Poems consisting of Epistles and Epigrams, Satyrs, Epitaphs and Elogies, Songs and Sonnets With variety of other drolling Verses upon several Subjects. Composed by no body must know whom, and are to be had every body knows where, and for somebody knows what [by John Eliot] |
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The Author intending to write upon the Duke of
Buckingham, when he went to fetch the Queen,
prepared a new Ballad for the Fidlers, as might
hold them to sing between Dover and Callice.
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 | Poems consisting of Epistles and Epigrams, Satyrs, Epitaphs and Elogies, Songs and Sonnets |  |
83
The Author intending to write upon the Duke of Buckingham, when he went to fetch the Queen, prepared a new Ballad for the Fidlers, as might hold them to sing between Dover and Callice.
1
Now list you Lordings, and attendUnto a Ballad newly pend,
I took it up in Kent;
And if you ask who made the same,
The Author wish'd me say, his Name
Was honest Jack of Lent.
2
But ere I further pass along,Or let you hear more of my Song,
I wish the doors were lockt;
For if there be so base a Groom
As an informer in the room,
Your Fidlers may be knockt.
3
Nor is it rare to finde a KnaveAmongst a company so brave,
For Knaves are gallant things:
And they of late are grown so bold,
They dare appear in cloth of Gold,
Even in the presence of Kings.
84
4
But hit or miss I must declareThe speech at London, and elsewhere,
Concerning this designe.
Amongst the Drunkards it is said,
They hear her Dowry shall be paid
In nought but Claret wine.
5
The Country Clowns when they repairEither to Market, or to Fair,
No sooner get their pots,
But straight they swear the time is come
That England must be overrun
Between the French and Scots.
6
A holy Sister having hemd,And blown her nose will swear she dreamd,
Or else the Spirit tould her,
That they and all their holy seed
To Amsterdam must go and breed,
Ere they were twelve moneths older.
7
And might but Jack of Lent advise,Those dreams of hers should not prove lyes,
For as he greatly fears,
They will be prating night and day,
Till verily by Yea and Nay
They sets together by th'Ears.
85
8
The Reverend Bishops whisper too,That now they shall have much to do
With Fryers and with Monks.
And eke their Wives do greatly fear
Those learned men will mak't appear
They are canonical Puncks.
9
At Cambridge and at Oxford eke,They of this Match like Scholars speak
By Figures and by Tropes.
And as for the Supremacie,
The Body may King Charls his be,
But sure the Heads the Popes.
10
The learned in AstrologieThat wander up and down the Sky,
And there discourse with Stars,
Foresee that some of this brave rout
That now goes sound and bravely out,
Shall back return with Scars.
11
The civil Lawyer laughs in his sleeve,For he doth verily beleeve,
That after all these sports,
The Citizens will horn mad grow,
And their ill gotten gold will throw
About their Bawdy Courts.
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12
Such as in Musick spend their dayes,And study songs and roundelayes,
Begin to chear their throats;
For by some signes they do presage,
That this will prove a fiddling age,
Fitt for men of their coates.
13
Next such as doe Apollo court,And with the wanton Muses sport,
Proclaim the time is come,
That Gallants shall themselves address
To Masks, and playes, and wantonness,
More then to Fife or Drum.
14
But leaving Colledges and Schools,Unto those Clerks and learned Fools,
Let's through the Citty Range;
For there are Sconces made of horne,
Foresaw things long ere they were borne,
Which may be thought most strange.
15
The Major and Aldermen being met,And at a Custard closely set,
Each in his ranck and Order,
The Major a question doth propound,
And that unanswer'd did go round,
Till't came to the Recorder.
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16
For hee's the Citties Oracle,And which you'll think a miracle,
He hath their brains in keeping;
For when a cause should be decreed,
He cryes the bench are all agreed,
When most of them are sleeping.
17
A Shrieve at lower end o'th 'board,Cryes reverend sirs, heare me a word,
A bolt Ile onely shoot,
We shall have executions store
Against some gallants now gone o're,
Wherefore good brother look too't.
18
The rascall Sarjeants flearing stand,Wishing their Charter reach the Strand,
That they might there intrude:
But since they are not yet content,
I wish that it to Tiburn went,
So they might there conclude.
19
An Alderman both grave and wise,Cryes bretheren all let me advise,
Whilst wit is to be had,
That we some speeches may provide
To entertaine the Lady Bride,
Before all men run mad.
88
20
For by my faith, if men may guessOf greater matters by the less,
I pray let this suffice,
If we do on mens backs but look,
And then survay each trades mans book,
You'll swear few men are wise.
21
Some thrid bare Poet let us press,And for that day we will him dress,
At least in beaten sattin;
And he shall tell her from this Bench,
That though we understand no French,
At Pauls she shall hear Latin.
22
His Lordship all this while demurs,And counsell takes of his grave furs,
That stunck of Fox or Cunny;
And then he swels with high disdain,
Swearing the City in his reigne
Shall buy no wit with money.
23
For by this Sack I mean to drink;I would not have my Soveraigne think,
For twenty thousand crowns,
That I his Lord Lievetenant here,
And you my Bretheren should appear,
Such arrant witless Clowns.
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24
No no I have it in my head,Various conceits shall strike it dead,
And make proud Paris say,
That little London hath a Major,
Can entertain their Lady fair,
As well as ere did they.
25
Saint Georges Church shall be the place,Where first I mean to meet her grace,
And there Saint George shall be
Mounted upon a dapple gray,
And gaping he shall seem to say,
Welcome Saint Denis to me.
26
From thence wee'll march by two and twoAs we to Newgate use to do,
And to the Bridge convey her,
Where on the top of that old gate,
On which stands many a Rascals pate,
I mean to place a Player.
27
And he unto her grace shall cry,Vouchsafe to cast up one bright Eye,
To view these heads of Trayters.
Know thus we mean to use all those,
That to your highness shall prove foes,
For we to knaves are haters.
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28
Down Fishstreet hill a whale shall shoot,And meet her at the Bridges foot,
Out from her mouth so wide a
Shall Jonas peep and say, for fish,
As good as her dear heart can wish
She shall have hence each Fryday.
29
At Grace Church corner there shall standA troop of Graces hand in hand,
And they to her shall say
Your Grace of France is welcome hither,
'Tis merry when graces meet together,
Pray keep on your way.
30
At the Exchange shall placed be.In ugly shapes those Sisters three,
That gives to each his fate:
The Spanish Infanta shall stand by,
Wringing her hands she loud shall cry,
I doe repent to late.
31
There we a payr of gloves will give,And pray her highness long may live,
On her white hands to were them;
For though they have a Spanish sent,
The givers have no ill intent,
Wherefore she need not fear them.
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32
About the Standerd I think fit,Your Wives my bretheren all shall sit,
And eke my Lady Majoress
They shall present a Cup of Gold,
Saying if they may be so bold,
They'll drink to all at Paris.
33
Nor shall the Cundit now run ClarretPerhaps the French now care not for it,
They have at home so much;
No I will have that boy to piss,
No worse then purest Ipocriss,
Her Grace ne'er tasted such.
34
In Pauls Church yard we breath may takeFor they such tedious speeches make,
Will tyre any horse;
And there I'le put her Grace in minde,
To cast her princely Eye behinde,
And view Saint Pauls old Cross.
35
Our Sarjaents there shall go their waie,And for us at the devill stay,
I mean at Temple Bar;
There we of her our leaves will take,
And swear 'twas for king Charls his sake
We came with her so far.
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36
Thus fearing I have tyr'd the EarsBoth of the Duke and all these Peers,
I'll be no more uncivil;
But leave the Major and both the Shrieves;
With Sarjeants hanging on their sleeves
For this time at the Devil.
| Poems consisting of Epistles and Epigrams, Satyrs, Epitaphs and Elogies, Songs and Sonnets | |