University of Virginia Library

Epilogue spoken by Mr. Bowen.

Good People! save the Body of our Play,
From those who to dissect it Yonder stay;
Like Surgeons on an Execution day.
Ev'n e're it dyes they'll mawl it, I'm afraid;
And you'd think't hard, like me, in such a dread,
To be dissected, e're you're hang'd, and dead.
The fear of this our trembling Scribbler kills;
I dare say they've no need to take my Pills.
Pray spare 'em: Learn of Vulcan to forgive;
Or else, egad, few Plays or Wives will live.
Ev'n he, methinks, too late his wrath did smother,
Here, Wives and Husbands keep not such a pother,
But fairly strive t'out-Cuckold one another.
Why, shou'd all dye that follow th'Occupation,
Oonds! 'twere the way to cut off half the Nation.
Besides, Horns are not seen; shou'd they appear,
Gadsooks, yon Place wou'd ev'n outhorn Horn-Fair.
You'd see your Surly Dons toss their Bull's Feathers,
And your tame poor Contented bleat like Weathers.
Lewd rakish Husbands, butt with Goatish Horns,
And half-made Cuckolds with an Unicorn's.
Now as all have to Cuckoldry a Call,
So will the Curse of scribling on you fall;
'E gad these Times make Poets of us all.
Then do not damn your Brothers of the quill;
To be reveng'd, there's hope you'll write as ill.
For nere were seen more Scribes, yet less good writing,
As there nere were more Soldiers, yet less Fighting.
Both can do nothing if they want supplies.
Then aid us; and our League its neighbouring Foes defies;
Tho they brib'd lately one of our Allies.
Sure you'd not have us, for want of due pittance,
Like Nicompoops sneak to them for admittance.
No; prompt by you our fears and dangers cease,
Here firm, tho Wealth decay, and Foes increase,
We'll bravely tug for Liberty and Peace.