University of Virginia Library

SCENE A Garden to Vittoria's Appartments.
Enter Ludovico, Antonio, Gasparo.
Lud.
Banisht!

Ant.
It griev'd me much to hear the Sentence.

Lud.
Ha, ha!—O Democritus! thy Gods,
That manage this mad World, Courtly Rewards
And Punishments—
This 'tis to have great Enemies.

Gasp.
You term those Enemies are Men of Princely Rank.

Lud.
Oh! I pray for 'em—
The violent Thunder is ador'd by those
Are dash'd in pieces by it.

Ant.
Come my Lord,
Y'are justly doom'd; look but a little back
Into your former Life; you have in three Years
Ruin'd the noblest Earldoms—

Gasp.
Your Followers have swallow'd you like Mummy—

Ant.
One Citizen
Is Lord of two fair Mannors
Only for Caveaire.

Gasp.
Those Noblemen,
Who were invited to your prodigal Feasts
(Wherein the Phœnix scarce cou'd 'scape your Throats)
Laugh at your Misery—

Ant.
Jest upon you;
And say you were begotten in an Earthquake,
You have ruin'd such fair Lordships.

Lud.
Very good,
This Well goes with two Buckets; I must tend
The pouring out of either.

Gasp.
Worse than this;
You have acted certain Murders here in Rome,
Bloody and full of Horror!

Lud.
So,
I wonder then some of your great Men escape
This Banishment. There's Paulo Giordiano, Ursini
The Duke of Brachiano, now in Rome,
By Rev'ling Visits seek to prostitute
The Honour of Vittoria on pretence
To raise her ruin'd Family, and make
Her Husband a great Man.

Gasp.
Judge Charitably; 'tis generous in Him.

Lud.
Generous?

Ant.
Come, bear a Manly Patience.

Lud.
I'le make Italian cut Works in their Skinns,
If ever I return.

Gasp.
O Sir!

Lud.
I am Patient—Patient!—
I've seen some ready to be Executed
Give pleasant Looks, and Money to their Hangman.

Ant.
Fare you well my Lord;
We shall find time I doubt not, to get
Your Banishment Repeal'd.

Lud.
I am ever bound to you:
This is the Worlds Alms (pray make use of it.)
Great Men sell Sheep thus to be cut in pieces,
When first they have shorn 'em bare and sold their Fleeces.

[Exeunt.
Enter Brachiano, Flamineo, Vittoria; (Flamin. with a dark Lanthorn.)
Bra.
The best of Rest t'ye.

Vitt.
To my Lord Brachiano
The best of Welcome: More Lights attend the Duke.

Bra.
Flamineo!

Fla.
My Lord.

Bra.
Quite lost Flamineo!

Fla.
Pursue your Noble Wishes, I am prompt
As Lightning to your Service: O my Lord,
This fair Vittoria here, my happy Sister,
Shall give you present Audience: Gentlemen,
Let the Chariot go on: It is his Highness Pleasure
You put out all the Lights, and so depart.

Bra.
Are we so Happy?

Fla.
'T can't be otherwise,
I've dealt already with her Waiting Woman,
Zanche the Moor, and she is wondrous proud,
To be the Agent for so high a Spirit.

Bra.
But still her Jealous Husband—

Fla.
Her Jealous Husband, hang him—
Shroud you within this Banquetting House good my Lord.
Some Trick must now be thought on to divide
This Brother-in Law, from his fair Bedfellow.

Bra.
O should she fail to come—

[Enter Camillo.
Fla.
I must not have your Lordship thus desponding,
Away, away my Lord, see here he comes; this Fellow,
By his Apparel and Movement,
Some Men would judge a Politician.
—How now Brother; travelling to Bed to your kind Wife?

Cam.
I assure you Brother, No my Voyage lies
More Northerly in a far colder Clime.

Cam.
The Duke, your Master Visits me—I thank him.

Fla.
I hope you do not think—

Cam.
I have observ'd him.

Fla.
Will you be an Ass,
Spight of your Aristotle? Or a Cuckold
Contrary to your Ephemerides?

Cam.
Pew, mew, Sir tell not me
Of Planets, nor Ephemerides;
A Man may be made a Cuckold in the Day-time,
When the Stars Eyes are out.

Fla.
Sir, Fare you well;
I do Commit you to your pittiful Pillow
Stufft with Horn Shaveings.

Cam.
Brother—

Fla.
Hope refuse me,
Might I advise you now, your only Course
Were to lock up your Wife.

Cam.
'Twere very good.

Fla.
And so shall you be certain in one Fortnight
Despight of Chastity or Innocence to be Cuckolded,
Which yet is in Suspence.

Cam.
Come Sir, you know not where my Night-Cap wrings me.

Fla.
What you are Jealous then?
See she comes—What reason have you to be
Enter Vittoria.
Jealous of this Creature—Be wise I'le make you
Friends, and you shall to Bed together: Marry
Look you, it shall not be of your seeking, do you stand
Upon that by any means—Walk a loof; I would
Not have you be seen in it—Sister, my
Lord attends you in the Banquetting House—
[Aside to Vitt.
Your Husband is wondrous Discontented.

[Aloud.
Vitt.
I did nothing to displease him.

Fla.
I must now seemingly fall out with you,
[Aside.
And shall a Gentleman so well Descended as
[Aloud
Camillo—a Paltry Slave, that within these
[Aside.
Two years rode with the Duke's Carriages.

Cam.
Now he begins to tickle her.

Fla.
An excellent Scholar—

Cam.
He'll make her know what's in me.

Fla.
Come, my Lord attends; thou shalt to my Lord.

Cam.
Now he comes to't.

Fla.
With a Relish as Curious as a Vintner going to
Turning to Camillo.
Tast new Wine: I am opening your case
Hard.

Cam.
A virtuous Brother-in-Law on my Credit!

Fla.
Thou shalt lie on a Bed stuff't with Turtles
Feathers, swoon in Perfumes, stifled in
Roses—shall meet him, 'tis fixt.

Vitt.
Yes I will meet him, but for other Ends
[Aside.
Than their vile Purposes.

Fla.

I have almost wrought her to't, I find her Coming—
But might I advise you now, for this Night I would not Lodge
with Her—I would cross her Humour, to make her more humble.

Cam.

Shall I, shall I?

Fla.

It will shew in you Supremacy of Judgment.

Cam.

True; a Mind elevated above the tumultuary Opinion.

Fla.

Right; you are the Adamant shall draw her to you, tho'
you keep at Distance.

Cam.

A Philosophical Reason!

Fla.

Walk by her Negligently, of the Quality fashion; and
tell her you will visit her at the end of the Progress.

Cam.

Vittoria—I cannot be induced, or, as a Man would say,
incited,

Vitt.

To what Sir?

Cam.

To sleep with you to Night—

Fla.

But d'ye hear—I shall have you steal to her for all
this about Midnight.

Cam.

Think you so? Why look you Brother, because you shall
find me stick to my Authority, take my Keys, look me fast into
my Chamber, and so you shall be sure of me.

Fla.

In troth and so I will: I'le be your Goaler for once. But
have you ne'er a false Door?

Cam.

tell me to Morrow how scurvily she takes my unkind
parting.

Fla.
I will?

Cam.
I will use these tricks often;

Fla.
Do, Do, Do, Do.
So now you are safe, Ha, ha, ha.

Come Sister, Darkness hides your Blushes; my Lord,
my Lord,

[Enter Brachiano.
Bra.
Believe me I could wish time would stand still,
And never end this Interview—
Let me into your Bosom, dearest Charmer,
Pour out instead of Eloquence, my Passion?
Loose me not Madam, for if you forgoe
Me, I'me lost indeed.

Vitt.
Sir in way of Charity I wish you at Heart's ease.

Bra.
You are a sweet Physician.

Vitt.
Sure deadly Cruelties in Ladies,
Are as to Doctors many Funerals;
It takes away their Credit.

Bra.
Excellent Creature,
We call the Cruel, Fair; what Name for you,
That are so Merciful?

Zan.
See now they Close.

Fla.
I apprehend you;
When Principals engage, 'tis scandalous
For Seconds to be Idle.

Vitt.
You call'd me your Physician, and I make
This Visit to prescribe your Grief a Cure;
A certain speedy Cure.

Bra.
That's double Charity.

Vitt.
'Tis Resolutely at once to quench and stifle
This hopeless Passion.

Bra.
That's too rough a Method,
And suits not with my Constitution.
These Minutes are too Precious—

Vitt.
Sir, I know their Value,
And shall improve 'em to our mutual Benefit;
'Twas that I purpos'd in this Interview,
We now are wander'd to the brink of Ruin,
And must turn short, or perish.

Bra.
Where's the Danger?

Vitt.
It was my Lot
To be high born and bred, and then reduc'd
To fortune's Ebb, and (to compleat my Woes)
Made Hymen's Martyr, Wedded to Aversion;
Yet still the Name of Husband's Venerable;
My Vow was Sacred, and let Hope forsake me
When first—

Bra.
Hold; 'twas no Match,
And I pronounce it void; unnatural Contracts
Dissolve themselves.

[Enter Cornelia observing them at a Distance.
Vitt.
Yours was at least Religious;
You have a Princess, Sir, the Pride of Nature,
And Paradise of Vertues; worth your Prizing
If Monarch of the World; and Sir, this Charmer,
Your Lover, and almost your Worshipper.

Cor.
My fears are fall'n upon me! Oh my Heart,
My Son, their Pandar?

Vitt.
Beware my Lord! Orphans and Widows cries,
Defrauded Labour's starving Sighs are loud;
But none, to draw down Vengeance from Above,
No! None like the Complaints of injur'd Love.

Bra.
You have both said and answer'd, call'd her Wife
And Mine.

Vitt.
So are your Dukedoms, Sir—I own these Beauties
Mean as my Fortune, yet above the Purchase
Of Crowns and Scepters; brighter too than they,
While deck't with Innocence—That Jewel lost
The Mountain Nymph, that dresses at a Fountain
Her inn'cent Head with Daisies, wou'd out-shine me
Blazing with Diamonds.

[Cornelia comes near to 'em.
Bra.
Consent, and who shall dare to call't a Crime?

Vitt.
Were Censure aw'd, what Troops can you Command,
What Guards to silence the Accuser here?
The rev'ling gaudy Scene in time will change,
Furies succeed the flatt'ring Cupid's fled,
And howling Horrour haunt the guilty Bed.

Bra.
Phantoms and Dreams! Awake and find your self
Lodg'd in his powerful Arms, that can protect you
From all the Fevers of a Jealous Husband,
From the poor envy of our Phlegmatick Dutchess;
I'le seat you above Law, and above Scandal:
Give to your Thoughts Invention of Delights,
And the Fruition: Nor shall Affairs of State
Divide me longer from you, than due Care
To keep you great; you shall to me at once
Be Dukedom, Health, Wife, Children, Friends and all.

Corn.
Wo to light Hearts, they still fore-run our Fall.

Fla.
Ha! What fury rais'd thee up? Away, away.

Corn.
What makes you here my Lord, at this dead time of Night?
Never dropt Mildew on Flow'r here, till now.

Fla.
I pray will you to Bed then, least you be Blasted.

Corn.
O that this fair Garden
Had with all poisned Herbs of Thessaly
At first been Planted, made a Nursery
For Witchcraft, rather than a Burial Plat
For both your Honours.

Vitt.
Dearest Mother hear me.

Corn.
O thou dost make my Brow bend down to Earth,
Sooner than Nature—
Where is thy Dutchess now Adulterous Duke?
Thou little dream'st shee's come this Night to Rome.

Fla.
Ha! Come to Rome.

Vitt.
The Dutchess!

Bra.
Sh'ad been better—

Cor.
The Lives of Princes should like Dials move,
Whose Regular Example is so strong,
They make the Times by them go right or wrong.

Fla.
So—have you done?

Cor.
Unfortunate Camillo?

Vitt.
Yet, Madam hear me—

[Kneeling.
Cor.
I will joyn with thee
To the most woful end e'er Mother kneel'd;
If thou dishonour once thy Husband's Bed,
Be thy Life short; as are the Funeral Tears
Of Great Men's Heirs.

Bra.
She Raves, the old Lady's Distracted.

Fla.
This 'tis for ancient Folks to keep ill Hours.

Cor.
Be your Love's every Kiss a Scorpion;
May'st thou be envy'd, during his short Breath,
To be the more despis'd when he is dead.

Vitt.
Mistaken Zeal, but 'tis a Parent's Care,
And Duty bids me wait for her Conviction;
Tho' mists of Errour Innocence may shroud,
Truth and the Sun shine brighter from a Cloud.

[Ex. Vitt.
[Manent Flam. Cornel.
Fla.
Are you out of your Wits?
My Lord I'le fetch her back again.

Bra.
No, I'le to Bed—
Send Doctor Julio to me instantly,
The Poysoning Doctor Julio.
Uncharitable Woman, thy rash Tongue
Has rais'd a dreadful and prodigious Storm,
Be thou the cause of all ensuing Harm.

[Ex. Bra.
Fla.
Now, you that stand so much upon your Honour,
Is this a fitting time of Night think you
To send a Duke home without Attendance?
I would fain know where lies the Mass of Wealth
Which you have hoarded for my Maintenance,
That I may bear my State above the Level
Of my Lord's Stirrup.

Cor.
What; because we're poor,
Must we be vicious?

Fla.
Pray what Means have you,
To keep me from the Gallies, or the Gallows?
My Father prov'd himself a Gentleman,
Sold all his Lands, and like a fort'nate Father dy'd
Before the Money was spent—You brought me up
At Padua, I confess;
Thence to the Duke's Service,
I visited the Court—And shall I,
Having a Path so open and so free
To my Preferment, still retain your Milk
In my pale Forehead?

Cor.
O that I ne'er had born thee!

Fla.
So would I;
I wou'd the common'st Courtezan in Rome,
Had been my Mother, rather than thy self:
Nature is very pitiful to Whores,
In giving them few Children,
And those few Plurality of Fathers;
They are sure they shall not want—go, go,
Complain to my great Lord Cardinal,
It may be he will justify the Act.

Cor.
Misery of Miseries!

[Exit.
Fla.
The Dutchess come to Town; I like not that;
I am engag'd in Mischief, and must go on.

[Exit.