 | 'Twixt Kiss and Lip or Under the Sword. By the author of "Women Must Weep," [i.e. F. W. O. Ward] Third edition |  |
773
THE NEW SCANDALOUS CHRONICLE.
They say—we do not guarantee the truth,
If it is freely told—
That pretty Lady Splash, who played at Ruth,
Has wandered from the fold;
Eloped, with rich Lord Boaz, from a mate
Who reined her tightly in,
And wanted her sweet mind to educate,
But never could begin;
Gone off to Paris, with a China jug
Worth thousands and her maid,
Her husband's diamonds and his favourite pug—
And scores of bills unpaid.
If it is freely told—
That pretty Lady Splash, who played at Ruth,
Has wandered from the fold;
Eloped, with rich Lord Boaz, from a mate
Who reined her tightly in,
And wanted her sweet mind to educate,
But never could begin;
Gone off to Paris, with a China jug
Worth thousands and her maid,
Her husband's diamonds and his favourite pug—
And scores of bills unpaid.
They say—though it may be a shocking lie,
And careful must we be—
A peeress ate too much of cranberry pie,
Which did not quite agree;
Then talked of death, and formed a holy plan
Her errors to confess,
And sent for her pet pill, and clergyman
Who came but to—caress;
Who was indeed her lover, and abused
The grandeur of his task,
And penance and embraces all confused,
Beneath that blesséd mask.
And careful must we be—
A peeress ate too much of cranberry pie,
Which did not quite agree;
Then talked of death, and formed a holy plan
Her errors to confess,
And sent for her pet pill, and clergyman
Who came but to—caress;
Who was indeed her lover, and abused
The grandeur of his task,
And penance and embraces all confused,
Beneath that blesséd mask.
They say—but dirty mud we will not fling,
On any noble dress—
Lord Fudge, who could not do a naughty thing,
Has got into a mess;
We name it simply to deny the fact—
That he, of sober age,
Took home a lady who can partner act,
Upon and off the stage;
Then overslept, and the next day at noon,
When dreaming not of harms,
Was caught by someone that returned too soon,
In the fair sinner's arms.
On any noble dress—
Lord Fudge, who could not do a naughty thing,
Has got into a mess;
We name it simply to deny the fact—
That he, of sober age,
Took home a lady who can partner act,
Upon and off the stage;
Then overslept, and the next day at noon,
When dreaming not of harms,
Was caught by someone that returned too soon,
In the fair sinner's arms.
They say—but this is a most doubtful page,
At which we only hint—
A certain ardent Royal Personage,
Is rushing into print;
To tell the story of his thousand loves,
The honey from strange hives,
The cost each year of kisses, rosebuds, gloves,
And other persons' wives;
His ventures in new fancies and on 'Change,
Expenses of his cook
And pussy things with whom he chose to range,
His heart and betting book.
At which we only hint—
A certain ardent Royal Personage,
Is rushing into print;
To tell the story of his thousand loves,
The honey from strange hives,
The cost each year of kisses, rosebuds, gloves,
And other persons' wives;
His ventures in new fancies and on 'Change,
Expenses of his cook
And pussy things with whom he chose to range,
His heart and betting book.
| 'Twixt Kiss and Lip or Under the Sword. By the author of "Women Must Weep," [i.e. F. W. O. Ward] Third edition | |