University of Virginia Library

ADDRESS OF The Devil, To the United Irishmen.

United Irishmen. This description of Republicans began about the time of this publication to make a very conspicuous figure in the politics of the United States. Composed of murderers ejected from Ireland, or of villains who had there united in the most murderous purposes, they advanced to the attack of the Commonwealth with all that outrageous daring and ferocity, which may be supposed to characterize such wretches.

The pen of the Poet was very soon drawn against them, and this apt harangue of their patron and founder, the devil, with the annexed reply written, and published in the Gazette of the United States. The Editor of Porcupine's Gazette sallied forth upon them at the same time with his accustomed spirit, and, aided by humbler efforts, was enabled completely to thwart the designs of those sanguinary assassins. The persons who had distinguished themselves on this occasion, were repeatedly assailed with incendiary letters. Soon followed clubs, pistols and swords. Their preservation was little less than miraculous. The public surveyed their perils with apathy, and when one of the ruffians had been sentenced to a fine of fifty dollars for forcible entry, with intent to kill, a Jacobin Governor stood ready to remit the sentence, as he did in another case of conviction for assault and battery.

Such were the rewards of men, who had preserved at least the City, from inevitable massacre, conflagration and pillage.

[_]

At a late nocturnal cabal of United Irishmen, a curious circumstance took place, which, for a moment, threw the whole assembly into confusion. The cavern, wherein they had been accustomed to mature their deeds of darkness, was forsaken during the late season of trepidation and chastisement. On their return to this unhallowed den, the most shocking derangement appeared in every corner; initiatory apparatus lay in fragments scattered


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over the earthen floor; the hieroglyphic records of the clan were torn and defaced; and every thing exhibited some marks of having been visited by an inhabitant of the lower regions. While they were busied in restoring order to the infernal apartment, a blue misty light was seen hovering over the sink which was used as a repository of filth, and in a few minutes the whole place was filled with a sulphureous and suffocating vapour. The astonishment and alarm excited on this occasion can be very readily imagined, but it is not easy to picture the confusion which succeeded the appearance of Satan himself, issuing from the flame. The cloven hoosed monarch advanced into the centre of the assembly, and by the familiarity of his demeanor, and the persuasive melody of his tongue, soon dissipated the terror by which the poor wretches had been so unmercifully shaken. In one hand he held a number of halters, like strings of wampum, in the other a scroll containing the following talk, which he delivered to the chuckling fraternity with great energy of emphasis, and propriety of action; delivering a halter at every pause.

Brothers,
Incarnate Patriots, Guillotins,
Reformers, Democrats and Jacobins,
Whether in Brothel or in Limbo cramm'd,
Old sinning miscreants, “damn'd or to be damn'd,”
This string of friendship to your hopes I send,
Ere Catch's cordage brings you to an end.
Gives a halter.

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Brothers,
Relax not in the good old cause;
Down with the Constitution, burn the Laws;
Dissolve this paradox, for who can be,
At once, to Law a shackled slave, and free.
Sure he, who made you the Creation's pride,
A will dispensed, and sense that will to guide;
Made you free agents on this nether sphere,
With Hell to hope for, and with Heaven to fear.
And meant no power, but Nature, should restrain
The blissful wanderings of the human brain.
A halter.
Brothers,
Be bold, be resolute; what e'er
Ye will to do, that do and never fear.
Seek your own good, ask nothing from the wise,
In man's own strength, man's own protection lies.
All men are equal: not a lowly hind,
The shivering object of the winter's wind;
But justly claims, in common right with all,
An equal portion of this teeming ball:
His birthright 'tis, incorp'rate with his breath,
And yields to nothing, 'till it yields to death.
A halter.
Brothers,
And yet full many a villain lives,
Unfed, amid the stores that Nature gives,
Without one sod to yield a kind repast,
And scarce allow'd his lubber's length at last.
A halter.

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Brothers,
Arouse; your long lost rights regain;
Survey the Earth, and measure out the Main;
Fire, light and air with curious skill divide,
Then sit ye down and rest ye satisfied.
A halter.
Brothers,
Be bloody; let no tears controul,
Nor mawkish pity hang about your soul.
When beauty pleads, tho' as the morning fair,
Tho' angel sweetness breathes thro' all her pray'r,
Tho' e'en with love, her panting bosom swells,
Be deaf as adders to the tale she tells;
And, in return for many a gentle word,
Such mercy give as daggers' points afford.
A halter.
Brothers,
The task unnumber'd pains await,
Your toils are many, and your dangers great,
But fear not you, whatever ills betide.
I am your friend, your patron and your guide.
A halter.