University of Virginia Library

The third Scœne.

To them Changelove, Stitchvvell, Wife.
Geor.
Let me ruminate.

Stit.

I payd the reckoning Mr Changelove, and am sorry
for it, I meane the wrong I did you.

Chan.
'Twas no offence: or had it, you have satisfi'd.
I love the memory of it. 'Twill be a Story
To greet a ring of friends with: next I meete
Shall have it all.

Wife.

It may passe indeed for a merry one by a good

fire in Winter, which I love dearely.

Chan.

A good fire Mistresse Stitchwell is Winters artificiall
Sun, that renewes Summer within doores. I love it.

Wife.

With two or three good companions, and a gossips
feast.

Chan.
That's very right. Society is the use
Of mans best ornaments. Speech and discourse
Are reasons messengers, that carry errands
From one soule to another. I confesse
I love good company.

Stit.

'Tis a good exercise to rise in a frosty morning, and
kill Birds.

Chan.
You say well Sir, We that have youthfull blood,
That capers in our veines, and swels their concaves
With active warmth, should be inur'd to hardnesse.
Tis healthfull, and I love it.

Geor.
I have it. Doe you know these Franke?

Fran.
Mischiefe, I must prevent them.

Geor.

You may if please you, suffer the Porter to passe,
and stay your selfe. Credit is pretious: let me enjoy my sport,
yours may be preserv'd. Otherwise, your trull and you shall
both suffer. I am desperately resolute, and will reveale all.

Fran.

And I as desperate. Up with it Porter.

Port.

Any thing: will you suffer this Gentleman?

Geor.

Nay then Franke.

Draw. and a passe or two.
Port.

Helpe helpe.

Iam.

If he be gone sweet heart, let me out. I am almost
stifled.

They take him out of the Trunk.
Fran.

Whence that voyce?

Short.

The Gentlemen that were in our company! Let us
prevent them. Be not afraid Wife.

Wife.

Alas I cannot endure such naked weapons.

Chan.

What will this come to?

Iam.

I beseech ye Gentlemen kill me not, I have beene
sufficiently mortified; and I beleeve you may smell the effects
of my feare.

Geor.
Is this the lovely piece, for whose enjoying
I have attempted what by ill successe
Makes me ridiculous: yet I swell with laughter
To thinke how finely she hath gull'd us both,
And mockt our easie trust.

Fran.
Pray' Sir how came you hither?

Iam.
I thinke upon that Porters shoulders.

Fran.
But how into this Trunk?

Iam.

Ile tell you sir. Bargaining for a little sport with
the Gentlewoman, whom I thought to be a wanton, she
possest me with feare, (to which cowardize is alwaies apt,
and I must acknowledge in my selfe) that a Gentleman
(one of you two I take it) had dealt with her for her
Mayden-head, and that shee expected him. He came:
and I fearing lust as well as love would brooke no rivall,
made use of this for my safety. Where being heavy headed
with Ale, I have slept till your noyse wak't me.

Stit.

An excellent conceit; how like you it Wife? This
Gentleman cannot endure the company of Women.

Wife.

I knew before he did but dissemble: that made me
so desirous to try him. There was a Tub at Totenham; you
know the successe of it.

Chan.

I ever thought Mistresse Stitchwell that was your
owne plot; and I love you dearely for it.

Wife.

Love me Mr Changelove? Take heed my Husband
doe not dreame of it.

Chan.

That was her plot too. Now doe I see, some Women
can counterfeit wickednesse, aswell as many dissemble
honesty. Come Sir, let you and I drowne the memory of our
disasters in a cup of Sack.

Exeunt.
Wife.

You see gallants what successe attends your enterprises.

Henceforth account not every City Wife
Wanton, that onely loves a merry life.

Stit.
And here's a double comfort; being wedded,
Shee's neither false, nor am I jealous headed.

Exeunt.
Fran.
Accurst credulity. Could not those doubts
I shapt my jealousie, preserve my first,
And noble resolution! Had I urg'd it
With greater zeale, she must have forc't her reason
To understand m'intention without practise
Of farther tryall. Now she's lost for ever;
Though I should with submission and repentance
Beg reconciliation with her thoughts,
(Whose purity cannot endure to mixe
With mine that were so foule) she would reject it.
Ile back, and try. Lustfull affections hence.
My Lov's new cloth'd in vertuous innocence.

Exit.
Ge.
Frank We are friends: since we have shar'd disgrace,
We kill all malice. Henceforth I shall strive
To live more chaste. Lust is a gilded pill,
Which sinfull nature doth prescribe desire.
It mocks the sence with pleasure; but at last
The shining outside leaves a bitter tast.

Exit.