 | The Cavalier daily Friday, October 29, 1971 |  |
UBA BAT Offers Cucurbito Pepo
Uba this and Uba that,
Uba is an Uba Bat.
Once again it is that Friday
before Halloween. Today October
29, 1971 in esteemed recognition
of Uba Bat, whose real name was
Foster (pronounced Tck-Tck) the
1705 Jefferson Park Avenue
Authority will sponsor the
SECOND FIRST ANNUAL UBA
BAT MEMORIAL PUMPKIN
HUNT.
Late last night, henchmen of
King Kababa winged their way
around the grounds of the
University, prokantally hiding
pumpkins, hither and thither, ere
and yon. Emblazoned with the sign
of the Uba Bat and the 1705 JPAA,
these 60 some pumpkins may be
redeemed by their finders for
something really, really neat (Please
one pumpkin per being). The
neatest prize of all will be given for
a rather excruciatingly, charismatic,
offspring of a cucurbito pepo
(HOTCHA!)
Pumpkins and their finders may
be redeemed, amensytized,
transfused or thrown at 1705 J.P.A.
between the house, but not at all
withstanding. If you can't find an
Uba Bat Pumpkin, bring your own
lonely pumpkin by anyway,
anytime. Final festivities will begin
around 8:00 PM Friday night at
which time the High Hunter will be
announced.
To get back to the story, Uba
Bat was a late 19th century
Scandinavian architect and the
father of the modern pumpkins as
we know them today. The true
identity of the mother has not yet
been ascertained, but speculation
has suggested Mary Queen of Scots,
Martha Mitchell, or the Baja
Marimba Band.
Halloween Without UBA BAT! Impossible!
Uba Bat is credited for
discovering the first true
haloo shegenic drug, dried,
pulverized pumpkin seeds. After
experiencing the mind blowing
effects of the drug, he exclaimed
his now very famous disblurtation,
"Blow your nose, not your mind".
Long known for his expositions
on this and that, Uba met his
untimely end at the hands of an
opium crazed Druid, wielding a
harmongus slingshot. And Uba Bat
died with a pumpkin between the
eyes.
| The Cavalier daily Friday, October 29, 1971 | |