University of Virginia Library

“It seems to me you've been gone a hundred
million billion years, and you've no idea what a
forlorn old rat-trap of a plais it is Without You, nor how
the Young Ones do rase Kain. They keep up the Darndest
row—Auntie. I didn't mean to use that word, and
I'll scratch it right out, but when you are away, I'll be
dar—There I was going to say it agen. I'm a perfectly
Dredful Boy, ain't I? But I do love you, Auntie, and
last night,—now don't you tell pa, nor Tish, nor Nobody,
—last night after I went to bed, I cried and cried and
crammed the sheet in my mouth to keep Jim from hearing
me till I most vomited.

“Ben and Burt behave awful. Clem heard their
Prayers and right in the midst of Our father, Burt
stopped and asked if Mr. John Smith, the Storekeeper,
was related to John the baptis. Clem laughed and then

Ben struck her with his fist and Burt, who is a little red
pepper any How pitched in And kicked Burt. The fuss
waked up Daisy who fell out of bed and screamed like
Murder, then Tish, great Tattle Tail, must go for Father
who came up with a big Gadd and declared he'd have
order in His own house. You know the Young Ones
aint a bit afraid of Him and Ben and Burt kept on their
fightin tell Clem said `I shall tell Miss Dora how you
act.' That stopped 'em and the last I heard Burt was
coaxing Clem:

“`Don't tell Auntie. I'se good now, real good.'

“Maybee it's mean in me to tell you but I want you to
know just how They carry on, hoping you'll pick up
your traps and come home. No I don't neither for I
want you to stay and have a good time which I'm sure
you don't have here. I wish most you was my Mother
though I guess girls of 25 don't often have great strappin
Boys like me, do they? I asked Dr. West and he
looked so queer when he said, `It is possible but not
common.' Why not, I wonder? Now, Auntie, I don't
want mother to die, because she's Mother, but if she
should, you'll have father, won't you? That's a nice
Auntie, and that makes me think. Last night mother
had the headache and Dr. West was here. It was after
the Rumpus in the nursery and I was sitting at the head
of the stairs wishing you was come home when I heard
'em talking about you and what do you think mother

told Doctor? A lot of stuff about you and that nasty
Reed who was here last summer. She talked as if you
liked him,—said he would be at Mrs. Randall's and she
rather expected it would be settled then. I was so mad,
I bumped right up and down on the stairs and said Darn,
Darn, as fast as I could. Now, Auntie, I didn't mean
to lie, but I have. I've told a whopper and you can bite
my head off if you like. Dr's voice sounded just as if he
didn't want you to like that Reed and I diddent think it
right to let it go. So this morning I went over to the
office and found Dr. West looking pale as if he diddent
sleep good.

“`Doctor,' says I, `do I look like a chap that will
lie?'

“`Why, no,' says he, `I never thought you did.'

“`But I will,' ses I, `and I am come to do that very
thing, come to tell you something Aunt Dora made me
promise never to tell.'

“`John, you mussent, I can't hear you,' he began, but
I yelled up, `you shall; I will tell; it's about Dora
and that Reed. She don't like him.' Somehow he
stopped hushin' me then and pretended to fix his books
while I said how last summer I overheard this Reed ask
you to be his wife, and you told him no; you did not
love him well enough, and never could, and how you
meant it too. There diddent neither of you know I was
out in the balcony, I said, until he was gone, and I

sneazed when you talked to me and made me promise
never to tell what I'd heard to father, nor mother, nor
nobody. I never did tell them, but I've told the doctor,
and I ain't sorry, it made him look so glad. He took
me, and Tish, and Ben, and Burt, all out riding this
afternoon and talked to them real nice, telling them they
must be good while you was gone. Tish and Jim are
pretty good, but Ben has broken the spy-glass and the
umberill, and Burt has set down on the kittens, and oh I
must tell you; he took a big iron spoon which he called
a sovel and dug up every single gladiola in the garden!
Ain't they terrible Boys?

“There, they've found where I be, and I hear Burt coming
up the stairs one step at a time, so I must stop, for
they'll tip over the ink, or something. Dear Auntie, I
do love you ever and ever so much, and if you want my
Auntie and a grown up woman I'd marry you. Do boys
ever marry their aunts?