The Poetical Works of Thomas Moore Collected by Himself. In Ten Volumes |
 | I, II. |
| III, IV. |
| V. |
| VI, VII. |
 | VIII, IX. |
|
|
|
NEW CREATION OF PEERS.
|
| 1. |
| 2. |
|
|
|
| X. |
 | The Poetical Works of Thomas Moore |  |
243
NEW CREATION OF PEERS.
BATCH THE FIRST.
“His 'prentice han’
He tried on man,
And then he made the lasses.”
He tried on man,
And then he made the lasses.”
1827.
“And now,” quoth the Minister, (eas'd of his panics,
And ripe for each pastime the summer affords,)
“Having had our full swing at destroying mechanics,
“By way of set-off, let us make a few Lords.
And ripe for each pastime the summer affords,)
“Having had our full swing at destroying mechanics,
“By way of set-off, let us make a few Lords.
“'Tis pleasant—while nothing but mercantile fractures,
“Some simple, some compound, is dinn'd in our ears—
“To think that, though robb'd of all coarse manufactures,
“We still have our fine manufacture of Peers;—
“Some simple, some compound, is dinn'd in our ears—
“To think that, though robb'd of all coarse manufactures,
“We still have our fine manufacture of Peers;—
“Those Gobelin productions, which Kings take a pride
“In engrossing the whole fabrication and trade of;
“Choice tapestry things, very grand on one side,
“But showing, on t'other, what rags they are made of.”
“In engrossing the whole fabrication and trade of;
244
“But showing, on t'other, what rags they are made of.”
The plan being fix'd, raw material was sought,—
No matter how middling, if Tory the creed be;
And first, to begin with, Squire W---, 'twas thought,
For a Lord was as raw a material as need be.
No matter how middling, if Tory the creed be;
And first, to begin with, Squire W---, 'twas thought,
For a Lord was as raw a material as need be.
Next came, with his penchant for painting and pelf,
The tasteful Sir Charles , so renown'd, far and near,
For purchasing pictures, and selling himself—
And both (as the public well knows) very dear.
The tasteful Sir Charles , so renown'd, far and near,
For purchasing pictures, and selling himself—
And both (as the public well knows) very dear.
Beside him Sir John comes, with equal éclat, in;—
Stand forth, chosen pair, while for titles we measure ye;
Both connoisseur baronets, both fond of drawing,
Sir John, after nature, Sir Charles, on the Treasury.
Stand forth, chosen pair, while for titles we measure ye;
Both connoisseur baronets, both fond of drawing,
Sir John, after nature, Sir Charles, on the Treasury.
245
But, bless us!—behold a new candidate come—
In his hand he upholds a prescription, new written;
He poiseth a pill-box 'twixt finger and thumb,
And he asketh a seat 'mong the Peers of Great Britain!!
In his hand he upholds a prescription, new written;
He poiseth a pill-box 'twixt finger and thumb,
And he asketh a seat 'mong the Peers of Great Britain!!
“Forbid it,” cried Jenky, “ye Viscounts, ye Earls!—
“Oh Rank, how thy glories would fall disenchanted,
“If coronets glisten'd with pills 'stead of pearls,
“And the strawberry-leaves were by rhubarb supplanted!
“Oh Rank, how thy glories would fall disenchanted,
“If coronets glisten'd with pills 'stead of pearls,
“And the strawberry-leaves were by rhubarb supplanted!
“No—ask it not, ask it not, dear Doctor H*lf*rd—
“If nought but a Peerage can gladden thy life,
“And young Master H*lf*rd as yet is too small for't,
“Sweet Doctor, we'll make a she Peer of thy wife.
“If nought but a Peerage can gladden thy life,
“And young Master H*lf*rd as yet is too small for't,
“Sweet Doctor, we'll make a she Peer of thy wife.
“Next to bearing a coronet on our own brows,
“Is to bask in its light from the brows of another;
“And grandeur o'er thee shall reflect from thy spouse,
“As o'er V---y F*tz---d 'twill shine through his mother.”
“Is to bask in its light from the brows of another;
246
“As o'er V---y F*tz---d 'twill shine through his mother.”
Thus ended the First Batch—and Jenky, much tir'd
(It being no joke to make Lords by the heap),
Took a large dram of ether—the same that inspir'd
His speech 'gainst the Papists—and pros'd off to sleep.
(It being no joke to make Lords by the heap),
Took a large dram of ether—the same that inspir'd
His speech 'gainst the Papists—and pros'd off to sleep.
| The Poetical Works of Thomas Moore | |