 | The select poems of Dr. Thomas Dunn English (exclusive of the "Battle lyrics") |  |
669
THE KITCHEN QUARREL.
A DOMESTIC APOLOGUE.
Said the Poker at the jamb to the Kettle on the hob—
“Idle thing!
While I labor at my hot and grimy job
You do nothing more than sit content and sing.
While with fiery coals I battle
There your lid you gaily rattle;
Or you go to sleep and dream,
With your nostrils breathing steam.
Pleasant work is all you do—
Ah! if I were only you!
But in this degenerate day
Merit never wins its way;
Hence you queen it, while a quiet drudge I am;
But I'll strike, if I like!”
Said the discontented Poker at the jamb.
“Idle thing!
While I labor at my hot and grimy job
You do nothing more than sit content and sing.
While with fiery coals I battle
There your lid you gaily rattle;
Or you go to sleep and dream,
With your nostrils breathing steam.
Pleasant work is all you do—
Ah! if I were only you!
But in this degenerate day
Merit never wins its way;
Hence you queen it, while a quiet drudge I am;
But I'll strike, if I like!”
Said the discontented Poker at the jamb.
Said the Kettle on the hob to the Poker at the jamb—
“Crusty thing!
While engaged in boiling busily I am,
Or, to give them warning, cheerily I sing;
While I clatter, hiss, or bubble,
Never grudging time or trouble,
There you idle stand and wait,
Lazy, sullen, stiff and straight;
Or, if in the embers thrust,
Ashes scattering and dust
All above, around, below,
Showing, plain as steel can show,
Neither willingness nor pleasure in the job;
You may strike, if you like!”
Said the pert and noisy Kettle on the hob.
“Crusty thing!
While engaged in boiling busily I am,
Or, to give them warning, cheerily I sing;
While I clatter, hiss, or bubble,
Never grudging time or trouble,
There you idle stand and wait,
Lazy, sullen, stiff and straight;
Or, if in the embers thrust,
Ashes scattering and dust
All above, around, below,
Showing, plain as steel can show,
670
You may strike, if you like!”
Said the pert and noisy Kettle on the hob.
Said the Mantel-shelf above to the jarring twain below—
“Silly pair!
Do you really fancy, when you quarrel so,
That the people either notice you or care?
If, your duty close pursuing,
You your talking left for doing,
Had no envy, each for each,
Some content at least you'd reach.
Go to work, and with a will;
You have each his place to fill;
Yours, the Poker, is to toil
That the Kettle quicker boil;
Yours, the Kettle, is to bear a heating sore,
Not to strike if you like!”
Said the Mantel-shelf, and then it said no more.
“Silly pair!
Do you really fancy, when you quarrel so,
That the people either notice you or care?
If, your duty close pursuing,
You your talking left for doing,
Had no envy, each for each,
Some content at least you'd reach.
Go to work, and with a will;
You have each his place to fill;
Yours, the Poker, is to toil
That the Kettle quicker boil;
Yours, the Kettle, is to bear a heating sore,
Not to strike if you like!”
Said the Mantel-shelf, and then it said no more.
Then the Poker at the jamb and the Kettle on the hob
Lost their ire,
Though the Kettle gave a short, convulsive sob
As it shook itself and settled on the fire.
With the coals the Poker wrestled
Till the Kettle lower nestled,
And its spite forgotten soon,
Hummed the first notes of a tune.
Working all into a glow,
There the Poker stirred below;
'Gainst the bars it beat and rang
Till the Kettle chirped and sang;
And the goodwife said: “This is a sight to please!
Let them say what they may,
Never was there in a kitchen such as these!”
Lost their ire,
Though the Kettle gave a short, convulsive sob
As it shook itself and settled on the fire.
With the coals the Poker wrestled
Till the Kettle lower nestled,
And its spite forgotten soon,
Hummed the first notes of a tune.
Working all into a glow,
There the Poker stirred below;
'Gainst the bars it beat and rang
Till the Kettle chirped and sang;
And the goodwife said: “This is a sight to please!
Let them say what they may,
Never was there in a kitchen such as these!”
| The select poems of Dr. Thomas Dunn English (exclusive of the "Battle lyrics") | |