All the workes of Iohn Taylor the Water-Poet Being Sixty and three in Number. Collected into one Volume by the Author [i.e. John Taylor]: With sundry new Additions, corrected, reuised, and newly Imprinted |
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A Uoyage in a Paper-boat from London to Quinborough.
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 | All the workes of Iohn Taylor the Water-Poet |  |
A Uoyage in a Paper-boat from London to Quinborough.
I therefore to conclude this much will noteHow I of Paper lately made a Boat,
And how informe of Paper I did row
From London vnto Quinborough Ile show.
I and a Vintner (Roger Bird by name)
(A man whom Fortune neuer yet could tame)
Tooke ship vpon the vigill of Saint Iames
And boldly ventur'd downe the Riuer Thames,
Lauing and cutting through each raging billow,
(In such a Boat which neuer had a fellow)
Hauing no kinde of mettall or no wood
To helpe vs eyther in our Ebbe or Flood:
For as our boat was paper so our Oares
Were Stock-fish, caught neere to the Island shores.
Driuing 'twixt Essex Calues, and sheepe of Kent:
Our Boat a female vessell gan to leake
Being as female vessels are, most weake,
Yet was shee able which did greeue me sore,
To drowne Hodge Bird and I and forty more.
The water to the Paper being got,
In one halfe houre our boat began to rot:
The Thames (most lib'rall) fild her to the halues,
Whilst Hodge and I sate liquor'd to the calues.
In which extremity I thought it fit
To put in vse a stratagem of wit,
Which was, eight Bullocks bladders we had bought
Puft stifly full with wind, bound fast and tought.
Which on our Boat within the Tide we ty'de,
Of each side foure, vpon the outward side.
The water still rose higher by degrees.
In three miles going, almost to our knees,
Our rotten bottome all to tatters sell,
And left our boat as bottomlesse as Hell.
And had not bladders borne vs stifly vp,
We there had tasted of deaths fatall cup.
And now (to make some sport) Ile make it knowne
By whose strong breath my bladders all were blown.
One by a cheuerell conscienc'd Vsurer,
Another by a drunken Bag piper,
The third a Whore, the fourth a Pander blew,
The fift a Cutpurse, of the Cursed crew,
The sixt, a post-knight that for fiue groats gaine
Would sweare & for foure groats forsweare't againe.
The seauenth was an Informer, one that can
By informations begger any man.
The eight was blowne vp by a swearing Royster,
That would cut throats as soone as eate an Oyster.
We had more winds then the Compasse, for we had eight seuerall winds in our bladders, and the 32 of the Compasse in all 40.
And with these wicked winds encompass'd round,
For why such breaths as those it fortunes euer,
They end with hanging, but with drowning neuer;
And sure the bladders bore vs vp so tight,
As if they had said, Gallowes claime thy right.
This was the cause that made vs seeke about,
To finde these light Tiburnian vapours out.
We could haue had of honest men good store,
As Watermen, and Smiths, and many more,
But that we knew it must be hanging breath,
That must preserue vs from a drowning death.
Yet much we fear'd the graues our end would be
Before we could the Towne of Grauesend see:
Our boat drunke deepely with her dropsie thirst,
And quaft as if she would her bladders burst,
Whilst we within fixe inches of the brim
(Full of salt water) downe (halfe sunck) did swim.
Thousands of people all the shores did hide,
And thousands more did meet vs in the tide
With Scullers, Oares, with ship boats, & with Barges
To gaze on vs, they put themselues to charges.
Before we could the Towne of Grauesend see:
Our boat drunke deepely with her dropsie thirst,
And quaft as if she would her bladders burst,
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(Full of salt water) downe (halfe sunck) did swim.
Thousands of people all the shores did hide,
And thousands more did meet vs in the tide
With Scullers, Oares, with ship boats, & with Barges
To gaze on vs, they put themselues to charges.
Thus did we driue, and driue the time away,
Till pitchy night had driuen away the day:
The Sun vnto the vnder world was fled:
The Moone was loath to rise, and kept her bed,
The Starres did twinckle, but the Ebon clouds
Their light, our sight, obscures and ouershrowds.
The tossing billowes made our boat to caper,
Our paper forme scarce being forme of paper,
The water foure mile broad, no Oares, to row,
Night darke, and where we were we did not know.
And thus 'twixt doubt and feare, hope and despaire
I fell to worke, and Roger Bird to prayer.
And as the surges vp and downe did heaue vs,
He cry'd most feruently, good Lord receiue vs.
I pray'd as much, but I did worke and pray,
And he did all he could to pray and play.
Thus three houres darkeling I did puzzell and toile
Sows'd and well pickl'd, chafe and muzzell & moile,
Drench'd with the swassing waues, & stew'd in sweat
Scarce able with a cane our boat to set,
At last (by Gods great mercy and his might)
The morning gan to chase away the night.
Aurora made vs soone perceiue and see
We were three miles below the Towne of Lee.
And as the morning more end more did cleare,
The sight of Quinborogh castle did appeare.
That was the famous monumentall marke,
To which we striu'd to bring our rotten barke:
The onely ayme of our intents and scope,
The anker that brought Roger to the Hope.
Till pitchy night had driuen away the day:
The Sun vnto the vnder world was fled:
The Moone was loath to rise, and kept her bed,
The Starres did twinckle, but the Ebon clouds
Their light, our sight, obscures and ouershrowds.
The tossing billowes made our boat to caper,
Our paper forme scarce being forme of paper,
The water foure mile broad, no Oares, to row,
Night darke, and where we were we did not know.
And thus 'twixt doubt and feare, hope and despaire
I fell to worke, and Roger Bird to prayer.
And as the surges vp and downe did heaue vs,
He cry'd most feruently, good Lord receiue vs.
I pray'd as much, but I did worke and pray,
And he did all he could to pray and play.
Thus three houres darkeling I did puzzell and toile
Sows'd and well pickl'd, chafe and muzzell & moile,
Drench'd with the swassing waues, & stew'd in sweat
Scarce able with a cane our boat to set,
At last (by Gods great mercy and his might)
The morning gan to chase away the night.
Aurora made vs soone perceiue and see
We were three miles below the Towne of Lee.
And as the morning more end more did cleare,
The sight of Quinborogh castle did appeare.
That was the famous monumentall marke,
To which we striu'd to bring our rotten barke:
The onely ayme of our intents and scope,
The anker that brought Roger to the Hope.
Thus we from Saturday at euening Tide,
Till Monday morne, did on the water bide,
In rotten paper and in boysterous weather,
Darke nights, through wet, and toyled altogether.
But being come to Quinborough and aland,
I tooke my fellow Roger by the hand,
And both of vs ere we two steps did goe
Gaue thankes to God that had preseru'd vs so:
Confessing that his mercy vs protected
When as we least deseru'd, and lesse expected.
The Maior of Quinborough in loue affords
To entertaine vs, as we had beene Lords;
It is a yearely feast kept by the Maior,
And thousand people thither doth repaire,
From Townes and Villages that's neere about,
And 'twas our lucke to come in all this rout.
I'th'street, Bread, Beere, and Oysters is their meat,
Which freely, friendly, shot-free all doe eat.
But Hodge and I were men of ranck and note,
We to the Maior gaue our aduenturous boat;
The which (to glorifie that Towne of Kent)
He meant to hang vp for a monument.
He to his house inuited vs to dine,
Where we had cheare on cheare, and wine on wine,
And drinke, and fill, and drinke, and drinke and fill,
With welcome vpon welcome, welcome still.
Till Monday morne, did on the water bide,
In rotten paper and in boysterous weather,
Darke nights, through wet, and toyled altogether.
But being come to Quinborough and aland,
I tooke my fellow Roger by the hand,
And both of vs ere we two steps did goe
Gaue thankes to God that had preseru'd vs so:
Confessing that his mercy vs protected
When as we least deseru'd, and lesse expected.
The Maior of Quinborough in loue affords
To entertaine vs, as we had beene Lords;
It is a yearely feast kept by the Maior,
And thousand people thither doth repaire,
From Townes and Villages that's neere about,
And 'twas our lucke to come in all this rout.
I'th'street, Bread, Beere, and Oysters is their meat,
Which freely, friendly, shot-free all doe eat.
But Hodge and I were men of ranck and note,
We to the Maior gaue our aduenturous boat;
The which (to glorifie that Towne of Kent)
He meant to hang vp for a monument.
He to his house inuited vs to dine,
Where we had cheare on cheare, and wine on wine,
And drinke, and fill, and drinke, and drinke and fill,
With welcome vpon welcome, welcome still.
But whilst we at our dinners thus were merry,
The Country people tore our tatter'd wherry
In mammocks peecemeale in a thousand scraps,
Wearing the reliques in their hats and caps.
That neuer traytors corps could more be scatter'd
By greedy Rauens, then our poore boat was tatter'd;
Which when the Maior did know, he presently
Tooke patient what he could not remedie.
The next day we with thankes left Quinbroghs coast
And hied vs home on horse-backe all in post.
Thus Master Birds strange voyage was begun,
With greater danger was his mony won.
And those that doe his coine from him detaine
(Which he did win with perill and much paine)
Let them not thinke that e're 'twill doe them good,
But eate their marrow and consume their blood.
The worme of conscience gnaw them euery day
That haue the meanes, and not the will to pay.
Those that are poore, and cannot, let them be
Both from the debt and malediction free.
The Country people tore our tatter'd wherry
In mammocks peecemeale in a thousand scraps,
Wearing the reliques in their hats and caps.
That neuer traytors corps could more be scatter'd
By greedy Rauens, then our poore boat was tatter'd;
Which when the Maior did know, he presently
Tooke patient what he could not remedie.
The next day we with thankes left Quinbroghs coast
And hied vs home on horse-backe all in post.
Thus Master Birds strange voyage was begun,
With greater danger was his mony won.
And those that doe his coine from him detaine
(Which he did win with perill and much paine)
Let them not thinke that e're 'twill doe them good,
But eate their marrow and consume their blood.
The worme of conscience gnaw them euery day
That haue the meanes, and not the will to pay.
Those that are poore, and cannot, let them be
Both from the debt and malediction free.
Thus (I in part) what Hemp-seed is haue showne.
Cloth, ropes, rags, paper, poorely is made knowne:
How it maintaines each kingdome, state and trade,
And how in paper we a voyage made.
I therefore to conclude, thinke not amisse
To write something of Thames, or Thamasis,
Cloth, ropes, rags, paper, poorely is made knowne:
How it maintaines each kingdome, state and trade,
And how in paper we a voyage made.
I therefore to conclude, thinke not amisse
To write something of Thames, or Thamasis,
Loyre, Moldoue, Tyber, Albia, Seyne, Meander,
Hidaspes, Jndus, Jnachus, Tanaies,
(Our Thames true praise is sarre beyond their praise)
Great Euphrates, Iordane, Nilus, Ganges, Poe,
Tagus and Tygris, Thames doth farre out-goe.
Danubia, Jster, Xanthus, Lisus, Rhrine,
Wey, Seuerne, Auon, Medway, Isis, Tine,
Dee, Ouze, Trent, Humber, Eske, Tweed, Annan, Tay,
Firth (that braue Demy-ocean) Clide, Dun, Spay,
All these are great in fames, and great in names,
But great'st in goodnesse is the riuer Thames,
From whose Diurnall and Nocturnall flood
Millions of soules haue fewell cloathes and food;
Which from twelue houres to twelue doth still succeed,
Hundreds, & thousands both to cloath & feed.
Of watermen, their seruants, children, wiues,
It doth maintaine neere twenty thousand liues.
I can as quickly number all the starres,
As reckon all things in particulars:
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Proceeds from this most matchlesse, famous Riuer.
And therefore 'tis great pirty, shelfe or sand
From the forgetfull and ingratefull land,
Should it's cleare chrystall entrailes vilefy,
Or soyle such purenesse with impurity.
What doth it doe, but serues our full contents,
Brings food, and for it takes our excrements,
Yeelds vs all plenty, worthy of regard
And dirt and mucke we giue it for reward?
In art, haue fabled riuers out of hell,
As Erebus, Cocitus, Acheron,
Stix, Orchus, Tartarus, and Phlegeton,
And all infernall Barathrums Damn'd Creekes,
With Charons Passengers, and fearefull shriekes,
Who writing drinking Lethe to their shames
Vnthankefully they haue forgot the Thames.
But noble Thames, whilest I can hold a pen
I will diuulge thy glory vnto men:
Thou in the morning when my coine is scant
Before the euening dost supply my want.
If like a Bee I seeke to liue and thriue,
Thou wilt yeeld hony freely to my hiue,
If like a dronc I will not worke for meate,
Thou in discretion giues me nought to eate
Thou the true rules of Iustice dost obserue,
To feed the lab'rer, let the idle sterue,
And I so many faithlesse men haue found
As any man that liues vpon the ground,
Who haue done me wrong and themselues no good,
And swore, and forswore in their damned mood:
Whilst I (fond I) haue lent and giuen away
To such as not so much as thankes will pay,
For shame and modesty I name them not;
But let their black soules beare the impure blot
Of falshood periury, and odious lyes
That diuels in shape of Mankind can deuise.
If these lines happen to their hands to come,
They'l pick their teeth, look downward and cry hum,
But goodnesse how should euer I expect,
From such who doe so true a friend neglect.
And therefore Thames, with thee I haue decreed
Because thoa neuer faild me in my need,
To thee, to thee againe I doe retire
And with thee Ile remaine till life expire,
The Oare hath foure or fiue vertues; first, it is healthfull, second, it auoyds bad company, third, it keeps men sober, fourth, it gets mony, fift, it auoyds expences all which vertues I will put in practise and fall to rowing.
Thy liberalitie hath flow'd to me,
And for thou alwayes giuest me meanes to liue
My selfe (most thankefully my selfe doe giue.
Momus thou Sonne of Somnus, and of Nox,
Take not my lines all for a Paradox:
For most of them seeme true, and I doe rue
That many of them I doe know too true.
Sleepe Momus sleepe, in Murceas slothfull bed,
Let Morpheus locke thy tongue within thy head:
Or if thou needst wilt prate, prate to this end
To giue commends to that thou canst not mend.
'Tis not a guilded Gull made vp with oathes,
That sweares and dams himselfe into good cloathes,
That weares his cloake beneath his skirts and wast
Cause men may see how he is trust and brac'd:
Such a fantasticke asse, I care not for,
He flewts my lines, and I doe him abhor.
My poore inuention no way is supply'd,
With cutting large thongs from anothers hide:
I haue not stolne a syllable or letter
From any man, to make my booke seeme better.
But similies, comparisons, each line,
Indifferent, good or bad, they all are mine,
Yet I confesse I haue read many a booke
From whence I haue some obseruations tooke.
Which I make vse of, as occasions touch,
And any Poet (I thinke) will doe as much.
I will not brag, to all men bee it knoshne
(By learning) I haue nothing of mine owne,
But had I tongues and languages, like many
Sure I should filch and steale as much as any.
But like an Artlesse Poet, I say still,
I cm a Taylor, true against my will.
Thus ending (like to Iasons Golden-fleece)
This worke of Hempseed is my Master-peace.
| All the workes of Iohn Taylor the Water-Poet | |