Posthumous Works of Dr. George Sewell ... To which are added Poems on Several Occasions, Published in his Life-Time |
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EPILOGUE TO THE Artful Husband, a Comedy. |
 | Posthumous Works of Dr. George Sewell |  |
72
EPILOGUE TO THE Artful Husband, a Comedy.
Gallants, without a Length of Formal Speeches,
How did you like Me in my Sparkish Breeches?
Did not my Motions promise Manly Pleasure,
And seem to signify much Hidden Treasure?
Alas! alas! my Buxom Widow thought
She had a Bargain in the Thing she bought.
You all well know their Consciences, but still
It is the Trial proves the Fencer's Skill:
And when it came to That, upon my Word,
I wav'd the Fight, because I had no Sword.
O! 'twas a lovely Scene between us Two,
When Stocking toss'd, the Company withdrew.
How oft my wishing Widow cry'd, My Dear,
And toss'd, and sigh'd, and whisper'd in my Ear;
While I, pretending Sleep, the Pillow press'd,
And left my Phœnix burning in her Nest.
You saw how in the Morning she behav'd,
True to her Sex, how like a Wife she rav'd:
The Copy of those Lectures at your Houses,
From the shrill Tongues of disappointed Spouses.
Well, when that Part was over, something still
Was wanting to compleat a Woman's Will,
To change the Words, For Better and for Worse,
Into the comfortable Sound, Divorce.
This I perform'd too with that dext'rous Art,
I got Two Fortunes, and One Lover's Heart.
How did you like Me in my Sparkish Breeches?
Did not my Motions promise Manly Pleasure,
And seem to signify much Hidden Treasure?
Alas! alas! my Buxom Widow thought
She had a Bargain in the Thing she bought.
You all well know their Consciences, but still
It is the Trial proves the Fencer's Skill:
And when it came to That, upon my Word,
I wav'd the Fight, because I had no Sword.
73
When Stocking toss'd, the Company withdrew.
How oft my wishing Widow cry'd, My Dear,
And toss'd, and sigh'd, and whisper'd in my Ear;
While I, pretending Sleep, the Pillow press'd,
And left my Phœnix burning in her Nest.
You saw how in the Morning she behav'd,
True to her Sex, how like a Wife she rav'd:
The Copy of those Lectures at your Houses,
From the shrill Tongues of disappointed Spouses.
Well, when that Part was over, something still
Was wanting to compleat a Woman's Will,
To change the Words, For Better and for Worse,
Into the comfortable Sound, Divorce.
This I perform'd too with that dext'rous Art,
I got Two Fortunes, and One Lover's Heart.
No more, ye Beauties, then these Shifts despise,
But stoop to wear the Breeches deep Disguise.
If before Wedlock they deserve this Praise,
You're sure to wear 'em after, all your Days.
But now the Secret's out, and it is plain
That I am downright Woman once again.
You Men are fancying the Ways and Means
To prove the Truth of this behind the Scenes:
But work not faith the Cunning of your Brains,
You'll have but just your Labour for your Pains;
For it is hard, if I, who you all know
Have bit a Widow, cannot bite a Beau.
But stoop to wear the Breeches deep Disguise.
74
You're sure to wear 'em after, all your Days.
But now the Secret's out, and it is plain
That I am downright Woman once again.
You Men are fancying the Ways and Means
To prove the Truth of this behind the Scenes:
But work not faith the Cunning of your Brains,
You'll have but just your Labour for your Pains;
For it is hard, if I, who you all know
Have bit a Widow, cannot bite a Beau.
| Posthumous Works of Dr. George Sewell | |