University of Virginia Library

LETTER IV.

Mr. Downing relates the scrape the legislature got into,
in trying to make a number of governors.

Dear Cousin Ephraim.—I spose you expected me
to write to you agin long afore now and tell you something
more about these legislaters, and I meant to, but I
could n't very well; for I'll tell you jest how twas.—
Some days, when the legislater would get into a plaguy
hobble, I would think to myself, well, soon as they get
out of this snarl, I'll write to cousin Ephraim and tell
him all about it; but before they got fairly out of that,
they'd be right into another; and if I waited till next
day to see how that ended, my keesers! before night
they'd all be higgeldy piggle in a worse hobble than
they'd ever been in afore. So if I wait to tell you how
it comes out, I believe I shall have to wait till haying
time. Another thing I've been waiting for, was to tell
you who was Governor. But, O dear, I cant find out
half so much about it now, here in this great city of
Portland, where all the Governors live, as I could six
months ago among the bear traps and log houses in our
town, way back into the woods. Last August, you know,
according to the papers we were going to have two
Governors right off, sure as rates; Mr. Hunton and Mr.
Smith. Well now its got to be the first of February,
and we haven't got one yet. And although the governormakers
have had four or five under way for a month
past, some think it very doubtful whether they will get
one done so as to be fit to use this year. There's Mr.
Hunton, and Mr. Smith, and Mr. Culter, and Mr.
Goodenow, and Mr. Hall, have all been partly made
into Governors; but when in all creation any of 'em
will be finished, I guess it would puzzle a Philadelphy
lawyer to tell. I stated in my letter to uncle Joshua,

that there were two very clever parties in the legislater,
the democratic republikans and the national republikans;
and they are so, and very industrious, and try
to make things go on right; and I really believe, if the
confounded Jacksonites and Huntonites didn't bother
'em so, they'd make us a Governor, as quick as I could
make an ax handle. It is enough to do any body's
heart good to see how kind and obliging these democratic
republikans and national republikans are to each
other, and how each party tries to help the other along;
and its enough to make any body's blood boil to see
the Jacksonites and Huntonites, jest like the dog in the
manger, because they cant eat the hay themselves, snap
at these two clever parties the moment either of 'em
sets out to take a mouthful. I'll jest give you an instance
of the kindness that these two clever parties
show to each other. You know the constitution says
when we haven't any Governor the President of the
Sinnet must be Governor, and when we have n't any
President of the Sinnet, the Speaker of the House must
be Governor. So when Governor Lincoln died Mr.
Cutler was Governor for awhile, because he was last
year President of the Sinnet. Mr. Goodenow is a national
republikan, and when he was elected Speaker of
the House, the democratic republikans told him as there
was no President of the Sinnet elected yet, it belonged
to him to be Governor, and tried as hard as though he
had belonged to their own party, to encourage him to
go right into the council chamber and do the governor's
business. But the national republikans didn't dare to
let him go, for he was elected by only one majority, and
they said if he should leave the chair, it wouldn't be
five minutes before a Jacksonite would be whisked into
it, and then the two clever parties would all be up a
tree. Well, jest so twas in the Sinnet after Elder
Hall was elected president, only the bread was buttered
on tother side. Elder Hall is a democrat republikan,
and there was a great deal tougher scrabble to
elect him, than there was to choose the Speaker of the
House. But as soon as he was elected, the national
republikans went to him very kindly, and said, `Elder
Hall, by the provisions of the constitution you are now
fairly Governor of the State till another governor is
qualified. Dont be bashful about it, but please to walk
right into the Council chamber, and do the governor's
business.' But the democratic republikans said, that
would never do, for if he should, the Sinnet Board
would be capsized in an instant and the Huntonites
would rule the roast. So there was a pair of Governors
spoilt when they were more than half made, jest by the
michief of the Jacksonites and Huntonites. And the
consequence is, that Mr. Cutler has to keep doing the
Governor's business yet, whether he wants to or not,
and whether it is right for him to, or not. They say
the poor man is a good deal distressed about it, and has
sent to the great Judges of the Supreme Court to know
whether it's right for him to be Governor any longer
or not. If the Judges should say he mus 'nt be Governor
any longer, we shall be in a dreadful pickle.
Only think, no Governor, and no laws, but every body
do jest as they're a mind to. Well, if that should be
the case, I know one thing, that is, Bill Johnson will get
one good flogging for calling me a mean puppy and a
coward last summer; I've longed to give it to him ever
since; and if the Legislater don't make a governor this
winter, I shall come right home, and Bill must look out.
What a pity 'tis they should waste so much time trying
to make so many governors; for, if they should make
a dozen, we shouldn't want to use but one this year;
and it is thought if they had all clapt to and worked
upon one instead of working upon so many, they might
have had him done more than three weeks ago.