University of Virginia Library

LETTER XLIX.

My dear old Friend.—We 've had a kind of a
hurly burly time here to-day. I did n't know but we

should burst the biler one spell; and some of us, as
it was, got scalding hot. You see, I and the president
and a few more gentlemen got into the steam-boat
this morning to go round into old Virginny to
help lay the foundation of a monument, so they should
n't forget who Washington's mother was.

When we got down along to Alexandria, the boat
hauled up to the side of the wharf awhile to let some
more folks get in, and while she lay there, I and the
president and a few more of 'em sot in the cabin reading
and chatting with one another. The president
had jest got through reading a letter from uncle
Joshua Downing, urging him very strongly to come
up as fur as Downingville when he comes on that way.
And says he, Major Downing, this uncle Joshua of
yours is a real true blue republican as I know of any
where. I would n't miss seeing him when I go down
east for a whole year's salary.

Says I, your honor, Downingville is the most thorough
going republican town there is any where in the eastern
country; and you ought not to come back till
you have visited it. Jest as I said that there was a
stranger came into the cabin and stept along up to the
president, and begun to pull off his glove. I thought
there was some mischief bruing, for his lips were kind
of quivery, and I did n't like the looks of his eyes
a bit. But the president thought he was trying to
get his gloves off to shake hands with him, and the
good old man is always ready to shake hands with a
friend; so he reached out his hand to him and smiled,
and told him never to stand for the gloves, and the
words want hardly out of his mouth when dab went one
of the fellow's hands slap into the president's face.

In a moment I levelled my umbrella at the villain's
head, and came pesky near fetching him to the floor.
Two more gentlemen then clenched him by the collar
and had him down as quick as ever you see a beef ox
knocked down with an ax. In a minute there was a
crowd round him as thick as a swarm of bees.

But, my stars, I wish you could have seen the president
jest at that minute. If you ever see a lion lying
down asleep and a man come along with a great club and
hit him a plot with all his might, and then see that lion
spring on his feet, and see the fire flash in his eyes, and
hear him roar and gnash his teeth, you might give some
sort of a guess what kind of a harrycane we had of it.

The old Gineral no sooner felt the fellow's paw in
his face than he sprung like a steel-trap, and catched
his cane and went at him. But there was such a crowd
of men there in an instant, that it was as much impossible
to get through 'em as it was for the British to get
through his pile of cotton wool bags at New-Orleans.
If it had n't been for that, I dont think but he would
have kicked the feller through the side of the steam-boat
in two minutes.

However, somehow or other the rascal got hussled out
of the boat on to the wharf, and fled like a dog that
had been stealing sheep. They have sent some officers
after him, but where they will overtake him nobody
knows.

The president has got cleverly cooled down again,
and we are going on to lay the foundation of the monument.

My love to all the good folks up in Downingville.