THE HARBISONS' BABY.
MR. and MRS. HARBISON had just finished their breakfast. Mr. Harbison had
pushed back, and was looking under the lounge for his boots. Mrs. Harbison
sat at the table, holding the infant Harbison, and mechanically working her
fore-finger in its mouth. Suddenly she paused in the motion, threw the astonished
child on its back, turned as white as a sheet, pried open its mouth, and
immediately gasped, "Ephraim!" Mr. Harbison, who was on his knees, with his
head under the lounge, at once came forth, rapping his head sharply on the
side of the lounge as he did so, and, getting on his feet, inquired what
was the matter. "O Ephraim!" said she, the tears rolling down her cheeks,
and the smiles coursing up. "Why, what is it, Armethea?" said the astonished
Mr. Harbison, smartly rubbing his head where it had come in contact with
the lounge. "Baby"—she gasped. Mr. Harbison turned pale, and commenced to
sweat. "Baby has—Oh, oh, oh, Ephraim! Baby has—baby has got a tooth!"—"No!"
screamed Mr. Harbison, spreading his legs apart, dropping his chin, and staring
at the struggling heir with all his might. "I tell you it is," persisted
Mrs. Harbison, with a slight evidence of hysteria. "Oh, oh, it can't be!"
protested Mr. Harrison, preparing to swear if it wasn't. "Come here and see
for yourself," said Mrs. Harbison. "Open its 'ittle mousy wousy for its own
muzzer; that's a toody woody; that's a b'essed 'ittle 'ump o' sugar." Thus
conjured, the heir opened its mouth sufficiently for the author of its being
to thrust in his finger; and that gentleman, having convinced himself by
the most indubitable evidence that a tooth was there, immediately kicked
his hat across the room, buried his fist in the lounge, and declared with
much feeling and vehemence that he could lick the individual
who would dare
to intimate that he was not the happiest man on the face of the earth. Then
he gave Mrs. Harbison a hearty smack on the mouth, and snatched up the heir;
while that lady rushed tremblingly forth after Mrs. Simmons, who lived next
door. In a moment, Mrs. Simmons came tearing in as if she had been shot out
of a gun; and right behind her came Mrs. Harbison at a speed that indicated
she had been ejected from two guns. Mrs. Simmons at once snatched the heir
from the arms of Mr. Harbison, and hurried it to the window, where she made
a careful and critical examination of its mouth; while Mrs. Harbison held
its head, and tried to still the throbbings of her heart; and Mr. Harbison
danced up and down, and snapped his fingers, to show how calm he was. It
having been ascertained by Mrs. Simmons that the tooth was a sound one, and
also that the strongest hopes for its future could be entertained on account
of its coming in the new of the moon, Mrs. Harbison got out the necessary
material, and Mr. Harbison at once proceeded to write seven different letters
to as many persons, unfolding to them the event of the morning, and inviting
them to come on as soon as possible.