
Not so your humble servant, whose sole wish
Was to prepare an intellectual dish
To treat his friends—and if he can not raise
A gale of approbation in his praise,
Yet still he hopes his well-intended toils,
Will meet the gentler sunshine of your smiles.
Was to prepare an intellectual dish
To treat his friends—and if he can not raise
A gale of approbation in his praise,
Yet still he hopes his well-intended toils,
Will meet the gentler sunshine of your smiles.
| The poetical works of Samuel Woodworth | |