 | The Baroness of New York |  |
XVII.
It took two large, brown envelopes,
Of Congress-shape; in fact, such ones
As Congressmen frank home by tons,
To hold this tale of blighted hopes.
Of Congress-shape; in fact, such ones
As Congressmen frank home by tons,
To hold this tale of blighted hopes.
He sealed them tight, addressed each one,
Then licked the unlicked Washington,
And stamped them fully.
Then he rose
And, feeling really he had done
All things a gentleman could do,
He rolled a cigarette.
Then unto
This fuse he plied a match, and blew
A booming, double volley through
His lifted and beclouded nose;
As if some double-barreled gun
Shot at the ugly world below,
The cold, cold, cruel world, you know.
Then licked the unlicked Washington,
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Then he rose
And, feeling really he had done
All things a gentleman could do,
He rolled a cigarette.
Then unto
This fuse he plied a match, and blew
A booming, double volley through
His lifted and beclouded nose;
As if some double-barreled gun
Shot at the ugly world below,
The cold, cold, cruel world, you know.
The letters sent, he paced the floor
Impatiently, and until morn,
As one most hopeless, in proud scorn.
What would she do?
What could he more?
These things he questioned o'er and o'er,
Till morn made answer at the door.
Impatiently, and until morn,
As one most hopeless, in proud scorn.
What would she do?
What could he more?
These things he questioned o'er and o'er,
Till morn made answer at the door.
He was as one condemned to death,
Who respite prays, with bated breath,
And clutches quick and breaks the seal
To see what fate may now reveal.
He snatched this from the messenger,
And read these hasty lines from her.
Who respite prays, with bated breath,
And clutches quick and breaks the seal
To see what fate may now reveal.
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And read these hasty lines from her.
“My dear Sir Francis,
Come! O come!
I stand with arms outstretched. The door
Is wider even than before.
My eyes droop down, my lips are dumb,
I walk all time the empty floor.
I will not sit until you come.
Come! O come!
I stand with arms outstretched. The door
Is wider even than before.
My eyes droop down, my lips are dumb,
I walk all time the empty floor.
I will not sit until you come.
“Is love, indeed, a little thing
To be put by at time like this,
While we stand mute and wondering?
O come, Sir Francis! come now, come!
Shall my life round to this small sum?
Shall I make love a trade, and change,
Childlike, for aught that falls amiss,
And range as common women range?
To be put by at time like this,
While we stand mute and wondering?
O come, Sir Francis! come now, come!
Shall my life round to this small sum?
Shall I make love a trade, and change,
Childlike, for aught that falls amiss,
And range as common women range?
“O, do not think me over-bold!
You say you suffer unto death.
Then this is my excuse. The cold
And cautious world, with poison breath,
I know right well will sentence me
To infamy for this. I see
No other road of duty. So I dare
Do that which I deem fit and fair.
You say you suffer unto death.
Then this is my excuse. The cold
And cautious world, with poison breath,
I know right well will sentence me
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No other road of duty. So I dare
Do that which I deem fit and fair.
“As for the chains and prison's shame,
Take no reproach. 'Tis nobler far
To bear defeat than shine a star
In circled seat of rounded fame.
I reach my hand in trust to you,
I give unshaken faith, the same
As when you rode with shining name,
The lion of the Avenue.
Take no reproach. 'Tis nobler far
To bear defeat than shine a star
In circled seat of rounded fame.
I reach my hand in trust to you,
I give unshaken faith, the same
As when you rode with shining name,
The lion of the Avenue.
“I give all this, Sir Francis Jain.
Pray hold it not in proud disdain.
And do you know what little task
My love in full return shall ask?
Pray hold it not in proud disdain.
And do you know what little task
My love in full return shall ask?
“Why, it is this. When you shall stand
Beside me, and shall hold my hand,
And I shall lift my happy face
Full into yours, O love, then you
Shall promise that if e'er disgrace
Touch me, that you will prove as true.
“Think thrice, Sir Francis, ere you speak,
For time is strong and man is weak.
Think thrice, then come, and that shall be
As God's own covenant to me.
Beside me, and shall hold my hand,
And I shall lift my happy face
Full into yours, O love, then you
Shall promise that if e'er disgrace
Touch me, that you will prove as true.
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For time is strong and man is weak.
Think thrice, then come, and that shall be
As God's own covenant to me.
“Now bear with truth, and hear me through.
I am a liar, traitor. You
Are truth itself compared to one
Who calls, heart-broken and undone.
Your truth has conquered me, for now
I know that man may keep a vow.
I am a liar, traitor. You
Are truth itself compared to one
Who calls, heart-broken and undone.
Your truth has conquered me, for now
I know that man may keep a vow.
“I am no Baroness. Nay, I
Am an impostor, and the lie
Is crushing me.
There, take it all!
You hold the ladder. Let me fall
Or hold me to my place, and you
Shall be my star the cycles through.
Am an impostor, and the lie
Is crushing me.
There, take it all!
You hold the ladder. Let me fall
Or hold me to my place, and you
Shall be my star the cycles through.
“Ah! you despise me. That you may
Despise me thoroughly, I pray
Hear this. I once was wed
To one I loved as never man
Was loved since history began.
He left me to my death. He fled,
But he is dead, thank God, is dead.
Despise me thoroughly, I pray
Hear this. I once was wed
To one I loved as never man
Was loved since history began.
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But he is dead, thank God, is dead.
“I speak it earnestly. And yet
I cannot, cannot all forget
Of that great love. It comes to me
As climbs some storm-sea o'er the beach;
Yea, comes like some great, tidal sea
And teems and drowns my topmost reach.
You see, O love, I offer you
No virgin love, yet love as true.
I cannot, cannot all forget
Of that great love. It comes to me
As climbs some storm-sea o'er the beach;
Yea, comes like some great, tidal sea
And teems and drowns my topmost reach.
You see, O love, I offer you
No virgin love, yet love as true.
“I do confess the world is dear,
For stormed and cruel was my youth;
And now I stand low-humbled here,
Divested of my crown, as one
Who hath some grand reign just begun.
The world is dear; but dearer truth,
If I can find a man as true,
O love, to challenge truth, as you.
For stormed and cruel was my youth;
And now I stand low-humbled here,
Divested of my crown, as one
Who hath some grand reign just begun.
The world is dear; but dearer truth,
If I can find a man as true,
O love, to challenge truth, as you.
“My broken heart, pierced through and through,
Throbs audibly. I would reveal
Its utmost chamber now to you
And not one sacred niche conceal. ...
And you have all. My weakness is
A longing for a love like this
God promised me, and for a name,
A proud, fair name. Shall I confess
That this same name, the Baroness,
Was more to me, is dearer yet,
Than gold or lands? A crown of shame,
Alas! shall be my coronet.
Throbs audibly. I would reveal
Its utmost chamber now to you
And not one sacred niche conceal. ...
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A longing for a love like this
God promised me, and for a name,
A proud, fair name. Shall I confess
That this same name, the Baroness,
Was more to me, is dearer yet,
Than gold or lands? A crown of shame,
Alas! shall be my coronet.
“Go save your friend. Give him the hand
That had been mine. Then come to me,
If you, through all eternity,
Would save a soul. I cannot stand
Alone. This well-established lie
Is like a mill-stone to my neck, and I
Must reach some solid shore or die.
That had been mine. Then come to me,
If you, through all eternity,
Would save a soul. I cannot stand
Alone. This well-established lie
Is like a mill-stone to my neck, and I
Must reach some solid shore or die.
“Yet if there lives on all this earth
One man as true, yea, half as true,
Yea, of one-hundredth part the worth
As this same friend that waits for you,
Why come, if you despise me not,
And let us haste, haste, seek the spot
Where he conceals, and reach this man
Two hands; two hands! for surely two,
Made strong with love, and reaching so,
Were stronger for his poor soul than
One hand made weak with pain and woe.”
One man as true, yea, half as true,
Yea, of one-hundredth part the worth
As this same friend that waits for you,
Why come, if you despise me not,
And let us haste, haste, seek the spot
Where he conceals, and reach this man
Two hands; two hands! for surely two,
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Were stronger for his poor soul than
One hand made weak with pain and woe.”
As some brief-banished king that turns
Rejoicing to resume his throne—
As some bright light that leaps and burns
Above the darkness when the blown
Swift winds delight the leaping flame,
Sir Francis, fond and eager came.
Rejoicing to resume his throne—
As some bright light that leaps and burns
Above the darkness when the blown
Swift winds delight the leaping flame,
Sir Francis, fond and eager came.
For he had groped with sorrow through
The vale of desolation. He
Had learned how rare the fountains are
On life's long, level desert. Few
Had been his friends, and these were far
Away in banishment. He knew,
And strange, indeed, how few there be
Who know how rare is love! Ah me!
Who know the half way worth of it;
Or even love's delightful counterfeit!
The vale of desolation. He
Had learned how rare the fountains are
On life's long, level desert. Few
Had been his friends, and these were far
Away in banishment. He knew,
And strange, indeed, how few there be
Who know how rare is love! Ah me!
Who know the half way worth of it;
Or even love's delightful counterfeit!
| The Baroness of New York | |