Satirical poems of the reformation

To the Richt Honourabill and Godly leirnit Gentilman The Laird of Dune, Minister of Goddis Word and Superintendent of His Kirk in Angous, Mernis &c. P.R. His Humbill Seruant S.

To quhome suld I my Rurall veirse direct,
Bot vnto him that can thame weill correct?
Befoir quhome suld this mater ga to licht,
Bot to ane faithfull, Godly, Christin Knicht?
To quhome can I this lytill throuch propyne,
Bot vnto ane of Excellent Ingyne?
Not for the termes, nor for the worthynes
Of ony thing that I do heir expres;
Bot for because I aucht, of bound dewtie,
To dedicat to him sum Noueltie.

227

Go, bill, than, to the Laird of Dune I send the,
Beseiking him to tak his pen and mend the.
Mend the, (alaik!) quhy suld he tak that pane?
To sicht the ones, it will bot vex his brane.
For as, in sum Schyre, thair is bot ane myre,
Quhilk is ouir all, that man and beist dois tyre;
Sa into the he sall bot ane fault find,
Quhilk is ouir all, befoir, and als behind.
Ȝit not the les I knaw him sa discreit,
Gif he mend not thy veirse and haulting feet,
Ȝit at the leist sa surely he will byde the,
That poets nane sall se the to diryde the.
Pas on, than, bauldly, and to him deploir
This present stait. Fair weill: I say no moir.

The Lamentatioun of Lady Scotland, Compylit be hir self, speiking in maner of ane Epistle, in the moneth of Marche, ye zeir of God 1572.

Ȝe vapurs wak, and watters in the air!
Ȝe Seyis sa deip! ȝe fludis and fountanis fair!
Heir my complaint; to ȝow my cace I mene,
That ȝe may wellis gif to my febill ene,
To testifie with teiris my wofull cace,
And with ȝour murning weid absconse my face.

My husband, deir gude Johne, the Cōmoun-weill,
To quhome I did all my affairis reueill,
As he to me did, in our faithfull dayis,
But fraude, or gyle, or tressoun ony wayis:
Than lusty, gay, and flurisching wer we;
Trew, faithfull Children he begat on me.

228

Sic lufe and faith to vther thay did beir,
That thay knew not quhat beist was Ciuile weir.
My heid wald not disdane my leggis and feit,
My Eine foirsaw all perallis micht me meit.
My hands and armes, ay reddy to defend me,
To snib my children gif they did offend me.
My bodie was weill cled with Policie;
My Hat was of Justice and Equitie;
My Coller, of trew Nichtbour lufe it was,
Weill prenit on with Kyndnes and solas;
My Gluifis wer of fre Liberalitie;
My Sleifis wer of to borrow and len glaidlie;
My Lais and Mailȝies of trew permanence;
My stomak maid was of clene Conscience;
My waist was gyrdit with Sobrietie;
My leggs and feit schod with Simplicitie;
My hart was haill; my stomach weill disposit;
Of peice and rest my Bowellis wer composit.
Quhat wald ȝe moir? Schir commoun-weill and I
Held hous lang tyme; bot Sathan had Inuy
To see vs so; than callit he Seditioun,
With pryde his Sone, to quhome he gaif cōmissioun
To tak with thame discord, and Nichtbour feid,
Efter, I mene, that our gude bairnis wer deid,
To poysoun me with thair Infectit cryme,
With sum of my awin children of this tyme:
Of quhilks I pray the Lord God mak me fre.
Ambitioun will not lat thame aggre.
Thir mony ȝeiris thay haue me disconfortit,
I trauell ȝit as I had thame aduortit:
The malice greit, that ilk to vther beiris,
Dois ryfe my bowells with thair Ciuile weiris:
Sair boistit thay my husband commoun-weill,
And maid thair vowis and aithis him for to Keill,
In ony part quhair thay him with me fand;
Quhairfoir, for feir, he fled from me, Scotland.

229

Away, sum sayis, to Veneis is he gone,
Or to the Swisches, as thay do suppone,
Quhair he is saif from danger, hurt, or skaith;
Heir wald he deit of cauld and hounger baith.
Thus am I left as wedow in distres
For commoun-weill: my bairnis left Fatherles.

Children I had, in all vertewis perfyte:
To peice and Justice was thair haill delyte.
Sum of displesure deit for wo and cair;
Sum wyrreit was, and blawin in the air;
And sum in Stirling schot was to the deid,
That mair was geuin to peice nor Ciuile feid.
Bot ane was slane, vnto my skaith and schame,
Becaus he socht to fetch my husband hame:
He was my deir and best belouit Sone;
All that he did, for my weilfair was done.
Lyke ane gude Mediciner, or gude Syruge,
Of euill humouris he did my body purge.
Quhat wald ȝe moir? sen James in Falkland deit
Nane for my weill sa weill with me aggreit,
Nor ȝit sa weill did lufe Schir Commoun-weill,
Nor vnto me bure sic ane feruent ȝeill.
Murdreist he was in Lythgow tratrouslie;
The murtherars vnto my heid did fle,
Quhair thay tuik hald, and ȝit dois hald thame fast,
And ay sensyne my heid hes bene agast.
For quhy throw Falset and Subtillitie
Thay chaist away Justice and Equitie;
For laik of quhilks my heid dois wark and ȝaik,
And all my body trymbill dois and schaik:
For, quhen the heid is seik, the Prouerb is,
That all the members be the worse, I wis.

My claithis ar reuin, that pietie is to se;
Particular weill hes spulȝeit policie.

230

My Coller rent is be Dame Fremitnes;
The Prenis thairof ar reft be sad Nysenes;
Dame Nigartnes my Gluifis hes hint away;
Tak for himself my Sleifis dois reist and stay.
My Lace and Mailȝeis tane be Variance;
My Stomak worne is be dissimulance;
My belt is cuttit of pure Gluttonie;
My leggs and feit now schod with Pouertie;
My hart is seik; my stomach keipis na meit;
My bowells Rumbills as thay wald vther eit.
Now for to couer all this villannie,
Ane Cloik thay gif me of authoritie.
Authoritie, (alaik!) na les thay mene,
For thay desyre neuer to se thair Quene;
Bot that thay may in hir Name bruik offices,
With power to cleik vp the benefices.
Nane I excuse on ather syde; for quhy
Ilk ane his awin hous seikis to edify,
And nane dois cair for Commoun-weill ane prene.

I grant I had ane Douchter was ane Quene,
Baith gude and fair, gentill and Liberall,
Dotit with vertewis and wit Naturall;
Prignant in Spreit, in all things honourabill,
Lusty, gude lyke, to all men fauourabill;
Schamefull to euill, baith honest, meik and law;
Thir vertewis all scho had, quhyls scho stude aw
Of God Eterne, as of hir Gouernour,
And quhen scho did regaird hir hie Honour.
Bot at the last, throw filthy speiche and Counsell,
That scho did heir of sum curst Kittie vnsell,
Fra scho gaif eir to sic vyle bawderie,
God, Schame, and honour, scho forȝet all thre.

It wer to lang the vices to reheirse,
Quhairin from thyne scho did hir self exerce:

231

The Reidar wald thame think maist Insolent,
Bot I thame leif, becaus thay ar Recent:
For quhilks scho was thocht vnworthy to Ring,
Ane Crowne to bruik or ony Royall thing:
Sa all my Children, with hir awin consent,
Deposit hir in oppin Parliament.
Than wald scho that thay suld hir awin sone crowne,
Quhilk thing thay did sa Syce vp and Sink downe:
God saue his Grace: for quhy the same is he
In me that hes the trew authoritie.

Praisit be God, I haue, fre at command,
That fair ȝoung Prince in Stirling, my richt hand.
Wer not in hope I leif to se that day,
That he sall purge thir foull humouris away,
And me restoir agane vnto my helth,
Ȝea, caus my Children flurische in all welth:
Wer not he is brocht vp in all gude thing
Affeiring to ane Godly Prince and King,
Be gude Lord Deddy, my trew faithfull freind,
Cum of ane race of men to me maist kynd;
For Lady Minnie, I dar tak in hand,
Happy is he hes sic ane gouernand:
Wer not thir thingis that maks me leif in hope,
At libertie to se this Lyoun scope,
One day to Rore and Ramp vpon his fois,
To bring thame law, that now sa proudly gois:
Wer not thir thingis, I say, and vthers mo,
I wald dispair, and die for pane and wo.
To ȝow, Vapouris, and watters in the air,
And seyis sa deip, I downe my plaint declair.
Ȝe seyis, I say, gif passage, and ȝe can,
Till sum faithfull to bring hame my gude-man.

And ȝe, my Kirk, my Faithfull Mother deir,
That purgit art of Channoun, Monk, and Freir,

232

Of Papist Priest, Papist, and Papistrie,
Bot not, allace, clene of Hypocrasie,
Of auarice, pryde and ambitioun,
Thocht ȝe haue left all Superstitioun:
I grant the word of God is trewlie Preichit,
And in the schuills Exercise trewlie teichit;
Ȝit, sayis the Commounis, ȝe do not ȝour office,
For vpaland thay haue not dew seruice:
The rowmis appointit pepill to confidder,
To heir Gods word, quhair thay suld pray togidder,
Ar now conuertit in scheip Coits and Fauldis,
Or ells ar fallin, becaus nane thame vphauldis;
The Parische Kirkis, I mene, thay sa misgyde
That nane for wynd and rane thairin may byde:
Thairfoir na plesure tak thay of the tempill;
Nor ȝit to cum quhair nocht is to contempill
Bot Crawis and Dowis cryand and makand beir,
That nane throuchly the Minister may heir;
Baith Fedders, Fylth, and Doung dois ly abrod,
Quhair folk suld sit to heir the word of God;
Quhilk is occasioun to the aduersaryes
To mok and scorne sic things befoir ȝour eyes.
Thus to disdane the hous of Orisoun
Dois mak folk cauld to thair Deuotioun.
And als thay do disdane to heir Gods word,
Thinking the same to be ane Jesting bourd;
Thay go to labour, drinking, or to play,
And not to ȝow vpon the Sabboth day:
Sa thay prouoke the wraith of God, allace!
Quhilk hes maid me to fall in this distres.
Ȝit suld I not blame ȝou, that sic dois perische,
Bot Lords, and Lairds, & Cōmouns of ilk Parische,
The quhilk wer wont for to caus euerie pleuch,
In vphalding the Kirk, to pay aneuch.
To do the same ȝe suld thame ȝit exhort,
Togidder that thay suld the pure support.

233

The Prouerb is: of Palice, Kirk and brig,
Better in tyme to beit nor efter to big.

Ȝe collegis and Uniuersitie,
That to all vthers suld exempill be,
I se ȝour tempills cassin downe and reuin:
The maist part are bot theikit with the heuin.
This, quhilk to ȝow I do sa planely wryte,
The commounis speiks of ȝow and dois bakbyte.
Amend sic things, I humblie ȝow beseik,
And dit the mouths of thame that sa dois speik,
Making ȝour lyfis and Conuersatiouns
To preiche and teiche lyke vnto ȝour persouns.
It suld be ȝe, Mother, suld me instruct;
It suld be ȝe, to Christ suld me conduct;
It suld be ȝe, suld schaw me the richt way,
How I suld serue my God baith nicht and day;
It suld be ȝe, that suld do diligence
For to aggre this Ciuile difference;
It suld be ȝe, throw Preiching, suld me mufe
To Cheritie and freindly Nichtbour lufe;
It suld be ȝe, that suld gif gude exempill
Of lyfe and warks to thame dois ȝow contempill;
It suld be ȝe, that suld be at all tyme
Clene without spot, and purgit of all cryme;
It suld be ȝe, Mother, it suld be ȝe,
To quhome the pepill suld giue eir and Ee;
It suld be ȝe, schortly, I say no moir,
That to all vertewis suld ȝow Indeuoir.

And ȝe, my Barrouns and Nobilitie,
That dois oppres my pure Communitie,
Quhair is ȝour wit, ȝour ressoun, sence, and feill,
To fle away my husband Commoun-weill?
Quhat haue ȝe wyn sensyne? lat se ȝour ganis:
Gar pryse ȝour proffeit, & esteme ȝour panis.

234

The panis, I wait, the proffeit will surmont,
A greit daill moir nor ȝe can mak ȝour compt.
I find, sensyne the Ȝow hes borne the bell,
Wyfis Maisters bene in geuing haill Counsell
To Lords and Lairds; I speik generallie,
As may be sene, allace! ouir weill on me.
Hume, Huntly, Grange, and all ȝe of that syde,
Behald now how ȝe do the mater gyde,
To caus my Sisters France and Ingland scorne ȝow,
That walterars of Courts ȝe lat suborne ȝow:
Ȝit ȝe and thay did sweir with aithis conding,
And did subscryue to be trew to the King.
In takin quhairof, with all ȝe did aggre,
To Crowne and place him in authoritie.
Gif ȝe wirk weill, ȝour deids ane day will schaw,
For raising fyre aganis my actis and law,
In halding towns and strenths ȝour King aganis,
Putting the rest of ȝour brether to panis;
Quhome I excuse not, as I said befoir,
For I persaif, ambitioun and vane gloir
And gredynes to reule dois blind ȝow baith,
Quhilk dois redound to my greit hurt and skaith.
Ȝour tennents plenȝeis that thay ar opprest
Be ȝow and ȝours, that dois thame soir molest.
Ȝe hicht yair maills; yair pleuchs ȝe dowbil on yame;
Thay tyne thair tyme at sic things to opone yame;
For na rest will ȝe get into ȝour raggs,
Gif sum sect knaw that thay haue geir or baggs;
Ȝour Nichtingaills will sing sa in ȝour eiris,
That ȝe sall nichtly haue Domestik weiris.
“Ȝon carle,” quod scho, “my Joy, dois beinly dwell,
And all prouisioun hes within himsell,
In barne or byre, in hall, Girnell, and Seller;
His wyfe weiris weluot on hir Gowne and Coller;
Thay ar sa riche, that thay do vs misknaw;
Than better sone to drag nor lait to draw.”

235

Sone in his Gersum hichtit, and his Maillis;
Him self grows waik, his geir and houshald faillis:
Quhair sic wer wont to haue Guse, Cok, and Hen,
Breid, drink, and bedding, to treit honest men,
Now drink thay Mylk and Swaits in steid of Aill,
And glaid to get Peis breid and watter Caill:
Quhair sic wer wont to ride furth to the weir,
With Jak and Sword, gude hors, Knapscull, & speir;
Quhair sic wer wont brauely to mak thame bowne,
With Lord or Laird to ryde to Burrowis towne;
Quhair sic wer wont at all Games to be reddy,
To schuit or loup, for to exerce thair body:
Now mon thay wirk and labour, pech and pant,
To pay thair Maisters Maillis exhorbitant;
Ryue out the Mures; the bestialls gers intak:
Thay ar sa waik thay dow not beir a Jak,
And gets waik bairns, euill nureist, in distres:
Sa be sic wayis my Commouns dois dicres.
My torment sair constrynis me this to speik;
Na merweil quhy, for I am wondrous seik;
Beseiking ȝow my seiknes to remeid,
Quhilk may be done, ceissing ȝour Ciuile feid
To follow Christ and his Commandement,
Quha said, befoir his last department;
“Ilk one lufe vther with sic freindly lufe,
That ȝe may be the bairnis of God abufe;
And cleith ȝow with fair Garments clene & quhyte,
Without malice, contentioun, or dispyte,
Aganis my cūming quhilk trewly salbe,
Quhen ȝe leist wene, in twinkling of an Ee.”
Thus said the Lord to ȝow, and to all men,
That be thir marks thay sall God's children ken.
Heirfoir, my Nobills, seik peice, do that ȝe can
To follow Christ, and chais away Sathan,
With his Supposts, and all that taks in hand
For to diuorse me from my gude husband.

236

Now ȝe, my Burges, Craftis, & Merchand men,
And ȝe, my Commounis, with my hynd ȝemen,
To ȝow I haue sum purpois for to say,
How, quhen, and quhy, my husband fled away.
First, thair come in, lurkand vpon ȝour gait,
Pryde and Inuy, with Falset and Dissait.
Thir four socht ludgeing all the towne about.
Quhat suld thay seik? Lang time thay lay thairout,
Till ane Ȝule euin ȝour wyfes to counsall went;
Than spak ane Lawers wyfe, baith trym and gent:
“Cūmers,” quod scho, “it is a pietie to se
Folk in a towne for cauld and hounger die;
It is mair schame in Burgh for to se beggers
Nor is it skaith in Crawmont to want dreggers:
Quhairof dois serue our greit cheir and fair bigging,
Bot for to help the pure that gais a thigging?
Quhairof dois serue our husbands gold and rent,
Bot to sustene the pure and Indigent?
Ȝit lat vs ludge ȝone twa that gais befoir,
Pryde and Inuy, gif we will do no moir;
And gif our husbands speirs quhy did we so,
Answer we may, we left them vther two.
Now gif ȝe pleis, Cummers, I sall begin
This same cauld nicht to tak ane of thame in.”
“We knaw thame not,” quod thay; “bot tak ȝe ane,
We must not leif the vther bird alane.”
So thay did skaill; and scho tuke with hir Pryde;
And on the morne scho come furth lyke ane bryde,
With hir new Gaist, als proud as ane Paycok,
And in hir hart scho did hir cummers mok:
Quhilk quhen thay saw, with speid thay ran in hy,
And for dispyte amangs thame ludgit Inuy,
In counterfuting hir in all kin things,
Courche, Coller, Cloik, Belt, Braislets, & Rings.
Then wox the Lawers wyfe richt proud in hart;
Bot ȝit hir cummers callit scho apart,

237

Saying, “Cummers, quhat is the caus, and quhy,
That, in dispyte of me, ȝe treit Inuy?”
“Becaus,” quod thay, “that ȝe alone tuik Pryde,
And thocht that we suld not marche ȝow besyde;
Thairfoir we thocht in that point ȝe did wrang vs:”
“Aggre,” quod scho, “and ludge thame baith amang vs.”
Quhilk thing thay did, and all did condiscend
To treit and keip thame to the warlds end.
Thus hes ȝour wyfis thir twa tane to be thairs,
And left the vther twa for ȝour affairs.
Quhilk seing ȝe and ȝour wairs gros and grof,
And with ȝour wyfis thir two so muche maid of;
Ȝe gros geir left, and went for wyne and spyces,
Frenche claith and silks, for to cleith vp thir vyces:
Quhilks for to out with dowbill met and mesure,
The vther tway ȝe ludgeit at thair plesure.
Quhat wald ȝe moir? ȝe wait weill quhat I mene:
Disludge thame now, and chais thame from ȝow clene.

Ȝe Hammer men, ȝe that maks schois and claiths,
Ȝe treit thir twa with mony manesworne aiths;
And ȝe lykewise, all Crafts in Generall,
Alaik, I feill ȝow to thame bound and thrall:
Mairouir, ȝour drinking Extraordinair
Maks oft ȝour wyfis and bairns euill to fair:
Quhen ȝe wald drink in hous, ȝe may be bauld
To do the same at hame with ȝour houshald:
All byganis mend: in tyme to cum, luick ȝe
Begyle na man, bot wirk ȝour wark trewlie.

To ȝow, my Commouns, quhat mair can I say?
I pietie ȝow as far furth as I may;
Now pure ȝe ar, ȝit purer wald ȝe be
For vsing proud pure Prodigalitie.
Thair is na Lord nor Laird in all this land,
Bot ȝe man counterfait in claiths fra hand,

238

Fra top to ta, thocht ȝe suld beg and borrow.
Johne, ga ȝour way, for it will not be for ȝow:
Ȝe suld ȝour ground grube with Simplicitie,
And mak ȝour claiths conforme to ȝour degre;
Bot ȝe, ȝour wyfe, and bairns, can tak na rest,
Without ȝe counterfait the worthyest:
Buft brawlit hois, Coit, Dowblet, sark, and scho:
Ȝour wyfe and bairns conforme mon be thairto.
Leif of, and leirne ȝour bairns to saw and teill:
Sic doings chaist away the Commoun-weill.

All thir foirfalts that I haue done reheirs,
That Lords, Lairds, Ladys, and Lawers dois exerce,
Kirk, Burges, Merchand, Cōmouns, Crafts and all,
Hes haill the wyte of this my wofull fall.
Amend heirfoir and call to God for Grace,
Beseiking him to gif vs rest and peace,
In our lyfe tyme, that we may trewly knaw
Ane God Eterne, ane Faith, ane King, ane Law;
And at the last to bring vs to his gloir,
To Ring with him in blys for euer moir. Amen.

The Conclusion be P.R. to all and Sum.

All that this reids, the mater sad will think;
Sum that this heirs, I wait, will discommend it;
Thocht all and sum heir at partly do schrink,
Ȝit sory I that thay suld be offendit;
Heirfoir, I wald that this wer blythlie endit.
For to mak all or sum lauch at the last,
Than all and sum sall heir, in tyme bypast
Quhen Fornicatioun haldin was na cryme,
How that sum prelats did walk, pray, and fast,
And serue in Kirk according to that tyme.

239

A prelat ane day in his bed, to sport him,
Did clap his lufe with kisses soft and sweit;
In this meane tyme, thair was, to recomfort him,
Peirtryks and pleuers pyping on the speit.
Then vp he rais, and made him for thame meit,
With gude quhyte wyne and all the partinence.
Quhen he had tane this on his conscience,
He gaif ane greit pech, lyke ane weill fed stirk,
“Och, Lord,” quod he, “Now gif me patience!
Quhat stres thoill we to serue thy haly Kirk!”

Imprentit at Sanctandrois be Robert Lekpreuik.

Finis.

University of Virginia Library

XXXIII. The Lamentatioū of Lady Scotland, compylit be hir self, speiking in maner of ane Epistle, in the Moneth of Marche, the zeir of God 1572.[_] The attribution of this poem is questionable.

The Lamentatioun of Lady Scotland, Compylit be hir self, speiking in maner of ane Epistle, in the moneth of Marche, ye zeir of God 1572.

The Conclusion be P.R. to all and Sum.

XXXIII. The Lamentatioū of Lady Scotland, compylit be hir self, speiking in maner of ane Epistle, in the Moneth of Marche, the zeir of God 1572.
[_]

The attribution of this poem is questionable.