 | The Battle of the "Annuals." |  |
“ARMA VIRUMQUE CANO ------”
1
THE BATTLE OF THE “ANNUALS.”
O Mars! thou God of Battles fierce!—
O pugilistic Cribb!
O guide my fist in this romance,
And teach it how to—fib.
O pugilistic Cribb!
O guide my fist in this romance,
And teach it how to—fib.
“Come, gentle Spring!”—pride of the Ring,
That oft a nose hast broke,
Instruct my muse to make a “hit,”
Eke with a playful “stroke.”
That oft a nose hast broke,
Instruct my muse to make a “hit,”
Eke with a playful “stroke.”
2
And of thy spirit, in my mind
Infuse a little drop,
And lest my wit should run too fast,
O! teach me where to “stop.”
Infuse a little drop,
And lest my wit should run too fast,
O! teach me where to “stop.”
And ye, O small-beer Critics! stay
Your pens, while I recite;
For I too wield a lusty pen,
That all my wrongs can—write!
Your pens, while I recite;
For I too wield a lusty pen,
That all my wrongs can—write!
And now, my Public, list while I
A wordy strife rehearse,
And tell in verse, in merry turn,
Of many a reverse.
A wordy strife rehearse,
And tell in verse, in merry turn,
Of many a reverse.
“The Battle of the Annuals”
May yield at least some sport;
The public voice their trumpet is,
And verse and prose their—forte!
May yield at least some sport;
The public voice their trumpet is,
And verse and prose their—forte!
3
'Tis strange, but true, and right well known,
They all are bitter foes,—
No wonder yearly blossoms should
From blossoms come to blows.
They all are bitter foes,—
No wonder yearly blossoms should
From blossoms come to blows.
For precedence they boldly strike,
Nought can their warmth repress,—
They all are volunteers, although
The offspring of the “press.”
Nought can their warmth repress,—
They all are volunteers, although
The offspring of the “press.”
In leather trappings some appear,
While others silk reveal;
And most, like knights of other days,
Are arm'd with plates of steel.
[OMITTED]
While others silk reveal;
And most, like knights of other days,
Are arm'd with plates of steel.
The lordly “Keepsake” lauds himself,
And is “all vain enough;”
But 'neath his silken robe there peeps
A garb of—common stuff!
And is “all vain enough;”
But 'neath his silken robe there peeps
A garb of—common stuff!
4
In vain it boasts its gaudy hues,
By men of rank drawn out;—
That all his contributions are
Rank nonsense, none can doubt.
By men of rank drawn out;—
That all his contributions are
Rank nonsense, none can doubt.
But lo! he marches to the ground,
Prepar'd for the assault;
Goosequills are bristling in the air,
The lines, as usual—halt!
Prepar'd for the assault;
Goosequills are bristling in the air,
The lines, as usual—halt!
The Critic thinks it some “review”—
And quick his armour dons;
He cons the prose, and cuts it up,
With many pros and cons.
And quick his armour dons;
He cons the prose, and cuts it up,
With many pros and cons.
Now from the “Heath” a band arise,
An Amazonian train;
The “Book of Beauty” leads them forth
For conquest on the—plain!
An Amazonian train;
The “Book of Beauty” leads them forth
For conquest on the—plain!
5
O! doubtless they can make a “head,”
They march so firm “eyes right;”
I'd send them all to L. E. L.—
Their praises to indite.
They march so firm “eyes right;”
I'd send them all to L. E. L.—
Their praises to indite.
The “Landscape” boldly “takes the field,”
Like hound upon the scent;
They're all in tent:—the “Amulet”
On preaching is intent.
Like hound upon the scent;
They're all in tent:—the “Amulet”
On preaching is intent.
The “Literary Souvenir” too
Appears with “lines” in lots;
“What's in a name?” who cry, will find
Taste in the name of Watts!
Appears with “lines” in lots;
“What's in a name?” who cry, will find
Taste in the name of Watts!
Its numbers are so musical,
Just like a “band” they chime—
For though old Time hath verse improv'd,
Yet Master Watts “beats time.”
Just like a “band” they chime—
For though old Time hath verse improv'd,
Yet Master Watts “beats time.”
6
The “Comic Offering” unfolds
Her banner to the breeze—
Just like a satin pincushion
All full of points—that please—
Her banner to the breeze—
Just like a satin pincushion
All full of points—that please—
But never wound!—the leader is
Far too polite, that's poz!
So honest too—some wish that she
A “little sharper” was!
Far too polite, that's poz!
So honest too—some wish that she
A “little sharper” was!
The “Picturesque” appears in view,
And not without his “tale;”
He soars o'er mountains, and unlike
A novice takes the “vale.”
And not without his “tale;”
He soars o'er mountains, and unlike
A novice takes the “vale.”
The “Friendship's Offering” comes forth:—
The “Comic” cries, no doubt,
“'Twill be a pleasant game, in which
Two ‘Offerings’ are out!”
The “Comic” cries, no doubt,
“'Twill be a pleasant game, in which
Two ‘Offerings’ are out!”
7
And lo! the brave “Forget-me-not”
Comes boldly in the van;
Arm'd at all points, the skilful Muse
Bids fair to hack her man!
Comes boldly in the van;
Arm'd at all points, the skilful Muse
Bids fair to hack her man!
The “Oriental” surely doth
On “elephant” appear;
But in the rear it takes its “post,”
And “foolscap's” doom'd to wear.
On “elephant” appear;
But in the rear it takes its “post,”
And “foolscap's” doom'd to wear.
“Though last, not least in our dear love!”
The “Comic” comes to claim
Its meed of praise,—as at a feast
To meat succeeds the “game.”
[OMITTED]
The “Comic” comes to claim
Its meed of praise,—as at a feast
To meat succeeds the “game.”
Each chief essays to win the palm
By loud and vaunting boast;
'Tis evident there'll be a “broil”
'Mong those who'd “rule the roast.”
By loud and vaunting boast;
'Tis evident there'll be a “broil”
'Mong those who'd “rule the roast.”
8
“You know,” the “Comic Offering” cries,
“I've made a noise, full well.”
“A noise!” exclaims the “Comic;” “yes,
Just like a muffled bell!”
“I've made a noise, full well.”
“A noise!” exclaims the “Comic;” “yes,
Just like a muffled bell!”
“Ah! I shall live,” she cries, “when thou
On Styx art cut adrift—”
“Yes, then,” the “Comic” cries, “the world
With thee will make a shift!
On Styx art cut adrift—”
“Yes, then,” the “Comic” cries, “the world
With thee will make a shift!
“But when I die ‘choice spirits’ shall
Embalm me in the grave;
But, O! whate'er thy faith may be,
Thy ‘good works’ ne'er will save!”
[OMITTED]
Embalm me in the grave;
But, O! whate'er thy faith may be,
Thy ‘good works’ ne'er will save!”
Deploying now upon the plain,
Each leader shows his force,
Resolving in the race of Fame
To take the shortest course;
Each leader shows his force,
Resolving in the race of Fame
To take the shortest course;
9
And, like the valiant chiefs of old,
Prepares to make a speech;
And all his men, however “taut,”
Determines now to teach.
Prepares to make a speech;
And all his men, however “taut,”
Determines now to teach.
The noble “Keepsake,” with a bow,
Steps forth, all clad in red,
And cries—(with fingers in his curls)—
“I've something in my head!
Steps forth, all clad in red,
And cries—(with fingers in his curls)—
“I've something in my head!
“O yes! ye lords and ladies bright,
Whom none in prose can match,
Or sonnetteering—come with me,
I'll lead you to the scratch.
Whom none in prose can match,
Or sonnetteering—come with me,
I'll lead you to the scratch.
“I'll put my best leg foremost, and
I'll nothing do by halves;
If calves they call ye—I will hide
‘In crimson boots my calves!’
I'll nothing do by halves;
If calves they call ye—I will hide
‘In crimson boots my calves!’
10
“In this wide field I'll never shrink
With low-born, sneaking fear,
For I (who 'm bound to many lords)
Hold I'm bound to a-peer!
With low-born, sneaking fear,
For I (who 'm bound to many lords)
Hold I'm bound to a-peer!
“Then strike, my Tulips! never heed,
But tip 'em like for like;
For if we get the worst—why then,
My lords, we can but—strike!
But tip 'em like for like;
For if we get the worst—why then,
My lords, we can but—strike!
“The base canaille in vain compete,
For them there is no hope;
Their prose will have a period soon—
Their ‘lines’ deserve a rope!
For them there is no hope;
Their prose will have a period soon—
Their ‘lines’ deserve a rope!
“Then ‘strike the light guitar!’ my lords,
For you alone 'tis strung,—
Your praises loud, throughout the land,
How many belles have rung!”
[OMITTED]
For you alone 'tis strung,—
Your praises loud, throughout the land,
How many belles have rung!”
11
The “Landscape” cries, “Stand firm, my friends;
Who can their aid refuse?
For we must win:—I'm proud to say,
The world approves our ‘views.’
Who can their aid refuse?
For we must win:—I'm proud to say,
The world approves our ‘views.’
“In war we are no novices,
To us 'tis only sport;
Cities we've ta'en with ease, and oft
A battlemented fort!
To us 'tis only sport;
Cities we've ta'en with ease, and oft
A battlemented fort!
“An ‘Artist’ is our Treasurer—
Whom we both praise and thank;
For funds we ne'er shall want, for he
Can draw on any bank!
Whom we both praise and thank;
For funds we ne'er shall want, for he
Can draw on any bank!
“Yes! he can blow, or paint a cloud,
For no foe cares a rush;
And though they hunt him like a fox,
He'll never lose his brush!
For no foe cares a rush;
And though they hunt him like a fox,
He'll never lose his brush!
12
“The jealous foe may charge on foot
Or horse with clanging hoofs,
Howe'er our courage they may doubt,
We'll quickly give them ‘proofs.’”
[OMITTED]
Or horse with clanging hoofs,
Howe'er our courage they may doubt,
We'll quickly give them ‘proofs.’”
The “Amulet,” in cassock drest,
Steps forth with solemn gait;
With eyes and body lowly bent,
His force addresses straight:—
Steps forth with solemn gait;
With eyes and body lowly bent,
His force addresses straight:—
“O Brethren! O Brethren!
Let's forth and fight the fight;
Our might is small, but 'twill increase,
Just like the widow's mite!
Let's forth and fight the fight;
Our might is small, but 'twill increase,
Just like the widow's mite!
“Morality and virtue shield
Our bosoms from the lance,
Then let our ‘columns’ on, and dare
The light of truth advance.
[OMITTED]
Our bosoms from the lance,
Then let our ‘columns’ on, and dare
The light of truth advance.
13
The “Book of Beauty,” smiling sweet,
Just like a rose arose!
“O, lovely Amazons!” she cried,
“We all can bend our—beaux!
Just like a rose arose!
“O, lovely Amazons!” she cried,
“We all can bend our—beaux!
“Then nothing fear, I'll lead ye on,
Like Dian in the hunt;
Our foes shall quickly find we wear
No—‘artificial front.’
Like Dian in the hunt;
Our foes shall quickly find we wear
No—‘artificial front.’
“Yes, they shall fall, like autumn leaves,
And”—adding while she laugh'd—
“An arrow 'scape 'twill be to those
Who shall avoid my shaft!
And”—adding while she laugh'd—
“An arrow 'scape 'twill be to those
Who shall avoid my shaft!
“And should they rudely break our squares,
And make us yield our ground;
We'll ‘compass them, and quickly prove
That we can fight—around!’
And make us yield our ground;
We'll ‘compass them, and quickly prove
That we can fight—around!’
14
“Both right and left we'll pour our darts,
Their terror to increase;
We'll harass them;—we'll take their guns,
And leave the foe—no piece!
Their terror to increase;
We'll harass them;—we'll take their guns,
And leave the foe—no piece!
“But should they, heartless, still refuse
To yield to Beauty's arms,
Like witches we must have recourse
To our unfailing charms!”
[OMITTED]
To yield to Beauty's arms,
Like witches we must have recourse
To our unfailing charms!”
Upon a huge white elephant
The “Oriental” came;
His look was wild, and all confess'd
They never found him—tame!
The “Oriental” came;
His look was wild, and all confess'd
They never found him—tame!
“Gems of the world!” he blandly cried,
“Stand firm, whate'er betide;
They'll never beat us in the field,
We are too big—to hide!
“Stand firm, whate'er betide;
They'll never beat us in the field,
We are too big—to hide!
15
“Like ostrich eggs, we'll crack 'em all,
And strew them on the sands!
Like well-groom'd barbs they all shall be
Well curried by our hands.
And strew them on the sands!
Like well-groom'd barbs they all shall be
Well curried by our hands.
“'Tis true, they roar like tigers fierce,
And threaten us with wipes—
O! if they must be tigers, we
Will furnish them with stripes!
And threaten us with wipes—
O! if they must be tigers, we
Will furnish them with stripes!
“The fools deceive themselves, and think
We cannot drill a corps;
And when they see my elephant,
Mistake him for a—bore!
We cannot drill a corps;
And when they see my elephant,
Mistake him for a—bore!
“But shrink not, I will lead ye on,
Be stedfast to a man;
And though they mock our diligence,
They shall not mock our van!
[OMITTED]
Be stedfast to a man;
And though they mock our diligence,
They shall not mock our van!
16
The “Comic Offering” appears,
In muslin white array'd;
Quite recherchée and à-la-mode,
And well used to—parade!
In muslin white array'd;
Quite recherchée and à-la-mode,
And well used to—parade!
In look a hero!—and her wit
So delicate and fine;
Its point is quite invisible—
'Tis jest—in a decline!
So delicate and fine;
Its point is quite invisible—
'Tis jest—in a decline!
“When Greek meets Greek,” she smiling cries,
“Then comes the tug of war!”
As I have seen two sparrows fight
All at the Beulah Spa!
“Then comes the tug of war!”
As I have seen two sparrows fight
All at the Beulah Spa!
“The front shown by the enemy
In me breeds no alarms;
Arm'd cap-à-pié although it be,
'Tis but a—child in arms!
In me breeds no alarms;
Arm'd cap-à-pié although it be,
'Tis but a—child in arms!
17
“Yon rival, ‘Comic,’ (vulgar fool!)
That plays such antic tricks,
May boast his ‘cuts’—but I have learn'd
To dance, and can ‘cut six.’
That plays such antic tricks,
May boast his ‘cuts’—but I have learn'd
To dance, and can ‘cut six.’
“Ye know he always lags behind;
Aye, last upon the scene,
Backward in coming forth—while I
Have ever ‘forward’ been.
Aye, last upon the scene,
Backward in coming forth—while I
Have ever ‘forward’ been.
“Yes, let them sneer; I've ‘troops of friends,’
Well arm'd with shafts of wit;
Suppose they strike—they hit a-miss—
While your miss proves a hit!
Well arm'd with shafts of wit;
Suppose they strike—they hit a-miss—
While your miss proves a hit!
“Nay, singly I dare take the field,
And down my gauntlet fling;
With any champion I'll engage,
If he'll provide—the ring!
And down my gauntlet fling;
With any champion I'll engage,
If he'll provide—the ring!
18
“Because I'm of the softer sex
They fancy I shall quake;
But all their threaten'd beating ne'er
Thy chief can ‘softer’ make!
They fancy I shall quake;
But all their threaten'd beating ne'er
Thy chief can ‘softer’ make!
“Then, draw the sword, mes camarades!
At least we'll try a pass;
And soon we'll crop these boasting blades,
As they were blades of grass!”
[OMITTED]
At least we'll try a pass;
And soon we'll crop these boasting blades,
As they were blades of grass!”
“Bravo! bravo!”—the marshall'd foe,
Her speech in mock'ry greet:
She frowns, and cries, “These bravoes soon
“With huzzas we will meet!”
Her speech in mock'ry greet:
She frowns, and cries, “These bravoes soon
“With huzzas we will meet!”
Now speaks the “Friendship's Offering”
To his assembled band:
“Bards! put your best leg foremost, for
“Your feet will all be scann'd.
To his assembled band:
“Bards! put your best leg foremost, for
“Your feet will all be scann'd.
19
“In a fine frenzy roll your eyes,
And turn your collars down,
For, oh! 'tis neck or nothing now,
Which shall surprise the town.
And turn your collars down,
For, oh! 'tis neck or nothing now,
Which shall surprise the town.
“Genius of Grub Street! lend your aid,
(You cannot be a-verse!)
Then vain shall Cockney critics cry,
Your rhymes were never worse!
(You cannot be a-verse!)
Then vain shall Cockney critics cry,
Your rhymes were never worse!
“Ye prosing gentlemen, who've hacks,
Round to their tails, pray, turn;
Then (though there's none of you are swift)
At least you'll look a-stern!
Round to their tails, pray, turn;
Then (though there's none of you are swift)
At least you'll look a-stern!
“Ye sentimental sonnetteers,
Whom all the ladies prize,
In fustian dress'd, look big, and win
The damsels by your—size!
Whom all the ladies prize,
In fustian dress'd, look big, and win
The damsels by your—size!
20
“Oh, Pathos! lead our cavalry,
And none shall 'scape their fate;
Heavy they all acknowledge you,
And must yield to your weight.
And none shall 'scape their fate;
Heavy they all acknowledge you,
And must yield to your weight.
“Then let us forward, in their wheel
We'll quickly put a spoke;
With us, if they will ‘pick a crow,’
They speedily shall croak!
[OMITTED]
We'll quickly put a spoke;
With us, if they will ‘pick a crow,’
They speedily shall croak!
“Forget-me-not!” the veteran,
Shook back his silver locks;
“This preaching's very fine,” he cried;
“We'll answer them with knocks!
Shook back his silver locks;
“This preaching's very fine,” he cried;
“We'll answer them with knocks!
“Unfurl our standard! march in peace!
The coward only brags;
None who beneath our banner fights,
In spirit ever flags.
The coward only brags;
None who beneath our banner fights,
In spirit ever flags.
21
“First in the field, we led the way
To glory and to fame!
We sought a name—we hit the mark,
So true we took an aim!
To glory and to fame!
We sought a name—we hit the mark,
So true we took an aim!
“The sun of favour smiled on us,
And lo! these shadows came,
As diff'rent from the substance as
Vile maggots are to game!
And lo! these shadows came,
As diff'rent from the substance as
Vile maggots are to game!
“They talk of striking!—save the mark!
I heed not what they say;
For, if they strike, like many more,
'Twill be—for lack of pay.
I heed not what they say;
For, if they strike, like many more,
'Twill be—for lack of pay.
They strike! yes, downwards they will strike,
Like roots in garden lands;
Or, like an eight-day clock, they'll strike,
That is—not with their hands!
Like roots in garden lands;
Or, like an eight-day clock, they'll strike,
That is—not with their hands!
22
“Then on, my comrades, bold and free,
'Gainst them we'll stand alone;
Their trumpeters will surely be—
Just like their trumpets—blown!
'Gainst them we'll stand alone;
Their trumpeters will surely be—
Just like their trumpets—blown!
“They've ta'en the field, but not the town;
No! that is still our own;
They'll change their note—like dog's-meat men—
Unto a barrow-tone!
No! that is still our own;
They'll change their note—like dog's-meat men—
Unto a barrow-tone!
“Then shout aloud, ‘Forget-me-not!’
And buckle on the targe;
Wave brand and spear high in the air,
And—like a lawyer—charge!”
[OMITTED]
And buckle on the targe;
Wave brand and spear high in the air,
And—like a lawyer—charge!”
The “Picturesque” stood forth with grace,
And cried, “The foe looks big!
But all that meddle with our branch,
Shall quickly ‘hop the twig.’
And cried, “The foe looks big!
But all that meddle with our branch,
Shall quickly ‘hop the twig.’
23
“O! soon these churls that are so free
We will our pris'ners make;
For them, like trees in winter keen,
Without their leaves, we'll take.
We will our pris'ners make;
For them, like trees in winter keen,
Without their leaves, we'll take.
“Draw! draw! (they cry) enough to scare
A park of nurs'ry maids!
We have no need to shout, for we
Are fam'd for—drawing blades!
A park of nurs'ry maids!
We have no need to shout, for we
Are fam'd for—drawing blades!
“I've ta'en a ‘bird's-eye view’ of them;
They all are mighty fine!
But soon the upstart fools shall find
The ‘horizontal line.’
They all are mighty fine!
But soon the upstart fools shall find
The ‘horizontal line.’
“They think they shall increase their fame,
This is their ‘point of sight;’—
Their ‘point’ must be the ‘vanishing,’
We'll prove in their despite.
This is their ‘point of sight;’—
Their ‘point’ must be the ‘vanishing,’
We'll prove in their despite.
24
“We're Englishmen! all thorough-bred,
(Where will they find the like?)
Then fear no blows, for if they hit,
They'll at ‘right Angles’ strike.
(Where will they find the like?)
Then fear no blows, for if they hit,
They'll at ‘right Angles’ strike.
“Our cause is just, then let us treat
The jeering foe with scorn;
They boast of their uprightness, but
All on ‘one side’ they're drawn.
The jeering foe with scorn;
They boast of their uprightness, but
All on ‘one side’ they're drawn.
“They're like unfinish'd sketches yet,
However loud they talk;
One good oil picture surely, lads,
Is worth a score in chalk.
However loud they talk;
One good oil picture surely, lads,
Is worth a score in chalk.
“With such a prospect, let us on
And press the puny corps;
Soon in the ‘back-ground’ they will be,
While we are in the ‘fore.’”
[OMITTED]
And press the puny corps;
Soon in the ‘back-ground’ they will be,
While we are in the ‘fore.’”
25
The “Literary Souvenir” spoke
In accents sweet and bland:—
“Display your colours, friends, for we
At least can boast—a stand!
In accents sweet and bland:—
“Display your colours, friends, for we
At least can boast—a stand!
“The foe may vaunt their heavy horse,
(They're only fit for drays,)
But we ('tis not assuming much)—
We too can boast our ‘bays!’
(They're only fit for drays,)
But we ('tis not assuming much)—
We too can boast our ‘bays!’
“Like flaring poppies, 'neath the scythe,
Shall our opponents fall;
They undertake, in vain, to please
The undertaker's pall!’
Shall our opponents fall;
They undertake, in vain, to please
The undertaker's pall!’
“Like dew-drops, that begem the blades
Of grass at early morn,
Shall tears of sorrow overflow
The face of all the lorn!
Of grass at early morn,
Shall tears of sorrow overflow
The face of all the lorn!
26
“Pan may defy Apollo, but
Compete with him ne'er can;—
So will our foe's boast truly prove
A mere flash in the pan.
Compete with him ne'er can;—
So will our foe's boast truly prove
A mere flash in the pan.
“As from the boughs the rime-frost flies,
When Sol appears by times,
So shall our dazzling brightness melt
And dissipate their rhymes!
When Sol appears by times,
So shall our dazzling brightness melt
And dissipate their rhymes!
“They fondly dream to win applause
(I know their politics),
But, oh! they'll never get a ‘notch,’
Unless they ‘cut their sticks.’”
(I know their politics),
But, oh! they'll never get a ‘notch,’
Unless they ‘cut their sticks.’”
With lath in hand, and cap and bells,
And coat of motley hue,
The “Comic,” hearing others “crow,”
Cried—“Cock-a-doodle-doo!”
And coat of motley hue,
The “Comic,” hearing others “crow,”
Cried—“Cock-a-doodle-doo!”
27
And pricking o'er the plain he came
Upon a donkey's back—
And said:—“Whatever others get
My beast will have his—‘whack!’
Upon a donkey's back—
And said:—“Whatever others get
My beast will have his—‘whack!’
“Courage, my boys! with placid smiles
Let ev'ry phiz be deck'd;
Calm let us be as summer sea—
As if we nothing reck'd!
Let ev'ry phiz be deck'd;
Calm let us be as summer sea—
As if we nothing reck'd!
“Fear nought from all this proud array,
An awkward squad at best;
And speedily these raw recruits
Shall by our hands be dress'd!
An awkward squad at best;
And speedily these raw recruits
Shall by our hands be dress'd!
“They seek for fame, but History
Will blink them, by the mass!
Four words will suffice for the host;
Just these: ‘It came—to pass!’
Will blink them, by the mass!
Four words will suffice for the host;
Just these: ‘It came—to pass!’
28
“Of their ‘crack’ regiments they may talk—
Vain talk it is, alack!
But I will match 'em, for I'll make
My own with laughter crack.”
Vain talk it is, alack!
But I will match 'em, for I'll make
My own with laughter crack.”
“For all their grave and serious looks
I do not care a pin;
For though I wield a wooden sword,
My cuts shall make them grin!
I do not care a pin;
For though I wield a wooden sword,
My cuts shall make them grin!
“Yes! they may laugh at my ‘designs,’
While they design in vain;
I'll ne'er retreat—or if I cut,
I'll cut and come again.
While they design in vain;
I'll ne'er retreat—or if I cut,
I'll cut and come again.
“Dare any singly meet me here,
He surely will be spilt:
For I can joust as well as jest,
And I can—run a Tilt!”
[OMITTED]
He surely will be spilt:
For I can joust as well as jest,
And I can—run a Tilt!”
29
Loud rang the trumpets to assault,
The colours waved on high—
Those colours that were “warranted”
Neither to “run nor fly.”
The colours waved on high—
Those colours that were “warranted”
Neither to “run nor fly.”
“The Landscape” beat the “Picturesque;”
“Souvenir” the “Keepsake” beat;
“The Comic” beat the “Offering,”
And she beat—a retreat!
“Souvenir” the “Keepsake” beat;
“The Comic” beat the “Offering,”
And she beat—a retreat!
The “Amulet” [OMITTED]
[OMITTED]
[OMITTED]
[OMITTED] preys!
[OMITTED]
[OMITTED]
[OMITTED] preys!
The “Oriental” [OMITTED]
[OMITTED] 'tis plain,
[OMITTED] “another Daniel,” and
[OMITTED] a sugar-cane!
[OMITTED] 'tis plain,
[OMITTED] “another Daniel,” and
[OMITTED] a sugar-cane!
30
The “Forget-me-not” [OMITTED]
[OMITTED] no concession;
[OMITTED]
[OMITTED] a great impression.
[OMITTED] no concession;
[OMITTED]
[OMITTED] a great impression.
But how the Battle ended, we,
O, reader! cannot say;—
For “Volumes of Smoke” we could not see
Who bore the palm away.
O, reader! cannot say;—
For “Volumes of Smoke” we could not see
Who bore the palm away.
| The Battle of the "Annuals." | |